Healthcare stories

[florida80]

No Bald Announcements

Medical Office, New York, USA | Healthy | December 13, 2017


(I have noticed a small bald spot at the top of my hairline. Concerned, I make an appointment with a dermatologist to get it looked at.)

Nurse: “Okay, what seems to be the problem?”

Me: “I noticed I have a small bald spot on my head and am concerned about it.”

Nurse: *looks at the spot* “Oh, that doesn’t look to bad. Don’t worry about it, hon. I’ll have the doctor come in and help you.”

Me: “Okay, thank you.”

(I then wait about half an hour on the exam table until the doctor finally comes in to the room. He sits down in a chair without acknowledging me and reads my chart. He then stands up and leaves the room. About five minutes later he comes back in and walks towards me without speaking. I see a large syringe in his hand. He reaches up to my head with the syringe and is about to inject me when I back away from him.)

Me: “Okay, wait. What are you doing? What’s the syringe for?”

Doctor: “I need to give you an injection.”

Me: “Why, what’s the problem?”

Doctor: “You have a spot of alopecia. This will help it.”

Me: “What is in the syringe?”

Doctor: “Steroids. It’s fine.”

(The doctor then proceeded to grab my head and injected the area with the huge syringe. He disposed of it, took off his gloves, and left the room giving me no information about the condition, what caused it, or if it would go away. I left there pretty angry and worried. Thank god for the Internet because I was able to do enough research on it to not freak out. It cleared up and hasn’t been a problem since but, Jesus Christ, talk to your patients before stabbing them in the head with a needle.)

[florida80]

A Needling Suspicion They Did That On Purpose

Dentist, Texas, USA | Healthy | December 13, 2017


(The dentist’s assistant has treated me like a child the whole time because I said I have a needle phobia. Important note: I am in therapy for this, and the coping mechanism I learned was to steel myself for it, to watch it. I know most nurses think that it’s better not to watch, but I got the phobia from a bunch of medical students practicing on me at age 10, and not letting me say no or have any control over the situation at all. They practiced until my parents came in and threatened them. Since then, I have needed to prepare and watch.)

Assistant: “So we’re going to give you some numbing, okay, sweetie?”

Me: “Okay. Just tell me when you’re using the needle. I need to know.”

Assistant: “Of course, honey. Now I’m just going to make sure your teeth are squeaky clean for the procedure.”

(She starts using different tools, and I let my mind wander… until I feel a needle pierce my gums. I jump.)

Me: *mumbling because of her hand* “Hey! I told you to tell me!”

Assistant: “Tell you what, sweetie?”

Me: “When you used the needle!”

Assistant: “There’s no needle, silly!”

(I push my tongue against the side. I can also feel it on my lips. This is freaking me out worse than if she had told me.)

Me: “Uh-huh!”

Assistant: “Stop being ridiculous!” *finishes the injection, pulls out the needle* “There. That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

(I started having flashbacks so I couldn’t even respond. I got up and ran into the bathroom, barricading the door. The dental assistant acted confused and surprised and asked me what’s wrong. I didn’t answer her. The dentist ended up rescheduling my appointment, but brushed it off when I told him what she did. I didn’t let her touch me again.)

[florida80]

Death-Defying Expectations

School, USA | Healthy | December 12, 2017


(An EMT has come to our school to train us on how to use the new defibrillator. He’s not impressed with our skills.)

Me: “So after it’s done shocking, do we take the pads off their chest?”

EMT: “No, just let the coroner do that.” *pause* “I mean the doctor.”

[florida80]

Will Have To Reorient Your Understanding On Lifestyle

Canada, Medical Office, Ontario | Healthy | December 12, 2017


(My husband is an RNA, and the doctor asks him to explain the procedure going forward to a patient who is experiencing symptoms relating to diet and lack of exercise.)

Husband: “So, the doctor has told you that many of your symptoms are related to diet and lack of exercise. I’m going to go over some programs you can take advantage of to help change your lifestyle.”

Patient: *startled* “I have to change my lifestyle?!”

Husband: “Yes, your going to have to change it completely if you want to start feeling better. I have some brochures here for the various programs we are going to offer to get you signed up for. They all offer professionals in various fields who can help you learn how to incorporate these changes into your routine so they became a natural part of your life.”

Patient: *getting up, trying to gather her jacket and purse to leave, while shaking and clearly outraged* “I can’t believe you are asking me to join these programs! I always told my husband he was being silly, no one was trying to change lifestyles and that he was just wrong, but he’s right! I can’t believe this is happening. The news is going to hear about this!”

(Then she stormed out. My poor confused husband told the doctor what happened, and the doctor called the patient later in the day to try to find out what set her off. It turned out she didn’t understand that the doctor’s office was trying to set her up with a dietician, a charity-supervised walking group, a swim aerobics class, and publicly-offered healthy cooking classes. She legitimately thought that the ‘professional services’ would help her seamlessly change her ‘lifestyle’ to gay!)

[florida80]

I’m Gonna Go With Time-Travel

Colorado, Denver, Phone, Time, USA | Healthy | December 12, 2017


(I am calling my doctor’s office to make an appointment and she is asking for basic information like my name and date of birth.)

Receptionist: “And when is your date of birth?”

Me: “February first, ‘94.”

Receptionist: “Is that 1994?”

Me: “Well, unless I’m from the future or look great for 123, yes, 1994.”

[florida80]

Mouth Wide Shut

Dentist, Louisiana, USA | Healthy | December 11, 2017


(For some reason, all of my baby teeth didn’t come out on their own, so at 13 I had to have all four of my canines removed. The dentist removes the ones on the left side without issue and I go back a few weeks later to have the ones on the right removed. The bottom one comes out easily enough but when the dentist tries to pull out the top one, he winds up roughly yanking my head forward.)

Me: *yelps but keeps mouth open* “Ow! That hurt!”

Dentist: *grasps my tooth again and tries to wiggle it* “Hmm, looks like it’s still got the root. That’s weird.”

Me: “Does it need cutting out?”

Dentist: “Nah, it just means you have to open your mouth wider.”

Me: *frowning* “It doesn’t get wider than that.”

Dentist: “Sure, you can.”

(He then proceeds to put one hand in my mouth and tries to force my mouth open wider than is physically possible. My jaw makes a loud, clicking sort of pop as he does and I shout in pain then, without thinking, I bite down on his hand. HARD. He screams and he and his assistant pry my mouth open. I’m given another shot of Novocaine and he finally RIPS my tooth out. He gives me the tooth as a souvenir and his assistant packs the holes in my mouth then sends me on my way. I can’t get out to my mom out fast enough and refuse to let her schedule a follow-up or the cleaning I’m due.)

Mom: *as we’re getting in the car* “What was that screaming? Was that you?”

Me: “Nope, I bit the dentist. And I bit him good, too.”

Mom: *shocked* “Oh, my god, [My Name]! Why?!”

(I relate what happened and she stares at me with her mouth hanging open.)

Mom: *muttering as we drive off* “We are NOT coming back here. Ever. And I’m telling everyone I know to never come here.”

(About a year later the dentist closed his practice.)

[florida80]

A Pathological Vapo-Rub User

Chicago, Grocery Store, USA | Healthy | December 11, 2017


(I’m out grocery shopping, and I’m having trouble finding something, so I go to find a store employee. It’s worth noting that I’m a very petite blond woman in my early thirties.)

Me: “Excuse me, do you happen to know where the VapoRub is?”

Stocker: “Oh, yeah, it’s over here.”

(He hands me a tub of the stuff formulated for babies, and I thank him and immediately swap it out for a jar of the menthol mint formula.)

Stocker: “Ma’am, you don’t want to use that stuff with your kids. It’ll be too strong for them.”

Me: “Well, that’s good, because I don’t have kids.”

Stocker: “What’s it for, then?”

Me: “Cadavers. I’m a pathologist, and peppermint oil just doesn’t last through the workday. Water deaths, especially; you would not believe the smell…”

(The guy went sheet-white, and hurried away as fast as he could without running. I felt kind of bad, but it was definitely the funniest part of my day! My mentor always said that pathologists have the weirdest sense of humor…)

[florida80]

Scream Bloody Murder At The Sight Of Blood

Canada, Daycare, Ontario | Healthy | December 11, 2017


(My son is 18 months old. I am planning on entering him in daycare and returning to work. I check around, and choose a daycare in part because of the above and beyond training the staff all have, including comprehensive (instead of emergency only) first aid training, annually. About three weeks after I enroll him, I get a call at work from a frantic daycare worker, who speaks perfect English, despite what happens next.)

Worker: “Your son was climbing on a chair and fell. He hit his head quite badly. There is a lot of blood coming out of his ear, and he hasn’t moved in 15 minutes!”

Me: “Is he talking or doing anything!”

Worker: “No, he hasn’t done anything at all since he fell. Maybe you should come pick him up.”

Me: “Call an ambulance. That’s very serious. Call right away. I’ll be there soon!”

(I throw my keys at my boss, barely tell him that my son is hurt and I have to go, run out of work, and drive like an idiot, all while picturing the most horrible things, and arrive just as the ambulance gets there. The ambulance attendants and I rush inside to find my son calmly lying in a staff member’s lap, getting read to, trying to reach up and grab the book closer to himself. When he sees me he gets up and runs over to me, gabbing away the whole time. The staff member I talked to originally turns to me and the ambulance attendants.)

Worker: “That’s the first time he’s gotten up since he fell. He’s been lying in her lap reading books for the last half hour. We checked him over and he’s nicked his earlobe, which HAS bled quite a lot. That’s why I thought his mom should pick him up, but she insisted I call the ambulance, so I thought I better comply. Lawsuits, you know.” *stupid giggle*

(The ambulance attendants were extremely disgruntled to be called out for something that clearly wasn’t an emergency of any sort, and the worker keeps trying to blame me (‘New parents! Always overreacting to normal childhood bumps and bruises. Insisted I call an ambulance, etc.’) I may have lost it a little bit, yelling at her that her wildly inaccurate description of his injuries is why I insisted on her calling the ambulance, and that she had caused not only a huge waste of time for emergency services, but also extreme anxiety for me in her effort to make the story seem more interesting, or whatever her problem was.)

[florida80]

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Pumpkin Season Finally Turned Deadly

Canada, Farm, Ontario | Healthy | December 10, 2017


(I am working at a pumpkin patch and we have to move the rotting pumpkins to a huge garbage bin. I and two coworkers have the pumpkins in a ranger, a huge garbage bin, and are throwing them into the dumpster. [Coworker #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] throws the pumpkin and it hits [Coworker #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ] on the head, like, smack dab in the middle of the head.)

Coworker #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “OH, MY GOD, ARE YOU OKAY?!”

Coworker #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “Yeah, I blacked out for a bit but I’m fine.”

Me: “Oh, god, hold on; let me get someone!”

Coworker #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “I’m fine; I’ve had a concussion before I know the drill. Let’s finish this!”

Me: “What? No, I need to get someone! You said you blacked out!”

Coworker #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “It’s fine; I’ll have my sister wake me up every few hours.”

Coworker #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “She says she’s fine. I didn’t mean to hit her anyway.”

(Against my better judgment, we finished the pumpkins and all signed out and went home. [Coworker #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] called in the next day and I saw she posted on her FB wall she was in the hospital with, guess what? A concussion!)

[florida80]

Prescribing Some Business Advice

home, USA | Healthy | December 9, 2017


(I’ve just gotten back from the pharmacy, having filled a new prescription for some anti-anxiety medication. The prescription was for a much larger supply than I’m used to. Also, my boyfriend works in mental health, and as such is fairly familiar with psych pharmaceuticals.)

Me: “So, do you think they gave me enough?” *showing him the huge prescription bottle*

Boyfriend: “Whoa. They’re tiny, too. Is that, like, a year’s supply?!”

Me: “Not really. See, look: they’re in little bars. It just looks like lots of tiny pills.”

Boyfriend: “So it’s Xanax?”

Me: “Um, the doctor said it’s BuSpar.”

Boyfriend: “BuSpar is a Xanax analogue. Not one-to-one, but still, you could sell those for $15 a pop!”

(He gives a thoughtful pause, then turns on the voice chat with his friends on his computer, which he’d muted to talk to me.)

Boyfriend: “Hey! Anyone wanna buy some Xanax?”

(He was joking, of course.)

[florida80]

Their Medical Opinion Is Not Abs-olute

Hospital, Non-Dialogue, USA | Healthy | December 8, 2017


When I was in grad school I was hit by a car while walking home one night. At the time it appeared all I suffered was road rash and bruises and I was sent home from the ER pretty quickly, but over the next several months internal symptoms started manifesting, culminating in me being unable to eat or drink anything without suffering severe abdominal pain.

I’m home with my parents for the summer when it gets so bad they call me an ambulance and accompany me to the ER. Before anyone can tell the first person who sees me not to do so, they’ve put morphine in my IV, which I do NOT get along with, so when the doctor arrives to check me out I’m being terribly sick while my poor mother holds the bucket. The doctor takes one look at me (female, age 22) and starts lecturing me about the evils of binge drinking and really, if I’m going to drink enough beer to make me sick I deserve the consequences. By the time I could lift my head enough to see what was going on, two nurses and an orderly were holding back my dad from wreaking grave bodily injury on this idiot. (As it happens, never before or since have I ever had enough to drink that it made me sick.)

Turned out the impact trauma had caused intestinal adhesions which needed to be surgically cut loose so peristalsis would function normally again. No thanks to that idiot doc, or the four after him — the first doctor who actually listened to me and who performed the surgery that fixed everything was, not coincidentally, the only female doctor I saw through the whole ordeal. I have not seen a male doctor since!

[florida80]

Find An Opening For The Explanation

Chicago, Family & Kids, Illinois, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | December 8, 2017


(My daughter is six years old and takes everything literally. For example, when saying something stinks such as “Oh, well, that stinks; you can come out for the day” she will ask me, “How does it smell?” Today I had to take her to her pediatric cardiologist, to have her heart murmur checked. I explained to her that it wasn’t going to hurt and that the doctor was just going to listen to her heart. She said okay and I thought nothing more of it. But when the nurse came in.)

Nurse: “All right, we are going to look at your heart.”

Daughter: “Okay. I took my shirt off, but how are you going to open my body to see my heart? Because Mommy said this wouldn’t hurt.”

(I will admit, the nurse’s eyes only bugged out for a second before she pulled herself together and explained that she had a special camera to look at it without having to “open her body.” Next time I will try to remember to explain a bit better!)



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X-Dentist

Dentist, Minnesota, USA | Healthy | December 8, 2017


(After looking for a good long while, I finally find a dentist that takes my insurance. I’ve only been to a dentist twice in my life — I grew up very poor — but I’ve been having bad pain in my jaw. An older gentleman, the dentist, ushers me behind a curtain and sits me on the dentist chair.)

Dentist: “So, how long since your last dental appointment?”

Me: “About six years ago I went to a free dental clinic. Before that, I think I was in second grade. That’s it.”

Dentist: *flatly* “Ah. So you probably have bad teeth. Open up; let me see the damage. Do you even brush your teeth?”

(My wife and I make significant eye contact around the curtain. The dentist puts on gloves and pokes my teeth a couple of times with a finger.)

Dentist: “Huh. You’ve actually got great teeth. Did you grow up in a third world country?”

Me: “I grew up in Tennessee.”

Dentist: “Oh, so THAT’S why. Southern people don’t take care of their teeth. Well, your teeth look really good actually, except for that overlap in the front.” *he pokes my top front teeth, one of which overlaps the slightest bit onto the other* “That’s unfortunate because without it you’d have perfect teeth. I’m not sure why you came in today. You don’t have any cavities.”

Me: “…what about that jaw pain?”

Dentist: “Right, that. Well, I guess I could take X-rays if you want. I’m not sure why you’d want them. You’re just grinding your teeth.”

Me: “I’ve never had dental X-rays done, though. Shouldn’t we get an X-ray to check?”

Dentist: *massive sigh* “Fine, fine, we’ll do them. I think you just want to waste some time.”

(Lo and behold, the X-rays showed my bottom wisdom teeth needed to come out ASAP. They grew sideways and are pushing the roots of the teeth next to them, shifting the teeth and causing my pain. The dentist was surprised, and then tried to sell me a $100 mouth guard that would stop the pain, because he thought I’m grinding my teeth and that my wisdom teeth had nothing to do with it. We did not take him up on the offer and are looking for a new dentist.)

[florida80]

Some Heart-Warming Explanations

Hawaii, Hospital, USA | Healthy | December 7, 2017


(I have visited the cardiologist for EKGs and echoes every two years since I was born, and one year I am old enough to ask my doctor why I have to.)

Doctor: “You have a heart murmur. Arrhythmia and mitral valve prolapse.”

Me: “What’s that mean?”

Doctor: “Well, most people’s hearts have a steady two-beat. BUMP-bump, BUMP-bump, BUMP-bump, like a drummer. Your heart is like a jazz drummer, who just does whatever: BUMP-bump-bump, BUMP-bump-bump, BUMP, bump-BUMP, no bump. There’s extra beats and missed beats, with no pattern to it.”

Me: “What’s the other one?”

Doctor: “Imagine the hood of a Japanese convertible. The roof goes up, and when it comes back down, it fits perfectly into its base without problems, and is completely sealed. Now imagine the hood of an American convertible. When the roof comes back down, it doesn’t quite fit into the base; it’s off-center, and the air-conditioning will leak out and rain can get in. Your heart is an American car, and the valve is the convertible roof.”

(Two decades later, and I still love this doctor’s explanations to a confused kid.)

[florida80]

Their Behavior Is Not Hole-Hearted

Hawaii, Hospital, USA | Healthy | December 7, 2017


(I’m a young woman who was born with an innocent heart murmur that gets checked every few years; arrhythmia and mitral valve prolapse. I have recently suffered some strong heart palpitations that lasted an hour and left me exhausted and terrified that something’s wrong. After spending the night at the hospital, and the X-ray, EKG, and echo tests showing nothing new, I’m sent to a cardiologist for a stress test. After being stuck with enough wires that I look like a cyborg and 20 hellish “Now a little bit faster” minutes on the treadmill, I float light-headedly over to the exam table and lie down while they check the scans.)

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “Oh, wow. [Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ], come look at this.”

Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “Wow. I’ve never seen that outside of textbooks.”

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “Me, too! Hey, look at this part–”

(While the nurses are ‘oohing’ and ‘aahing’ at the picture on the screen, I’m staring at them with rising concern. My worry spikes when the doctor herself comes into the room, sees what they’re looking at, and proceeds to talk about it to them like she’s teaching a university lesson. Finally, I raise one of my trembling cyborg arms.)

Me: *weakly* “Um… excuse me?”

Doctor: *looking at me with surprise* “Yes?”

Me: “Is… is something wrong?”

Doctor: “Oh, no. You just have a hole in your heart.”

Me: “…I have a WHAT?”

Doctor: “But that’s not what’s causing your palpitations.”

Me: “It’s… not?”

Doctor: “Nope. It’s small and near the top of your heart; it shouldn’t be affecting you at all. It just happens sometimes when your heart muscle sinks to the bottom.”

Me: “Oh… okay. So there’s a hole in my heart, but… it’s not a problem. So it’s okay.

Doctor: “Yep. You can come back to keep an eye on it, though, just to make sure it doesn’t get any bigger.”

Me: “?!”

(That did not fill me with confidence, surprisingly. They never found a physical source for the palpitations, so eventually decided they were panic attacks, and I got to add ‘hole in the heart’ to my heart murmur repertoire.)

[florida80]

Doesn’t Have 20/20 Psychiatry

Psychiatrist, USA | Healthy | December 7, 2017


(I’ve suffered from mental health issues since I was young, but I wasn’t able to do anything about it because my family has issues believing that mental illness is real. A few years ago, while I was in college, things got really bad so I finally tried to tell my parents about it. It took a few months of frustration and arguing, but I eventually managed to convince them it was actually an issue. They found a psychiatrist I could see and I was excited at first. I thought I’d be able to get some help! I’d hardly walked in the door before I realized there would be a problem.)

Psychiatrist: *shaking my hand* “So, how old are you?”

Me: “I’m turning 20 next month.”

Psychiatrist: *laughs* “20? You’re far too young to have any problems! Why are you even here?”

Me: “Young or not, I actually do have a lot of symptoms I’m worried about.”

(I hand her a list I’d made of symptoms I’d been struggling with, including some rather severe ones. She sets it aside after barely glancing at it.)

Psychiatrist: “Why don’t you just tell me about yourself? Do you have a boyfriend?”

Me: “Um… no, I don’t?”

Psychiatrist: “Why don’t we talk about that. It might be causing some of your ‘issues.’”

(It was only downhill from there. She dismissed all my symptoms, including my suicidal ideation and dissociation, as nothing more than school stress or lacking a boyfriend. I was told I just needed to get out of the house more often and make a few friends, something my parents insisted was a cure-all as well. Ever since that day, nothing I’ve said has been able to convince them otherwise. The only reason I’ve improved at all — and mostly stopped being suicidal — is because of my college’s psychologist. I’d only found out there was a doctor on campus afterwards, and after meeting him, he was shocked I’d managed to make it as far as I had without any help at all. I’m living back at home now that I’ve graduated, only until I can find work, but he helped me immensely while I was still enrolled. I don’t think I would have survived school without his help.)

[florida80]

You Might Need To Sit Down For This

Hospital, Pennsylvania, Pittsburgh, USA | Healthy | December 6, 2017


(My mom and I have just arrived at the emergency room after being sent from a local fast ER over possible appendicitis. While we are getting checked in, an older man arrives.)

Man: “I’m having chest pain and pain in my arm.”

Nurse: “We’re taking you back immediately, sir. Please get in this wheelchair.”

Man: “No thanks; I’m good to walk.”

Nurse: “Please, sir, take a seat in the wheelchair.”

Man: “No, I insist I’m good to walk.”

Mom: “Take a d*** seat in the chair. If you’re having a heart attack do you really want to be walking right now?”

(He sat in the chair and grumbled while they took him away.)

[florida80]

One Bjorn Every Minute

Family & Kids, Funny Names, home, New York, USA | Healthy | December 6, 2017


(My husband and I have chosen a name for our child that is rare in our area. We’ve also gone with an older variant of its spelling which has a near silent letter. For the sake of the story let’s say it is Bjorn. Our doctor’s office does confirmation calls for our newborn visits.)

Receptionist: “This is a reminder call from [Family Doctor]’s office that ‘Bejorn’ has an appointment tomorrow at nine am.”

Me: *repeating back as an excuse to give pronunciation* “Bjorn—” *j sounds like a y* “—appointment tomorrow at nine am. Got it. Thank you.”

(At the appointment the receptionist calls for ‘Bejorn.’ I ponder a moment if it is better to correct the pronunciation or let it go. I smile and decide to say something so it doesn’t continue to pop up.)

Me: “It’s actuality Bjorn with the j being a y sound.”

(The receptionist doesn’t seem put off and the rest of the visit goes smoothly. Our family doctor is already familiar with the name having also been the one to deliver him. I’m getting a rare moment of sleep when the office calls to confirm my newborn’s next appointment. The voicemail made me laugh.)

Receptionist: “Hi this is [Receptionist] from [Family Doctor]’s office calling to remind you that…” *long pause where you could almost hear them thinking* “…your SON has an appointment tomorrow at 11 am.”

(Well played.)

[florida80]

Hungary For Some Medicine

Budapest, Hospital, Hungary | Healthy | December 6, 2017


(When I left Germany for a semester abroad people warned me that every foreign student has at least one horror story to tell from their experience. This one is mine. I go to Hungary. All my classes are in English, and most of the people I interact with are fluent in either English or German, so while I only know the most basic Hungarian — introduction phrases, greetings, how to order food — my Hungarian is not good and I communicate in English most of the time. Two months into my stay, I wake up with massive pain in my ears, and they are wet, like liquid is coming out of them. I call my mother, a nurse, who tells me it might be a middle-ear inflammation and that I need to go see a doctor immediately. But since my European insurance only covers emergencies, I have not been to a doctor so far and have no GP in town. I start searching online for an English-speaking doctor I can go to. I eventually find out that my best bets are the so-called “emergency centres” of each town district, apparently some kind of doctors’ offices where you pay cash and later are reimbursed by your insurance company. I decide to call the centre of my district. The person who answers the phone hands me over to the doctor on call. I describe my symptoms and my suspected diagnosis and she tells me to come to them right away. I take a cab to the office, where I only find a nurse unable to speak English.)

Me: “Hi! I called earlier; I am here to see the doctor.”

Nurse: “No doctor!”

(With both of us using translator apps, we end up establishing that the doctor is not here and I will have to wait two hours. So, I wait in pain, cold, with my nose running like crazy, in the “waiting room,” a room completely empty except for one metal bench. The doctor arrives more than 90 minutes later. While she gathers her tools, I describe my symptoms again. As soon as I mention pain in the ears, she stops and turns around.)

Doctor: “You are in the wrong place. You need to see a specialist.”

Me: “I’m sorry, what? I told you all that on the phone; you told me to come here!”

Doctor: “No, you need to go to the hospital.”

(She gives me a paper that I hope describes the reason she is sending me away, and the name of a hospital. The hospital is way closer to my place than the emergency centre is and I am quite angry, sick and miserable as I am, that I wasted more than two hours when she could have told me to go there on the phone. But it is already past noon by now, on a Friday, so I hurry, as normal business hours will end soon. I reach the hospital. The receptionist, again not an English speaker, motions for me that I am in the wrong place.)

Me: *using my translator app* “I was told to come here!”

(The receptionist brings me inside where a nurse can translate for me that I need to go to another entrance, two buildings down. I thank them and am on my way. By now, I am suffering even worse. My head feels like it will split open, my ears just radiate pain, and my nose is basically dripping like a faucet. I reach the right entrance and hand the paper I got at the emergency centre to the receptionist.)

Receptionist #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : *pushes the paper back to me and talks fast Hungarian*

Me: “Please, I do not speak Hungarian. Beszelek nincs magyarul!”

(She turns around and ignores me. I use my translator, type in, “Hello. I think I have an middle ear infection. I need a doctor; can you help me?” and hope the app will not mess it up too bad. I show the result to her, but she just looks away. I try to hand her my phone so she can type an answer in the translator, but she pushes it away, too. She ignores all my other attempts of communication. In my desperation, I use my last resort: I call the emergency number. As I am in a European capital, they should have some people speaking English. I finally end up talking to someone that understands me. By now, I am desperate and crying.)

Me: “Hello! I hope you can help me; I need an English-speaking doctor. I went to the emergency centre in [District];they refused to treat me and sent me to [Hospital]. But here, they won’t treat me either, and no one can tell me why! Please, I am in pain; I need a doctor!”

Operator: “That is no problem. I will find the closest doctor! Hmm… Yes… Okay! You need to go to the emergency centre in [District].”

Me: “STOP! I WAS THERE! I JUST TOLD YOU THEY REFUSED TO TREAT ME!”

(I am full-on crying now. I collapse to the floor, sobbing. The foyer is empty except for the receptionist that still ignores me.)

Operator: *sounding angry* “You need to calm down! I cannot understand you when you shout! I told you where to go, so go there! Emergency centre in [District]!”

(Finally, someone notices me. While I disconnect the call, a young med student runs to me, offering her help, and asking me what is wrong. I hand her my paper, explain what I have just been through, and tell her that the receptionist refuses to tell me where to go or to communicate at all. She goes and talks to the receptionist and returns with another piece of paper.)

Student: “Everything is all right. Your doctor sent you here because the ENT-walk-in clinic is here. But the clinic closed at noon. So, you need to go to the surgical ENT-ward. It is really close. I’ll write down the address for you. You go in there, hand the receptionist there your papers, and they will bring you to a doctor.”

(The address is just around the corner from my building. I go there, but when I see the building I lose all hope. I am not standing in front of a hospital; I am standing in front of a fast food place. I just want to go home, but I know that I need pain meds and antibiotics, and the search for a doctor will not get easier on the weekend. So, I enter the next pharmacy I see.)

Me: “I am so sorry, but can you help me? I have been searching for a doctor for more than four hours now. I am in pain, but everyone refuses to treat me! They gave me this address at the hospital, but there is only [Fast Food Place] there! And I know what they say about antibiotics in cow-meat, but I’m pretty sure I need more than a burger right now!”

(The pharmacists rush into action. One leads me to a chair and brings me water while the other one starts using the phone.)

Pharmacist: “Okay, I just talked to the hospital and found out what’s wrong. You need to go to [Address] Square, not [Address] Street. It is about 200 meters down the road. They can help you. Come by after and let us know you were taken care of, sweetie!”

(I finally find the right building. The nurses of the ward won’t talk in English, but with the help of my papers they find me a doctor. He is amazing; he even types up my medical papers twice, one time in Hungarian and one time in English. He even allows me to come back to the ENT-ward the next week for my checkup, so I will not have to go through that trouble again. I go back to the pharmacy to get my meds and the pharmacists hug me and tell me to go home and rest. Sadly, that is not the end of the story. I feel way better after a while. Next Friday I return to the ward for my checkup 20 minutes after they open. I hand the nurses the papers the last doctor gave me, but they seem confused. My translator app message, “Hello, I am here for my checkup with [Doctor]!” is ignored again. A man in scrubs notices me.)

Man: “Can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, I was here last week, [Doctor] told me to come back for my checkup.”

(He talks to the nurses and turns back to me.)

Man: “Someone will be with you in a minute.”

(I sit down in front of the window of the cubicle the nurses sit in and start reading a book. I am in plain sight all the time. I eventually even finish my book. More than two hours have passed. Further communication with the nurses seems futile and I am considering what to do when the man from before comes around the corner again. He sees me, turns red, and starts shouting at the nurses in Hungarian.)

Man: “I am so sorry; a doctor will be with you in a second.”

(As it turns out, that man was the chief resident. My doctor from my last visit had been called out of the ward and the nurses were supposed to tell a different doctor to see to my checkup, but they did not. The other doctor was there in two minutes. I know that I cannot expect all locals to understand English when I am the foreigner in a country whose language I do not speak. But even if you do not have a common language, try to help. Get someone to translate, try to use translator apps, or even use hand movements. But please, do not just ignore a crying girl that is asking for your help!)

[florida80]

Acting Narcotic Robotic

North Carolina, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | December 5, 2017


(I have an invisible chronic illness, Chronic Pancreatitis, that was caused by complications from gallbladder surgery a few years back. I am on tons of medication on a daily basis just so I can function normally and work a demanding full-time job. One of these medications is a narcotic; because of the multitudes who abuse it, a lot of judgement is passed on those who legitimately need it.)

Me: “Hi there! Just need to get this filled.”

(I hand my prescription over to a pharmacist that I don’t recognize. These prescriptions are very specific for when you can fill them, and are dated accordingly. Everything on mine is legit, as I literally just left the doctor’s office.)

Pharmacist: *takes a long time to look at it, and keeps looking back up at me* “Are you sure it’s time to fill this again?”

Me: “Um… Well, yeah. I just picked that up from my doctor, and the fill date is listed. You can also check your system, because this is the only pharmacy I use.”

(The pharmacist gives me a weird look and says it’ll be ten minutes, so I go sit down to wait. A few minutes later I hear her on the phone, and I don’t really pay any attention until I hear her say my name. Turns out she is calling my doctor’s office to verify it, the whole time shooting nasty sideways looks at me. Okay, totally fine; I know they have to be careful and check these things, so I brush it off. A couple minutes later when I walk up to the counter to pick it up:)

Pharmacist: “You know, this stuff is really bad for you. You shouldn’t be taking this.”

Me: *stunned* “Well, it helps me stay upright so I can work. Haha.”

Pharmacist: “My sister was on this and it was horrible. I would have to tell her all the time about how bad it was and that she had to get off of it, and she was addicted. It was really bad and she had such a hard time. You shouldn’t be taking this!”

Me: “Well, I’m going to let my doctor decide that. Can I check out now, please?”

(I understand how many people get hooked on narcotics, and the rising epidemic in this country, but they do have benefits that people like myself need. I don’t even think this lady was worried about the bigger social issue; I think she just got it into her head that it was a horrible medication from her bad experience with her sister. I’m sorry, lady; you are a pharmacist who should know better, and until you gain your medical doctorate and start practicing gastroenterology, keep your opinions about my treatment to yourself!)

[florida80]

Will Be Getting Ribbed About That Forever

Health & Body, Medical Center, Physical, The Netherlands | Healthy | December 5, 2017


(My uncle has some work-related back pains for which his GP refers him to a physical therapist. The therapy he needs is pretty painful, so when he comes home from a session one day saying the therapist has gotten him good, his wife — my aunt — thinks nothing of it and goes out running errands. When she gets home after a few hours and calls to my uncle to help her with the groceries, she notices he’s moving very carefully, wincing, and not breathing well. When she asks what’s wrong, my uncle tells her his ribs on one side have been hurting bad since therapy, and it isn’t getting better despite taking some painkillers. My aunt gently prods his ribs, eliciting a yelp. Knowing my uncle is pretty tough, my aunt gets worried and pulls up his shirt, uncovering a HUGE blossoming bruise on one side of his back. My aunt freaks out and orders my uncle to get in the car NOW because they’re going to the hospital. On the way there, she gives my uncle the third degree: What did he do? Did he fall? Did he get into a fight? What is he hiding from her? My uncle swears nothing happened; he went to therapy and came back, his ribs have been hurting since, and that’s that. The doctor at the hospital takes one look at the bruise and orders an x-ray, which reveals several BROKEN ribs. The doctor also interrogates my uncle, but gets the same response: all he did was go to physical therapy for his back pains.)

ER Doctor: “Did the therapist work on your ribs as well?”

Uncle: “Well, yes. Wait, are you saying…?”

ER Doctor: “That you should get a different therapist? Yes.”

(My uncle made a full recovery and got a different therapist who cured his back pains. The therapist who broke his ribs is still in practice and also coaches a youth sports team. I was on that team for several years and now hate sports. The guy received a Royal Ribbon for his investment in youth sports.)

[florida80]

That’s One Ticked Off Dog

Illinois, Non-Dialogue, USA, Vet | Healthy | December 5, 2017


I was working the other day when a client called in frantically about her dog having a tick on it’s leg. I asked the doctor if we had time to fit her in and he agreed to see the dog.

The client arrives on time and we get her and her dog into an examination room. I happen to overhear her telling the vet that she had tried burning the tick off, tweezing it, and pulling it off.

The doctor looked at it for a few moments, looked up, and said, “Ma’am, this is a mole.”

[florida80]

Not Insured Against Bad Attitudes

Medical Office, USA, Virginia | Healthy | December 4, 2017


(I am currently working front desk at a private practice doctor’s office. I answer phones, schedule patients, do referrals, etc. This exchange occurs over the phone.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Doctor]’s office. My name is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Patient: *with a snarky attitude* ”My name is [Patient] and I need to know if my medication has been approved by my insurance.”

(Sometimes certain medications need a prior authorization in order for the pharmacy to dispense the med. I tell the woman no problem and get her info so I can pull up her chart.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, it looks like it’s still being processed right now.”

Patient: *with even nastier attitude* “This is ridiculous. I need my medication.”

(I then look to see what medication she is talking about and it turns out it’s Zantac. This is an over-the-counter medicine that you can buy at any grocery or drug store.)

Me: “I’m sorry about that, ma’am, but PAs can take anywhere from one to six weeks. Sometimes medications that can be purchased over-the-counter take longer.”

Patient: *yelling* “I KNOW IT’S OVER THE COUNTER BUT I WILL NOT SPEND MONEY WHEN I CAN GET MY INSURANCE TO PAY FOR IT! I NEED MY MEDICATION NOW AND YOU BETTER DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS.”

(I then forwarded the call to the doctor’s nurse who informed her that she would get to it as soon as possible, but since the patient’s medication was available over-the-counter, she has to work on the others that aren’t. She also gave her a list of stores and other medications that will help her problem if she needs it immediately. Seriously, just go to the store and get some.)

[florida80]

When Your Biggest Headache Is The Doctor

Hospital, Ohio, USA | Healthy | December 4, 2017


(I have chronic, crippling migraines. Sometimes I have to go the ER for a shot. On one such visit, the doctor came in, saw me in my floppy hat and sunglasses, and says:)

Doctor: “Don’t you think that’s a little ridiculous?”

(The migraine has my brain muddled. All I can say is:)

Me: “What?”

(He went into a rather long rant about the dark room, my hat, and my sunglasses. Then he left the room.)

Me: *to my husband* “What just happened?”

Husband: “I don’t know. He’s doing something at the desk now.”

(The doctor returned after about twenty minutes.)

Doctor: “I just checked your record. You’ve been here seventeen times in the last month.”

Me: “No. I haven’t been here for two months at least.”

Doctor: “Don’t lie. I saw the record. It’s obvious you just want the drugs.”

(He continued berating me for being a drug-seeker until I was crying hard. Then, he told me to get out. I had a physical therapy appointment two days later. After what the ER doctor had said to me, I was nervous about interacting with people, but finally got the courage to ask:)

Me: “When someone checks my record on the computer can they see what a visit was for?”

Therapist: “What do you mean?”

Me: “I was in the ER a couple of days ago. The doctor looked at my record and accused of making seventeen visits to the ER seeking drugs. The only thing at [Medical Complex] that I’ve used recently was my physical therapy. Doesn’t my record say what the visits were for?”

Therapist: *in shock* “Yes! It will definitely say if it was physical therapy, your doctor, or the ER.”

(Then, she showed me my record on the computer with physical therapy listed eighteen times, including that day’s visit. I didn’t tell her how bad the ER doc made me feel or how sick I was before the migraine went away on its own, but she decided to report him anyway. It must have been the final straw because when I had to go to the ER about four months later I discovered that doctor had been fired.)

[florida80]

Getting Hysterical-ectomy

Maryland, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | December 4, 2017


(I am a lesbian, and I occasionally experience extremely severe symptoms when on my period, for up to 5 days, such as a complete inability to eat without vomiting, severe pain, and on a couple occasions, seizures. After talking it over with my wife, I decide to go in to speak to my gynecologist and ask her about how to go about getting a hysterectomy. The trouble starts right from when I attempt to book an appointment. After getting through hold and basic introductions.)

Me: “I would like to schedule a consultation with [Doctor] about having a hysterectomy.”

Receptionist: “Okay! Just so you know, if you have a hysterectomy, you won’t be able to have children afterwards!”

Me: “I know. That’s fine.”

(The receptionist then schedules the consultation without any more fuss. On the day of the appointment, I arrive with my wife so that we can both talk to the gynecologist.)

Doctor: “I don’t think that this is a bad idea given your symptoms, but you need to understand that if you go through with this you will never, ever be able to have babies. There is no way to undo it if you decide you want kids.”

Me: “I know. That’s fine.”

Doctor: “We could schedule it a year or two out so you could have one last baby before your surgery.”

Me: “I have never had children.”

Doctor: “So you want to wait—”

Me: “Shut up and listen to me. I am gay. The only penises that ever go inside me are made of plastic. I will not be having children either way. I don’t care. We can adopt. [Wife] could have artificial insemination. It doesn’t matter.”

Doctor: “If you say so…”

(My gynecologist continued to flare at me and mention children several times, and even tried to show me pictures of her own kids, while she was recommending surgeons to me and helping me schedule with one of them. With the surgeon, he also listed all the possible side effects, but a simple “I understand” was all it took to convince him, luckily.)

[florida80]

Getting Hysterical-ectomy

Maryland, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | December 4, 2017


(I am a lesbian, and I occasionally experience extremely severe symptoms when on my period, for up to 5 days, such as a complete inability to eat without vomiting, severe pain, and on a couple occasions, seizures. After talking it over with my wife, I decide to go in to speak to my gynecologist and ask her about how to go about getting a hysterectomy. The trouble starts right from when I attempt to book an appointment. After getting through hold and basic introductions.)

Me: “I would like to schedule a consultation with [Doctor] about having a hysterectomy.”

Receptionist: “Okay! Just so you know, if you have a hysterectomy, you won’t be able to have children afterwards!”

Me: “I know. That’s fine.”

(The receptionist then schedules the consultation without any more fuss. On the day of the appointment, I arrive with my wife so that we can both talk to the gynecologist.)

Doctor: “I don’t think that this is a bad idea given your symptoms, but you need to understand that if you go through with this you will never, ever be able to have babies. There is no way to undo it if you decide you want kids.”

Me: “I know. That’s fine.”

Doctor: “We could schedule it a year or two out so you could have one last baby before your surgery.”

Me: “I have never had children.”

Doctor: “So you want to wait—”

Me: “Shut up and listen to me. I am gay. The only penises that ever go inside me are made of plastic. I will not be having children either way. I don’t care. We can adopt. [Wife] could have artificial insemination. It doesn’t matter.”

Doctor: “If you say so…”

(My gynecologist continued to flare at me and mention children several times, and even tried to show me pictures of her own kids, while she was recommending surgeons to me and helping me schedule with one of them. With the surgeon, he also listed all the possible side effects, but a simple “I understand” was all it took to convince him, luckily.)

[florida80]

Discharging Hard Truths

Hospital, Non-Dialogue, Ohio, USA | Healthy | December 3, 2017


I was in an ER cubicle patiently waiting for a doctor to be free to treat my migraine, which is considered low-priority in triage. It was a very busy night, but amazingly quiet so my headache wasn’t exacerbated by sounds. And then, HE arrived in an ambulance.

We were able to hear that he had gotten drunk, climbed onto the bar’s roof, and fallen through a skylight.

Though he was at least 40 yards from me, his continual yells were overwhelming, causing me pain, confusion, and dizziness. Because of that, I couldn’t understand most of what he yelled, but did manage to hear him demanding more alcoholic drinks and trying to get out of bed, and that they had to restrain him.

By the time a doctor went to examine him, I was crying from pain and at the end of my ability to cope. The doctor began talking to the drunk: “And what’s going on with you tonight?”

I snapped and yelled, “HE’S DRUNK AND STUPID!”

The entire ward went silent and then we heard giggles. The doctor bustled into my cubicle, followed in minutes by a nurse with a syringe.

Within fifteen minutes of my outburst, I had been medicated and discharged

[florida80]

Let’s Not Split Hairs About Who It Is For

Medical Office, Non-Dialogue, Ohio, USA | Healthy | December 2, 2017


Because of family history, I need a specific medical test every five years. My husband always accompanies me to the pre-test appointments. The doctor is mostly bald and does not like jokes about it.

Please note that my husband has been balding for quite a few years. A few years before this appointment, I had made my husband a baseball hat, which said, “Wish you were hair.” I hadn’t realized he was wearing it.

The doctor took one look at the hat, got a sour face, and said, “Is that meant for me?”

At first we were too startled to say anything. Then my husband removed his hat to show his own balding head. He and I burst out laughing. After his own startled pause, the doctor joined in.

[florida80]

Thyroid Void

Medical Office, USA | Healthy | December 1, 2017


(I have hypothyroidism, which has been successfully controlled with medication for several years. Over a couple months, however, I notice that some of my symptoms are returning. I call my doctor, and she says she will do a blood test. I go to her office for the results.)

Doctor: “Okay, so your thyroid level is at 4.9.”

(The maximum is five.)

Me: “Well, no wonder I’ve been feeling sick! That’s very high.”

Doctor: “Oh, no. You’re fine. Five is the top of the normal range. You’re still under that.”

Me: “But a lot of my old symptoms are coming back. I can’t sleep at night, I’m tired during the day, I’m freezing cold all the time—”

Doctor: “You’re under stress. It’s normal.”

Me: “I HAVE GAINED 20 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS!”

Doctor: “Well, you just need to go on a diet.”

Me: “I exercise five days a week, and I eat my fruits and veggies! I don’t feel like myself. I know my body, and I need a medication change!”

Doctor: “Well, I’m not giving you one, because you’re normal.”

(She tells me to exercise more and gives me a vitamin supplement. I fume, but take it. A couple months later, I move to a different state. I go in for an appointment with my new doctor.)

New Doctor: “I’ve been reviewing your test results from your previous doctor, and I noticed your thyroid is at 4.9. That’s very high. Are you feeling okay at that number?”

Me: “Not at all! I tried to tell her, but she wouldn’t listen. She kept saying it was normal.”

New Doctor: “I’m not surprised. Older guidelines allow it to get that high, but I’ve found that my patients feel better when their thyroid is at three or under. I’m going to order some more blood work.”

(The new blood test shows that my number skyrocketed to a six. My new doctor changes my medication immediately. It takes a year and three medicine changes to get it right. It turned out that my thyroid number had been creeping up for a couple years, and my old doctor had just ignored it. I’m happy to report that I’m much better now!)

[florida80]

It Takes More Than Money To Clear A Bill

Columbia, Medical Office, South Carolina, USA | Healthy | December 1, 2017


(I get about a $3,000 bill from a doctor I had seen several months prior. I am confused because I know my insurance had paid it. I call the billing dept. but get no answer and leave a message. I forget about it until the next month when the bill comes again. Once again, I call, leave a message, and forget about it. Then I get a letter threatening to send me to a collection agency. I call my insurance company to double check. They tell me that not only have they paid it, but had a duplicate charge under a different account number that was of course denied. I start calling every other day. The office phones aren’t open until 10 am and they shut them down at 3:30 pm. I either get a recording and leave a message or the receptionist tells me everyone is in a meeting. This goes on for over three weeks. Then I get another threatening letter. I even go to the office in person but am told everyone is in a meeting and no one can talk to me. At this point I have had it. I wait until 10 pm at night. I call and get the voicemail system. When it says press “1” for nurse, I do so and leave a detailed, angry message that NO ONE will return my calls, I am being threatened with being sent to a collection agency for a bill that was paid, and someone better call me back or I am filing fraud charges with the insurance company and talking to a lawyer. I hang up and call back and do it again after pressing a number for a different department. I go through the entire employee directory. I do this for almost two hours and leave dozens of messages on EVERY SINGLE EMPLOYEE’S voicemail. I then call the doctor’s emergency after-hours line and leave the same message there. The next morning, at 10:01, I call the office. The receptionist recognizes my voice.)

Receptionist: “Yes, ma’am, I have the office manager here for you” *transfers me*

Manager: “Good morning, Mrs. [My Name]. I was just about to call you.”

Me: “Yeah, I bet you were.”

Manager: *sheepishly* “Yeah, everyone is talking about the messages you left, especially the doctor.”

Me: “Well, it’s not like you left me much choice.”

(She apologizes and explains. The guy who was handling the bills was creating fake patient accounts and double billing the insurance companies. Most didn’t catch it, paid the doctor, and then the guy stole the money. They fired him but have such a paperwork mess to clean up and had to gather the evidence to convict him that they didn’t have time to call the patients.)

Me: “I understand, but that is no excuse. You are sending me letters threatening to send me to a collection agency.”

Manager: “What?! Crap, the computers are printing those out automatically. We didn’t know any had been mailed out.”

Me: “Yeah, well they are and you better start answering these calls because you have some very peeved off patients who, like me, are calling lawyers.”

(She apologized again and told me that my account had been cleared up. I wonder, though, about all the others who just kept calling and getting nowhere.)

[florida80]

A Relaxed Attitude To Drugs

England, Hospital, UK | Healthy | December 1, 2017


(I am a medical student. This is my first ever interaction in a hospital setting. The patient has been admitted for a serious lung issue, and is due to return home. It proceeds well, until it is time to round off the conversation:)

Me: “So, I’ve been told you’re being discharged today; is that correct?”

Patient: “Yes, that’s right. I’m going to go and see my friend when I get out. She’s really stressed.”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you have anything nice planned?”

Patient: “We’re going to bake some weed brownies. That should help us relax!” *laughs*

Me: “Well, at least you’re not smoking it!” *nervous laughter*

(Interesting start to medicine. I’m glad she took my comment well. I just wasn’t expecting it!)

[florida80]

Going Toe-To-Toe With The GP

Medical Office, Oklahoma, Tulsa, USA | Healthy | November 30, 2017


(I have a horrible ingrown toenail. My GP determines that surgery is necessary. He is right, as after half of it is cut away, I still have a normal toenail remaining. The surgery is done under general anesthesia, a move I thought was overkill, but it is a success. Some years later I am seeing a podiatrist about the same problem with the other foot and the doctor concludes the same treatment. I tell him about the first surgery.)

Doctor: “They gave you general anesthesia? That’s ridiculous. Was it a GP?”

Me: “I thought it was extreme. Yes, he was my GP.”

Doctor: “Figures. GP’s don’t know how to anesthetize a toe. Okay, let’s get this taken care of today.”

(He sets me up for surgery, sticks a needle in the base of my toe and injects me. After a bit he uses something pointy to test my toe.)

Doctor: “There, you shouldn’t be feeling anything.”

Me: “I can feel that quite easily. Try again.” *I look away so he knows I’m no cheating by watching* “Yeah, I can still feel it.”

Doctor: “Hmm. Let’s get you some more anesthesia.”

(After a bit, it’s still not numb. I’m suddenly feeling a great lack of confidence after hearing his short diatribe about GPs.)

Doctor: “Well, on a few rare individuals, the main nerve for that part of the toe runs up the wrong side of the toe. Let me see if that’s it.”

(Lucky for him (and me) that turned out to be exactly the case. I still get a wry grin thinking about him complaining that another doctor couldn’t just numb my toe.)

[florida80]

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Expecting A Faint Chance

Hospital, Israel, Tel Aviv | Healthy | November 30, 2017


(I recently fractured my wrist and hand in a bad fall. I am seeing my doctor and a follow-up appointment. Due to being unable to drive myself, my boyfriend drives me and stays while they draw blood. It’s important to note I’m only 1.60 m and he is a large man, over 2 m tall.)

Doctor: “Well, the results look good, no infections, and the x-rays show your hand and wrist are healing well. Oh, and congratulations.”

Me: “For being clumsy? Or having good bones?”

Doctor: “No… congratulations.”

Boyfriend: “For what?”

Doctor: “You’re expecting, or did you not know?”

Me: “Expecting what?”

Doctor: “A baby. You’re pregnant. We ran the results twice. You’re going to have a baby.”

(While I tried to process being pregnant, my boyfriend stood up, then promptly fainted, landing face first on the floor and leaving a nasty bruise on his forehead. Now we have a great story to tell our future child about how their big, strong father fainted when he heard the news!)

[florida80]

Truly Acting The Part

College & University, England, UK | Healthy | November 30, 2017


(I am a paramedic student. As part of my training, we run simulated scenarios with one, two, or four students and actor(s) to be the patient (and bystanders). We have a scenario where I and another student have to respond to a man who has attempted suicide and slit both his wrists. While we’re treating him I drop a bandage and a few members of my class giggle. The actor, being the little legend he is, responds by saying:)

Actor: “All those people are laughing at me.”

(I had to struggle not to laugh while my partner, a seasoned EMT who is getting her UK cert, reassured him that he was just seeing things.)

[florida80]

Anti-Antibiotics

Massachusetts, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | November 29, 2017


(I have a mild immune deficiency. This makes me highly susceptible to severe sinus infections. This also means that only antibiotics administered within the first week of symptoms will quickly cure my sinus infections. Anything else does nothing and it will take several months for my immune system to fight off the infection. This is well-documented.)

Doctor: “It seems your daughter’s infections are chronic. I’m going to prescribe your daughter [Medication that relies on and boosts the immune cells already present] and ask that you check back to tell me if it helped.”

Mom: “No. You have prescribed my daughter this medication and those like it before and it does nothing. She needs antibiotics.”

Doctor: “Can you try this medication for a few days? We ought not to jump right to antibiotics.”

Mom: “This is another thing you have told us to do that we have tried. No, it does not help at all.”

Doctor: “You cannot just press me for antibiotics! They’re not good for long-term health.”

Mom: “Listen to me. I know that you think I am one of those parents who just demands that doctors give my kid antibiotics for every little sniffle. I am not. I am insisting on antibiotics because they are the only thing that will stop my daughter from having to go through months of misery, pain, and exhaustion from sinus infections! This is not an exaggeration; it really does take that long. And your immune booster medication does not help much because hers is too compromised for the effect to make a difference! I would love to go through the documentation proving all of this, if you require it. But I am absolutely not leaving here having wasted my daughter’s and my time to go spend my money on a medication that will not help her avoid a long term and awful illness.”

Doctor: “Oh. Um… I have to step out for a bit. Um… you really shouldn’t over-rely on antibiotics. Be careful.”

Mom: *shoots [Doctor] a death glare*

(Fortunately, this was enough to get [Doctor] to prescribe me antibiotics. Sure enough, I was ready to go back to school by the next day and was totally free of infection after three days. My mom soon requested to never see that doctor again, which was honored. Since being guaranteed to get the medication I need as soon as possible, I have not needed to take antibiotics often and also get sick much less than before.)

[florida80]

Symptoms May Include Death And Sarcasm

Clinic, Russia, Sarcasm, St. Petersburg | Healthy | November 29, 2017


(Back in college I spent a summer living in Russia. Midway through my stay I came down with strep throat. This is the first time I’ve had it since I was a kid, when I got it yearly. My program director takes me to a clinic that specializes in treating foreigners. After diagnosing me, the doctor comes back into my room with a pile of medication, none of which I recognize. Since I take other medications, I ask him if there are drug interactions I should be aware of. He proceeds to take the paper inserts out of every box he has and read them. After a few minutes he looks up and says:)

Doctor: “I don’t know; if the reaction is bad, stop taking them?”

Me: “Great. So, if I die, I’ll stop taking them.”

(Thankfully I never had a reaction but I still have no idea what it was that he gave me. Bonus? My host mother was convinced I got sick from drinking cold beverages in the hot weather.)

[florida80]

Got More Than A Chip On Your Shoulder

Dentist, Maryland, USA | Healthy | November 29, 2017


(I go to my routine semi-annual dental check-up, and tell my dentist that I think I have chipped a molar, as there is a rough patch on my tooth that keeps catching my tongue, causing it to blister and bleed on a regular basis.)

Dentist: “Oh, yes, there is a small chip.”

Me: “Can we get it fixed?”

Dentist: “Insurance won’t cover the procedure as it’s ‘cosmetic.’”

Me: “It’s literally causing my tongue to bleed. This chip is painful, and it’s actually causing injury to me. I think it’s more than cosmetic.”

Dentist: “Oh, you’ll be fine. Just don’t play with it.”

(This went on for months. I kept asking him to fix the chip, and he kept refusing. I also got opinions from other dentists that said the chip needed to be filled, but my dentist still refused. Ultimately I switched to a new dentist due to a change in insurance; the new dentist took one look at the chip and had me scheduled for an appointment to get it filled a few days later.)

New Dentist: “Yeah, let’s get this taken care of; you shouldn’t have to suffer with this chip causing you pain and open sores. Plus, it’s deep enough that your dentin is exposed. If we leave this open any longer, your whole tooth would be in danger of forming an abscess, which would need a root canal to fix.”

Me: *in shocked disbelief* “My tooth could have rotted away from the inside out because my old dentist couldn’t be bothered to give me a filling the size of a pin-head?!”

New Dentist: “Yep.”

[florida80]

Cancer Is A Crime

California, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | November 28, 2017


(I’ve been diagnosed with cancer and am on numerous medications, including morphine and oxycodone for the pain I am in. I’m pretty skinny and pale and not looking healthy after six months of chemotherapy. I go to my normal pharmacy with my paper prescription to get filled and a new pharmacy tech, or at least one I’ve never seen in the six months I’ve frequented this place, greets me. I hand him my paperwork, and he starts to type in into his computer, and then looks at me and says:)

Pharmacy Tech: “I see you’ve been getting these pills for a few months now, and you’re refilling them on the same date every month. You can’t fill this if you’re just going to sell them on the street for your drug money.”

(My jaw drops, and he hands my prescription back to me.)

Pharmacy Tech: “I’m calling the police now, sir, so don’t run off.”

(He then goes to the phone and starts dialing. The pharmacist sees me through their little window and waves at me, I see her a lot when I’m there and she’s helped consult me on the timing of taking my meds so I don’t make myself sick. I wave her over.)

Pharmacist: “Hi!”

Me: “You may want to talk to your new guy. He’s calling the cops on me.”

(She turns around and sees him on the phone.)

Pharmacist: “What are you doing?”

Pharmacy Tech: *covers the receiver* “This junkie is trying to get pills to sell. I’m calling the cops.”

(She rips the phone out of his hand and yells at him.)

Pharmacist: “He has cancer, you idiot!”

(He went pale. She sent him away and hung up the phone. I got my refills, and I never saw that guy again.)

[florida80]

Digger-ing Yourself Into A Hole

Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | November 28, 2017


(I am at the pharmacy to pick up a prescription that was called in.)

Tech: “Can I help you?”

Me: “I need to pick up for [Last Name].”

Tech: *types into computer* “First name?”

Me: “Digger.”

Tech: “Digger?”

Me: “Yes.”

(The tech give me a funny look and goes into the back. He returns with the medicine in hand.)

Tech: “So, you can’t drive while taking this. Also, you cannot drink alcohol while taking this. I will need you to sign saying you understand those restrictions.”

Me: *laughing* “No problem.”

Tech: “I need a date of birth.”

Me: “October 2015. I don’t know the day.”

Tech: “You don’t know your child’s birthdate?”

Me: “It’s not my child.”

Tech: “I’m not going to be able to fill this.”

Me: “I need the pharmacist. Now.”

(The pharmacist comes out and asks what the problem is.)

Tech: “She’s picking up this medicine but she doesn’t know the birthdate and then she says it isn’t her child.”

Pharmacist: *takes bag and reads label* “Look at this name.”

(The tech looks and still doesn’t seem to understand.)

Pharmacist: “The patient is named Digger K9 [Last Name]. That means it’s for her dog. Lots of people don’t know their dog’s birthday.”

Tech: “How was I supposed to know?”

Pharmacist: “I’ll finish this. Go wait in the office for me.”

(When I went to get his refill, the same tech handled the transaction. He commented that it was a really big dose for a toddler. Pretty sure whatever the pharmacist said — it didn’t help.)

[florida80]

You Suck(tion)!

Clinic, North Carolina, USA | Healthy | November 28, 2017


(I have a rare disease for which I have to have blood work done every few months. I always get it done at the local health department because I don’t have insurance and labs are too expensive elsewhere. They used to have a phlebotomist on staff who was quite good at her job, but she retired around a year before this incident. After she retired, for a while, my tests were done by whichever nurse happened to be available. On this day, one of the nurses who has drawn my blood a few times before is training a different nurse on lab procedures, so the trainee nurse is actually the one doing the draw. I’m often a problematic draw because my veins are small, and sometimes my blood doesn’t come out. This happens after several other mishaps, including the trainee nurse not noticing all of the tests I need to have done, having to remind both of them that one of my samples has to be frozen, and the trainee nurse failing to draw from my left arm and having to try my right arm instead. As the trainee nurse is drawing my blood, she’s pulling up on the needle in a way that makes it hurt like h***, but I’m kind of used to it, so I’m just responding to the talkative trainer nurse and not looking at my arm. Finally the trainee nurse finishes filling the last vial and removes the needle. Something feels a little odd, so I look down to see blood POURING from my arm. I’ve been getting labs done regularly for about 13 years at this point, and I’ve never seen anything like that, so I’m a bit alarmed.)

Me: “What the h***?!

Trainee Nurse: “…”

Trainer Nurse: “Oh! *to trainee nurse* “Looks like you broke the suction…” *to me* “Uh, she broke the suction… But that’s okay! It’s perfectly fine, just looks bad. Don’t worry!”

Me: “Uh…”

Trainee Nurse: “It happens sometimes.”

Me: “That has NEVER happened to me before. But okay, sure.”

(That’s not something that just “happens sometimes”; that’s something you DO.)

[florida80]

Extra Nerve-ous

Costa Rica, Dentist | Healthy | November 27, 2017


(I’m deadly afraid of dentists, but one day I finally get the courage to go see one for a routine check up. They tell me I need to get my wisdom teeth removed and we set up an appointment.)

Me: “Please be patient.”

Dentist: “This will not hurt at all in a few minutes, after the anaesthetic kicks off.”

(He gives me three injections. A few minutes later he pokes me with an instrument.)

Me: “Aaaah!”

Dentist: “Okay, more anaesthetic.”

(He gives me another injection, waits a few more minutes, then pokes me with an instrument.)

Me: “OUCH, OUCH, OUCH!”

Dentist: “Don’t lie; it doesn’t hurt.”

Me: “Please, I swear it does.”

Dentist: “I can’t give you any more anaesthetic. Go home and come back next week. Take a valium.”

(One week and one valium later:)

Dentist: “I gave you all the anaesthetic I can. Stop crying for nothing.”

(In extreme pain, I manage to get to the opening of the area around the tooth, then he begins pulling.)

Me: “No more! Please stop!”

Dentist: “Just a bit more. Let me pull some more. It doesn’t hurt.”

Me: *refusing to open my mouth any more* “No.”

(The dentist even called my mom, and she screamed at me to stop being a wuss. Still, I refused to get anything else and he was forced to close the gap and let me go. He was kind enough to recommend another dentist with access to morphine. Thankfully the new dentist thought that my problem was probably that I had an extra nerve around that area. He gave me a normal anaesthetic where he thought it was and took out the tooth without so much as a peep from me. The lesson is: trust yourself.)

[florida80]

Insulin And Out

Hospital, UK | Healthy | November 27, 2017


(I have been admitted to hospital for fainting spells. I am also diabetic and use injections. I am currently on my period, and for whatever reason I tend to bruise more often from the injections during this time.)

Nurse: *coming in while I’m getting changed* “Okay, this shouldn’t take very long. At most you should be— What are those?”

Me: “What are what?”

Nurse: *now angry and pointing at my thighs* “THOSE!”

Me: “Bruises, from insulin injections.”

(It looks like she doesn’t believe me as she turns and leaves. I have an MRI and CT scan, and now they need to do some blood tests. I am given some forms, which have already been filled out, but I’m asked to check to see if there is anything that has been missed. After the blood has been taken, a new medical officer comes in with my forms.)

Medical Officer: “Are you all right, dear? We just need to make sure everything is right before we do the tests.”

Me: “I already checked them and they’re fine.”

Medical Officer: “Yes, but we need more than just the medication you have been prescribed. We also need other drugs you may have taken recently.”

Me: “Again, already on the form.”

Medical Officer: “Any not-necessarily-legal drugs.”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Medical Officer: “I may as well be open. Now, there’s no need to be ashamed, but we really need to know what drugs you are addicted to, and for how long. They could be what is causing your condition.”

Me: “I’m not on anything like that. What is this– Oh. Have any of the nurses spoken to you about my legs?”

Medical Officer: “There was an observation made that you use your legs for the injection site, yes.”

Me: “And did they also tell you that I’m diabetic as well, and that’s where I administer my insulin?” *shows her my legs*

Medical Officer: *doubtful* “That’s a lot of bruising for mere insulin injections.”

Me: “If I had been admitted a week ago, they wouldn’t be there. I’m on my period, and my injections always cause bruising while I’m on my period.”

(She still looks doubtful, but leaves me in peace. I’m really shook up by it and despite these two being the only people who think I’m a drug addict, I opt to leave and be seen elsewhere. I never find out the cause of my fainting, but it disappears within a month. Six months later, I’m back at said hospital for retinal screening. Lo and behold, the woman who sees me is the second one mentioned above. She recognises me.)

Medical Officer: “Oh, small world. How have you—”

Me: *lifting my skirt* “Do you see any bruises now? Do I look like a junkie now?”

Medical Officer: *blushing* “Oh, umm. No. I’m sorry about jumping to—”

Me: “Just save it. If you’ve been given this responsibility, after how you treated me, you can stuff it!”

(I then left and arranged to have all future screening done at a hospital nearly an hour away. It really makes you wonder why these two women, out of all the people who saw me that day, believed I was a drug addict because of bruising on one of the most common areas diabetics inject.)

[florida80]

Calibrations Always Go Up And Down

Hospital, USA, Utah | Healthy | November 27, 2017


(It’s the night shift in the hospital lab. I’m the scientist doing the nightly calibrating of our analyzers’ drug screen when the ER requests a drug screen, which I can’t run until I finish my calibrations; once I start, I can’t stop. We tell them it will be done as soon as possible, and we’ll rush the sample, which they’re okay with. Meanwhile, some plumbers are working on one of our sinks. The lead scientist comes to my bench to check on my progress and get a better ETA to tell the doctors.)

Lead Scientist: “How’s it coming over here?”

Me: “I’m almost ready. I just need to do cocaine and marijuana.”

Lead Scientist: *without missing a beat* “[My Name], you know better than to mix uppers and downers.”

(The plumbers all went silent and turned to look at us. I hope they didn’t think we were actually doing drugs.)

[florida80]

Something Doesn’t Clicky

Hospital, UK | Healthy | November 26, 2017


(I am fifteen and fortunate enough to be able to attend the birth of my baby sister with my dad. This takes place only an hour after she is born.)

Doctor: “Now, Mrs. [Mum], is it all right if a student doctor does the examination on your baby?”

Mum: “Yes, of course; they have to practice!”

Doctor: “[Student]! You can come in now!

Student: *examines my baby sister and then looks worried* “I’m going to refer [Sister] here. She is exhibiting signs of clicky hips.”

Mum: “Should we be worried? [My Name] didn’t have any of that. Is it going to affect her as she gets older?!”

Student: “It’s likely she’ll just have a little fabric harness. It’s easily corrected.”

(Two weeks later we are sitting in a clinic room in the hospital waiting for the doctor. My mum sits next to a lady with a toddler and a baby not much older than my sister.)

Lady: “Hello, why are you here?”

Mum: “We’ve been referred. Apparently, [Sister] has clicky hips.”

Lady: *looks surprised* “Same here! Did you have [Student] examine her?”

Mum: “Yes, that was him!”

Lady: “I’ve talked to three other ladies who’ve been referred, and each of their babies have absolutely nothing wrong. I’m betting it’s the same for our two!”

(It turned out the student had referred about twenty mothers over the two days he’d been in the department, and none of their babies had clicky hips!)

[florida80]

Has To Be Some Kind Of Record

Hospital, USA, Wisconsin | Healthy | November 25, 2017


Customer: “I need my birth record in order to request a new Social Security card, because I don’t have a copy of my birth certificate.”

(This is a fairly common request, so I nod as I look over his Release of Information to make sure all the fields have been completed. Before I get to the end, he adds:)

Customer: “I wasn’t actually born at this hospital. Does that matter?”

(Yes, it matters. He left empty-handed.)

[florida80]

County The Ways

California, Clinic, USA | Healthy | November 24, 2017


(I work for a non-profit medical clinic. Because the county we operate in provides a pretty broad range of services, we have a lot of patients who labor under the belief that we are associated with the county. We are not and never have been. I overhear my colleague who is working the front desk engaging with a patient.)

Patient: “So you’re part of the county, right?”

Colleague: “No, we are in no way associated with the county.”

Patient: “Oh, so you contract with them?”

Colleague: “No. We are not contracted by, subcontract with, or in any way work for or answer to the county.”

Patient: “So, you’re subcontracted with the county.”

Colleague: “No, we are not. We are in no way, shape, or form any part of the county services.”

Patient: *sounding confused* “Oh.”

(A moment later.)

Patient: “So can you send [paperwork] through this fax machine?” *gestures at printer*

Colleague: “That isn’t a fax machine.”

Patient: “Can you fax it from here?”

Colleague: “No, we do not have a fax machine here.”

Patient: *confused* “Oh.”

(After the patient has been called in to see the provider.)

Me: *to Colleague, teasing* “So hey, [Colleague], aren’t we part of the county?”

Colleague: *throws hands in the air* “Apparently!”

Me: “Someone should tell [Boss]. He won’t have to worry about that [specific] grant anymore!”

[florida80]

Millennial Problems Don’t Have Legs To Stand On

Grocery Store, Ohio, USA | Healthy | November 24, 2017


(I’m 20, and I use a wheelchair because my leg muscles can’t support me. I’m at the grocery store with my boyfriend and talking to someone at the bakery who we know personally when a woman walks up to us.)

Woman: “Oh, another lazy teen. Why can’t you just walk normally?”

Me: “Uhm, because I have a medical condition?”

Woman: “Don’t you lie! You just don’t wanna walk like everyone else!”

Boyfriend: “She can’t even stand up without assistance. She’s not lazy.”

Woman: “Oh, so you’re in on this, too?!” *looks at bakery clerk* “Do you see what this generation is doing?!”

Clerk: “Yeah, people who regularly see a doctor about their medical problems. She’s been in a wheelchair since I met her.”

Woman: “UGH! LAZY ENTITLED BRATS!” *storms off*

(We laugh after she leaves. The bakery clerk gives us a couple baked goods for half off for the trouble.)

[florida80]

An Acute Case Of A**-holery

Hospital, Israel | Healthy | November 24, 2017


(I work at a hospital. It’s my lunch break, so I go to sit with a friend, who works as a secretary for the hematology clinic. We’re just talking about stuff; there aren’t many clients when this one guy comes in.)

Client: “My name is [Client].”

Friend: “Just a second…” *goes through the appointment list*

(Should be noted that he should’ve brought a referral with him, which he didn’t. Nevertheless, we find the appointment on the list.)

Client: “My case.”

Friend: “Okay, I know. I’ll give it to the doctor—”

Client: “My case, now.”

Friend: “Okay, I get it, I’ll bring it to him now.”

(This guy then followed my friend around to the doctor’s room. When he left an hour later, he didn’t even acknowledge us. He just talked loudly on his phone until my friend gave him his next appointment date and then he just left. That’s an a**-hole, if you ask me…)

[florida80]

Doctor, You Pain Me

Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 23, 2017


(I’m talking to my doctor about a procedure that will prevent future pain. He is familiar with my medical history.)

Doctor: “The surgery will really hurt.”

Me: “But it will be temporary right?”

Doctor: “Yes. But it will REALLY hurt.”

Me: “I’m fine with that if it stops the current pain.”

Doctor: “I don’t think you understand. This will be horrible pain. You’ll have to lie in bed for at least a week.”

Me: “Doctor. I’ve been run through. Do you think it’ll be worse than that?”

Doctor: “No.”

Me: “Then I want to do it.”

Doctor: “But it will hurt!”

(He didn’t let me do it.)

[florida80]

It’s Halal, Not Ha-LOL

Hospital, North Carolina, Religion, USA | Healthy | November 23, 2017


(I am a white teenage girl, just admitted to a ward and I am asleep. The nurse saw me come in with a t-shirt and jeans even though now I’m in a normal hospital gown.)

Dad: “Can my daughter get special meals?”

Nurse: “What kind? Is it an allergy?”

Dad: “She’s Muslim and needs halal food.”

Nurse: *odd look* “Muslim?”

Dad: “Yes.”

Nurse: “That’s ridiculous. She didn’t wear a hijab.”

Dad: “She rarely does, but she is Muslim.”

Nurse: “Then she isn’t really Muslim. She just plays dress up and has a fad diet like all teenagers.” *starts leaving*

Dad: “Oi! She is Muslim and needs halal food. She’s strict about that.”

Nurse: “Yeah, right.”

(My dad gave up and found another nurse who understood and made sure I got halal meals. It could have been much worse.)

[florida80]

Graduated Up To A Personalized Service

Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | November 23, 2017


(I am picking up my medicine and in order to do so, you must give your name and birth date, including year.)

Clerk: “Name?”

Me: “[My Name].”

Clerk: “Birthday?”

Me: “[Date].”

Clerk: “That’s the same day I graduated. To the day.”

Me: “And year. Next time you ask, I’m just going to say, ‘the exact day you graduated.’”

[florida80]

Sickening Lack Of Attentiveness

Hospital, Switzerland | Healthy | November 22, 2017


(I’m staying at the hospital because of an exploded appendix. Unfortunately, the surgery goes wrong and I end up with several complications. One of them includes not being able to hold any liquid, not even the liquid my stomach produces. So despite not eating or drinking anything, I spend several days (around a week) vomiting up green goo until I finally manage to get that under control. A few days later, I’m chatting with a nurse when I suddenly feel the need to barf again! Thankfully, there’s a vomit-bag sitting right next to the nurse.)

Me: *with some urgency* “Can you please give me the vomit bag?”

Nurse: *shocked* “What? I thought you were done with that?”

(At this point I’m afraid that if I talk any more I will just start projectile vomiting so I just stare at her, hoping she’ll get the hint. But the nurse just stares back at me for what seems like an eternity, expecting me to answer the question.)

Me: “Quickly!”

(The nurse finally scrambled to get the bag, but by the time she got it, I’d already started vomiting all over the floor. I sure hope she’ll be more attentive in the future!)

[florida80]

The Sad Estate Of This Family

Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | November 22, 2017


(I work at a long-term care pharmacy. We service patients in nursing homes, assisted living, etc. and bill prescription costs monthly. Of course, this means we have trouble with people not paying their bill. Part of my job is to make collections calls. I hear all kinds of excuses, but this was a first.)

Man: “Hello?”

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] calling from [Pharmacy]. Is [Person #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] available?”

Man: “Nope, he’s in jail over in [County].”

Me: *not sure how to respond* “I’m sorry to hear that… I also have [Person #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ] listed as an authorized contact. May I speak with her?”

Man: “Nope, can’t talk to her either. She’s dead.”

Me: *now REALLY not sure how to respond* “I’m sorry to hear that, too. I’m calling in reference to [Patient]’s account. Who could I speak with that handles [Patient]’s finances?”

Man: “Not him. He’s dead now, too. His wife’s still living but she’s got ‘all-timers’ disease so she won’t be much help.”

Me: *basically at a loss for words at this point* “There must be someone handling [Patient]’s estate. Who would that be?”

Man: “Couldn’t tell you. The only one I know of that’s not dead, locked up, or crazy is [Person #3 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=3) ]. She’s probably the best you’re going to get.”

(Turned out [Person #3 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=3) ] was extremely nice and helpful, and promptly sent a check for the full balance. She must have been the shining star in a family of “dead, locked up, and crazy!”)

[florida80]

Making Sure You All (Co)Pay Dearly

Extra Stupid, Money, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | November 22, 2017


(I work at a long-term care pharmacy. We bill prescriptions monthly, and always get angry phone calls a few days after statements go out.)

Me: “[Pharmacy], this is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Angry Man: “What kind of scam are you all running out there?”

Me: “Sir?”

Angry Man: “Do you think you’re going to get away with charging these outrageous prices? I should report you for robbery!”

Me: “If you have questions about any charges, I’d be happy to explain them to you.”

Angry Man: “As a matter of fact you can! I’d like to know why you’re charging me $50 for a month’s worth of [medication]!”

(I pull up the claim and go through my normal spiel of how we submit a claim to the insurance company, they respond with how much they’ll pay and how much of a copay we need to collect from the patient, and how we have no influence over the cost of the copay, as this is determined by the plan, etc.)

Angry Man: “Well then, how come I can go to [Other Pharmacy] and get three months’ worth for $150?”

Me: “Sir, that’s the same price.”

Angry Man: “You’re trying to tell me that $50 and $150 are the same thing? How stupid can you be to have your job?”

Me: *remembering to be professional and not sarcastic* “No, sir. I’m telling you that $50 for a 30 day supply and $150 for a 90 day supply is exactly the same price.”

Angry Man: “I can’t pay $50 every month for one prescription! I’ll go broke! I’m going to be using [Other Pharmacy] from now on so I can get more for a decent price! And I’m going up to [Nursing Home] and telling everyone there that you’re robbing them!”

Me: *slowly losing professionalism* “You have the right to use whatever pharmacy you like. If you feel the need to tell them that, I can’t stop you. But if they can do basic math, they’ll realize that copays are no different with us than they are anywhere else.”

Angry Man: “I know the tactics you people use to try to confuse me. You talk over my head hoping I’ll give up and pay your ridiculous price! You’re not going to fool me. I’m no dumb-a**!”

(At this point I was contemplating whether it would be worth the complaint I’d get if I said “Well, sir, you certainly could’ve fooled me,” but he slammed the phone down, making my decision for me. People are unbelievably dumb!)

[florida80]

Doctor Nose Best

Boston, Family & Kids, Massachusetts, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | November 21, 2017


(I am a pediatrician. A woman has come in with her little girl who is suffering from a rather infected finger. He diagnoses her with a staph infection, prescribes some antibiotics, and sends them home. At the end of the antibiotics the woman is back in his office, and the infection has spread to several areas; a spot on the little girl’s face, the inside of her nose, and a spot on her leg. She demands that I run a million tests because I’m clearly a “failure of a doctor.”)

Me: “Ma’am, it appears that your daughter has spread the infection to other areas of her body, most likely through scratches or by touching a scratch that was already there.”

Mother: “That’s impossible! How would she get one in her nose? You’re just making excuses because you don’t want to run any tests!”

Me: “I can assure you, ma’am, that’s not the case. If I felt the need to, I would certainly run more tests, but there is no need for all that time, effort, and money when I can clearly see what the cause is. It’s more than 99% certain that she spread it through her nose by a scratch as the bacteria causing the infection is located under her fingernails. She picked her nose, scratched it, and spread the infection there.”

Mother: *turns bright red* “That’s ridiculous! My little princess would never do anything so disgusting as pick her nose! We’re just going to go and get a second opinion! You’ll be run out of business, you’ll see!”

(We turn around to see her “little princess” with a finger very far up her nose indeed. The mother grows nearly purple at this point and swats her daughter’s hand away from her face.)

Me: “So I’ll be prescribing that next round of antibiotics, then?”

[florida80]

His Humor Is Straight As An Arrow

England, Hospital, Non-Dialogue, UK | Healthy | November 21, 2017


Before I retired, I spent many years working permanent nights in operating theatres, giving skilled assistance to the anaesthetist. We performed emergency surgery in quite a few fields but our main area of expertise was plastic surgery.

One night, a young man was brought into the anaesthetic room conscious, calm, and pain-free. We started to talk about what had happened to him. He was a competitive archer and he presented with a carbon fibre arrow through his left hand! On one side there was about a foot of gleaming black arrow with a perfect flight and on the other side there was a hideous splay of fractured carbon fibre. He explained that the only problem with carbon fibre arrows is that they are susceptible to damage if one strikes another in the target. He simply didn’t notice that this particular arrow had been weakened and when he released it the torque caused it to fracture and it punched through his hand.

I started to formally check him in: looking at his wristband I asked him to state his name and date of birth. Both tallied. “When did you last have anything to eat or drink?” Quite a few hours, so no problem. “Are you allergic to anything, especially any drugs or medicines?” No allergies. “Do you have any jewellery or body piercings?” He gestured towards his left hand: “Oh, just the one…”

I felt myself going bright red and we both giggled. We sent him off to sleep and the surgeon removed the arrow, cleaned up and debrided the wound, and carefully checked to see if he’d damaged any of the structures inside his hand. Fortunately, nothing significant had been affected – he was very lucky.

On nights we multitask, so I had to supervise his recovery from the anaesthetic. Before discharging him to the ward, I made sure that he could remember his snappy reply. “You’ll be dining out on that one, I’m sure!”

[florida80]

The ‘Feeling’ Is Mutual

California, Phone, USA | Healthy | November 21, 2017


(I’ve had some pain for several weeks, but recently had a medical test that found nothing wrong. After telling me this result, the doctor left and sent me on my way without any recommendations about how to feel better. I was frustrated so I asked her assistant to have the doctor call me back as soon as possible. I don’t get the call for a few days, and when the doctor finally does call, she sounds annoyed and uninterested.)

Doctor: *on the phone* “So there’s really nothing I can do for you. This sort of thing happens to everyone as they get older…” *stops listening to me and launches into a long standard spiel about aging and health*

Me: *struggling to get a word in edgewise, I finally have an idea* “So, how are you feeling?”

Doctor: “Wha… what?”

Me: *trying not to laugh at how I finally stopped her in her tracks* “I said, how are you feeling?”

Doctor: “You… you’re not supposed to ask me that! I’m supposed to tell you what to do!”

Me: “Well, you must feel one way or another. You are human, right?”

Doctor: *speechless*

(When she finally got her brain back on track, she humbly recommended a doctor at a different hospital who might actually be able to help me!)

[florida80]

Flu Right Past The Diagnosis

Hospital, Las Vegas, Nevada, USA | Healthy | November 20, 2017


(I am in so much pain that I have a friend drive me to the ER. Note: I commonly have stomach problems and this pain is certainly NOT in my stomach. I get seen fairly quickly and given pain medicine but am still in some pain in spite of it.)

Doctor: “Did you recently have the flu?”

Me: “Yes, but this isn’t the flu.”

Doctor: “Yes, it is; it is causing you more pain because you’ve gotten it two times in a row. The pain is in your colon.”

Me: “I’ve had issues like that before. This is not it. Digestive pain does not happen on one side. Check your tests again.”

(The doctor leaves. I continue to experience pain and walk around to try to relieve it as sitting down seems to make it worse. Finally a nurse comes and tells me they are taking me to get an ultrasound.)

Me: “So what happened? Did he finally believe me?”

Nurse: “Yes, your pee sample came back and you had blood in it. You probably have a kidney stone.”

(Guess what was confirmed by the ultrasound? Never have I wanted to punch a doctor so badly. The flu indeed!)

[florida80]

Bleeding Puns

Hospital, Iowa, Punny, USA | Healthy | November 20, 2017


(I’m in the ER with some potential heart issues. At one point, I get a very nice lady in to draw some blood, and she’s joined by a coworker who’s about to go off shift. My elbow veins aren’t cooperating, so I have to get blood drawn from the back of my hand as well. It goes faster after that, and soon, the lady who’s leaving heads out, then pokes her head back in the door.)

Phlebotomist: “Thanks for letting me stick around!”

(My mom and I couldn’t stop laughing. Definitely made the whole visit bearable!)

[florida80]

MRI = Milk Restrictive Invention

Australia, Hospital, New South Wales, Sydney | Healthy | November 20, 2017


(It took my husband and me several years to conceive. I wasn’t overly impressed with my induced labour of 48 hours that resulted in emergency C-section, and I struggle with breastfeeding that can’t be resolved by any method. I am feeling pretty down about not being able to do anything unassisted and am not 100% happy about having to top up every meal with formula but I am determined to keep going with breastfeeding. I’ll admit this is probably out of stubbornness, but it means a lot to me. Meanwhile, I have to have an MRI that I had to reschedule while pregnant and when I make the appointment, I ask if it is safe while breastfeeding. I am assured it is and though I am dubious, I will admit that I don’t look into it further, assuming they know better than I do. The appointment comes up and I leave my six-week-old baby for the first time with my husband and drive myself (also for the first time since the operation) to the radiologist.)

Receptionist: “Yes?”

Me: “Hello, I have an appointment for an MRI. My name is [My Name].”

Receptionist: “Here.”

(She thrusts paperwork at me. I fill it out, listing my allergies and so on, and note that there’s a question asking if I might be pregnant or breastfeeding. I put a tick next to it and finish the form. Handing it back to the receptionist, I ask about the question. She says it’s fine and tells me to sit down. Since I am the last patient of the day, I am taken in before I have a chance to ask her more and I figure it’s better to ask the tech anyway. The radiologist technician glances briefly at my form and sprints off down the corridor with me struggling to keep up. He obviously wants to get out for the day because he’s saying all his introductory explanation spiel to me similar to the squirrel from Hoodwinked. When he comes up for air, I manage to talk.)

Me: “The form asked me if I am breastfeeding.”

Tech: *casually* “Yes, you can’t breastfeed.”

Me: *thinking over his poor choice of words*

Tech: “…are you breastfeeding?”

Me: “Yes, I am breastfeeding. I did ask about this when I booked the appointment. They said it’s fine.”

Tech: “We have to put the dye in you and it’s toxic so you can’t breastfeed for three days after the MRI.”

Me: “That doesn’t explain why they didn’t tell me this when I booked.”

Tech: *looks confused*

Me: “I asked reception today, too. She said it’s fine.”

Tech: “What would they know?”

Me: “Actually, I’d imagine they’d know who can and cannot come for an MRI since it’s their job to book and take appointments.”

Tech: “Oh, yeah, probably then. Well, I can’t answer for them but the dye is toxic. You can’t breastfeed for three days. So just don’t breastfeed and you’ll be all right.”

Me: “That’s okay. I will just reschedule.”

Tech: “Can’t you just stop for a few days?”

Me: *feeling pretty crappy* “I am sorry but I can’t just casually stop breastfeeding.”

Tech: “Just breastfeed more and store up milk for three days.”

Me: “…”

Tech: *cheerfully* “You know you can freeze it, right?”

Me: “It would take me at least a month to build up three days worth.”

Tech: “Okay, we’ll reschedule for a month. That will give you time.”

Me: “…”

Tech: *getting irritated* “Or, just go buy formula. It’s really not that bad.”

Me: “Of course formula isn’t bad, but that’s not the point. If I stop I might not be able to keep going at all.”

Tech: *getting angry* “Then go buy a pump and just throw it away for three days. But make sure you wash it properly because it’s toxic.”

(I am thinking this is not his business and I don’t want to talk about it, but also as I am now teetering on a cliff between furious and devastated, I go on.)

Me: “I need to physically feed her and I can’t just stop. Yes, I pump, but I need to do both. It’s not your business but I have been through too much to throw it away casually like you want me to. Forget the MRI. I am leaving.”

Tech: *cheerful as his work day has ended sooner than he expected* “No worries. We can book you in when you’re ready.”

Me: “Thanks, but I will go somewhere else, with properly trained staff who know what services they can and cannot provide and give proper information in an understanding way, when I am no longer breastfeeding.”

(I was temporarily impressed with my own ability to string more that three words together because I never stick up for myself and I was shaking like a leaf, and I made my way back down the maze like corridors without getting lost. I also managed to get my referral back from the receptionist who talked to the tech in front of me about how I couldn’t get the MRI because I am breastfeeding, to which the receptionist asked “so when do you want to rebook?” and I responded “like h*** I will be,” before leaving and getting in my car. I cried in the car and they never knew it. For that, I was thankful.)

[florida80]

Oh The Eye-rony

Canada, Marriage & Partners, Ontario, Optometrist/Optician, Toronto | Healthy | November 19, 2017


(I walk into my optometrist’s office and find a new secretary. I’m curious about what happened to “Jane,” the last one, especially since “Jane” and the doctor were married! I’m the only one in the office right now so I decide to be nosey:)

Me: *after the preliminary sign in conversation* “So, Jane is no longer here?”

New Secretary: “No, she’s gone.”

Me: “I’m surprised considering her relationship with the Doctor.”

New Secretary: “It was all very awkward, Jane needed to start wearing glasses but she refused to. The doctor had to fire her because she was giving out the wrong prescriptions to people and messing up things like that.”

Me: “Ooh, that’s not good. Wait, she was married to an optometrist and worked in an optometrist’s office and refused to wear glasses?”

New Secretary: “Yup. I shouldn’t say this but I believe it was a case of vanity gone wrong. They’re getting divorced now, too.”

Me: “Gee, I wonder why?”

[florida80]

Let’s Hope It Was A Clean Break

Australia, home, Ignoring & Inattentive, Queensland | Healthy | November 18, 2017


(Our two storey house has a lot of windows, many of them quite high up, so we use a window cleaning service. We’ve used the same guy every time. One day, he brings a coworker with him. He introduces me to the coworker, who responds to my greeting by saying curtly:)

Coworker: “Yeah, hi. Where are your taps? We need to get started.”

(I’m working in my home office, which is upstairs. I see the ladder resting against the side of the house and our window cleaner ascending it. He gives me a friendly smile and wave and right then, the ladder wobbles and he falls. I race outside and he’s lying on the grass unconscious. I rush into the house for the phone and as I do, I pass the coworker.)

Me: “[Window Cleaner] has just fallen from his ladder; he’s out cold! I’m calling an ambulance!”

Coworker: “You do that.”

(He doesn’t make a move to check on his colleague; he just carries on cleaning. I call the ambulance and rush back outside.)

Me: “Didn’t you hear what I said? [Window Cleaner] has had a bad fall. Why aren’t you checking on him?”

Coworker: “You just said you’d called the ambulance. What do you want me to do about it? Do you want your windows cleaned or not?!”

(I’m not about to stand there arguing with him and I rush round the house to open the gate for the paramedics and to stay with my window cleaner until they arrive. As they are assessing him he starts to come round, but is later revealed to have a broken ankle, a broken collarbone, and a concussion. After the paramedics have taken him away, I go back to the coworker.)

Me: “I think he’ll be okay. They’ve taken him to [Hospital]. Shouldn’t you follow the ambulance or let his wife know or SOMETHING?”

Coworker: *after a long pause in which he just stares at me* “That’ll be $160.00.”

[florida80]

Using His Outdoor Voice Inside

Australia, Medical Office | Healthy | November 17, 2017


(I am opening the clinic, getting to work at 8:30 am when we open at 9:00 am. I am an avid believer of keeping the shutters closed and main lights off until I am completely ready to accept people. I leave the back-door unlocked for the remainder of staff to come in, as not everyone has a key. The back door has a ‘Staff Only’ sign. Walking around the department in the dark, paper-like bed sheets in my arms, I hear a strange yelling sound. Outside it is incredibly windy and the back door is unlocked so I assume it has something to do with that. While replacing toilet paper in the bathrooms, there is another yell. This time I poke my head out the back door and see nothing. I am finally behind the desk logging into the systems when a loud slamming sound makes me jump and in full view of the back room across the hall I see an unhappy older man march in. The lights are still off. The shutters out front are closed. There are no escape doors for me. The setting made it seem terrifying, but I really only stood there in shock. It is 8:40 am.)

Patient: *yelling as he walks up* “Your doors are closed! I have an appointment at nine!”

Me: “Y-Yes. We don’t open for another twenty minutes, sir.”

Patient: “I have an appointment! Do you expect me to wait outside in the cold? I’m not waiting outside!”

(I am still genuinely scared and consider calling the police because he is being very aggressive and I fear for my safety. Then I think, why is he not waiting in his car? Did he expect everyone to open twenty minutes early just because he was there?)

Me: “I’m not prepared to take anyone yet. That’s why everything is still closed. My computer hasn’t finished signing in.”

Patient: “FINE! I’ll wait here! I’m not waiting outside!”

(Still scared, but somewhat mad now, I left the desk and made myself busy. Then I went to the tea room and waited until 8:50. Meanwhile, the techs had come in with strange looks, wanting to know what the man’s situation was. After that, I returned, turned on the lights, and opened the shutters. His car was parked outside. Point of the story: patients genuinely scare staff when they get like this. When it comes to people’s health, they are capable of anything. I thought he was going to hit me!)

[florida80]

It’s Our Morning Period

Arizona, Medical Office, Phoenix, USA | Healthy | November 17, 2017


(Our office is only open a half-day on Friday. This takes place at about 11:00 am.)

Patient: “So, today is your half-day, right?”

Me: “Right; we’re only open half the day on Fridays.”

Patient: “Are you open in the morning or the afternoon?”

Me: *looks around at the waiting room full of patients, including her* “Uh… Morning.”

Patient: “Oh, that would make sense.”

[florida80]

Vets Need To Vet Their Pharmacists

New York, Pharmacy, USA, Vet | Healthy | November 17, 2017


(I take my sick dog to the vet and they don’t have the medicine he needs, so they send me to a store to pick it up from their pharmacy.)

Me: “Hi, I’m here to pick up medicine for my dog.”

Rep: “What’s the name?”

Me: “Well, my name is [My Name], but my dog is named Austin.”

Rep: “The medicine is for Austin? What’s Austin’s date of birth?”

Me: “I honestly don’t know what they would have for that; he is a rescue.”

Rep: “Do you have a phone number for Austin?”

Me: “My number is [number].”

Rep: “I don’t need your number. I need the patient’s number.”

Me: “He’s a golden retriever. He doesn’t have a number.”

Rep: “Look, I need information or I can’t give you anything. I can’t even find the prescription.”

Me: “It was called in by [Vet Hospital, with ‘Veterinary’ in the name].”

(The rep yells to the people behind him:)

Rep: “Did we get a call from a [Vet Hospital, but without the word ‘Veterinary’]?”

(I try to correct him, but he brushes me off and the other employees tell him no.)

Rep: “Look, try talking to someone at the drop off window. Right now, you can’t prove you even have a prescription.”

Me: “I don’t have a prescription, but my dog, Austin, does from his veterinarian.”

(The rep glares at me and points to the drop off window. I go over.)

Me: “Hi, I’m here to pick up medicine for my dog, Austin, that my veterinarian called in.”

Drop-Off Pharmacist: “I have that here. What’s your phone number so I can verify?” *I provide it* “Okay, our customer service rep at the main register will check you out.”

(I get back in the first line with the same rep.)

Rep: “What’s this? They found it? Well, I still need you to verify Austin’s information, or call him to get it.”

Me: “Again, Austin is a dog. See? The medicine is listed for veterinary; there’s even a picture of a dog on the package.”

Rep: “Okay, you need to talk to the pharmacist.”

(He puts the medicine on the back counter. I wait five minutes and the pharmacist comes out.)

Pharmacist: “What questions do you have?”

Me: “None, actually. The vet said just to give him a pill twice a day.”

Pharmacist: “Okay. [Rep], why did you call me up?”

Rep: “Is it even legal to give this to her? She doesn’t have the patient’s information.”

Pharmacist: “The patient is a dog. It’s fine.”

Rep: “A dog? Who needs medicine for a dog? Whatever, here.”

(He hands me the bag with the medication.)

Me: “I haven’t paid.”

Rep: “Yeah, you did; I rang you out.”

Me: “No.”

Pharmacist: “This wasn’t paid for. Let me personally ring you out over here. I’m going to write down my information and the name of the other employee who helped you. If you have any questions, comments, or complaints, please send them to this email address. Please send them. We need to have a certain number of complaints before we can let an employee go.”

[florida80]

Screaming For A New Nurse

Hospital, Mississippi, USA | Healthy | November 16, 2017


(This occurs when I am 19 years old, and in the hospital giving birth. I am a fairly tiny person, my baby is pretty huge, and I’m in my 23rd hour of labor, so you can see how I might be stressed out. The first time I let out a pained scream…)

Nurse: *disgustedly* “You know the screaming doesn’t actually help, right?”

(My mom and boyfriend gawk at her.)

Boyfriend: “Are you kidding? Did you seriously just say that?”

Nurse: *defensively* “Look, I’m just saying that it’s 3:00 am; people are trying to sleep. She’s being really loud.”

Mom: “GET THE F*** OUT OF HERE!”

(She huffed and walked out of the room without a word, leaving another nurse to scramble in to help. I saw her a few more times during my stay, and thankfully she kept her mouth shut.)

[florida80]

Cold-Blooded Humor

Alberta, Canada, Hospital | Healthy | November 16, 2017


(I received a call from my doctor after having some blood work done, telling me to get to the ER immediately for a blood transfusion, as my hemoglobin levels were critically low. A friend of mine takes me and stays with me for support. She likes to try and lighten the mood with a sarcastic sense of humor. This occurs when the nurse brings in the first bag of blood and hooks it up to my IV…)

Me: “Oh, wow… that’s a strange sensation!”

Nurse: “What? It’s not burning is it? Does it hurt?”

Me: “Not at all… It’s just really cold! I’ve never felt cold inside my body before.”

Friend: “Cold? Geez, Nurse! Can’t ya warm it up a little for her?”

Nurse: “…umm.”

Friend: “Just throw it in the microwave for a few minutes! My friend says it’s too cold here!”

Nurse: *mouth agape with a look of horror*

Me: “[Friend]… I don’t think she knows you’re joking.”

Friend: “Oh… Oh, my god! I’m totally joking! Just trying to lighten the mood!”

Nurse: “Oh, thank goodness! I mean, whatever you want to do on your own time, sure… but I’m not wasting precious O negative in this hospital for your little experiment here!”

(We had a good laugh after that. And after two bags of the red stuff my hemoglobin levels were back up to normal!)

[florida80]

Addicted To Death

Alberta, Canada, Hospital | Healthy | November 16, 2017


(I am eleven years old. My mother works in the kitchen of the local hospital and sometimes her duties involve delivering food trays to the patients. I remember her talking about the times on one floor where she would hear people moaning and crying, begging for morphine, as they lay painfully dying from whatever cancer was taking them from this world. One day, when I am out front of the hospital, I begin talking with a nurse who is waiting for the bus. We touch on a few topics until I remember my mother’s worlds about the terminally ill patients.)

Me: “My mother works in the kitchen and delivers food trays. She has told me about the dying people begging for morphine. Why don’t you give them what they need?”

Nurse: “Because they could become addicted, of course!”

Me: *I pondered her words for a few moments then replied* “Well, why don’t you give them the morphine they need, and then when they die, cut them off?”

Nurse: *giving me the stink-eye* “Little smart-a**!” *walks away in a huff*

[florida80]

Too Bad You Can’t Transfuse Out Racism

Bigotry, Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 16, 2017


(This happened to one of my professors in the 1970s while they were working in a hospital’s blood bank dispensary. It wasn’t uncommon at that time for people to be somewhat fixated on the concept of receiving blood from their own race only. Some people falsely believed that “black blood” would “turn you black,” and all sorts of other ridiculous racist things. A patient who has recently received a blood transfusion somehow gets their number.)

Caller: “What color was the blood you gave me?”

Professor: *knowing what they’re asking, but refusing to play* “Red.”

Caller: “No. Where did it come from?”

Professor: “From someone’s veins, out of the goodness of their hearts.”

Caller: “No, I mean, what type of person did it come from?”

Professor: “A generous, kind, and loving one. Look, I don’t know their race, and it doesn’t matter anyway, and I wouldn’t tell you if I did know.”

Caller: “F*** you!”

[florida80]

Leaving You High And Dry

Awesome Workers, England, Hospital, Inspirational, Kind Strangers, London, UK | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(I’ve gone to the hospital for an ultrasound scan. On my way to the hospital, I am caught in a flash rainstorm and have no umbrella, so I am completely soaked through by the time I arrive.)

Doctor: “Ms. [Surname]?

Me: “Hi.”

Doctor: “Oh, you poor thing; you’re soaked though.”

Me: “Yeah, it was raining really hard out there.”

(We enter the ultrasound room.)

Sonographer: “Hi. I’m [Sonographer], and I’ll be doing your scan today. If I could ask you to lie on the bench…”

Me: “Sure. Uh, I’m sorry; I’m going to make it a little damp, I think.”

Doctor: “Don’t apologise; we’re just sorry you’re so wet. Wait, hold on. We have spare hospital gowns somewhere.”

Sonographer: “In the waiting room. I’ll grab one. Hopefully your clothes can dry a little when we do the scan.”

(She goes out.)

Doctor: “Right. Let’s see if I can switch the air-conditioner off in here, or get it to run hot.”

Me: “Thanks!”

Doctor: “Not a problem.”

(The sonographer comes back with a hospital gown, so I get changed. After the scan is done…)

Doctor: “All done. Do you have to be anywhere? Otherwise, maybe we could see if there’s somewhere for you to sit so your clothes can dry.”

Me: “That’s very kind, but I have to go back home and carry on working.”

Doctor: “Hmm, I wonder if we can get you a hairdryer for a quick solution, then.”

Sonographer: “Let me think…” *pause* “I’m pretty sure we don’t have any we can use, but if you take the first left, there are some toilets with a pretty good hand-dryer, which you might be able to stand under.”

(I ended up having to rush back, but I was extremely grateful to the doctor and sonographer for trying to find a way to dry me off!)

[florida80]

Will Come Down With Swine Flu

Medical Office, Montana, USA | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(I work at a small clinic which has a break room right next to my desk, so I smell everyone’s reheated lunch. I don’t eat pork.)

Me: “Do you have to eat that at my desk? It smells awful!”

Coworker: “Oh, you’ll be fine. Your hot cop is coming in today.”

(I have a regular patient who is a cop.)

Me: “He’s not ‘my hot cop.’ He’s twice my age.”

Coworker: “Whatever.” *walks away, taking her rancid lunch with her*

Me: *yelling* “Oh, sick! NOW IT SMELLS LIKE BACON IN HERE! I FREAKING HATE PIGS!”

(Right then my “hot cop patient” walked around the corner, and if looks could kill… Needless to say, when he came in for follow-up, I just happened to come down with the flu that day.)

[florida80]

Take (Medi)Care To Stay Alive

Grandparents, home, Rhode Island, USA | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(I am with my grandmother, who gets tons of sales calls, which everyone in the house finds obnoxious. One day, I answer the phone for her.)

Salesperson: “Hello, this is Medicare. Can I speak to [Grandmother]?”

Me: “She’s dead.”

Salesperson: “Okay, I’ll make a note of that on her file. Goodbye.”

(He hangs up. My grandmother is staring at me in shock.)

Grandma: “DID YOU JUST TELL MEDICARE THAT I DIED?! I’LL LOSE MY INSURANCE!”

(Naturally, I freak out. I’m near hysterical as I call the company and tell them what I had done.)

Medicare Person: “Did someone call the house? Because Medicare only calls if you have made an appointment in advance. We still have her alive on here.”

(So luckily they were scammers. However, I will never do that again. Ever.)

[florida80]

Allergic To Common Sense, Part 12

Health & Body, Restaurant, USA, Washington DC | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(I’m a manager for a popular casual restaurant. I receive a phone call from an upset customer.)

Caller: “Why don’t you offer allergy menus? My daughter almost died from eating calamari! Why would you serve her something that she is allergic to, and she’s pregnant!”

Me: “I do apologize for your daughter’s condition and we do offer a dozen different types of menus which do include an allergen menu, nutritional menus, large print menus, etc.”

Caller: “How am I supposed to know you have these menus?!”

Me: “Did you ask? Also, if your daughter knew she was allergic to calamari, why would she order it?”

Caller: “She didn’t know she was allergic to it! That’s why I was asking about the allergen menu!”

Me: “Okay, so, if she doesn’t know that she is allergic to calamari, how are we supposed to know?”

Caller: *realizes the paradox* “Well, she’s pregnant and I am really scared.”

(I’m a mom of two.)

Me: “I understand you are scared and when a person is pregnant their body goes through a lot of changes; consult with the doctor and I hope she will be okay.”

(I never got a call back I wonder if she still thinks we should automatically know if someone is allergic to something.)

[florida80]

Allergic To Common Sense, Part 11

Restaurant | Right | February 22, 2017


(I work in a southwestern-themed restaurant, and many of our recipes include similar spices, just in different amounts. Onion is one of the most prominent ingredients in our recipes, and we sometimes get a request for ‘no onion’ in certain items. We can make some things, but it’d be pretty much just lettuce, cheese, and any number of fresh chopped vegetables that aren’t onion or mixed with anything that has onion in it. As such, I get this man in line.)

Customer: “I’d like a burrito.”

Me: “Okay, would you like that with or without guacamole today?”

Customer: “With.”

(The guacamole has onion in it.)

Me: “What kind of meat on your burrito?”

Customer: “Chicken.”

(The chicken has onion in the seasoning.)

Me: “Any rice or beans?”

Customer: “Sure, I’ll take [rice with onion in it], and [beans with onion in them].”

Me: “Any grilled vegetables?”

Customer: “Ooh, no, thank you. I’m allergic to onion.”

Me: “Sir… if you’re allergic to onions then I highly suggest you don’t eat this burrito. There is a load of onion in it already.”

Customer: “Oh, no, I’m only allergic to onion that I can see.”

(Eight years of culinary experience, and this is the first time I’ve heard that excuse. I made him his burrito – leaving off anything with visible onion – and he went on his way. No complaints yet.)

[florida80]

Allergic To Common Sense, Part 10

Restaurant | Right | September 27, 2016


(I am a cashier at a restaurant. We are a small business and the owners are still working on the perfect way to run the business. A couple walks in and orders at the counter as usual. After finding a table, the woman returns to the counter.)

Customer: “Excuse me; do you have any larger chairs? My husband is too large to fit in these.”

(I know we don’t have any, but I go in the back to ask the owner for advice anyway. I return to the counter with no real solution.)

Me: *”No, ma’am. We don’t have any larger chairs; I’m sorry for your husband’s discomfort.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks anyway.”

(She goes back to her table, visibly upset. The husband returns to fill his drink, and I notice he is wearing an adult bib. They eat all their food with seemingly no complaints. They talk for a few minutes, and then the wife returns to the counter.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’m having an allergic reaction. Is the manager around?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Let me go grab the owner for you.”

Owner: “What’s wrong, ma’am ?”

Customer: “My throat is itchy. I’m allergic to something in your food. Could you name the ingredients for me?”

Owner: *names every ingredient in the food she and her husband has eaten*

Customer: “I’m not allergic to any of that.”

Owner: “I’m sorry, ma’am, then you didn’t have an allergic reaction here.”

Customer: *becoming more angry by the second* “I said my throat is itchy and I’m having an allergic reaction! Don’t you care at all about your customers?”

Owner: “Would you like me to call an ambulance?”

Customer: “No! I’m fine! We were just leaving!”

(She pulled her husband out the door. He seemed indifferent to her “allergic reaction.” He even waved to us on the way out.)

[florida80]

Allergic To Common Sense, Part 9

Sandwich Shop | Right | June 24, 2016


(I work in a busy sandwich shop in a retail centre. It’s relatively quiet when a man and his two sons enter. They are regulars, but are usually rude. The father ignores us and plays with his phone while the kids order.)

Me: “And what salad would you like?”

Son #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : *reels off salads* “…and onions. And [burger sauce].”

Me: *wraps his sandwich for him and hands it over before moving on*

(A few minutes after the father has paid, he storms back to the counter with Son #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ’s sandwich.)

Father: “There are onions in here. He cannot eat onions. He is allergic!”

Me: *worried about the allergy* “I’m so sorry! Do you need me to call emergency services?!

Father: “What? No. He’s just allergic!”

Me: *I’m confused, but relieved more than anything* “Okay, I’m very sorry! I’ll make you a new one straight away.”

(I make the new sandwich as before, and ask the boy over to tell me his salad items again.)

Son #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : *reels off his salads* “And onion.”

Me: *hesitates* “I’m sorry, but your father asked me not to add onions.”

Father: *from other side of restaurant* “NO ONIONS!”

Son #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : *sighs* “Fine. But I want the [burger sauce]!”

Me: “I’m afraid that sauce has onions—”

Father: “NO ONION!”

Me: “—is there anything else I can offer you?”

Son #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “I just want the d*** [burger sauce]!”

Father: *storms up to counter* “He can have the sauce!”

Me: “The [burger sauce] contains onions so I’m not comf—”

Father: “Just give him the sauce!”

Me: *shrugs and puts the sauce on, adding extra when asked before wrapping the sandwich up*

Father: *snatches sandwich before I can bag it* “No onion! Was that so hard to understand?” *storms off again*

(They spent the rest of their meal glaring at me while I worked and left their mess all over the table, including the original sandwich they rejected. When I went to clean up, I find all of the onion had been removed from the sandwich and was nowhere to be seen.)

[florida80]

Pokémon Go To The Doctors

Finland, Medical Office, Pokemon | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(It is right around the time when Pokémon Go has come out. I take a fairly serious fall and injure my hip. When it doesn’t improve after a few days, I go to a doctor who specializes in sports injuries.)

Doctor: “How did you injure your hip?”

Me: “I fell off a stepladder.”

Doctor: “Oh, thank goodness! You’re the first patient I’ve had all week who didn’t injure themselves playing Pokémon Go.”

[florida80]

Enough To Make You Slap Your Forehead

Pharmacy, Sweden | Healthy | November 15, 2017


(I work at a pharmacy. A patient is complaining about a spray she had bought a couple of days ago.)

Patient: “It did absolutely not work! It is a nasal spray for sinusitis! Since it contains cortisone, it should work!”

Me: “How do you use it?”

(I ask, since the biggest problem with stuff like this is that you usually use maybe too little, too much, or just plain wrong. She looks at me, a little offended.)

Patient: *sounding annoyed* “Well, I use it as the description says! Two sprays once a day!”

(I think long and hard about how it couldn’t have made any difference for her.)

Patient: “Besides, it gets so messy, and it doesn’t dry quickly at all!”

Me: *can’t wrap my brains about what she meant* “Can you please explain?”

(She took out the spray with a annoyed sigh and held it up against her forehead. She had used the nasal spray on her forehead. I tried my absolute hardest not to laugh and explained as professionally as I could that the spray for sinusitis is to be sprayed in your nose, and not on your forehead.)

[florida80]

Man, What A Mistake!

The Netherlands, Vet | Healthy | November 14, 2017


(I am 18 years old and have recently moved out on my own and finally bought my very first pet, a golden hamster. I bring the hamster to the vet because I notice quite a large lump near the hind quarters and I want to check it out.)

Me: “Yes, see, the lump is quite big.”

Vet: “You mean here?”

Me: “Yes, I hope it is not serious.”

Vet: *nearly dying of laughter* “Those are his male genitals. He seems to be quite healthy.”

Me: “Oh, my god! I am so sorry! Really? The sales person at the store said she was a girl!”

Vet: “Well, it’s a healthy boy.”

Me: “I feel really stupid, but thanks!”

(Don’t worry for my hamster. He lived quite a healthy happy life until nearly three-and-a-half years old, even though he went through life named “Rose.”)

[florida80]

Ensuring The Insulin Is Insul-out

Hospital, Mississippi, USA | Healthy | November 14, 2017


(I work in the satellite pharmacy at my hospital. A triage technician is always on hand to answer calls and messages from doctors, nurses, and other pharmacists. It’s a difficult job that requires deft technicians: some of the calls they get raise issues that are difficult to resolve, and others are just plain goofy. D5W is short for a stock solution of 5% dextrose sugar in water.)

Triage Tech: *picking up the phone* “Pharmacy, how can I help you?” *pause* “No, ma’am, I don’t believe those two are compatible with each other. ” *pause* “What? No, no, I don’t actually know offhand if the drug would precipitate out or react with the D5W in any way. I could look that up for you, but in this case I really don’t think it’s necessary. ” *pause* “You’re asking me if you can add insulin to D5W” *pause* “You want to infuse your patient with both sugar and insulin at once. Just… please… don’t.”

[florida80]

Kindness In Death

England, Hospital, London, Non-Dialogue, UK | Healthy | November 14, 2017


I used to work in an oncology unit specialising in gastrointestinal cancers – the sort of thing that, by the time it got to us, all we could do was arrange for palliative treatment to make the time the patient had left longer and more comfortable. I handled phone calls from the patients and families, all of whom were obviously upset and as a result not as thoughtful as they might have been.

Sometimes, they had a right to be abrasive, though. One man whose mother needed an urgent chemotherapy booking had been left hanging for weeks, and the registrar who was supposed to be handling the booking hadn’t done anything despite the fact that her prognosis was dwindling all the time. Eventually, I got fed up; I grabbed the patient file and the documentation that he hadn’t signed yet, interrupted the consultant at lunch, stood over him until he checked and signed the document, delivered everything to the ward personally, and, apologising to the still-furious son of the patient, told him his mother had an appointment the following day.

Less than a month later, I got word that the patient in that story had died. Two days after that, reception told me that said patient’s son was on his way to my office. I was sure he was coming to berate me to my face… but when he turned up, it was with a small silk rose and a small box of chocolates. He told me that he wanted to apologise for losing his temper, and tell me how grateful he was for how hard I’d worked to see that his mother got proper care.

I am never going to forget the man who managed to be so thoughtful of someone else even with such a recent bereavement. It’s the yardstick to which I hold my behaviour to this day.

[florida80]

Getting Your Religion With Surgical Precision

Hospital, Religion, Texas, USA | Healthy | November 13, 2017


(I get a phone call from the hospital where I’ll be having outpatient surgery at in a few days. The nurse is asking me personal questions about my medical history, medicines, and gets to questions about religion. I’m atheist.)

Nurse: “Do you have any spiritual or religious objections that interfere with this surgery?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Nurse: “Do you go to church?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Nurse: *pauses* “Well, that’s okay. What religion are you?”

Me: “None.”

Nurse: “None?”

Me: “Yes, none. I’m atheist.”

Nurse: *takes long pause*

Me: “Are you there, ma’am?”

Nurse: “Do you need prayer?”

Me: “…what?”

Nurse: “Would you like prayer before the surgery?”

Me: “No…? I’m fine without prayer. But thanks.”

Nurse: “Have you ever been to church?”

Me: “Yes.”

Nurse: *long pause, then whispered* “Well, that’s okay.”

(We continued after that without any problems or weird pauses.)

[florida80]

When Patients Aren’t

Australia, Hospital, Non-Dialogue | Healthy | November 13, 2017


It’s a Friday night, and my dad has been really sick all week. It eventually gets to the point where he needs to go to the emergency room. Being a Friday night, the ER is relatively full.

Once he gets there, and speaks to the nurse, he is immediately given a wheelchair and taken straight through. The looks of disgust and just pure hatred he got from everyone in the waiting room was astonishing.

He had pneumonia, and had he arrived even an hour later, chances are he would have died.

Seriously, if someone is taken straight through at the emergency room, chances are their problems are probably worse than yours!

[florida80]

Kindness In Death

England, Hospital, London, Non-Dialogue, UK | Healthy | November 14, 2017


I used to work in an oncology unit specialising in gastrointestinal cancers – the sort of thing that, by the time it got to us, all we could do was arrange for palliative treatment to make the time the patient had left longer and more comfortable. I handled phone calls from the patients and families, all of whom were obviously upset and as a result not as thoughtful as they might have been.

Sometimes, they had a right to be abrasive, though. One man whose mother needed an urgent chemotherapy booking had been left hanging for weeks, and the registrar who was supposed to be handling the booking hadn’t done anything despite the fact that her prognosis was dwindling all the time. Eventually, I got fed up; I grabbed the patient file and the documentation that he hadn’t signed yet, interrupted the consultant at lunch, stood over him until he checked and signed the document, delivered everything to the ward personally, and, apologising to the still-furious son of the patient, told him his mother had an appointment the following day.

Less than a month later, I got word that the patient in that story had died. Two days after that, reception told me that said patient’s son was on his way to my office. I was sure he was coming to berate me to my face… but when he turned up, it was with a small silk rose and a small box of chocolates. He told me that he wanted to apologise for losing his temper, and tell me how grateful he was for how hard I’d worked to see that his mother got proper care.

I am never going to forget the man who managed to be so thoughtful of someone else even with such a recent bereavement. It’s the yardstick to which I hold my behaviour to this day.

[florida80]

Getting Your Religion With Surgical Precision

Hospital, Religion, Texas, USA | Healthy | November 13, 2017


(I get a phone call from the hospital where I’ll be having outpatient surgery at in a few days. The nurse is asking me personal questions about my medical history, medicines, and gets to questions about religion. I’m atheist.)

Nurse: “Do you have any spiritual or religious objections that interfere with this surgery?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Nurse: “Do you go to church?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Nurse: *pauses* “Well, that’s okay. What religion are you?”

Me: “None.”

Nurse: “None?”

Me: “Yes, none. I’m atheist.”

Nurse: *takes long pause*

Me: “Are you there, ma’am?”

Nurse: “Do you need prayer?”

Me: “…what?”

Nurse: “Would you like prayer before the surgery?”

Me: “No…? I’m fine without prayer. But thanks.”

Nurse: “Have you ever been to church?”

Me: “Yes.”

Nurse: *long pause, then whispered* “Well, that’s okay.”

(We continued after that without any problems or weird pauses.)

[florida80]

When Patients Aren’t

Australia, Hospital, Non-Dialogue | Healthy | November 13, 2017


It’s a Friday night, and my dad has been really sick all week. It eventually gets to the point where he needs to go to the emergency room. Being a Friday night, the ER is relatively full.

Once he gets there, and speaks to the nurse, he is immediately given a wheelchair and taken straight through. The looks of disgust and just pure hatred he got from everyone in the waiting room was astonishing.

He had pneumonia, and had he arrived even an hour later, chances are he would have died.

Seriously, if someone is taken straight through at the emergency room, chances are their problems are probably worse than yours!

[florida80]

Making A Point About The Time To Appoint

Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 13, 2017


(My doctor’s appointment is at two pm. The nearest bus stop is an hour from my house, so I have to catch a ride with my mom at seven am. Her work has a bus stop right next to it. By eleven am, I have finally made it to the hospital. I go to the front desk to check in.)

Me: “Hi! I know I’m early, sorry, but I can just wait.”

Nurse: *loud sigh* “I’ll see if I can have him see you earlier.”

Me: “No, it’s really fine. I ride the bus, so I’m always early because I’m afraid of being late. It’s fine. I’m sorry I’m so early.”

Nurse: “Just sit down.”

(I went to sit down and listened as she called the doctor. Even though I didn’t want her to, she fiddled with the schedule until the doctor could see me early. The vitals nurse and doctor told me how inconsiderate I was for wanting to be seen early. It is a miserable appointment.)

[florida80]

They’re Massaging The Truth

Chicago, Illinois, Spa, USA | Healthy | November 12, 2017


(Where I work the hands-on part of the massage is 50 minutes. There is a client who knows this, as I and others have told him several times, yet he always pretends to be surprised and mad about it. He has been coming in two or three times a month for over a year. It always goes something like this:)

Me: *after discussing what he wants worked on* “Okay, you can undress and start face down, I’ll be back in a couple minutes.”

Client: “A couple minutes?! Why? I’ll only be ten seconds! Don’t go anywhere.”

Me: “I need to return your file up front and wash my hands. I’ll be two minutes.”

Client: “I only need ten second to undress.”

Me: “Okay. I’ll see you in a couple minutes.” *closes door*

(Often when I’m in the break room washing my hands I can hear his voice out in the hall saying: “I’m ready! Hello? Hello?” I give him his 50 minutes hands-on massage, and end at, say, 6:55.)

Me: “Okay, thank you. I’ll go get you some water and—”

Client: “Done?! Already?”

Me: “I’m afraid so!”

Client: “Why?”

Me: “Well, that’s all of our time. I have another client at seven.”

Client: “Yes, so we have five more minutes.”

Me: “The hands on portion of our massage is 50 minutes.” *as you’ve been told several times, you idiot!*

Client: “Why?”

Me: “I’ll go get you your water and meet you in the hall.”

(He is sometimes grumpy when he meets me in the hall, or sometimes he thanks me and says he feels great. Either way, he always complains to the front desk that I ended five minutes early, and they always tell him that I did not and that he paid for a 50 minute hands-on massage!)

[florida80]

They Don’t Nose What They’re Doing

Hospital, Montana, Non-Dialogue, USA | Healthy | November 11, 2017


In a matter of two days, what I thought was a pimple in my nostril turned into something horrific. I wake up in the middle of the night to the entire lower half of my face swollen. I have a high fever. I have no choice but to venture to the ER.

The whole time the ER nurses are questioning me, I’m feeling condescended to. They seem to think that since I’m not in a great deal of pain that the swelling can be written off as basically nothing. They give me three pills to send me on my way. The next night the swelling is worse, I’m throwing up and in a great deal of pain. I return to the ER. They “lance” my nose but hardly try to get anything out. They give me more of the same pills and Percocet. They claim the swelling will go away in 24 hours and not to worry; it’s nothing serious.

My aunt and mother grow extremely concerned. My aunt calls around and finds a nose specialist/surgeon. I talk to him on the phone. He wants to see me immediately — also, it’s his day off! My mother ends up flying in because she is so worried. She makes it just in time and goes in the room with me to see the specialist. He takes one look at me and says, “We need to perform surgery immediately.”

He essentially had to cut open my nose, drain it, and put a tube in it. He got about a cup’s worth of infection out. After the surgery, he pulls my mother aside and asks what the emergency room tried to do help me to get better. To sum it up they essentially gave me the wrong type of medicine and overlooked my condition. He tells my mother that if I waited another couple days to see him I might have died. The infection could have traveled in my blood stream to my brain and become deadly. This happens frequently due to the location of the infection, and people die from ERs overlooking it.

[florida80]

You Walked Right Into That One

Hospital, Non-Dialogue, Oklahoma, USA | Healthy | November 10, 2017


My boyfriend is away on a trip for several days. On the first day he scrapes his leg on something, but the cut isn’t deep and he doesn’t think anything about it. By the end of his trip, his leg is swollen, sore, and hot to the touch. When he gets home he can barely put weight on it, and once we get ice on it and the swelling goes down, we see that his calf muscle is knotted up, creating a huge ‘dent’ in his leg. Worried that it could be something like a blood clot, I insist on rushing him to the ER.

We get there, and my boyfriend insists on walking in, though I drop him off as close to the doors as I can, so he doesn’t have to limp too far. He almost doesn’t make it through signing all of the paperwork because standing hurts so much. We get to the back quickly, and a doctor sees us and states that they will do an ultrasound to rule out a clot. All good so far.

After the ultrasound tech leaves we wait. And wait. For about an hour.

Finally a nurse comes in and asks if we’re ready to leave. After some confused glances, we point out that we were never given a diagnosis. The nurse apologizes, saying she thought we’d already spoken to the doctor because our paperwork was up for discharge, but she’ll go get him right away.

Okaaay…

The doctor comes in, tells us it isn’t a clot, and that it must be an infection. What kind of infection is not stated (they didn’t test to find out), and she bids us goodbye after stating that there will be a prescription for antibiotics for him at our pharmacy.

Then my boyfriend tries to get up… but can’t. After an hour and a half of having his leg elevated, bringing it below waist level is incredibly painful and he can’t manage it. Note: I am 5’3″ and 170 lbs; he is 6’4″ and 260 lbs. I cannot help him out alone.

I go out into the main hall and explain the situation to the doctor, and how we need some way to get my boyfriend up and out of the ER. He says, okay, we’ll get him some pain medication. Cool. Sounds like a plan. So we wait again.

For. Another. HOUR.

Finally I venture out again and flag down a nurse. Guess what: THEY FORGOT WE WERE STILL THERE. Like, just completely forgot a patient was still in a room.

The nurse has to go flag down the doctor again, and I go back to the room. Not too long after, a new nurse comes in and hands my boyfriend a piece of paper. It’s a scrip for pain medication, to be filled at our pharmacy. So… you know… not helpful in the least with our current predicament.

We explain to the nurse the problem, and she responds, in the most condescending voice possible, ‘Well, you walked INTO the ER, so clearly you CAN walk.’

Both my boyfriend and myself are just stunned by the audacity of the statement. When he came in at triage he gave his pain as an eight. We are now telling them it has gotten worse, and the response we’re getting is basically ‘walk it off, p****.’

Attempts to reason with her are fruitless — she just repeats the same thing to us and even implies that we are being ungrateful for the better prescription for pain medicine (‘Originally, we were only prescribing you ibuprofen, but we were nice enough to write you this prescription, too’). After arguing in circles with her for a few minutes, my boyfriend builds up enough rage-adrenaline to heave himself out of bed and just grit through the pain, though he turns bright red in doing it. The nurse seems to take this as a victory and flounces off — no offer for a wheelchair or crutches, even just to get to the car.

On the way to the car we agreed that unless one of us is actively dying, we’re going to the next town over for ER care from now on.

[florida80]

Numb To Death

Hospital, Kansas, USA | Healthy | November 10, 2017


(Earlier this year I have cataract surgery on my right eye, and I am very nervous about it, never having had eye surgery before. The nurse knows this and is doing her best to keep me calm while waiting for the surgeon. Then this happens:)

Me: “Will I feel anything during surgery?”

Nurse: “Oh, no, your eye will be dead!”

Me: “…”

Nurse: “Sorry, numb! Your eye will be numb!”

(Whew.)

[florida80]

You’re A Cabron

California, Hospital, Language & Words, USA | Healthy | November 10, 2017


(I, and two friends, go to visit a friend in the hospital. We know his room number, but it doesn’t correlate to the floor he is on, so we head back down to reception to find that out. When we get there, there are people ahead of us. One of them rips into the receptionist (who is in a security guard uniform) because they hadn’t been speaking English. At least half the population of Orange County speaks Spanish, if not natively, very fluently, like most of southern California. I offer my opinion:)

Me: “I think the basic problem here is that you’re an a**-hole.”

Man: “You think I’m an a**-hole because I think they should speak English?”

Me: “Yes. That’s why I think you’re an a**-hole.”

(He tries to offer up every racist justification in the book, and in reply to each one, I say:)

Me: “And you’re an a**-hole.”

(After about 30 seconds of being reminded just what part of the human anatomy he was, he got disgusted and left. I didn’t notice it at the time, but apparently the receptionist/security guard spent the entire time trying desperately not to laugh, and nearly succeeding. I sincerely hope she went home and told her family the story over dinner — in Spanish.)

[florida80]

Eminem Would Have Problems

Hospital, Language & Words, The Netherlands | Healthy | November 9, 2017


(I have just moved to the Netherlands, so my Dutch is not very strong and I generally hope nobody ever asks me questions. This leads to little problems, such as when becoming member of the local hospital:)

Receptionist: “Okay, that’s all set, now I just need your postal code and we’re done.”

Me: “Uh yes, it’s ‘1234AM’.”

Receptionist: “‘N’ for Nico or ‘M’ for Minnie?”

Me: “What?”

Receptionist: “The last letter. Is it an ‘N’ for Nico, or an ‘M’ for Minnie?”

Me: *slightly panicking from questions* “Right, yeah, M for Mico. That one.”

Receptionist: “…so, M for Minnie. Got it.”

[florida80]

It’s A Gay Mole-Hunt

LGBTQ, Medical Office, UK | Healthy | November 9, 2017


(I have gone to the doctor’s about a mole I am suspicious of. I have spent close to five minutes with the doctor going over what seems different about it, and showing her pictures of it before I noticed the change. I keep pictures of my moles because my mum was diagnosed earlier in life, and it has made me rather paranoid about them. The doctor has done nothing but listen, smile, and “hmm…” every now and again. She stops me mid-sentence.)

Doctor: “Are you gay?”

Me: “What?”

Doctor: “Are you gay?”

Me: “Yes. Does that have something to do with my mole?”

Doctor: “No, it’s just my family thinks my nephew might be gay, and I’m wondering if you want to help me find out.”

Me: *stunned* “No, I don’t. I want to find out whether my mole changing means I have cancer.”

Doctor: “That’s a shame. We really want to know.”

(She sits there not focusing on anything for a few seconds.)

Me: “My mole?”

Doctor: *sitting upright* “Look, will you help me or not?”

(I didn’t answer and left the room. I made a complaint before leaving and ended up signing with a new doctor. I got a letter from the old doctor apologising for her behaviour, but my mum tells me she still works there, and is still trying to find out if her nephew is gay.)

[florida80]

Your Wisdom Is Toothless

Dentist, Massachusetts, USA | Healthy | November 9, 2017


(I am visiting an oral surgeon for the first time after getting a referral from my dentist for severe jaw pain that has been an issue for years.)

Me: “My jaw clicks when I open my mouth, and it hurts a lot if I try to keep my mouth open for a long time.”

Doctor: “Okay, let’s take some X-rays.”

(We take the X-rays and the doctor comes back to me.)

Doctor: “This issue is not something that I would recommend surgery for; it won’t fix the problem. But you do have impacted wisdom teeth.”

Me: “Okay, what would you recommend for the jaw pain? And I know the top right wisdom tooth has been causing me a lot of pain as well. I was going to get a referral for that.”

Doctor: “I won’t operate on your jaw for the jaw pain. It won’t help.”

Me: “Okay, but is there anything you can recommend that might help?”

Doctor: “I won’t do surgery unless I think it will help, and in this case it won’t help.”

(Repeat me asking for something besides surgery a few more times with the same answer.)

Doctor: “Okay, I’m going to see if we can get approval from the insurance for the wisdom teeth. You should hear back from us in a few weeks to schedule an appointment.”

(Fast forward a few weeks. I get a letter in the mail saying I have been approved to have three of my wisdom teeth removed, with no mention of the fourth (the only one that was bothering me). Never went back. Why would I trust someone to do surgery on me when they are incapable of listening to anything I said?)

[florida80]

That’s The Worst Tasting Peanut Butter Ever

California, Medical Office, Sacramento, USA | Healthy | November 8, 2017


(I’m working with the nephrologist at our clinic when I read an exchange between her and a lab tech in our EMR system.)

Lab Tech: “Patient was given a jug for collecting the 24-hour urine test but was unable to fit the total volume in the jug, so she put the rest in a peanut butter jar. Please re-order test as this is an unacceptable container and will have to be re-done. We will give her two jugs.”

Nephrologist: “Test re-ordered. Hopefully no more peanut butter jars this time…”

(The 24-hour urine test comes with patient instructions that say in big bold letters not to use any container but the jugs provided, and to get another jug if needed.)

[florida80]

You’ve Got Things Back To Front

Canada, Manitoba, Pharmacy, Winnipeg | Healthy | November 8, 2017


(At our pharmacy we have cashiers who run the till when customers pick up their prescriptions. The cashiers have no pharmacy school education. A woman is picking up an antibiotic for a urinary tract infection.)

Customer: *in a loud voice* “I keep getting these urinary tract infections!”

Cashier: *awkwardly* “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.”

Customer: *still very loud* “Do you think it’s because I wipe from back to front? They say you shouldn’t but I’ve done it all my life!”

Cashier: *trying very hard to remain professional* “Er… I really couldn’t say.”

(Meanwhile the rest of the staff are trying very hard not to laugh out loud.)

[florida80]

And Every Male Reader Just Crossed His Legs

Bookstore, Pennsylvania, USA | Healthy | November 8, 2017


(A lady calls into our bookstore. We are a private, Christian, non-profit organization. She wants to know about circumcision and any materials pertaining to that subject. I am confused as to why she wants it.)

Lady: “Hi, do you guys have any books on circumcision?”

Me: “Uh… no. That is mainly a Jewish practice, started in the Old Testament by Abraham and his family as a holy covenant with God.”

Lady: “That’s fascinating! Well, my nephew has just been born and the family was talking about it, and I didn’t know what it was. Every time I ask they avoid the subject with me.”

(After explaining to her what it was and why people did it, I told her that the practice today is done by a trained professional called the Mohel or by a medical professional.)

Lady: “So, it’s not as bad as it sounds! So do you think I could do it on my boyfriend? Here he is now!”

(Her boyfriend apparently walked into the room. She proceeded to check his penis to see if he was circumcised and tell me the gory details over the phone.)

Lady: “Can it be done with some scissors?”

Me: “Um… no… you would have to go to the hospital for that.”

Lady: “But you said it was not that bad!”

Me: “Yes, but if it’s not done right you can seriously hurt your boyfriend.”

Lady: “Oh. But Abraham did it with a knife!”

Me: “That was a long time ago and I’m sure he had divine intervention to help him!”

[florida80]

A Miscarriage Of Justice

Medical Office, Texas, USA | Healthy | November 7, 2017


(My husband and I have recently found out we’re pregnant. We’re excited but also nervous since a year before I had a traumatizing and painful miscarriage. We’re at the clinic where three weeks prior they did an ultrasound but said it was too early. But upon our return this ultrasound showed a fetus but no growth or heartbeat. We’re devastated to say the least. My husband had to step out for a few minutes. The doctor comes back in with blood test results.)

Doctor: “Your choices are to miscarry naturally or have a procedure for it to get taken out. My schedule is tight so we may need to try naturally first.”

Me: “Isn’t it… dangerous for me to try naturally, given my history?”

Doctor: *heavy sigh* “All right, we’ll schedule you for next week when I have an opening. [Nurse] will give you a packet of the information. You’ll be put under so as usual, no food or drink after midnight and no alcohol or recreational drugs 48 hours before. So for the next few days PARTAY IT UP! It’ll probably make you feel better.”

(He then puts his hand on my leg, which I’ve made clear I can’t stand people touching me.)

Me: *trying to keep from bawling* “You are a psychopath. Come near me and I will take your stethoscope and shove it so far up your a** you can hear your own heartbeat, if you have one. I’m going to go find a real doctor.”

(I ran out of there as fast as I could, found my now confused, then angry, husband, and left. I spent an hour in the car crying my eyes out, which might have been eased had I a doctor with empathy. I later found a different doctor that handled the situation properly and discovered the first doctor’s practice was eventually shut down due to fraud and malpractice. Good riddance.)

[florida80]

Idiot Number One

Medical Office, Tennessee, USA | Healthy | November 7, 2017


(I’m a nurse and am bringing a patient back to do blood pressure, temperature, and a urine check before they see the doctor.)

Me: “All right, ma’am, this is going to be your room, but do you feel as if you could pee in a cup for me real quick?”

Patient: “No, not right now.”

Me: “That all right! I’ll be right back with my blood pressure cuff to check your blood pressure, okay? We can get you some water to drink after that.”

Patient: “Okay, but I really need to pee, and do you need me to save any of it to check for infection?”

[florida80]

Inject A Little Compassion

Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 7, 2017


(My 12-year-old friend has many physical health problems, so she has to be at the hospital a lot. She has had many surgeries and medical procedures, and therefore has built up a bit of pain tolerance as well as being able to go for longer periods of time without food. My friend and her mom get onto the elevator. My friend has eaten nothing for over a day; she is very tired, and we all had a long day at school with lots of work and homework. Before the operation, she has to take a medication. She has a fear of needles, so she always takes medication via pill when she can. This takes longer, as the pill needs longer to work, but they are scheduled accordingly.)

Doctor: “Let me get the shot.”

Friend’s Mom: “Actually, she request—”

Doctor: “Ugh, she doesn’t need to do that. She’s not a little kid!”

Nurse #1: “Actually, they requested the pill, because [Friend] has anxiety and we don’t want her to have a panic attack before surgery.”

Doctor: “She needs to stop being a special snowflake and grow up!”

Friend: “I was diagnosed by Dr. [Name] seven years ago. Do you think I want panic attacks?”

Doctor: “Fine.”

(The doctor goes to get the medication. My friend’s mom and the nurse leave the room. Suddenly the doctor rushes out and sticks her with the needle.)

Friend: *is taken by surprise and tenses up, making the shot hurt more, and starts to have a panic attack*

Friend’s Mom & Nurses: “What’s going on?!”

([Nurses #1 and #2] rush to help [Friend].)

Friend’s Mom: “What the f*** are you doing?!”

Doctor: “She’s just a stupid kid! You don’t know anything about medicine anyway!”

Friend’s Mom: “I’m a nurse! I WORK here!”

(They did the surgery, and it turned out the pain medication didn’t work too well because the doctor injected it wrong.)

[florida80]

Juiced Up On Idiocy

Hospital, New Jersey, USA | Healthy | November 6, 2017


(I’m a nurse working on a medical-surgical floor. One night, I am assigned to a certain patient who is known to be extremely difficult, and honestly, a bit of an idiot. He is very uncooperative, and won’t even let us put an IV in him. He has a mess of medical problems, particularly uncontrolled diabetes. We check all diabetics’ blood sugar levels throughout the day in order to control their levels with insulin shots.)

Me: “Good morning. I have to check your blood sugar.”

Patient: “Whatever.”

(I check the level and it’s shockingly low. A normal blood sugar level is 60 – 120. His is 40.)

Me: “Sir, your sugar is very low. Let me get you some juice to boost it up.”

Patient: “I can’t drink juice. I’m diabetic.”

Me: “Yes, but in this case, juice will help boost your sugar quickly. We don’t want it to drop any lower. Lemme get you orange juice, okay?”

Patient: “Fine.”

Me: *comes back later with a cup of OJ* “Here.”

Patient: “I don’t want that.”

Me: “Sir, I just told you that you need to take some juice for your sugar.”

Patient: “I don’t like OJ.”

Me: *a little annoyed that he didn’t tell me so in the first place* “All right. What will you take?”

Patient: *after a few minutes thinking* “I want apple juice.”

Me: “Fine.” *leaves and comes back with apple juice* “Here. Drink this.”

Patient: “I don’t want that.”

Me: *at this point, I’m in complete disbelief* “Sir, you just told me you would drink if I got you apple juice instead of OJ!”

Patient: “I’m diabetic. I can’t drink juice.”

Me: “But your sugar is low and we really need to boost it up. It’s dangerous to have low blood sugar.”

Patient: *getting angry* “You can’t force me to do what I don’t wanna do! Don’t try to trick me into taking that juice! I don’t even like apple juice!”

(At this point, I’m about ready to throw the juice in his face. I leave the room just as the doctor passes by with some surgical students, asking what’s up. I explain the situation to the doctor.)

Doctor: “Let us talk to him.” *takes the juice from me and walks in with the students*

(I leave to take care of another patient. Five minutes later, I return to see the students coming out of the room one by one, all of them shaking their heads and chuckling. Finally the doctor comes out and I ask him if he took the juice.)

Doctor: *shakes his head* “That man is an absolute idiot. Just make sure he gets breakfast. If he passes out, let us know.”

[florida80]

A Cereal Snacker

Hospital, New Jersey, USA | Healthy | November 6, 2017


(I’m a hospital nurse. In my experience, some patients tend to see the hospital as some sort of medical hotel, where they’re allowed to ask for whatever they like whenever they like just because they’re sick.)

Patient: *at two in the morning, at the other end of the unit* “HEY! HEY! SOMEBODY HELP ME OUT!”

Me: *coming in, resisting the urge to smack him for waking up the d*** unit instead of just using his call bell* “Yes, sir, how can I help you?”

Patient: “I want cereal.”

Me: *utter disbelief* “Sir, it’s two in the morning. We don’t have any cereal.”

Patient: “Then go to the kitchen and get me some cereal.”

Me: “The kitchen is closed and won’t open until morning. You’ll have to wait until breakfast.”

Patient: “But I’m hungry now!”

(Keep in mind that this patient has a history of uncontrolled diabetes and has even lost a foot. He usually keeps a stash of food in his room against our advice, and his blood sugar is always extremely high due to snacking and refusing medications. We always try to limit his snacks to better control his sugar.)

Me: “Sir, you already had your dinner and your snack for tonight. You need to wait until morning. We don’t have any more snacks for you.”

Patient: “This is the worst hospital ever. First you try to poison me with your whacked drugs and then you wanna starve me all night long? Why can’t you give me any cereal?”

Me: *already past my limit and trying to keep an even tone* “Because this is a hospital, not a hotel. I’m not your maid; I’m your nurse. I’m not here to enable your bad habits and give you whatever you want just because you want it. I’m here to help you maintain your health. But you’ve been uncooperative, rude, and downright disrespectful. You don’t like how things are here? You have the right to refuse. And you have the right to leave. But you can guarantee that you will be back. And you keep heading down this path, you can also bet that you’re gonna have more problems, too.”

Patient: “…”

Me: “…”

Patient: “…I’ll go to sleep and wait for breakfast, then.”

[florida80]

Pink Eye To Your Red Face

British Columbia, Canada, College & University, Medical Office | Healthy | November 6, 2017


(I’m in my second year of university, working part time and in full courses for science with labs. I don’t exactly have free time at convenient hours, so I decide to go to the doctor on campus to confirm my suspicion. They ask me to fill out a form covering the basics, including pregnancy, STDs, allergies, and a list of symptoms. I make it quite clear what my issue is.)

Doctor: “Hello, [My Name]. How are you feeling?”

Me: “Not bad.”

Doctor: “Do you need a pregnancy test?”

Me: “Uh… no.”

Doctor: “Well, we can screen for STDs. It will take about a week to get results back.”

Me: “That’s… that’s not what I came in for.”

Doctor: “Oh.” *looks at chart* “Why are you here, then?”

Me: *points to my swollen closed eye and slightly swollen face* “I think I have pink eye?”

(I don’t really know how he missed it, but he wrote me the prescription for antibiotics and I went on my way.)

[florida80]

The Situation Is Agonizingly Fluid

Medical Office, Non-Dialogue, Pennsylvania, USA | Healthy | November 5, 2017


I had some issues with ovarian cysts when I was in high school, so I had to go in for a pelvic ultrasound. In the instructions we received prior the appointment I was told I needed to drink 32 oz of water before coming in so that my bladder would be full, which helps them to get better images. Now, I was 15 and very skinny. I had just gone through a growth spurt and at 5’5″ I weighed in around 100 pounds. I drank the water and immediately had to pee; I looked down, my pelvic area was bulging already. This was 10 minutes after I drank the water, right as we were leaving, and it was a 30 minute drive to the office.

Needless to say, that drive, through a bumpy, uneven construction site, was miserable. I was in such physical pain by the time we got to the doctor that I was in tears sitting in the waiting room. When I finally got called back to the ultrasound room and I lay down on the table, the ultrasound tech gave my visibly full bladder, by this point halfway to a pregnant belly, a bit of a side eye, but continued with her explanation of the procedure. I heard none of this, as all of my energy and focus were tied up in not urinating all over that table.

She begins the ultrasound, poking at the watery skin ball that is my pelvis, until after a few moments she stops. She can’t see anything. There’s too much liquid.

I ask her what to do and she tells me that I need to go to the bathroom (which was luckily adjacent to the exam room) and “pee a little, then stop” so that there would be a good amount of liquid for her. By this point, I have been in intense physical pain because of this full bladder for roughly an hour, so these instructions felt more than a little impossible. But, being a determined kid, I went in there and against all odds, I did it. So the rest of the ultrasound goes off without a hitch, and afterward I am finally able to fully relax my bladder for the first time that day.

As I was getting ready to leave, the technician asked me how much water I had been instructed to drink, and was appalled when I told her 32 oz. She went off about how they should’ve looked at my chart to see my height and weight because they would’ve been able to tell just from that that the amount should’ve been lower, and it was lucky that I was able to control my bladder so well; otherwise, the whole appointment would’ve been a waste.

A few days later my mom gets a call from the doctor’s office and guess what? Turns out the whole appointment was, in fact, a waste, since the notes were wrong in my file and the ultrasound tech performed an abdominal ultrasound instead of a pelvic one. I was less than pleased.

At least I knew not to drink so much water for the next one.

[florida80]

A Significant Shift In Moods

Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 4, 2017


(I work night shift in a hospital lab. On night shift, there are three working at a time with my same job title, which is the highest level of certification in the department, other than our medical director. In all, there are six night shifters with that certification for the entire fairly large specialty hospital, and if we can’t work, we figure it out with one of the three who are off. One night, due to family emergencies, sickness, and a coworker who “wasn’t in the mood to come to work today” (they were fired weeks later), I and one other end up working a night shift. I am filling in unexpectedly, and have just gotten off a flight that morning and haven’t slept in thirty hours by the time morning comes. The other coworker has a fever of 103; we make the executive decision that I’ll do anything requiring patient contact and if his fever goes above 104, we’ll call the ER downstairs. It also turns out to be what we call a “must be a full moon” night. By morning, we’re both almost crying from sheer exhaustion, sleep deprivation, and misery. Come morning, there is an employee appreciation breakfast.)

Day Shifter: “How was the night?”

Me: “I haven’t slept in thirty hours, [Coworker] has a fever of 103, four analyzers broke, the ICU is literally out of beds, they’re tripling up patients into the double rooms in MedSurg, and the ER is using the hallway as overflow for the waiting room.”

Day Shifter: “Well, we were wondering if you two could stay maybe an hour late so all the day shift could go to the breakfast?”

(We told them no way. They weren’t happy. At that point, we didn’t care.)

[florida80]

NovoPAIN!

Arkansas, Dentist, USA | Healthy | November 3, 2017


(I am having a filling in my tooth replaced with a new material.)

Me: “So, doctor, I’ve had problems in the past with Novocain not really working with the standard dose. I may need a slightly larger dose to fully numb the area up.”

Dentist: “It’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

(I do worry, but I decide maybe he’s using something a little stronger than I’ve been given before. He begins to drill out the current filling and I jump, because I can clearly feel the vibrations, when I know I shouldn’t.)

Me: “No, stop! It’s not numbed!”

Dentist: “No, that’s normal. Don’t worry.”

(He continues to drill, and I can FEEL IT. I squirm and yell and try to smack his arm with my free hand, but he just tells me to be still. He continues on, and for a brief moment, the pain is so intense, everything looks silver. So, I do the only thing I know that will stop him at this point. I bite him, which tears his latex glove.)

Dentist: “What was that for?!”

Me: “PAIN IS F****** SILVER!”

(In the end, I got my larger dose of Novocain to fully numb the area, and a note in my file that I need at least a dose and a half.)

[florida80]

A Needling Suspicion You Did That Wrong

Blood Donation, New Hampshire, USA | Healthy | November 3, 2017


(I am donating blood at a traveling clinic that has come to my college. I have a rather intense needle phobia and like to use donating blood as a way to get over this fear just as much as an opportunity to help others. However, when the needle is in me I become visibly tense and my breathing quickens. Sometimes the nurses worry that I am going to pass out or go into shock, so I always warn them about my fear, assure them that I will NOT pass out, that I’m just anxious, and ask them to count to three before they stick me, which reduces my anxiety. They are usually very understanding of this request.)

Nurse: “Okay, we’re all set now. You’re just going to feel a pinch and a sting.”

Me: “Can you please count before you do it?”

Nurse: *legitimately confused about this request* “Count? Why?”

Me: “I have a bit of a needle phobia. I’m not going to pass out; I just don’t want to be surprised by the needle.”

Nurse: *still with a confused expression* “Okay…”

(She then proceeds to count to three as fast as she can… WHILE she is already sticking me with the needle. Lo and behold, I panic, push myself several inches up in the chair, and feel tears begin to stream from my eyes involuntarily.)

Nurse: “Oh! Well, I didn’t know you were gonna jump up in your chair like that!”

(She leaves to tend to other donors. I begin to calm down, but tears are still streaming down my face as a result of the unpleasant surprise.)

Nurse: *coming back to check on me, notices my face* “Is… is something sad going on in your life right now?”

Me: “Nothing other than the nightmares I’m gonna have tonight…”

[florida80]

A Basin To Stick Your Face In

Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 3, 2017


(My nurse has just finished filling a basin so that I can take a sponge bath. I sit up to use it, and immediately throw up in the basin. First words out of her mouth:)

Nurse: “I’m so glad that basin was there.”

(If I wasn’t busy with sudden nausea I’d have laughed myself sick!)

[florida80]

Maybe Dying Doesn’t Seem So Bad

Clinic, USA | Healthy | November 2, 2017


(I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere. There is a small hospital, as well as a holistic health clinic. The answering machine for the holistic health clinic says:)

Clinic: “You have reached [Clinic]. We are open from [time] to [time]. If it’s an emergency, go to the hospital in [City a little over an hour away]. If you cannot make it to that hospital, go to the hospital in [Smaller City around 40 minutes away]. ONLY IF YOU WILL NOT LIVE to get to that hospital should you go to the local hospital. In that case, good luck… Please leave a message after the beep.”

(The unfortunate thing is they are quite right. While the staff seem nice enough, they have so little practice that they really aren’t any good. I got a small gash in my knee once, and needed stitches. Somehow the remaining scar is now double the size of the original gash. Since then I’ve always made a point to go to a different hospital if I need medical care.)

[florida80]

A Meat Coochie Would Have Just Been Too Much

Food & Drink, Hospital, Language & Words, USA, Washington | Healthy | November 2, 2017


(I work at a hospital, and it’s my job to get the food orders for all the patients. This occurs one morning during the breakfast rush.)

Me: “Hi, thank you for calling room service. My name is [My Name]. Can I get your name and room number, please?”

(The patient tells me their name and room number.)

Me: “All right, what can I get for you this morning!”

Patient: “I want the coochie!”

Me: “I’m sorry… you want what?”

Patient: “The coochie! The vegetable coochie!”

Me: “The… quiche?”

Patient: “Yeah, that!”

(The rest of the order went on normally, but I had to mute myself because I was laughing so hard.)

[florida80]

Your Plan Doesn’t Have A Leg To Stand On

Florida, Hospital, USA | Healthy | November 1, 2017


(My aunt is pregnant with my cousin after years of miscarriages and a stillbirth. She’s at one of her ultrasounds when the doctor notices something weird.)

Doctor: “I think your baby is malformed.”

Aunt: “What are you talking about?”

Doctor: “I mean she isn’t developing properly. She might be born disfigured.”

Aunt: “How bad are we talking? She’s not going to die, is she?”

Doctor: “I can’t tell for certain, but it looks like she’s missing a leg.”

Aunt: “What?! What do you mean my baby is missing a leg?!”

Doctor: “I mean unless it’s hidden somewhere, it’s gone.”

(Over the next few weeks the doctor subtly implied over and over again that she should terminate the pregnancy due to the malformation. She ended up switching doctors when he got fed up and straight up told her to terminate because apparently allowing a child to exist with a deformity was akin to abuse. When she gave birth, my cousin indeed only had one leg. She learned how to walk with a prosthetic at a very young age and is now 23, athletic, and happy, and you wouldn’t know she only had one leg if she didn’t show you her prosthetic. We’re all still horrified that the doctor thought terminating her in the name of “protecting” her was the only course of action, especially after my aunt and uncle had suffered so many previous losses.)

[florida80]

When Collecting Becomes A Disease

Canada, Hospital, Ontario | Healthy | November 1, 2017


(I’m the weird one here. I’m speaking to my doctor about getting caught up on my vaccines.)

Doctor: “So, what brings you in today?”

Me: *off the top of my head* “I have measles, mumps, rubella, tetanus, and meningitis. Should I get hepatitis or HPV next?”

Doctor: *giving me a strange look* “I’m sorry, what do you mean?”

Me: *realizing how I just worded that* “VACCINES! I want to get all my immunizations.”

[florida80]

Hard To Swallow That He Doesn’t Realize

Medical Office, New York, Rude & Risque, USA | Healthy | November 1, 2017


(I am getting X-rays done because I’m going to have a procedure done soon. Beforehand they make you drink this thick gooey liquid that supposedly makes it easier to take the X-rays. Before the doctor comes in, the nurse is asking me some preliminary questions.)

Nurse: “Do you have any difficulty swallowing?”

(Being as immature as I am, I have to try really hard to contain my laughter in order to answer no. Then the doctor comes in:)

Doctor: “Do you have any difficulty swallowing?”

(I try really hard not to laugh and say no.)

Doctor: “Are you sure? I’m gonna give you this thick liquid to swallow; it’s gonna feel a little slimy as it goes down your throat.”

(I can’t help it and crack up.)

Doctor: “Oooookay, I guess I’m going to have to describe this a different way. You’re the fifth person today that laughs when I explain this process, and that’s not even including the new nurse in training.”

[florida80]

The Workforce Is Strong With This One

Drug Store, Pharmacy | Healthy | October 31, 2017


(We have a giant inflatable ghost on display for Halloween. It doesn’t quite sit right and tends to lean to the side, so we frequently adjust it.)

Coworker: “[My name]! The ghost is falling again.”

Me: “Okay…”

(We spend about five minutes fiddling with it, until we get it to sit up right.)

Coworker: “Oh, no. His ascot got flipped backwards.”

(We proceed to grab boxes and stick-like things, trying to flip the ascot back around to no avail.)

Me: “OH! I’ve got it!”

(I run away with no explanation and return with a toy extendable lightsaber. I make the “vwing” noise and I flick it and extend the lightsaber. I succeed in straightening the ghost’s tie on the first attempt.)

Coworker: “…You just fixed the ascot of an inflatable ghost with a lightsaber.”

Me: “I love this job.”

[florida80]

He’ll Be In The Afterlife After The Birth

Hospital | Healthy | October 31, 2017


(It is Halloween. The hospital staff have put up decorations, but they’re minimal. I’m trying to wheel a patient who is in labor, to the room she was assigned, along with her husband.)

Patient’s Husband: “We should put her in the room with the witch hanging over the door.”

Me: “I’m sorry. That room’s actually a different size. I’m supposed to take you to room 79.”

Patient’s Husband: “But that room has a ghost. She wants a witch.”

Me: “The only room we have with that decoration is half the size of this one, and doesn’t have all the same equipment in it. This is the room you paid for.”

Patient’s Husband: “It has to be a witch. She’s been real nasty all week.”

(As she hears her husband say this, the wife is looking less and less pleased. She is a week overdue, and has been in for false labor pains the past two weeks.)

Me: “That’s interesting, but there aren’t any decorations inside the room anyway. What is inside this room is a much wider space for the doctor and nurses to provide her with better care.”

Patient’s Husband: “She wants a witch, so put her in the room with the witch.”

(Finally, the patient has had enough and speaks up.)

Patient: “Shut up. I want to get this kid out in whatever room the people who know what they’re doing think is best, you dumb troll!”

[florida80]

The Trouble With Trekkies

Clinic | Healthy | October 31, 2017


(During Halloween at my clinic, my boss allows us to dress up a little. Being a Star Trek fan, I wear a Starfleet medical uniform and download a Star Trek soundboard app on my phone.)

Patient: “Hello, sir, I am [name] and I’m here to see Dr. [name].”

Me: “Oh, yes, I have you here right on time. Just have a seat and we’ll call you soon.”

Patient: “Well, while you’re here, I don’t suppose you can scan me with your tricorder to see?”

Me: “Well, if you want me to!”

(I open my soundboard and start playing the tricorder sound as I start scanning him.)

Patient: “Hahaha! Oh, my god! I am laughing so hard, my chest is hurting!”

Coworker: “[My name], you’re such a nerd.”

Me: “I believe that goes with the uniform I’m wearing.”

[florida80]

How To Expline This To You

Australia, Hospital, Language & Words | Healthy | October 30, 2017


(Making bookings for patients is very easy. All I need is name, phone, modality, body part, and doctor name. I’ve been on the phone for a few minutes, the patient telling me a rather detailed explanation why she needs a scan of her back, yet not telling me anything I need to know. I’m polite, don’t interrupt, but I am spending too much time on this call and my coworker needs help with patients lined up.)

Me: “Okay. That doesn’t sound good. Did your doctor want an x-ray, ultrasound, or CT?”

Patient: “Scan of my back. My back.”

Me: “On your form your doctor gave you, did they write X.R., C.T. or U.S. anywhere?”

anguMe: “The paper the doctor gave you. Can you read it to me?”

Patient: “I have a paper. It says nothing.”

Me: *still very polite* “It doesn’t have your name on it? Not the doctor’s name and signature?”

Patient: “Yes. My name is [Patient].”

Me: *I can’t take it down until I know what they need and what room to start in, so I make a mental note for later* “Okay. Now the paper has nothing on it?” *I know it’s repetitive, but I have to confirm for what I have to say next if it’s true*

Patient: “Nothing. There’s nothing!”

Me: “Okay. So that means it’s invalid. You’d need to go to the doctors and get him to write you a referral.”

Patient: “It’s here!” *she’s now livid* ‘No! No. No. It says here!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Patient: “It says X.R. spline—” *yes, s.p.l.i.n.e.* “—Lubosac; my back!”

(I gathered it was an x-ray lumbosacral spine, but don’t you just love how information materialises?)

[florida80]

Radiating Pure Incompetence

Health & Body, Office, Text/Chat/Email, UK | Healthy | October 30, 2017


(I work for the safety department overseeing several sites that my company is working on. I mainly focus on radiation exposure. We receive daily reports of exposure for all men working in radioactive areas with personal dosimeters that record in real time. Each site has one person who collates the information before passing it on. One site has recently had to employ a new person. He has sent the information through and I notice a problem. I reply to his email.)

Me: “[Person], is this information correct?”

Person: “Yes. It is correct.”

Me: “Okay. I thought I would check as many of your workers have far exceeded the legal limit in just one day. Has there been an incident?”

Person: “No. No incident. The information is correct. I have checked with dosimetry on site, and they confirm.”

(I don’t believe him, so I email the safety manager on site just to double check, but he doesn’t respond. I decide to pry further.)

Me: “[Person], can I assume that the workers have been sent home with pay? I will need to report this.”

Person: “No. They’re still working. I won’t be able to reach them until they finish.”

Me: “Well, you’re going to have to. They have far exceeded the legal limit for a year’s worth of exposure. As per policy, this will have to be reported and they will need to be monitored. Can you please check with [Safety Manager]?”

Person: “It’s just one Sievert! And no, [Safety Manager] is in a meeting.”

Me: “[Person], a Sievert is a large dose. We work in micro and millisieverts. Are you absolutely certain this information is correct?”

Person: “The information IS correct. That is the end of it!”

(I was even less convinced and spoke to my manager. He contacted the site manager and it was decided that the workers be sent home and everyone pulled off until the matter was resolved. It turned out no one there thought it necessary to train the new person, despite him having no experience with ionising radiation. The workers were only exposed to a few microseiverts and they were allowed to return to work. This incident reflected so badly on us it risked our contract with the site, and the manager, safety manager, and the new person were relocated. I got landed with the new person, and he’s made it his life goal to make my life miserable, as payment for his and his managers’ mistake.)

[florida80]

A Disheartening Way To Treat The Issue

Australia, Car, Health & Body, New South Wales, Parents/Guardians | Healthy | October 30, 2017


(I have a day off so I wasn’t planning on doing much other than sleeping in. At about 9:30 am I get a call from my dad.)

Dad: “Hey, sweetie, are you doing anything at the moment?”

Me: *lying in bed* “No, not anything important. Whats up?”

Dad: “The coolant hose has come loose on the car again. Could I get you to come pick me up to get some more coolant?”

Me: “Yeah, sure, no problem.”

(I go and get him, chatting about inconsequential things, asking about each others’ weekends. We get the coolant and we are heading back to his car. This happens about half an hour after I pick him up.)

Dad: “Yeah, I wasn’t feeling that great this morning… About an hour ago I started getting chest pain and was thinking I should go to the hospital, but I’m feeling okay now so maybe I should just go home.”

Me: *being sceptical in my head* “Nah, if you were worried, Dad, I’d go up there. I will go with you if you’d like. I’ll stay with you. It can get kinda boring up there by yourself.”

Dad: “Oh, well, only if you’re not doing anything. It might be a good idea.”

Me: “Sure thing; it’s better to be safe than sorry.”

Dad: “Only if you’re sure you’re not doing anything

Me: “I’m sure; I will meet you up there.”

(I follow him up only to find a parking space at the bottom of the hill, so we walk up to the top and get admitted into ED. Long story short, Dad had had a minor heart attack, three in fact, the last one as we were walking up the hill, and he just wanted to go home. I spent five hours with him, him asking me not to tell any family members because he didn’t want to stress them out. Mum nearly had a heart attack herself when she found out, mainly because he waited five hours to tell her! Please, please, people — get it checked out sooner rather than later!)

[florida80]

Drugs Make You Quackers

Chicago, Illinois, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | October 29, 2017


(My mom is a nurse practitioner at a health clinic primarily for homeless people. Naturally she has some interesting exchanges with her patients. Her favorite one to tell is about a patient who had come in for the first time, and she was asking all the preliminary questions.)

Mom: “Do you have any allergies?”

Patient: “I’m allergic to penicillin.”

Mom: “What sort of reaction do you have when you take it?”

Patient: “It makes me talk like Donald Duck.”

(After trying to hold in laughter, my mom had to explain to him that while his “reaction” was more of a mild mutation, it was not considered a harmful allergy. It’s her favorite story to tell next to the woman who referred to the lice on her head as “movable dandruff.”)

[florida80]

BerEFT Of Paying

Australia, Hospital, Reception | Healthy | October 28, 2017


(At the end of a visit patients return to the front desk to settle accounts. Our EFT Machine likes to be difficult sometimes so I do as much as I can on it so the patient doesn’t get confused.)

Me: “Okay, was that cheque, savings, or credit?”

Patient: “Credit.”

(I select credit and put the EFT Machine in front of them.)

Me: “Pin, please.”

(I look away. After hearing only four beeps, each button pressed beeps — four for the pin and one for enter — I go ahead and visually see only three buttons of the pin were entered. I press the yellow button once to erase it.)

Me: “Pin again, please. The buttons tend to stick.”

(Again I hear only four beeps and visually check. I repeat pressing the yellow button once.)

Me: “Once more, please. Really press down.”

(I hear four beeps again, but before I can press the yellow button the patient notices and presses it three times quickly. The machine makes an error beep and a big cross comes on the screen that cancels the payment.)

Me: “Okay. We only need to press that once. Let’s start again.”

(Little things like this that tend to be unnecessary mistakes and use more time than it should. Another example:)

Me: “Was that cheque, savings, or credit?”

(I notice on the screen it says debit, but debit and credit can be selected as the same thing. Debit cards are used in place of credit cards when ordering online and such. The patient looks at me wide-eyed.)

Patient: “I don’t have credit!”

(They panic faster than I can explain. It was a slip of the tongue, habitual, and not really a fuss.)

Patient: “Don’t put it on credit! It’s not credit!”

(I internally sighed.)

[florida80]

Their Lack Of Professionalism Is An Eye-Sore

Insurance, Medical Office, Pennsylvania, USA | Healthy | October 27, 2017


(My eye insurance changes when I got a new job, so I need to find a new doctor for my contacts exam. I choose one in the same building as my previous job at a pharmacy, as I’ve met [Doctor], who is a really nice guy, and call to make an appointment.)

Me: “Hi, before I make an appointment, I want to confirm that you take my insurance?”

Receptionist: “Oh, the plan offered by the local hospital? Of course we do.”

(I’m scheduled for the next open appointment, three months away. Fast forward to the day of the appointment. She copies my insurance cards, and I wait for my exam.)

Nurse: “[My Name]. Good afternoon, the doctor will be in to see you shortly.”

(In walks a short, bald, bearded man, not the tall, thin, bespectacled fellow I knew from the pharmacy, but I figure perhaps [Doctor] has expanded his practice or has a fill-in today. He proceeds to do my exam and tells me my script will be up front, no niceties, no introduction.)

Me: “Thank you! And I’m sorry, but I didn’t catch your name.” *primarily so I know not to schedule an appointment with him again*

Doctor: “[Doctor], of course!”

Me: “Oh, I apologize. I mistook the taller gentleman with glasses for you.”

Doctor: “He’s just the optician.”

(Cue the end of the awkwardness, and I go up front to pay my copay and get my script.)

Receptionist: “That will be [amount nearly $300].”

Me: “What? Shouldn’t it be $50 with my insurance and deductible?”

Receptionist: “Oh, we only take your insurance for eye emergencies.”

Me: *pays with mouth agape*

(She knew they only took my insurance for emergencies and scheduled me for an obviously non-emergent appointment. Then she copied my cards, again not pointing out that it wouldn’t cover my visit. And the doctor was an unfriendly, cold fellow to boot. Needless to say I never went back, even though my insurance has now changed to something they universally accept.)

[florida80]

A Labor-Intensive Work Environment

Colorado, Fast Food, Health & Body, USA, Westminster | Healthy | October 27, 2017


(I am working the cash register at a fast food restaurant. A pregnant woman comes up to me.)

Woman: “Hi, I’m in labor right now. Can I get a big glass of ice water?”

Me: *not sure I heard her correctly* “I… what?”

Woman: “Yeah, I just had a big contraction. Can I get some water?”

Me: “Uh… yeah, totally. Of course.”

(I grab her a cup and begin filling it with ice and water.)

Me: *jokingly* “So you’re not going to have the kid here, are you? I don’t know how to do that.”

Woman: *smirking* “No, I’m not going to have it here. Though you would not believe how backed up the highway is.”

(I give her the water and she rushes out. Her voice was strained throughout the conversation which makes total sense. I later told a coworker what I’d just gone through.)

Coworker: “Yeah, it happens. I had a woman in labor go through the drive-thru once.” *confused* “So you’ve been working food service for ten years and you’ve never had that happen once?”

Me: “Uh… no!”

[florida80]

A Few Needling Problems

Dentist, UK | Healthy | October 27, 2017


(I have an appointment with the dentist.)

Dentist: “Okay, please sit down and we will get to it!”

(I sit down and she looks in my mouth. I see a syringe just out of my view.)

Me: “What’s the syringe for?”

Dentist: Don’t worry. It won’t hurt a bit, and then we can get to work.”

Me: “No, what is the syringe for?”

(She sticks her thumb in my mouth, feeling my gums. She lifts the syringe and I push hard against her.)

Dentist: “What’s wrong? We won’t be able to get that tooth out unless you’re numbed up!”

Me: “I’m not getting a tooth out!”

Dentist: *angry* “THEN WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?!”

(I don’t answer and just leave the room. As I leave the building I see her running up to me.)

Dentist: “Oh, you’re my 11 am! I can do your whitening. I’ll just need to get set up.”

Me: “I’m not letting you near my mouth again!”

(I registered with another dentist that week.)

[florida80]

There Are Prescribed Lunch Breaks

California, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | October 26, 2017


(I work in a pharmacy as an intern, and on the weekends, we only have one pharmacist on duty. It is company policy that employees have to take their unpaid lunch by the fifth hour on the clock. This happens when our pharmacist is out to lunch.)

Tech: “Hello there. Are you picking up or dropping off?”

Patient: “Picking up.”

Tech: “I’m sorry, but our pharmacist is on lunch. We can’t sell any prescriptions without a pharmacist here.”

Patient: “Why the h*** not?!”

Tech: “I’m sorry, but it is against the law for us to do that.”

Patient: “Just give it to me! I drove all the way here!”

Tech: “I can’t; it’s against the law, and we have to have a pharmacist here.”

Patient: “There should always be a pharmacist here; it’s a pharmacy! Why the h*** aren’t they here?!”

Tech: “She’s on her lunch right now. She’ll be back at 1:30, but I can’t do anything until then.”

Patient: “I want to talk to a manager!”

Tech: *calls manager*

Manager: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we can’t do anything until the pharmacist comes back from lunch. She has to take her lunch, too.”

Patient: “I’m complaining to corporate. What is their number? This is ridiculous!”

Manager: “It’s [number].”

(The patient storms off as the manager just shrugs.)

Manager: “Call all you want. What are they gonna do? Fire me for following the law?”

[florida80]

Check Comes With A Teleportation Fee

Illinois, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | October 26, 2017


(We get requests from companies requesting medical charts. We charge a fee to print and mail them. Charts are only mailed after receiving payment.)

Caller: “Hi, I’m calling from [Company] regarding the 25 chart review.”

Me: “Yes?”

Caller: “I was just wondering if you received the check yet?”

Me: *thinking maybe it came in today’s mail, which we hadn’t gotten yet* “When did you mail it?”

Caller: “Today.”

Me: “…then, no. We didn’t get it yet.”

[florida80]

Suddenly Anti-Antibiotic

Canada, Montreal, Pharmacy, Quebec | Healthy | October 26, 2017


Customer: “Hi, I’d like to fill this prescription, please.”

Me: “Very well, I’ll need your birthdate.”

Customer: “[Birthdate]. Hurry up, please.”

Me: “Any known allergies?”

Customer: “What? No! Look, it’s not my first time taking these pills. Just give it to me.”

Me: *taken aback* “Okay, sir, you may go in the waiting room.”

(A few minutes later the pharmacist explains the treatment to the customer.)

Pharmacist: “So, those pills are penicillin combined with another antibiotic—”

Customer: “Penicillin? What? I can’t take this! I’m deathly allergic to penicillin!”

[florida80]

1 Part Bleach To 100 Parts Stupidity, Part 2

Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, Pittsburgh, USA | Healthy | October 25, 2017


(I am a pharmacy technician, not qualified to recommend drugs or dispense advice. Any questions about actual medicine, I am required to pass off to a pharmacist, even if I think I know the answer.)

Me: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: *mumbling* “Um, I think I—” *mumbles* “—contact with bleach…”

Me: “I’m sorry, what? Could you repeat that?”

Customer: “I think I might have swallowed some bleach and was wondering if the pharmacist could recommend anything.”

Me: *trying not to look alarmed* “Well, if I were you, I would call the Poison Control Center, but I’ll check with the pharmacist.”

(I go back to the counter where the pharmacist is working.)

Me: “This guy says he might have ingested bleach and wants to know if you can recommend anything. I told him he should call the Poison Control Center.”

Pharmacist: “Yeah, that’s about it.”

(I go up to the front counter and repeat this advice to the customer.)

Customer: “Well, I drank some fluids and I’m feeling better now. I had some [soda], and some water, and some lemonade. My chest was hurting before but now it’s better. Do you know if bleach can make your chest hurt?”

Me: “Um… probably. If you swallowed bleach, it could hurt on the way down. You should probably call the Poison Control Center.”

Customer: “Eh, maybe I’ll call them tomorrow. If I’m not feeling better then, I can go to the emergency room, too.”

Me: “I would call them tonight if I were you, just to be safe. Do you want their number?”

(I write it down on the nearest piece of paper and hand it to him.)

Customer: “Yeah, thanks. I might call them tomorrow.”

(He wanders away, but comes back later. My coworker is an intern, studying to become a pharmacist, and gets to the counter first. I overhear their conversation.)

Customer: “I was wondering about water pills. What do they do?”

Coworker: “Um, they make you urinate.”

Customer: “Can I get some of those?”

Coworker: *realizing why he’s asking* “They don’t flush out your system; they’re used to lower blood pressure. And you would need a prescription.”

Customer: “Can I get one of those?”

Coworker: *bewildered* “We don’t give prescriptions here; we just fill them. You would need to go to a doctor.”

(The customer wanders away, apparently still confused about a lot of things.)

Me: “I hope he’s going to be okay.”

Pharmacist: “If he had really swallowed bleach, his throat would be burned. I don’t know what’s wrong with him, but there’s nothing else we can do.”

[florida80]

1 Part Bleach To 100 Parts Stupidity

Pet Store | Right | February 22, 2012


Me: “How are you today? I’m told you needed help with fish?”

Customer: “Yeah, all my fish died after I cleaned my tank yesterday. My husband says that it may have had to do with me using bleach, but I told him he was wrong.”

Me: “Well, actually he is right. Bleach leaves residue on the glass. Even after rinsing it, that can kill the fish.”

Customer: “But I didn’t even rinse it.”

Me: “What did you do, then?”

Customer: “I just added it to the water. How could that kill them?”

[florida80]

Your Boss Can Be A Real Swine

Bosses & Owners, Health & Body, Kentucky, Nursing Home, USA | Healthy | October 25, 2017


(I call in to my job as a certified nursing assistant at a nursing home. It is 2009.)

Me: “Hey, I can’t come in today because I have a fever of 104 and other flu symptoms.”

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “I can’t let you call in unless you come here and have a nurse take your temperature.”

Me: “What? I live 15 miles away. My fever is really high and I have really bad cold chills.”

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “You’ll probably get fired if you don’t come and let us take your temperature.”

(I drive the 15 miles to let them take my temperature. At this point, I’m almost hallucinating from the fever.)

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “Oh, your fever is 105 now.” *to other nurse* “Should she go home? We are kind of short today.”

Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “I don’t know. She could probably work.”

(I then collapse onto the chair, barely hearing them in a fever haze.)

Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “Well, maybe she should go home?”

Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “I guess so.” *to me* “You can go home, I guess. But get a doctor’s note.”

(I then drove home, barely coherent. After going to the doctor I found out that I had SWINE FLU, or H1N1. And they wanted me to come to work, endangering both myself and the elderly residents! I quit a few months later.)

[florida80]

Could Be Better

Medical Office, USA | Healthy | October 25, 2017


(I have a chronic illness and find myself going to the office where my GP, the walk-in clinic, and phlebotomy lab are all located. There are two attendants at the front doors that help patients in and out of vehicles and bring wheelchairs. Here in the South, it’s pretty typical for strangers to greet you as you walk past or even ask how you are. “Pretty good,” is the expected answer, no matter what.)

Attendant: “Mornin’. How’re you doing today?”

Me: “Eh. I’m here, aren’t I?”

Attendant: *beat* “Fair enough.”

[florida80]

The Uninsured Dead

Insurance, New Zealand, Pets & Animals, Text/Chat/Email, Zombies | Healthy | October 24, 2017


(A few months ago we signed up for pet insurance for all four of our animals. This month, we got caught by surprise by the payment and as a result, one of the payments did not process correctly. This is the email we got regarding the payment that did not process:)

Email: “Please call us on [number] or email us quoting [policy number] in regards to your insurance payment for your pet Zombie.”

(Punctuation is EVERYTHING.)

[florida80]

The Uninsured Dead

Insurance, New Zealand, Pets & Animals, Text/Chat/Email, Zombies | Healthy | October 24, 2017


(A few months ago we signed up for pet insurance for all four of our animals. This month, we got caught by surprise by the payment and as a result, one of the payments did not process correctly. This is the email we got regarding the payment that did not process:)

Email: “Please call us on [number] or email us quoting [policy number] in regards to your insurance payment for your pet Zombie.”

(Punctuation is EVERYTHING.)

[florida80]

Gauze And Effect

Canada, Health & Body, home, Marriage & Partners | Healthy | October 24, 2017


(I have a minor surgery on my foot. By chance, the only gauze the doctor has to wrap it is bright red. I head home after, and my husband is already home. He has some emergency first aid experience.)

Me: “Ugh, it hurts. I guess I should take my sock off, see if that eases some pressure.”

(I take my sock off slowly.)

Me: *fake surprise* “Whoah, that’s red!”

Husband: *stares blankly*

Me: “Aww, you’re no fun. I thought the red gauze would freak you out.”

Husband: “So it’s gauze?”

Me: “Yep. It’s all the doctor had. It startled me so I thought I’d try and get you, too. You’re not as surprised as I thought you’d be.”

Husband: *calmly* “I was screaming internally.”

(He was actually really upset. Whoops!)

[florida80]

About To Make A (Dis)Appointment

California, Medical Office, Sacramento, Time, USA | Healthy | October 24, 2017


(My multi-specialty medical office has an audiologist who does hearing tests for patients. I assist the ENT [Ear/Nose/Throat] doctors so I handle calls from his patients, since he doesn’t have his own assistant. One of our phone operators calls me at the nurses’ station with an audiology patient on the other line.)

Operator: “Dr. [Audiologist]’s 4:00 says she’s going to be ten minutes late. Is that okay?”

(We allow a 15-minute window to show up for appointments, and a check of the schedule reveals she’s the last patient of the day.)

Me: “Yes, that’s fine, as long as it’s no more than 15 minutes.”

(The operator relays the message and I go about my day. Later, I realize it’s 4:45 and the patient isn’t showing up as checked in on the schedule. I’m about to call up to the front desk to see if they’ve forgotten to check her in when the receptionist calls me.)

Receptionist: “Hi… did you tell Dr. [Audiologist]’s 4:00 that we’d ‘just work her in’ when she got here? Because she just got here.” *I can practically hear the air quotes*

Me: “I most certainly did not. I said no more than 15 minutes late. She needs to reschedule.”

Receptionist: “Yeah… that’s what I thought. Okay. I’m gonna go talk to [Audiologist]. Bet he’ll say the same thing.”

(He did. When the receptionist politely relayed to the patient that he was unable to stay 45 minutes late to accommodate her, she threw a hissy fit and ranted at our poor receptionist for several minutes before storming out in a snit. Her best line, as the receptionist later conveyed, was that she’d told our phone operator she was “on 50” and he should have known how far away she was. Highway 50 runs from West Sacramento to Maryland…)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 12

Medical Office, UK | Healthy | October 23, 2017


(This was a few years ago. I have made an appointment with a new GP to give me a contraceptive implant since I keep forgetting to take my pills and I want to be safe. This is my first time at this particular office.)

Doctor: “So I’m just going to numb the area first and then we’ll get the implant in there.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I roll up my sleeve and turn my head away.)

Doctor: “Are you all right?”

Me: “Oh, yeah, I just don’t like watching the needle go in. So I’m gonna look at that wall there.”

Doctor: “All right, then.”

(She then stuck the needle in and lifted the skin of my arm up with the needle as she removed it. When she apologized she attempted to do it again. Both times were quite painful but thankfully the needle didn’t break and the rest of the appointment went fine.)

Doctor: “Again, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened there. Maybe if you didn’t have such tiny arms!”

(Three years later I went to get my implant replaced. This time I got a nurse to do it. She did it completely pain-free on the first try. I guess my tiny arms weren’t a problem for the nurse.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 11

Health & Body, home, Nurses, Religion | Right | November 14, 2016


(I am an RN that goes around to people’s homes. I get an order to obtain a blood draw from a particularly religious patient who refuses to let me try anywhere except the tiny blood vessels in her hand. As I’m on my second attempt, apparently she thinks I need a little help…)

Patient: *loudly, with eyes closed* “Lord Jesus, help her find that blood! Send the blood to her Jesus; she needs your help! Draw her to that vein, oh Lord, and show your power!”

Me: *as I finally hit a vein* “Got it!”

Patient: “Thank you!”

Me: “You’re welcome!”

Patient: “Not you.”

Me: “A little bit me…”

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 10

Health & Body, Inspirational, Kind Strangers, Popular | Hopeless | June 13, 2016


(It’s my first day commuting to work off campus during summer term and I have a bike to get there. I’m feeling pretty good until three miles in, when it gets harder to keep going. All of a sudden, a van pulls over.)

Stranger: “Get in.”

Me: “I’m going to work and I really don’t—”

Stranger: “I’m a registered nurse and you’re showing signs of heat exhaustion. Get in now.”

(After stammering a bit, I let the RN put my bike in back and get me a water bottle.)

Me: “Thanks! I’m an out-of-state student so I’m not used to this heat.”

Stranger: “I get it. Do you need a ride home?”

(She showed up after my work and drove me home. I never saw her again, but I loved her.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 9

Awesome, Health & Body, Inspirational, Kind Strangers, Popular | Healthy | May 17, 2016


(My family is visiting my grandma, and we like renting bicycles to ride around the gated community where she lives. My mom and two younger siblings are just on our way back to the house. It’s a very hot day and I’m wearing a dark shirt.)

Me: “Hold up a minute. I feel woozy.”

(I pull onto the grass and sit down, panting, as my vision swirls with purple-green clouds. Usually they clear in a few moments, but they’re not going away. I can’t get back on the bike until I can see, so Mom is about to send my brother on ahead to bring Dad back with the car, when a car pulls up next to us.)

Little Old Lady: “Do you need help?”

(I’m a little fuzzy on the details after that point, but it turned out that she was a retired nurse! She offered to drive me back to Grandma’s house. I was doing a little better in the air-conditioned car, but I was still woozy and she talked to me to keep me awake. When we got to the house, I had to lean on her shoulder to get inside; my dad told me later that he thought I was helping her at first! She helped me into a reclining chair and got a cool, damp washcloth to put on my forehead before she left, with instructions to drink lots of water and not move for a while. She left before I could thank her, but I sent a thank-you note when I was better. Even after they retire, nurses are awesome people!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 8

Medical Office | Working | March 4, 2016


(During first full week of Advanced Placement and IB tests of my junior year in high school I find myself struck with a particularly nasty illness called norovirus, which causes nearly non-stop vomiting and diarrhea. I am home alone, as my father is out the whole week for business, and I am taking the bus to and from school for exams. Since I knew I cannot miss any of these tests on such short notice, I manage to tough it out for four days, but at that point I have not been able to eat or drink anything that remains in my stomach for more than five minutes. Severely dehydrated and weak, I finally decide to go to a close-by clinic for IV fluids after school. Since they need a doctor on-site to legally be able to give fluids, I call ahead.)

Nurse: “Hello, [Clinic]. This is [Nurse]. How may I help you?”

Me: *very quietly as my throat has started to develop acid sores* “Hi… Do you have the… Do you do IV fluids?”

Nurse: “What’s that, sweetie? I didn’t quite catch that.”

Me: “I need IV fluids… I really need them.”

Nurse: “Unfortunately we don’t have a doctor with us right now, hun.” *I start crying, since at this point I’m worried I will not be able to get out of bed tomorrow for my next exam* “Sweetie, what’s the matter? Are you hurt?”

Me: “No… I think I got norovirus from that restaurant that was shut down last week and I’m home alone and I have my AP tests that I can’t miss and I haven’t been able to eat or drink anything for days and I’m getting too weak to do anything! I can’t go to the ER because my dad didn’t leave me enough money to cover anything and I really need to go to my exam tomorrow!”

Nurse: “All right, sweetie, give me one second.” *the line is silent for about five minutes* “Okay, hun, here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to go out to you and pick you up, then we’re going to go to the [Clinic] downtown and get you your fluids. After that I’ll take you home and you give me your exam schedule. Is tomorrow your last day for exams until next week?”

Me: *shocked at her kindness* “Yes, ma’am.”

Nurse: “All righty. Then I’ll take you to your exam tomorrow morning and then we do need to check you into the hospital, all right, sweetie? Give me your address and I’ll be there in a few minutes. Call your dad and tell him what is going on, okay?”

(This nurse had negotiated with her supervisor to get the next two days off work so she could make sure I was taken care of and safe. After my exam the next day she picked me up and took me to the hospital, used a few personal favors to get me in quickly and hold off on payment, and stayed with me until my father could get there. We have since become good friends, and I am currently working on my own MD while volunteering at her clinic. This woman is why nurses really should rule the world!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 7

Hospital | Working | October 30, 2015


(I am pregnant and suffering from toxaemia, which is a form of blood poisoning. My blood pressure is extremely high and I have been admitted to hospital. I have been there for two weeks when my blood pressure goes even higher.)

Matron: “You have been scheduled for an emergency induction tomorrow morning; we can’t leave you like this for any longer.”

(Very early the next morning, she comes in and starts the preparation for the induction when a doctor comes in.)

Doctor: “[Matron], I need you to stop what you are doing. I need to speak to the patient. Please leave us alone.”

Matron: “Yes, doctor.” *leaves*

Doctor: *to me* “We are postponing your induction.”

Me: “But I’ve been told I have to have it.”

Doctor: “We’ve decided not to do it right now. It doesn’t really matter, seeing as this is elective.” *meaning I chose to have it done*

(He says nothing to reassure me and leaves. Later one of the nurses comes by.)

Nurse: “[My Name], what are you still doing here? I was sure you would have had your baby by now.”

Me: “Dr [Doctor] told me that it wasn’t being done, and told me it was elective.”

Nurse: “He said what? Did you elect to get pre-eclampsia? I’ll go and see what’s going on.”

(A few minutes later she is back.)

Nurse: “I found out why they postponed you. We only have four birthing rooms and there are a dozen screaming women down there waiting to get into them. You were considered stable enough to wait one more day”.

Me: “I would have understood if he said that.”

Nurse: “Yeah, doctors don’t think.”

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 6

Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Medical Office, Nurses | Working | December 9, 2013


(I’ve been sick this past week and I go to the clinic at nine am. They tell me they will call in the prescription at ten am. At two pm, I go to check the prescription.)

Pharmacist: “I have no prescription here under your name.”

Me: “The clinic said it would be ready by ten am. Let me call them.”

(I call the clinic.)

Me: “Hello. I have a prescription that hasn’t been put through yet. I need to make sure I am at the right pharmacy.”

(I am promptly transferred without a word to the women’s clinic line, which is the incorrect department. I am instructed to leave a message, as the nurses are out to lunch.)

Me: “Um, hi. I am [My Name]. I was just wondering where my prescription was sent. It’s not at the pharmacy and—” *I cough and my head immediately begins to ache terribly. I sniffle and tear up* “—if you could please help me that’d be nice.”

(I hang up and go home. At three pm I go to the clinic to verify the location of the pharmacy. They tell me the order has been sent, and to wait a couple hours. I go home yet again. At five pm I get a call from the women’s clinic number at which I left the message.)

Nurse: “Hello, is this [My Name]? You left a message a couple hours ago.”

Me: “Yes. I’m sorry, I was trying to find out where my prescription was. I already checked back with the clinic and they told me where the prescription would be.”

Nurse: “Everything’s all right, though? This is the wrong department for your call, but since you’ve had the prescription filled…”

Me: “Well… no… I called the pharmacy and the prescription still hasn’t been ordered yet.”

Nurse: “Oh. Let me get on that. I’ll make sure they get it filled out.”

Me: “Okay.”

Nurse: “I will call you back in a minute, sweetie.”

(The nurse hangs up and calls back a few minutes later.)

Nurse: “Okay, I’ve gotten them to fill out your prescription and the pharmacy should have it soon. You are taking [Medicine], which is two pills twice a day. No matter how bad it is, take all of them. You can take decongestants and ibuprofen to deal with the congestion and pain. And, honey, popsicles are your best friends. Drink lots of fluids and warm tea, and get plenty of rest.”

(At this point, the nurse’s concern has caused me to tear up.)

Me: “Thank you so much! I’ve been dealing with this for a week.”

Nurse: “You just sound so sick, sweetie. I called the pharmacy and told them to work extra quick on your order. The pharmacist’s name is [Name]. She’ll have your prescription ready as soon as she can.”

Me: “Thank you.”

Nurse: “You feel better, honey.”

(To that nurse: You had me sobbing. You cared so much and it wasn’t even your department. You helped me and told me more about my medicine than the doctor in the CORRECT department did. I’m so grateful there are people as nice as you working in the women’s clinic!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 5

Bullies, Hospital, Nurses, Parents/Guardians, Wild & Unruly | Right | August 13, 2013


(I’m 18, and have been hospitalized for a severe case of mono. As a result of the illness, my throat is badly swollen and I can hardly speak. I’m on lots of painkillers. I’m sharing a room with a boy who swallowed a rock. The boy has been screaming since his mother left and his father can’t quiet him down.)

Nurse: “Okay, [My Name], I’m just going to check your vitals.”

Me: *whispering* “How much longer until I can have more pain medication?”

Nurse: “Not for a while, sweetie.”

(The nurse leaves. The boy’s father has been watching us the whole time.)

Boy’s Father: “Listen, you little b****! Don’t you f****** gossip about me to the f****** nurses! You keep your f****** mouth shut, or I’ll shut it for you!”

(I’m stunned, as I haven’t said a word to or about him. As I can’t move and can barely speak, I’m in tears and terrified. Not long after, my mom comes in to visit.)

Mom: “Hey, [My Name]. How are you doing?”

Me: *crying and whispering* “Mom, the dad of that boy screamed at me. He said to shut up, or he’d shut me up.”

(My mom is silent, but clearly fuming. She leaves for a moment.)

Boy’s Father: “WHAT DID I SAY?!”

(Just then, my mom comes back with security in tow.)

Mom: “Escort him from hospital grounds NOW.”

Boy’s Father: “B****! You can’t tell me what to do! You aren’t the boss here! I’m twenty-f******-five!”

Mom: “Actually, I AM the boss here! It’s my day off, but I’m head nurse on this floor, and if you EVER speak to my daughter ever again, I will have you arrested so fast that you won’t ever hear the sirens! And by the way, I’m forty-freaking-eight and I have the good sense not to let my kids eat rocks!”

(The man was removed from hospital grounds and was banned from re-entering for 48 hours unless it was an emergency. I have the best mom in the world.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 4

Restaurant | Right | June 14, 2013


(My mother takes my younger brother and me out to a restaurant for dinner. As we are eating we witness a car crash in the road. My mother, being an LPN (licensed practical nurse), leaves her meal to rush across the street to offer help. We are seated by an elderly couple right next to a window.)

Elderly Man: “Did your mom just go out there to help them?”

Me: “Oh, well, she’s a nurse. Pretty much anytime an accident occurs and she’s there, she tries to help.”

Restaurant Proprietor: “That’s your mother out there?”

Little Brother: “Yeah. Our mom’s a nurse, so she went to help out.”

Restaurant Proprietor: “Wow! How cool!”

(My mother spends the next 30 minutes out in the middle of traffic, helping both drivers with their injuries, and waiting until EMTs arrive. She comes back in, and we resume our meal like nothing has happened.)

Elderly Woman: “Are they okay?”

Mom: “Yeah, but the poor girl — her parents are out of town. She has to wait in the hospital for them to come and see her. She pulled out, and that guy pulled out in front of her and rammed her car.”

Elderly Woman: “Well, at least they’re okay.”

(Another 20 minutes pass while my mother finishes her meal and the check is brought out to us. As the proprietor from earlier leaves the check, the couple next to us get up to leave.)

Elderly Man: “Let me tell you something…”

(He quickly snatches the check off of our table.)

Elderly Man: “If I were in an accident like that and needed help, I would want you to come and help me. Anyone who selflessly dodges traffic to help someone like that deserves to have their meal paid for. I hope that if one day I’m in an accident I have you there for me.”

(Despite my mother’s protests, the man pays the bill without even glancing at the total. When we go to the front to explain ourselves, the cashier isn’t surprised.)

Cashier: “Oh, that’s Bill. He’s a regular here. I’m not surprised he did that. He’s a real sweetheart. He was actually on his first date with that girl!”

(If you ever read this, Bill, you moved my mom to tears that day. You have forever made me want to be a better person! It’s people like you that re-instill my hope in humanity.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 3

Fast Food, Jerk | Right | February 26, 2013


(I arrive at work an hour and a half early because I forgot what time I start. I decide to sit in the lobby and have lunch before my shift. I notice that the trash can is in dire need of being emptied and that the front counter is busier than usual. I start to tie the bag up, when a customer screeches at me.)

Customer: “What do you think you’re doing?”

Me: “Just changing the garbage, ma’am. It was full to overflowing and it was too busy for someone to leave their post and do it.”

Customer: “You don’t have to do that, young man! You’re not one of these dropouts that lives in their parent’s basements who can’t do anything better with their lives! What are you taking?”

Me: “I’m planning on becoming an licensed practical nurse. But, ma’am, I don’t just go to school. I work to pay my bills. As a matter of fact, I live in a condo my mother owns. She does not live with me, and I pay rent to her. I pay for my electricity, my Internet, and my heating. How do I earn the money for this, you ask?”

(At this point I remove my hat from my bag, put it on and remove my coat, revealing that I am dressed in my work uniform.)

Me: “I work here, taking whatever hours I can get. A student without anything on their resume will take any job they can. ”

(I point to one of my coworkers who is mopping the floors at the back of the store.)

Me: “She’s a neuroscience student. Just like me she has bills to pay. In the future, please remember that people who work in fast food are not always drop outs, but more often than not students trying to fund their education. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take out this trash, unless you would like me to help extract your foot from your mouth first.”

(Flustered and obviously embarrassed, the customer leaves the store in a hurry. My manager, who is also a classmate of mine, speaks with me once I return from the dumpsters.)

Manager: “Technically, you could be fired for badmouthing a customer while on the job like that.”

Me: “Technically, I’m not working right now! I haven’t clocked in, and my shift’s not for another half hour.”

Manager: “Well then, brave citizen, how does free apple pie sound?”

(I accepted, of course. You just don’t say no to free pie!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 2

Restaurant | Right | February 8, 2013


(I am out to breakfast with some friends from work.)

Me: “Excuse me, do you know if the cook uses milk to make the omelets or just eggs?”

Waitress: “Just eggs. Are you allergic to milk?”

Me: “No, but I am lactose intolerant and I forgot to bring my meds.”

(We all order our food. However, after the waitress leaves, I overhear someone from the table next to us asking for a manager.)

Other Customer: *loudly* “I want to complain about that waitress. I heard her interrogating that poor woman about her personal medical issues! I’m a doctor and I know you can’t just ask people about things like that! It’s against the law! She could sue you!”

Me: *to the other customer* “Excuse me, before things get out of hand here, I’m the person she’s talking about. First of all, our waitress asked if I had an allergy to milk. It was a good question considering I made a point of asking if some of your foods have milk in it. If I was really allergic, the kitchen would have to take extra precautions to avoid anaphylaxis. Secondly, there’s no such law that I know of unless you’re talking about the laws in place to protect your private health information from being accessed by other people without your permission. I don’t see how those would apply in this case.”

Other Customer: “What the h*** are you talking about? What are you, some kind of lawyer, smarta**?”

My Friend: “No, ‘doctor,’ she’s some kind of nurse.”

(We all pulled out our hospital IDs. The “doctor” shut up after that. The manager thanked us for clearing things up and left, and our waitress gave us a free round of cheesecake with a free lactose-free muffin for me!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World

Adorable Children, Medical Office, Nurses | Right | October 29, 2012


(My five-year-old son has received a serious injury to his eye. After a pediatrician recommends us to an eye doctor, we are referred to a specialist that works out of a university two hours away from home.)

Nurse: “These are all the contact numbers you should need. I also went online for some directions, and called ahead to let them know it should only be a few hours.”

Son: “I don’t want to.”

Nurse: “What’s the matter?”

Son: *visibly getting upset* “I’m scared.”

Nurse: “But you’ve been so brave this whole time! How about this: if you go see the new doctor, I’ll give you my phone number and you can call me if you get too upset, okay?”

(The nurse writes down her work extension and cell phone number on a piece of paper and adds it to my paperwork, insisting that I feel free to call if I have any problems or questions. My son stays calm all the way to the university and through the appointment with the specialist until we’re told he’s going to need surgery. Crying and upset, he begs me to call the nurse from the clinic.)

Me: *on the phone* “I’m so sorry to bother you, I know you’re still working, but he’s really upset and asked to talk to you.”

(I put the phone on speakerphone so my son, crying on the exam table, can hear.)

Nurse: “Hey, buddy! What’s wrong?”

Son: *crying* “The doctor here wants to give me surgery!”

Nurse: “There’s nothing wrong with that. It’ll make your eye all better. You’ll be able to see again, like we talked about.”

Son: “But I’m scared! It’s going to hurt!”

Nurse: “Of course it’s not going to hurt. That nice doctor wouldn’t hurt you!”

Son: “Have you been given surgeries?”

Nurse: “Yeah, kiddo, a few.”

Son: “And you came back to life?”

Nurse: “Every single time.”

Son: “Promise?”

Nurse: “Swear.”

(My son has calmed down considerably throughout the conversation, and there’s not a dry eye in the room.)

Son: “Okay…”

Nurse: “See? I knew you were brave.”

Son: “Thank you! Love you!”

Nurse: *laughing* “Love you, too.”

(I thanked the nurse a thousand times, and she insisted I call her ASAP to let her know how the surgery went. Later that day, she texted us a picture of herself and her family with a ‘GET WELL SOON’ sign they made for my son!)

[florida80]

Making Some Piercing Assumptions

Health & Body, Medical Office, Parents/Guardians, USA | Healthy | October 23, 2017


(My mother and I are out for lunch on my twentieth birthday. I’ve been wanting to get my navel pierced for a while, so when we pass a tattoo and piercing parlor I go in to check it out. It’s very clean and on the up and up, so Mom offers to pay for the piercing right then and there, and we get it done. Around this same time, I have to go in for an MRI on my right knee to see why it’s hurting so much lately. Mom and I are currently attending the same college, so I’m living at home to save money. Mom drives me to the appointment. She brings her homework and spreads it out all over the table and the surrounding seats, as there are a lot of seats and almost no people.)

Doctor: “[My Last Name]?”

Me: *jumping up* “Right here!”

(Mom begins to pack up her schoolwork.)

Me: *quickly* “Oh, no, that’s fine; you don’t need to come back! Just keep working on your project.”

Mom: *laughs* “I keep forgetting you’re an adult now.”

(I go back with the doctor and, all of a sudden, remember that I’m now pierced.)

Me: “Oh. Oh, jeeze.”

Doctor: “What?”

Me: “Well… see, I know the rules about MRIs and metal, but I just realized that I have a fresh piercing that I can’t take out yet… uh… this is going to be a problem, isn’t it?”

Doctor: “Not if we only scan your knee. May I see it?”

(I lift up my shirt to show him my piercing.)

Doctor: “Are you cleaning it?”

Me: “Twice a day with soap, water, and hydrogen peroxide.”

Doctor: *starts going through his desk* “We get a lot of kids with piercings that they don’t take care of and it can get real ugly, you know.”

Me: “Oh, I know. I got my ears done when I was six. And eight.”

(The doctor gives me a handful of individually wrapped sanitary wipes.)

Doctor: “Here, you can use these to keep the area clean.” *pause* “So, does your mother know about the piercing?”

Me: “What? Oh! Yes; yes, she does. She’s the one who got it for me. I only told her to stay because I didn’t want her to have to pack everything up, that’s all.”

(The doctor looks suspicious.)

Me: “Honest!”

(I change into the hospital gown and the procedure goes well. I get a little more lecturing about how to clean a piercing, and to always make sure to go to a reputable place that uses sterile equipment, before the doctor leads me out. When we’re both in the waiting room, I turn to Mom.)

Me: “Hey, Mom, tell the doctor who bought my navel piercing.”

Mom: “Um… I did?”

(The doctor laughed. Then believed me, and sent me home to await the results.)

[florida80]

Allergic To Your Attitude

England, Medical Office, Teenagers, UK | Healthy | October 23, 2017


(I have an itchy, raised lump on my leg, surrounded by a rash that is not getting better, so I go to see my doctor. I am 22.)

Doctor: “It looks to me like an allergy. I’ll give you these [Allergy Tablets] and if it is not better in a few days, come back.”

Me: “Don’t those tablets contain cetirizine dihydrochloride? I’m allergic to it.”

Doctor: “Don’t be ridiculous! Cetirizine dihydrochloride STOPS allergies. It’s impossible to be allergic to it!”

Me: “I was diagnosed by the allergy clinic at [Hospital]. It should be on my file? I know it sounds counter intuitive but I was tested for every ingredient in the tablets and that is the only one that came back positive. I can’t take it.”

Doctor: “You CANNOT be allergic to it. That isn’t physically possible.”

Me: “I took a hay fever tablet with cetirizine dihydrochloride in it and had a rash on my face and my neck. I was referred to the allergy clinic and they said that’s what caused it.”

Doctor: “I know you’re just trying to be special, but fine, I’ll look.”

(The doctor looks at my file and finds the letter saying I’m allergic to cetirizine dihydrochloride. He then prints and signs the prescription and gives it to me.)

Doctor: *leans right in to my face* “Just take the tablets and stop making such a fuss! You little girls, you stupid BABIES, and your little made up illnesses. Teenagers! Can’t do anything, the idiots. Get a grip and take the tablets. It is impossible to be allergic to the medication that stops allergies. Grow up and stop wasting my time!”

(I took the prescription as proof and reported what happened to the receptionist, who was very angry at the doctor. The doctor was reported to the GMC (General Medical Council). Another doctor treated my itchy leg without giving me cetirizine dihydrochloride. I was eventually diagnosed with a bee-sting allergy.)

[florida80]

The Puppy Is Cat-ching On

home, Illinois, Inspirational, Pets & Animals, USA | Healthy Related | September 18, 2017


One of my friends works for the local vet’s office. It’s a small town with no animal shelter, so if strays are found, the vet will usually take them for a few days until they can find the owner, or place them in a home. My friend knew we’d lost our dog a few months before, and called me up one day to say that they’d just been brought a litter of stray puppies that they needed to find homes for, and if my family wanted one, she’d bring one over that night.

My family talked it over, and even though we weren’t really ready to move on from our other dog’s death, we knew the vet’s office would have trouble finding homes for a full litter of puppies and didn’t have the room to take care of them, and decided it was better for us to take one. So, that night, my friend brought over a tiny golden retriever puppy.

She’d warned us that the puppies they’d found were too young to be away from the mother, which is part of why they were so worried about being able to find good homes for them, but we hadn’t realized just how young they were until she showed up. We fed and cleaned the puppy and made a bed for her where she’d be warm, but the poor thing was clearly stressed out, and started crying as soon as we walked away. We were worried that we’d have to stay up with her all night, when our rather elderly male cats, who’d been very curious about the new arrival, decided to step in.

After sniffing her and touching noses, both of our cats decided that this tiny little thing was probably some kind of strange kitten, and it was their job to take care of her. They curled up on either side of her and started grooming her, and the puppy immediately stopped crying, and snuggled in. My dad had set an alarm to remind him to get up and feed her, but shortly before the alarm went off, one of the cats came and woke him up. For the week or so after that, the cats continued to let us know when the puppy needed to be fed or taken outside, until she was old enough to eat solid food and let us know herself.

As the puppy grew up, the cats continued to take care of her. They taught her how to go up and down stairs, how to find the best spots to nap in the sun, that she should stay away from the road, to come when the humans called her, how to groom herself, and where the treats were kept. The puppy never did get the hang of climbing trees, but she’s surprisingly adept at stalking mice and chipmunks!

The cats were a bonded pair, and they died within a few months of each other when the puppy was three. A few years later, she found our kitten, and happily carried on what her foster parents had started, cuddling and comforting the new arrival and teaching her all the important things. So, our dog thinks she’s a cat. Our cat thinks she’s a dog. Our animals may be a little confused, but they all get along beautifully, and no one seems to mind when the new kitten plays fetch!

[florida80]

That Is ‘Pretty’ Awesome

Adorable Children, Australia, Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Inspirational, Melbourne, Photography Studio, Victoria | Healthy Related Right | August 15, 2017


(I am a photographer running a studio in the inner city. We are well known for our children’s portraits, and we range from high-end portraits for modelling jobs to fun sibling photos and birth announcements. We do a bit of everything; as such, we are extremely busy, and it states on our website that we do not accept walk-ins. We are usually booked up six months in advance. One day, ten minutes before closing, a mum walks in with a young girl around six or seven behind her. I internally groan.)

Mother: “Hello. I know you’re closing soon, but I have a special favour to ask.”

(At this point the little girl peeks around her mother’s legs and I’m lost for words. Under her thick winter coat and hat, she is skeletally thin with huge dark circles under her eyes. From what I can tell, she has no hair, and a tube taped to her cheek that feeds into her nose. It is immediately clear this kid is very, very sick.)

Mother: *near tears* “My daughter saw one of your photos taped to the wall at the hospital. She REALLY loves unicorns and the photo had a girl photo-shopped onto a horse. I know you’re booked up, and it’s months before the next appointment, but…”

(At this point she actually starts crying. I realise that our next available appointment is probably way too far away for this particular kid. The little girl squeezes her mother’s hand. I am a very big dude, covered in tattoos and a beard, but I’m not ashamed to say I needed a minute before I spoke.)

Me: “Aww, that’s just for regular customers! I’ve been waiting all day to take a photo of someone as beautiful as you! What’s your name, sweetheart?”

(I lock the front door and spend the next three hours taking photos of this kid in every princess costume I have in my closet. She is the sweetest, most well-behaved kid I have ever worked with. Once we’re done she curls up on the couch in my office and falls asleep while I load up the photos for her mum to see and choose the ones she likes best, and ask her what kind of retouching she’d like done. She’s adamant that I leave her daughter as is — apparently the little girl has been worried for the past month that she is no longer “pretty.”)

Me: “All right, so we’ve settled on these. I can have them edited and all finished in two days. If you give me your email I can send you the link to the website and the password to download them when they’re ready.”

(The mother thanks me over and over and comes up front, carrying her sleeping daughter, and holds out her credit card.)

Me: “Nope. No way.”

Mother: “Please, I insist. You stayed open so late and your shoots are listed for [amount] online. Please at least charge me that.

Me: “Absolutely not. I am not taking money for this. No way in h***.”

(A few days later I send the link through and hear nothing. I see she’s downloaded the photos and I think nothing of it, hoping my sweet little friend loved her photos. Almost six months later I’m once again closing up when a very familiar face pops up at my window, grinning and waving frantically.)

Me: *throwing open the door* “Hey, you!”

Little Girl: “Hi! I’m better! Look, I’m better!”

(Sure enough, she’d put on some weight, was flushed and pink, and had a fine fuzz of hair over her head. Her mother was a few steps behind her, grinning. She once again tried to force an envelope full of money into my hand, and again I refused. She got frustrated and eventually in her exasperation said, “at least let us take you to dinner!” which I happily accepted. Seven years later that photo of a sick little girl astride a giant pink unicorn is in a frame in my lounge room. My now-step-daughter groans every time I point it out to the friends she brings home!)

[florida80]

Getting Hysterectical

Bad Behavior, Canada, Employees, Health & Body, Hospital | Healthy | June 25, 2017


(I got a hysterectomy because I hate my period and never want to have children. When I wake up from the anaesthetic, there’s a nurse standing over my bed.)

Nurse: “Don’t you ever want kids?”

(That was literally the first thing she said. I thought of so many responses later, but at the time I was too stunned and groggy to say anything. Also: period-free life is awesome. 10/10 highly recommend.)

[florida80]

The Importance Of Life-Saving Sandwiches

Family & Kids, Health & Body, Inspirational | Healthy Working | April 27, 2017


I work at a large mine in an isolated area. As a member of our Technical Rescue Team, I have been called many times to assist the local sheriff’s Search and Rescue.

One day in late May, when wildfires less than 20 miles away are suffusing the air with smoke, we receive a page to proceed to a canyon near the state line. This canyon has a highway carved into a steep rock wall, with the debris pushed down into the chasm. In the past, our team had been called to the area to remove the remains of drivers who crashed through the guardrails, so we are ready for the worst.

When we arrive, the SO officers tell us a father and his three sons have “hiked” to the bottom of the canyon and are stranded. They actually scrambled down approximately 600 feet of broken rock, and then found that climbing back up was impossible. It is after 5:00 pm when we arrive.

By the time we manage to get rescuers to the bottom and formulate an extraction plan, darkness has set in. I am the first down, making contact and bringing water and flashlights. Other team members follow close behind, and we move the group (father with sons 6, 7, and 9 years old) to the raise point. One of the team members brought a backpack with sandwiches, granola bars, and water. The boys agree to wait for the sandwiches until we reach the top and gobble up the granola bars (I’ll admit, the one I had was the best ever).

The trip back up the fractured rock pile takes nearly two hours, most of the time at least partially suspended on the main-line rope. There are several small incidents (lost cell phones and tennis shoes, rolling rocks, etc.) on the way up, but topping out and disconnecting was one of the best feelings I’ve ever had. The family is rushed to a waiting ambulance for evaluation, and my team leader and incident commander examine the other rescuers and me carefully before allowing us to stow our gear and get ready to leave.

I remembered that I had the sunglasses of one of the children in my pack, so I went to the back of the ambulance and opened the door to return them. That’s when the youngest asked, in one of the smallest, most plaintive voices I’ve ever heard, “But what about our sandwiches?”

When we drove away into the dawn, the father and three boys were standing in front of the ambulance eating sandwiches

[florida80]

The Store Employs Manual Labor

Health & Body, Inspirational | Healthy | April 26, 2017


(I’m standing in line with a few items to purchase from a well-known clothing store. The store has its music quite loud, so I can’t really hear anything said between the employees at the front of the line. One dashes past me, almost knocking over a rack of clothes, and grabs the manager by the arm. She says something, the manager turns pale, and tells the other girl on the register something, who looks confused and starts checking people out at lightning speed. All the other employees in the store run full pelt to the changing rooms. I manage to catch some of what the manager says into her phone as she runs past, but all I hear is “I need an ambulance!” I step out of line and drop my clothes to follow her. As I reach the changing rooms an employee stops me from entering.)

Employee: “I’m sorry, miss, but the changing rooms are closed right now. I’ll be able to help you soon.”

Me: “What’s going on? I’m—”

(Mid-sentence I am cut off by a shriek I know VERY well. I unzip my jacket, showing my hospital ID still clipped to my shirt pocket. The employee shoves me through the curtain.)

Manager: “[Employee]! I told you not to let anyone back here!”

Me: “Trust me; you NEED me! I’m a midwife!”

(And that was the day I delivered a healthy baby girl in the changing room at a clothing store!)

[florida80]

The Patient Isn’t The Only One With Patience

Awesome, Employees, Health & Body, Inspirational | Healthy Working | March 25, 2017


The hospital I work for lets patients leave comments about something good that happened to them during their stay. Once a month, the best stories are picked and shared with everyone. This story really stuck with me.

A patient who was doing an extended stay at the hospital came running out of her room in tears, screaming for help. [Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] happened to be nearby and ran to the patient’s side checking for injuries; she seems to be okay, but she is begging the nurse for help. The patient explains that she’s just gotten off the phone with her sister and it is her sister that needs help. Her sister had been having a rough go at life recently and could no longer take it; she had called to say goodbye. [Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] immediately calls for another nurse for help as she helps the patient back her her room. She briefly explains the situation to the second nurse who pulls out his phone and dials 911 as the patient attempt to get her sister back on the line.

For the next 20-30 minutes the two nurses never leave the patient’s side. [Nurse #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) ] is keeping a close look at the patient’s health while giving her suggestions on things to say to keep her sister on the line, as it would mean more coming from a loved one rather than a stranger. Meanwhile, [Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ] is on the phone covertly getting the sister’s information from the patient and passing it along to the dispatcher.

Unfortunately, it seems that the sister catches on and swallows a handful of pills before hanging up the phone… mere minutes before the paramedics pull into her drive. Since [Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ] is still on the phone with dispatch, he is able to convey to them exactly what had happened inside the house — they even know what kind of pills she’d taken! The paramedics rush the sister to the emergency room where they are able to save her life. The paramedics and dispatch are in constant contact with [Nurse #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) ], relaying information through him to our patient, up until the point when the sister is admitted.

The nurses went above and beyond for the patient. They could have simply called 911 and reported the situation, but they stayed by the patient’s side and treated her sister, who lives in a completely different city. A huge thank you also has to go out to the paramedics and 911 dispatcher who kept the patient informed through the entire ordeal.

I am happy to report that at the time of me writing this, both sisters are doing well.

[florida80]

That’s A-Meow-****!

Awesome, Inspirational, Money, Pets & Animals | Healthy | February 6, 2017


(I was in the car driving when this came on the radio. A cat had been shot repeatedly in the head by someone with an airsoft gun and had been brought into a veterinary clinic. The cat had no owner that the clinic knew of, and they were using a very popular radio station to advertise the cat’s plight and raise money to try and save it. They needed a grand total of £4,000 as the clinic has decided to foot half the bill. People call up to donate, or go into the clinic, and it’s very quick that they managed to get £500 when this call comes through.)

Host: “You’re through to [Radio Channel]; can I take your name?”

Caller: “I don’t want to give it. I want to donate, though.”

Host: “Okay, that’s great! How much do you want to donate?”

Caller: “I want to pay £7,500.”

(The host and vet representative are clearly shocked, and explain how much they’re looking for because of the split.)

Caller: “I understand that, but I don’t want the clinic to do that. It’s a nice thing to do, but they have other animals to save and I don’t want them to suffer with this. I don’t have children. I lost my husband. I don’t have to worry about overheads but I have a LOT of money. I want to pay for the entirety of the cat’s surgery. And, if no-one claims that poor cat, I’d like to give that cat a home.”

(It moved the host, the representative, me, and I’m sure a lot more listeners to tears. We later found out that the lady who donated did take the cat, and she calls up now and then to keep them posted on how he’s doing.)

[florida80]

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Making Sure The Survivors Are Surviving

Hall of Fame, Health & Body, Inspirational, Language & Words, Popular | Healthy Right | May 19, 2016


(My family is 100% German, and came to the US around 1900. Shortly after WW II ended, my grandma, who was working on getting her nursing certification, decided to volunteer at an aid center for recently arrived Holocaust survivors. My grandma was born in Chicago, and English was and is her first language, but she spoke German because her parents and grandparents spoke it, and had a slight accent. She’d been bullied about it all through the war, and was worried it’d be the same at the center, but decided to volunteer anyway. Sure enough, some of the other nurses started making snide comments, until one of the patients, a woman in a wheelchair, beckoned her over.)

Patient: *in halting English* “You… German?”

Grandma: “No.”

Patient: *disappointed* “You no speak German?”

Grandma: *in German* “Ja. I speak German. My parents are from Germany.”

Patient: *in German* “Oh, thank the Lord! English is such a hard language, and everyone here is so brusque, and there are no trees anywhere! I miss the mountains! What part of Germany are your parents from? Do they miss it? Have you ever been?”

(As soon as they found out my grandma spoke German, all of the other survivors came right over and started chatting away, completely dumbfounding the rest of the nurses! To my grandma’s relief, none of them held it against her that her family was German; most of them just wanted to talk about their homes and families, and were relieved to find someone who spoke their language. It wasn’t long before some of the other nurses and the aid center director asked her for help learning German themselves!)

[florida80]

Kindness Has Real Staying Power

Health & Body, Inspirational, Popular | Healthy | May 17, 2016


(After avoiding any kind of surgery for the 35 years of my life I end up in the ER on Monday with appendicitis. I am very, very scared because of the aforementioned lack of surgeries. One of my roommates comes with me and intends to stay with me all night.)

Nurse: “We like people to go home and not stay here all night. It’s not comfortable.”

Roommate: “That’s okay. I want to stay.”

Nurse: “Well, in a shared room you have to get the permission of the person in the other room.”

Roommate: “Well, then, ask them. I want to stay.”

Other Person: “Let her stay! If I had someone here with me I’d want them to stay.”

(I was so out of it, and so scared, but the other person, also there with appendicitis, was so kind to let my roommate stay with me and it helped a lot. My roommate literally held my hand all night so every time I woke up I could feel it. If she hadn’t been there I think I’d have been inconsolable. I’m healing fine, and the other person in my room was able to go home without needing surgery at all!)

[florida80]

Kindness Has Real Staying Power

Health & Body, Inspirational, Popular | Healthy | May 17, 2016


(After avoiding any kind of surgery for the 35 years of my life I end up in the ER on Monday with appendicitis. I am very, very scared because of the aforementioned lack of surgeries. One of my roommates comes with me and intends to stay with me all night.)

Nurse: “We like people to go home and not stay here all night. It’s not comfortable.”

Roommate: “That’s okay. I want to stay.”

Nurse: “Well, in a shared room you have to get the permission of the person in the other room.”

Roommate: “Well, then, ask them. I want to stay.”

Other Person: “Let her stay! If I had someone here with me I’d want them to stay.”

(I was so out of it, and so scared, but the other person, also there with appendicitis, was so kind to let my roommate stay with me and it helped a lot. My roommate literally held my hand all night so every time I woke up I could feel it. If she hadn’t been there I think I’d have been inconsolable. I’m healing fine, and the other person in my room was able to go home without needing surgery at all!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 9

Awesome, Health & Body, Inspirational, Kind Strangers, Popular | Healthy | May 17, 2016


(My family is visiting my grandma, and we like renting bicycles to ride around the gated community where she lives. My mom and two younger siblings are just on our way back to the house. It’s a very hot day and I’m wearing a dark shirt.)

Me: “Hold up a minute. I feel woozy.”

(I pull onto the grass and sit down, panting, as my vision swirls with purple-green clouds. Usually they clear in a few moments, but they’re not going away. I can’t get back on the bike until I can see, so Mom is about to send my brother on ahead to bring Dad back with the car, when a car pulls up next to us.)

Little Old Lady: “Do you need help?”

(I’m a little fuzzy on the details after that point, but it turned out that she was a retired nurse! She offered to drive me back to Grandma’s house. I was doing a little better in the air-conditioned car, but I was still woozy and she talked to me to keep me awake. When we got to the house, I had to lean on her shoulder to get inside; my dad told me later that he thought I was helping her at first! She helped me into a reclining chair and got a cool, damp washcloth to put on my forehead before she left, with instructions to drink lots of water and not move for a while. She left before I could thank her, but I sent a thank-you note when I was better. Even after they retire, nurses are awesome people!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 8

Medical Office | Working | March 4, 2016


(During first full week of Advanced Placement and IB tests of my junior year in high school I find myself struck with a particularly nasty illness called norovirus, which causes nearly non-stop vomiting and diarrhea. I am home alone, as my father is out the whole week for business, and I am taking the bus to and from school for exams. Since I knew I cannot miss any of these tests on such short notice, I manage to tough it out for four days, but at that point I have not been able to eat or drink anything that remains in my stomach for more than five minutes. Severely dehydrated and weak, I finally decide to go to a close-by clinic for IV fluids after school. Since they need a doctor on-site to legally be able to give fluids, I call ahead.)

Nurse: “Hello, [Clinic]. This is [Nurse]. How may I help you?”

Me: *very quietly as my throat has started to develop acid sores* “Hi… Do you have the… Do you do IV fluids?”

Nurse: “What’s that, sweetie? I didn’t quite catch that.”

Me: “I need IV fluids… I really need them.”

Nurse: “Unfortunately we don’t have a doctor with us right now, hun.” *I start crying, since at this point I’m worried I will not be able to get out of bed tomorrow for my next exam* “Sweetie, what’s the matter? Are you hurt?”

Me: “No… I think I got norovirus from that restaurant that was shut down last week and I’m home alone and I have my AP tests that I can’t miss and I haven’t been able to eat or drink anything for days and I’m getting too weak to do anything! I can’t go to the ER because my dad didn’t leave me enough money to cover anything and I really need to go to my exam tomorrow!”

Nurse: “All right, sweetie, give me one second.” *the line is silent for about five minutes* “Okay, hun, here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to go out to you and pick you up, then we’re going to go to the [Clinic] downtown and get you your fluids. After that I’ll take you home and you give me your exam schedule. Is tomorrow your last day for exams until next week?”

Me: *shocked at her kindness* “Yes, ma’am.”

Nurse: “All righty. Then I’ll take you to your exam tomorrow morning and then we do need to check you into the hospital, all right, sweetie? Give me your address and I’ll be there in a few minutes. Call your dad and tell him what is going on, okay?”

(This nurse had negotiated with her supervisor to get the next two days off work so she could make sure I was taken care of and safe. After my exam the next day she picked me up and took me to the hospital, used a few personal favors to get me in quickly and hold off on payment, and stayed with me until my father could get there. We have since become good friends, and I am currently working on my own MD while volunteering at her clinic. This woman is why nurses really should rule the world!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 7

Hospital | Working | October 30, 2015


(I am pregnant and suffering from toxaemia, which is a form of blood poisoning. My blood pressure is extremely high and I have been admitted to hospital. I have been there for two weeks when my blood pressure goes even higher.)

Matron: “You have been scheduled for an emergency induction tomorrow morning; we can’t leave you like this for any longer.”

(Very early the next morning, she comes in and starts the preparation for the induction when a doctor comes in.)

Doctor: “[Matron], I need you to stop what you are doing. I need to speak to the patient. Please leave us alone.”

Matron: “Yes, doctor.” *leaves*

Doctor: *to me* “We are postponing your induction.”

Me: “But I’ve been told I have to have it.”

Doctor: “We’ve decided not to do it right now. It doesn’t really matter, seeing as this is elective.” *meaning I chose to have it done*

(He says nothing to reassure me and leaves. Later one of the nurses comes by.)

Nurse: “[My Name], what are you still doing here? I was sure you would have had your baby by now.”

Me: “Dr [Doctor] told me that it wasn’t being done, and told me it was elective.”

Nurse: “He said what? Did you elect to get pre-eclampsia? I’ll go and see what’s going on.”

(A few minutes later she is back.)

Nurse: “I found out why they postponed you. We only have four birthing rooms and there are a dozen screaming women down there waiting to get into them. You were considered stable enough to wait one more day”.

Me: “I would have understood if he said that.”

Nurse: “Yeah, doctors don’t think.”

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 6

Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Medical Office, Nurses | Working | December 9, 2013


(I’ve been sick this past week and I go to the clinic at nine am. They tell me they will call in the prescription at ten am. At two pm, I go to check the prescription.)

Pharmacist: “I have no prescription here under your name.”

Me: “The clinic said it would be ready by ten am. Let me call them.”

(I call the clinic.)

Me: “Hello. I have a prescription that hasn’t been put through yet. I need to make sure I am at the right pharmacy.”

(I am promptly transferred without a word to the women’s clinic line, which is the incorrect department. I am instructed to leave a message, as the nurses are out to lunch.)

Me: “Um, hi. I am [My Name]. I was just wondering where my prescription was sent. It’s not at the pharmacy and—” *I cough and my head immediately begins to ache terribly. I sniffle and tear up* “—if you could please help me that’d be nice.”

(I hang up and go home. At three pm I go to the clinic to verify the location of the pharmacy. They tell me the order has been sent, and to wait a couple hours. I go home yet again. At five pm I get a call from the women’s clinic number at which I left the message.)

Nurse: “Hello, is this [My Name]? You left a message a couple hours ago.”

Me: “Yes. I’m sorry, I was trying to find out where my prescription was. I already checked back with the clinic and they told me where the prescription would be.”

Nurse: “Everything’s all right, though? This is the wrong department for your call, but since you’ve had the prescription filled…”

Me: “Well… no… I called the pharmacy and the prescription still hasn’t been ordered yet.”

Nurse: “Oh. Let me get on that. I’ll make sure they get it filled out.”

Me: “Okay.”

Nurse: “I will call you back in a minute, sweetie.”

(The nurse hangs up and calls back a few minutes later.)

Nurse: “Okay, I’ve gotten them to fill out your prescription and the pharmacy should have it soon. You are taking [Medicine], which is two pills twice a day. No matter how bad it is, take all of them. You can take decongestants and ibuprofen to deal with the congestion and pain. And, honey, popsicles are your best friends. Drink lots of fluids and warm tea, and get plenty of rest.”

(At this point, the nurse’s concern has caused me to tear up.)

Me: “Thank you so much! I’ve been dealing with this for a week.”

Nurse: “You just sound so sick, sweetie. I called the pharmacy and told them to work extra quick on your order. The pharmacist’s name is [Name]. She’ll have your prescription ready as soon as she can.”

Me: “Thank you.”

Nurse: “You feel better, honey.”

(To that nurse: You had me sobbing. You cared so much and it wasn’t even your department. You helped me and told me more about my medicine than the doctor in the CORRECT department did. I’m so grateful there are people as nice as you working in the women’s clinic!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 5

Bullies, Hospital, Nurses, Parents/Guardians, Wild & Unruly | Right | August 13, 2013


(I’m 18, and have been hospitalized for a severe case of mono. As a result of the illness, my throat is badly swollen and I can hardly speak. I’m on lots of painkillers. I’m sharing a room with a boy who swallowed a rock. The boy has been screaming since his mother left and his father can’t quiet him down.)

Nurse: “Okay, [My Name], I’m just going to check your vitals.”

Me: *whispering* “How much longer until I can have more pain medication?”

Nurse: “Not for a while, sweetie.”

(The nurse leaves. The boy’s father has been watching us the whole time.)

Boy’s Father: “Listen, you little b****! Don’t you f****** gossip about me to the f****** nurses! You keep your f****** mouth shut, or I’ll shut it for you!”

(I’m stunned, as I haven’t said a word to or about him. As I can’t move and can barely speak, I’m in tears and terrified. Not long after, my mom comes in to visit.)

Mom: “Hey, [My Name]. How are you doing?”

Me: *crying and whispering* “Mom, the dad of that boy screamed at me. He said to shut up, or he’d shut me up.”

(My mom is silent, but clearly fuming. She leaves for a moment.)

Boy’s Father: “WHAT DID I SAY?!”

(Just then, my mom comes back with security in tow.)

Mom: “Escort him from hospital grounds NOW.”

Boy’s Father: “B****! You can’t tell me what to do! You aren’t the boss here! I’m twenty-f******-five!”

Mom: “Actually, I AM the boss here! It’s my day off, but I’m head nurse on this floor, and if you EVER speak to my daughter ever again, I will have you arrested so fast that you won’t ever hear the sirens! And by the way, I’m forty-freaking-eight and I have the good sense not to let my kids eat rocks!”

(The man was removed from hospital grounds and was banned from re-entering for 48 hours unless it was an emergency. I have the best mom in the world.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 4

Restaurant | Right | June 14, 2013


(My mother takes my younger brother and me out to a restaurant for dinner. As we are eating we witness a car crash in the road. My mother, being an LPN (licensed practical nurse), leaves her meal to rush across the street to offer help. We are seated by an elderly couple right next to a window.)

Elderly Man: “Did your mom just go out there to help them?”

Me: “Oh, well, she’s a nurse. Pretty much anytime an accident occurs and she’s there, she tries to help.”

Restaurant Proprietor: “That’s your mother out there?”

Little Brother: “Yeah. Our mom’s a nurse, so she went to help out.”

Restaurant Proprietor: “Wow! How cool!”

(My mother spends the next 30 minutes out in the middle of traffic, helping both drivers with their injuries, and waiting until EMTs arrive. She comes back in, and we resume our meal like nothing has happened.)

Elderly Woman: “Are they okay?”

Mom: “Yeah, but the poor girl — her parents are out of town. She has to wait in the hospital for them to come and see her. She pulled out, and that guy pulled out in front of her and rammed her car.”

Elderly Woman: “Well, at least they’re okay.”

(Another 20 minutes pass while my mother finishes her meal and the check is brought out to us. As the proprietor from earlier leaves the check, the couple next to us get up to leave.)

Elderly Man: “Let me tell you something…”

(He quickly snatches the check off of our table.)

Elderly Man: “If I were in an accident like that and needed help, I would want you to come and help me. Anyone who selflessly dodges traffic to help someone like that deserves to have their meal paid for. I hope that if one day I’m in an accident I have you there for me.”

(Despite my mother’s protests, the man pays the bill without even glancing at the total. When we go to the front to explain ourselves, the cashier isn’t surprised.)

Cashier: “Oh, that’s Bill. He’s a regular here. I’m not surprised he did that. He’s a real sweetheart. He was actually on his first date with that girl!”

(If you ever read this, Bill, you moved my mom to tears that day. You have forever made me want to be a better person! It’s people like you that re-instill my hope in humanity.)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 3

Fast Food, Jerk | Right | February 26, 2013


(I arrive at work an hour and a half early because I forgot what time I start. I decide to sit in the lobby and have lunch before my shift. I notice that the trash can is in dire need of being emptied and that the front counter is busier than usual. I start to tie the bag up, when a customer screeches at me.)

Customer: “What do you think you’re doing?”

Me: “Just changing the garbage, ma’am. It was full to overflowing and it was too busy for someone to leave their post and do it.”

Customer: “You don’t have to do that, young man! You’re not one of these dropouts that lives in their parent’s basements who can’t do anything better with their lives! What are you taking?”

Me: “I’m planning on becoming an licensed practical nurse. But, ma’am, I don’t just go to school. I work to pay my bills. As a matter of fact, I live in a condo my mother owns. She does not live with me, and I pay rent to her. I pay for my electricity, my Internet, and my heating. How do I earn the money for this, you ask?”

(At this point I remove my hat from my bag, put it on and remove my coat, revealing that I am dressed in my work uniform.)

Me: “I work here, taking whatever hours I can get. A student without anything on their resume will take any job they can. ”

(I point to one of my coworkers who is mopping the floors at the back of the store.)

Me: “She’s a neuroscience student. Just like me she has bills to pay. In the future, please remember that people who work in fast food are not always drop outs, but more often than not students trying to fund their education. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take out this trash, unless you would like me to help extract your foot from your mouth first.”

(Flustered and obviously embarrassed, the customer leaves the store in a hurry. My manager, who is also a classmate of mine, speaks with me once I return from the dumpsters.)

Manager: “Technically, you could be fired for badmouthing a customer while on the job like that.”

Me: “Technically, I’m not working right now! I haven’t clocked in, and my shift’s not for another half hour.”

Manager: “Well then, brave citizen, how does free apple pie sound?”

(I accepted, of course. You just don’t say no to free pie!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World, Part 2

Restaurant | Right | February 8, 2013


(I am out to breakfast with some friends from work.)

Me: “Excuse me, do you know if the cook uses milk to make the omelets or just eggs?”

Waitress: “Just eggs. Are you allergic to milk?”

Me: “No, but I am lactose intolerant and I forgot to bring my meds.”

(We all order our food. However, after the waitress leaves, I overhear someone from the table next to us asking for a manager.)

Other Customer: *loudly* “I want to complain about that waitress. I heard her interrogating that poor woman about her personal medical issues! I’m a doctor and I know you can’t just ask people about things like that! It’s against the law! She could sue you!”

Me: *to the other customer* “Excuse me, before things get out of hand here, I’m the person she’s talking about. First of all, our waitress asked if I had an allergy to milk. It was a good question considering I made a point of asking if some of your foods have milk in it. If I was really allergic, the kitchen would have to take extra precautions to avoid anaphylaxis. Secondly, there’s no such law that I know of unless you’re talking about the laws in place to protect your private health information from being accessed by other people without your permission. I don’t see how those would apply in this case.”

Other Customer: “What the h*** are you talking about? What are you, some kind of lawyer, smarta**?”

My Friend: “No, ‘doctor,’ she’s some kind of nurse.”

(We all pulled out our hospital IDs. The “doctor” shut up after that. The manager thanked us for clearing things up and left, and our waitress gave us a free round of cheesecake with a free lactose-free muffin for me!)

[florida80]

Why Nurses Should Rule The World

Adorable Children, Medical Office, Nurses | Right | October 29, 2012


(My five-year-old son has received a serious injury to his eye. After a pediatrician recommends us to an eye doctor, we are referred to a specialist that works out of a university two hours away from home.)

Nurse: “These are all the contact numbers you should need. I also went online for some directions, and called ahead to let them know it should only be a few hours.”

Son: “I don’t want to.”

Nurse: “What’s the matter?”

Son: *visibly getting upset* “I’m scared.”

Nurse: “But you’ve been so brave this whole time! How about this: if you go see the new doctor, I’ll give you my phone number and you can call me if you get too upset, okay?”

(The nurse writes down her work extension and cell phone number on a piece of paper and adds it to my paperwork, insisting that I feel free to call if I have any problems or questions. My son stays calm all the way to the university and through the appointment with the specialist until we’re told he’s going to need surgery. Crying and upset, he begs me to call the nurse from the clinic.)

Me: *on the phone* “I’m so sorry to bother you, I know you’re still working, but he’s really upset and asked to talk to you.”

(I put the phone on speakerphone so my son, crying on the exam table, can hear.)

Nurse: “Hey, buddy! What’s wrong?”

Son: *crying* “The doctor here wants to give me surgery!”

Nurse: “There’s nothing wrong with that. It’ll make your eye all better. You’ll be able to see again, like we talked about.”

Son: “But I’m scared! It’s going to hurt!”

Nurse: “Of course it’s not going to hurt. That nice doctor wouldn’t hurt you!”

Son: “Have you been given surgeries?”

Nurse: “Yeah, kiddo, a few.”

Son: “And you came back to life?”

Nurse: “Every single time.”

Son: “Promise?”

Nurse: “Swear.”

(My son has calmed down considerably throughout the conversation, and there’s not a dry eye in the room.)

Son: “Okay…”

Nurse: “See? I knew you were brave.”

Son: “Thank you! Love you!”

Nurse: *laughing* “Love you, too.”

(I thanked the nurse a thousand times, and she insisted I call her ASAP to let her know how the surgery went. Later that day, she texted us a picture of herself and her family with a ‘GET WELL SOON’ sign they made for my son

[florida80]

An Anti-Depressing Turn Of Events

Awesome, Employees, Health & Body, Inspirational, Popular | Healthy Right | April 22, 2016


(This happened during what was one of the worst times in my life. I’ve just transferred to a new college and it is a rough transition. I am lonely, self-conscious, have about a million doubts about myself and my life. My anxiety has gotten so bad that I am literally sobbing in the doctor’s office just by attempting to discuss it with him. This man has been my whole family’s doctor for most of my life.)

Doctor: “I know you’re reluctant to try medication, a lot of people are, but sometimes it’s just brain chemistry. And seeing you here like this, hearing that you’ve already tried therapy, I just want to help you find something that will help you.”

Me: “I just don’t want that to mean that there’s something wrong with me.”

Doctor: “That’s not what this means. It means that you’re doing what you need to do in order to live a happy, healthy life. And if it doesn’t work for you, you can stop whenever you want. Look, there’s this new anti-depressant that’s still in trial stages but it’s doing really well and has minimal side effects. How about I give you some of the free samples and you just try it out?”

(I eventually, reluctantly, agreed to this. As I left, I was handed a cardboard box, definitely bigger than I’d anticipated for just a few free samples. It turned out that my doctor had given me ten bottles of the stuff, all free samples, so that I would have enough that I could take back to college with me if I decided to use it, plus some free samples of an allergy spray that he knew I sometimes had trouble affording, and a prescription for another anti-depressant just in case this one didn’t work for me. This doctor honestly saved me. I took those anti-depressants for just about a year and they worked. I don’t take them anymore; I’ve changed enough in mind and body and lifestyle that I don’t need them now. But I never would have gotten to this point without them. My doctor took the time and effort to think of me as a person as well as a patient and went the extra mile to make sure I’d be ok. THANK YOU. This, to me, is what all doctors should strive to be.)

[florida80]

A Friendly Bill Of Health

Hall of Fame, Inspirational, Kind Strangers, Money, Pets & Animals, Popular | Healthy | April 5, 2016


(When I was 19 I had just moved into my first apartment. I got a kitten from a friend’s cat that had kittens. I suffered from severe (suicidal) depression at the time, barely leaving the house or doing anything. Once I had a kitten to care for, I had a lot more motivation to care for myself. It was a huge step in getting myself into therapy and recovering. No matter how bad things got, I always had my baby kitty who always loved me. She lives with me for 18 years in reasonably good health but eventually, her kidneys give out and it is her time. Unfortunately, I have just lost my job and we are pretty broke. As we are long time, reliable clients of the vet, they agree to let us pay in installments. I sell some crafts I make online so I make social media posts promoting my craft site to help cover the costs of my baby kitty’s euthanasia and cremation. About a week later of stressful, sad job-hunting and desperate crafting, I get a phone call from the vet:)

Vet: ” I have some news for you”

Me: *confused* “Okay…”

Vet: “Someone called in and anonymously paid your bill.”

Me: “What…?”

Vet: “They made us swear to keep it anonymous, but your entire vet bill has been cleared up. You don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

Me: *sobbing uncontrollably*

(I don’t think I will ever be able to thank that anonymous donor enough. My kitty was a literal lifesaver. Losing her (even after having her for 18 years) was crushing to me. I worried the stress was going to push me back into the depression again, but this act of kindness brought me back. Thank you.)

[florida80]

In(tentional) Sickness And In Health

British Columbia, Canada, Emergency Services, Funny, Great Stuff, Spouses & Partners, Victoria | Healthy Right | March 14, 2010


(We respond to an unconscious diabetic. While my partner is treating the patient, I am asking the wife some questions.)

Me: “So is your husband on any medications?”

(She lists the medications her husband is on, including insulin.)

Me: “And has he been compliant with those medications lately?”

Wife: “Nope.”

Me: “Do you know why not?”

Wife: “Well we had a big fight last week, so I hid all his meds. He hasn’t found them yet.”

[florida80]

Totally Plastered

Extra Stupid, Great Stuff, Health & Body, Hospital, Ignoring & Inattentive | Healthy Right | October 30, 2009


Me: “All right, your cast is on nice and secure. It should heal within four to six weeks.”

Patient: “Really? Only four to six minutes?”

Me: “No, four to six weeks.”

Patient: “Okay, four to six minutes.”

Me: “Sir, it’s impossible for it to heal within four to six minutes. It takes about four to six weeks.”

Patient: “Oh, all right.”

(I turn around to fill out his form. When I turn back around, he has taken off his cast.)

Me: “Sir, why did you take off your cast?!”

Patient: “Well, you said it heals within four to six minutes, but you said it was too short. I waited seven minutes… but it still hurts.”

Me: “Sir, your arm is still broken. Four to six weeks is around a month and a half.”

Patient: “Well, why didn’t you tell me that in the first place?! A month and a half is five weeks! Why did you say four to six minutes?”

Me: “I never said…” *I pause and compose myself* “…Okay, nevermind. Let’s put on a new cast.”

Patient: “Oooh! Can I have a pink one

[florida80]

Loosely Based On A True Story

Dentist, Health & Body | Healthy Right | October 28, 2009


Patient: “I think there’s something wrong with my tooth.”

Me: “Can you describe the problem?”

Patient: “Well, I think it’s loose.”

(The patient suddenly spits his tooth onto the counter in front of me.)

Me: “Yes… Yes, I think you’re right.”

[florida80]

They Call Me Doctor DIY

Call Center, Dentist, Doctor/Physician, Great Stuff | Healthy Right | October 22, 2009


(We sell dental surgical products and sometimes have to give instructions on their usage. A doctor calls in from the operating room and has me on speakerphone while they’re operating on a patient, who may or may not be under anesthesia.)

Doctor: “The screw is not going in. Which way do I turn it?”

Me: “Clockwise.”

Doctor: “Clockwise from above or below?”

Me: “If you are looking at the head of the screw, then clockwise… to the right.”

Doctor: “What do you mean to the right? Move the wrench to the right?”

Me: “As the screw turns, and you are looking at the head, the top part will go to the right.”

Doctor: “Okay, I think I got it.”

Me: “Good. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.”

Doctor: “What was that?”

Me: “Uh, righty tighty, lefty loosey? That’s one way to remember. You go to the right to tighten, and the left to loosen.”

Doctor: “Oh, I see. Righty tighty, lefty loosey!” *noise of wrench turning* “Righty tighty, lefty loosey. It’s working!”

Me: “Great. All finished?”

(The doctor suddenly speaks up much louder than before. It’s clear they’re not talking to me.)

Doctor: “You’re all done then!”

Patient: *in the distance* “Uh, thank you, doctor

[florida80]

If The Zits Don’t Kill You, The Angst Will

Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Medical Office, Teenagers | Healthy Right | October 6, 2009


Me: Hello this is [Doctor’s Office]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Help! I’ve sprouted a nipple on my forehead!”

(From the caller’s voice, I could tell that it was a female teenager.)

Me: “Excuse me? If this is a prank, I can report you–”

Caller: “No, this is not a prank! This morning I got up, and there was this huge, red lump on my forehead… and now I’ve poked it and this milk is coming out!”

Me: “Hon, that’s a pimple, not a nipple.”

Caller: “Oh…” *gasps* “Is it deadly?”

[florida80]

Getting On Your Nerves

Dentist, Health & Body | Healthy Right | September 22, 2009


(I am a dentist about to give a patient a shot of local anesthetic).

Patient: “I hate needles. Will this hurt?”

Me: “Just concentrate on taking nice, deep breaths. It’ll be over before you know it.”

Patient: “Could you please tell me when you’re ready to give the shot? I need to know!”

Me: “Sure. I’ll give it on the count of three. Ready? One, two–”

Patient: *screams* “You’re killing me! It hurts so much!”

Me: “I haven’t actually given you the shot yet.”

Patient: “Oh. Well, um, I was just practicing for when you did.”

[florida80]

We Want Your Braaaiiins

Health & Body, Hospital, Math & Science | Healthy Right | September 16, 2009


(A subject is speaking with me about a sleep-study we were doing.)

Subject: “So, I’ll just have to go to sleep for the study, right?”

Me:: “That’s correct. We’re just using those scanning machines to test brain function during REM sleep.”

Subject: *suddenly fearful* “You expect me to sleep with those machines cutting into my brain?!”

[florida80]

Less Twilight, More Daylight

Bizarre, Health & Body, Hospital | Healthy Right | September 1, 2009


Me: “Hi, this is anesthesia. How can I help you?”

Caller: “This is the blood bank, right?”

Me: “No, this is anesthesia.”

Caller: “That’s the same thing, right?”

Me: “Not really.”

Caller: “Well, what is anesthesia?”

Me: “The stuff that puts you to sleep before surgery.”

Caller: “Well who cares about that crap!”

Me: “People who need surgery?”

Caller: “No! You know what they need? BLOOD!”

Me: “Okay… but you still have the wrong number.”

Caller: “Vampires need blood! You’re not a vampire because you don’t need blood! Humans don’t need blood!”

Me: “Sir, humans need blood just as much as a vampire.”

Caller: “Wait, so humans are vampires?”

Me: “No, they just need–”

Caller: “Holy f***! I’M A VAMPIRE! You just made my day!”

Me: “Well, no–”

Caller: “Thank you sooo much!” *click*

[florida80]

The CSR Of Delphi

Books & Reading, Bookstore, Crazy Requests, Health & Body | Healthy Right | August 5, 2009


Me: “Good evening, thank you for calling [Bookstore]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “My husband is going in for a CAT scan, and he’s kind of claustrophobic. I was wondering what kind of equipment they use?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I really don’t have that kind of information. Maybe if you called your doctor?”

Caller: “It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday night! My doctor’s office is closed, duh! That’s why I’m asking you!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we really don’t have that information.”

Caller: “Well, you have books, don’t you? Why don’t you just go and look it up in a book?”

Me: “Ma’am, we do have a small selection of home reference medical books, but I can’t look it up for you.”

Caller: “Well, you have an intercom, don’t you? Why don’t you just page a doctor and ask him to come to the phone and talk to me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We really aren’t allowed to do that sort of thing.”

Caller: “Well, can you at least connect me with the information desk, or is that too much to ask?!”

Me: “This is the information desk.”

Caller: “Well, a fat lot of good you are!” *click*

[florida80]

On The Bright Side, There Are Worse Orifices

Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Pharmacy | Healthy Right | July 15, 2009


Me: “[Pharmacy], how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, your medicine is defective.”

Me: “Sir, why don’t I get your information so I can take a look at your profile.”

Customer: *gives his name and date of birth*

Me: “I see that the last prescriptions you filled were antibiotic and drops for your ear infection. Are your symptoms still bothering you?”

Customer: “Yes, and how the h*** do you expect me to fit this giant pill in my ear?”

Me: “Sir, that’s an antibiotic tablet. It’s meant to be taken orally.”

[florida80]

Pint-Sized Purification

Crazy Requests, Medical Office, Medication | Healthy Right | June 17, 2009


Caller: “Hi, do you have any doctors that prescribe detox drugs?”

Me: “No, we don’t provide that service.”

Caller: “How do you know? You have lots of doctors. How do you know?!”

Me: “We don’t specialize in addiction treatment. Our doctors aren’t that type of practitioner.”

Caller: “Why?! What if I need them to be?”

Me: “Well, then you would have to call another office.”

Caller: “What kind of doctor’s don’t prescribe detox meds?!”

Me: “Pediatricians… ”

Caller: “Oh!” *hangs up phone*

[florida80]

The Flesh Is Bright But The Mind Is Dimming

Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Hospital | Healthy Right | June 8, 2009


Me: “Okay, sir, just a few X-rays and we’ll be done.”

Patient: “Please make it quick. I don’t want to glow when I leave!”

Me: “No, sir, I promise you won’t glow. That’s just an X-ray joke.”

Patient: “It’s dark out! I can’t glow or I’ll be seen!”

Me: “Sir, I swear you will not glow.”

Patient: “NO GLOOOWWWIINNG!”

Me: *gives up* “The glow afterward is so faint, no one will ever see it.”

Patient: “Oh… okay, then. Proceed…”

[florida80]

The (Brain) Damage Has Already Been Done

Alcohol, Call Center, Emergency Services, Germany, Health & Body | Healthy Right | May 6, 2009


(Note: 1-1-2 is Germany’s version of 9-1-1.)

Me: “1-1-2, what’s your emergency?”

Caller: “Oh, my god! Help me! Help me!”

Me: “Calm down, please. Can you tell me what happened, if someone is hurt, and where you are?”

Caller: “I’m at home, and my brain stopped working!”

Me: “Your brain… stopped working? Sir, if your brain would stop working, you would be dead. Can you tell me exactly what happened? Are you bleeding?”

Caller: “No, no. But my brain stopped working! At least half of it! Oh, my god, will the other half stop working as well?! Will I die?! My wife was right! I can’t believe it!”

(At this point, I’m unsure what to do. The man is really in a state of panic, but sounds otherwise fine.)

Me: “Sir, is your wife at home? Can I speak to her? If not, please tell me exactly what you did when your… brain stopped working.”

Caller: “I watched soccer! And drank beer! My wife always told me ‘When you don’t stop that crap, your brain will stop working’ and now it did! I was sitting on the couch and turned my head to look at the clock and suddenly I can’t move my head anymore because the left side of my brain stopped working! Help!”

Me: “Sir, it sounds like you only cricked your neck!”

(I start describing him what a cricked neck feels like and he agrees that this is indeed his problem and that he’ll see a doctor in the morning. I’m about to end the call, when…)

Caller: “Hey, dude…”

Me: “Yes?”

Caller: “Is she right?”

Me: “Who?”

Caller: “My wife. You seem to know a lot about medicine and stuff, so can my brain really stop working from watching too much soccer and drinking beer?”

Me: “Well, alcohol is known for indeed killing brain cells when you drink too much, but you won’t–”

Caller: “Oh, my god! Thank you! I thought she was only kidding me, but when you say it, then I’ll stop! Thank you so much for saving my life! Thank you!”

Me: “Wait, I didn’t say–”

Caller: *hangs up*

[florida80]

It’s Called Healthyitis

Bizarre, Doctor/Physician, Health & Body | Healthy Right | April 16, 2009


Me: “Thank you for waiting. My name is [My Name]. What is your call regarding?”

Patient: “Yeah, I want to ask the nurse a question.”

Me: “Is this regarding symptoms you are experiencing?”

Patient: “Yeah… well, kind of.”

Me: “What symptoms are you experiencing?”

Patient: “Actually, none.”

Me: “You are experiencing no symptoms?”

Patient: “Yeah… I have no pain and I just want to know if that is normal.”

[florida80]

Flattery, The Best Medicine

Emergency Services, Health & Body, Medication, Respect Your Elders | Healthy Right | August 26, 2008


(An elderly lady falls down in her apartment and has a cut on her wrist.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, I am afraid, we have to go to the hospital. You will need stitches for that cut and an X-ray to make sure your wrist isn’t broken.”

Patient: “No, I don’t wanna go. Just give me a shot and it will be okay.”

Coworker: “You mean for the pain?”

Patient: “No, so it will heal!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, I’m afraid we don’t have this kind of medication.”

Patient: “But it worked last time!”

Coworker: “Someone gave you a shot and the wrist healed by itself?”

Patient: “No, my sugar was too high and they gave me a shot and everything was okay!”

Coworker: “I see… Well, I can’t fool you; you know this stuff! Listen, I can give you a shot for the broken wrist, but this counteracts the anti-sugar medicine. So every time your sugar is too high, you can never get a shot again.”

Patient: “Never ever?”

Coworker: “Never ever again…”

Patient: “So why didn’t you just say so in the first place?”

Coworker: “Well, not every patient has such an understanding of medicine as you, so I always try to keep it simple.”

Patient: “Okay, then let’s go to the hospital.”

Coworker: “Gladly.”

[florida80]

Honey, He Ain’t A Scrapbooking Project

Crazy Requests, Great Stuff, Health & Body, Hospital | Healthy Right | July 16, 2008


(I witnessed this on the hospital floor where I work. A patient’s daughter comes out of a hospital room and stands in the hallway, staring around looking lost.)

Nurse’s aide: “Can I help you?”

Daughter: “Yeah… can I have a stapler?”

(The nurse’s aide walks about two steps away to get a stapler and then thinks better of this request.)

Nurse’s aide: “Why do you want a stapler?”

Daughter: “My dad’s IV tubing is getting in his way. I thought it would be better if we stapled it to his arm.”

Nurse’s aide: “Um, I think tape would work better for that.”

Daughter: “You guys have tape here?”

Nurse’s aide: “Yeah, I have some here in my pocket.”

(The aide walks into the room to secure the IV tubing before any more of his genius children try to help.)

Daughter: *muttering* “I still think a stapler is a better idea…”

[florida80]

8-Nov-2019

Study shows biomarker accurately diagnoses deadly infant disease


Louisiana State University Health Sciences Center


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New Orleans, LA - A diagnostic study of 136 premature infants found that a protein involved in managing harmful bacteria in the human intestine is a reliable biomarker for the noninvasive detection of necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC). Led by researchers and clinicians at LSU Health New Orleans School of Medicine, this is one of the largest prospective clinical studies in premature infants yet. Results of the study are published online in JAMA Network Open, available online at https:/​/​jamanetwork.​c om/​journals/​jamanetworkope n.

According to the National Institutes of Health, necrotizing enterocolitis is a life-threatening illness almost exclusively affecting neonates. NEC has a mortality rate as high as 50%. Inflammation of the intestine leads to bacterial invasion causing cellular damage and cell death, which causes necrosis of the colon and intestine. As NEC progresses, it can lead to intestinal perforation causing peritonitis, sepsis and death. To date, no clinical test has been established as the gold standard to diagnose NEC. X-rays are used to diagnose advanced disease, but their sensitivity can be as low as 44%.

The gut disease is one of concern in Louisiana, as it has one of the highest rates of premature birth in the country, and it disproportionately affects African American infants.

"This study exemplified academic medicine at its best," notes Sunyoung Kim, PhD, Professor of Biochemistry and Molecular Biology at LSU Health New Orleans School of Medicine and senior author. "It creates linkages between unexplained patient presentations and scientific inquiry. We were driven by the desire to build unique and useable tools to fight a disease that has been unexplained for nearly 200 years in the most fragile patient population - preemie babies."

Previous research suggested that NEC is preceded and accompanied by changes in the complex and dynamic collection of microorganisms called gut microbiota, which live in the intestine. In this study, the research team measured and analyzed the activity of the protein, intestinal alkaline phosphatase (iAP) obtained from stool samples from the babies enrolled in the study at Children's Hospital of New Orleans, Touro Infirmary, and St. Louis Children's Hospital. Clinical data collected included gestational age, birth weight, Apgar scores, delivery type, race, gender, feeding, antibiotics, laboratory and radiology results, as well as surgical notes. Eighteen percent of the babies were classified as having severe NEC; 14% had suspected NEC; and 68% were NEC control.

Since iAP activity precedes the chemical process triggering inflammation, the researchers studied the abundance and enzyme activity of iAP shed in stool to assess the correlation of two iAP biochemical measures with disease severity. They found that elevated levels of iAP protein linked to NEC were shed in the samples, but the proteins were dysfunctional in the NEC patients. The accuracy rates using iAP levels and iAP activity as markers for severe NEC were 97% and 76%, respectively. The accuracy values were similar for suspected NEC - 97% and 62%, respectively.

These results indicate that iAP biochemistry and abundance can be used as diagnostic biomarkers for both severe and suspected NEC. Significantly, iAP measures were not biomarkers for sepsis, another potentially fatal condition that can exhibit symptoms similar to NEC. A correct diagnosis is crucial to treatment decisions.

The biomarker has doubled the diagnostic identification of the disease, compared to the current gold standard - a milestone important at both the bench and the bedside.

"Intestinal AP is the first candidate diagnostic biomarker, unique in its predictive value for NEC," reports Dr. Kim. "It is correlated only with NEC and is not associated with sepsis or other non-GI infections. The clinical potential of this noninvasive tool lies in its use to identify infants most at risk to develop NEC, to facilitate management of feeding and antibiotic regimens, and monitor response to treatment."

Besides Kim, other members of the research team from LSU Health New Orleans included Drs. Maya Heath, Zeromeh Gerber, Brian Barkemeyer and Duna Penn in the Section of Neonatology in the Department of Pediatrics; Rebecca Buckley, PhD, and Porcha Davis in the Department of Biochemistry and Molecular Biology; and Zhide Fang, PhD, in the Department of Biostatistics in the School of Public Health. Misty Good, MD, Laura Linneman, RN, and Qingqing Gong, PhD, from Washington University School of Medicine and St. Louis Children's Hospital, also participated in the research.

The research was supported by funding from the National Institutes of Health, National Science Foundation, March of Dimes, Louisiana Board of Regents, Children's Discovery Institute at Washington University and St. Louis Children's Hospital, Department of Pediatrics at Washington University School of Medicine, LSU Health New Orleans School of Medicine and LSU Health Foundation.

Kim is the founder of a spin-out company, Chosen Diagnostics Inc., whose business interests are related to this project. The company is considering an option to license its diagnostic test developed from this work. Dr. Misty Good has financial relationships with Abbott Laboratories and Astarte Medical Partners.

"What began as a collaboration between Biochemistry and Pediatrics at LSU Health New Orleans School of Medicine to address a life-threatening condition has grown into a multicenter national partnership," concludes Kim. "We are working hard here at LSU Health to create solutions for people in our state and to use our discoveries to help infants across the country."

[florida80]

7-Nov-2019

Intended to help human, planetary health, EAT-Lancet diet too costly for 1.6 billion people BOSTON and WASHINGTON, D.C. (Nov. 7, 2019, 6:30 p.m. EST)-- A new study estimates that a diet meant to improve both human and planetary health would be unaffordable for at least 1.58 billion people, mostly in sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia.

Earlier this year, the EAT-Lancet Commission on Food, Planet, Health published recommendations for a universal diet that addresses both human and planetary health. The Commission suggested that adherence to this diet could ensure that our future food systems can sustainably and nutritiously feed the estimated population of 10 billion people in 2050.

The study published today in The Lancet Global Health - from researchers at the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University and the International Food Policy Research Institute (IFPRI) - sought to address what many felt was one of the main components lacking in the creation of the recommended diet, namely affordability.

"When formulating this pioneering benchmark diet - addressing individual health outcomes as well as the health of the planet - the Commission deliberately did not take its cost into account," said senior and corresponding author Will Masters, an economist at the Friedman School of Nutrition at Tufts.

The research team also found that the EAT-Lancet diet was 64 percent more costly than the lowest-cost combination of foods that would provide a balanced mix of 20 essential nutrients. The EAT-Lancet diet has higher quantities of animal-source foods and fruits and vegetables than the minimum required for nutrient adequacy, and much higher quantities than are now consumed in low-income countries.

"We found that the global median of the proposed diet would cost $2.84 per day as of 2011. In low-income countries, that amounts to 89.1 percent of a household's daily per capita income, which is more than people can actually spend on food. In high-income countries, we found that the EAT-Lancet reference diet would cost 6.1 percent of per-capita income, which is often less than what people now spend on food," said Kalle Hirvonen, the lead author and development economist in Ethiopia at the International Food Policy Research Institute.

The EAT-Lancet Commission diet consists of a large amount of vegetables, fruits, whole grain, legumes, nuts and unsaturated oils, some seafood and poultry, and little to no red meat, processed meat, added sugar, refined grains, and starchy vegetables.

Fruits, vegetables, and animal-source foods are often the most expensive components of a healthy diet, but prices vary widely around the world, report the researchers.

To compute the affordability of an EAT-Lancet diet in each country, the researchers drew on retail prices for standardized items obtained through the International Comparison Program, a collaboration between the World Bank and country statistical agencies. They used prices for 744 food items in 159 countries, from which they could identify the lowest-cost combination of items in each country to meet EAT-Lancet criteria. They then did the same for nutrient requirements, and compared the cost of food in each country to survey data on household expenditure and income per capita from the World Bank's PovcalNet system.

"Although 1.58 billion is a lot of people, it is actually a conservative lower limit on the total number who cannot afford the diet recommended by the EAT-Lancet Commission. The cost of food preparation and of non-food necessities ensure that an even larger number of people cannot afford that kind of healthy diet," said Masters.

"Even if many poor consumers were to aspire to consume healthier and more environmentally sustainable foods, income and price constraints frequently render this diet unaffordable. Increased earnings and safety-net transfers, as well as systemic changes to lower food prices, are needed to bring healthy and sustainable diets within reach of the world's poor," concluded Hirvonen.

Limitations to the study include that the models count only the least expensive items in each country, so other research would be needed to address the additional costs and barriers to food use imposed by time constraints, tastes and preferences. Additionally, the study used 2011 prices and nationally aggregated data, so next steps include research on variation within countries as well as over time. There is also uncertainty regarding the nutritional content of the foods whose prices were used in the study's models.

###

Additional authors on this study are Derek Headey, a senior research fellow at the International Food Policy Research Institute, and Yan Bai, a Ph.D. student at the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy.

This work was supported by the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, through a project entitled Changing Access to Nutritious Diets in Africa and South Asia, and another project entitled Advancing Research on Nutrition and Agriculture.

Hirvonen, K., Bai, Y., Headey, D., and Masters, W.A. (2019). Affordability of the EAT-Lancet reference diet: A global analysis. The Lancet Global Health, online Nov. 7, 2019, doi: 10.1016/ S2214-109X(19)30447-4

About the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University

The Gerald J. and Dorothy R. Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University is the only independent school of nutrition in the United States. The school's five divisions - which focus on questions relating to nutrition and chronic diseases, molecular nutrition, agriculture and sustainability, food security, humanitarian assistance, public health nutrition, and food policy and economics - are renowned for the application of scientific research to national and international policy.

About the International Food Policy Research Institute

The International Food Policy Research Institute (IFPRI) seeks sustainable solutions for ending hunger and poverty. IFPRI was established in 1975 to identify and analyze alternative national and international strategies and policies for meeting the food needs of the developing world, with particular emphasis on low-income countries and on the poorer groups in those countries. Visit: http://www.​ifpri.​org

[florida80]

Neurosurgery in Brazilian Amazon is possible

A Rutgers study presents a model for creating a sustainable neurosurgery programs in poor, remote locations

Rutgers University


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Low- and middle-income countries in remote locations with little access to care can create sustainable neurosurgical programs by recruiting and training young, local doctors, according to a Rutgers study.

Published in the journal World Neurosurgery, the study analyzed the effectiveness over the past 20 years of a successful neurosurgical department, its residency program, an international residency rotation and a medical student exchange program, all in Santarém, a poor, remote region of Brazil in the Amazon rainforest.

Access to care for residents of Brazil's rural north, where Santarém is located, depends on finding affordable transportation to the region's only municipal hospital, which serves an area larger than Texas with limited resources.

Specialized care is almost non-existent. Patients whose conditions cannot be treated locally are transferred to larger regional hospitals. Researchers say attracting medical residents and attending physicians to the remote location - where there is one neurosurgeon for every 200,000 to 500,000 people - has been difficult due to low pay and a lack of surgical supplies.

But what improved conditions and created more access for patients, Rutgers researchers said, is a five-year neurosurgery residency program started in 2014 that has led to upgraded facilities and new surgical equipment as well as expanded partnerships between academic and regional training centers. The program - which adds one new resident who splits clinical duties between the municipal and regional hospital - helped attract surgeons who could navigate health care barriers and work with limited resources.

"Having worked in the Santarém hospital system, I was fascinated by how it was able to create a sustainable neurosurgical program to care for people in a poor area with limited resources by using doctors who were from the local area," said lead author Nicole Silva, a medical student at Rutgers New Jersey Medical School.

The study also looked at neurological health issues, including those of indigenous people, that are unique to the region. Researchers found that neurological surgeries were performed for brain and spinal injuries from shallow water diving, falls from enormous Amazonian trees and from being struck by falling fruit as well as for neurosurgical care, such as spine surgeries, tumor surgeries and hydrocephalus treatment.

"Understanding the effect the environment has on patients from rural Amazonian communities has distinguished the young neurosurgeons of this region from those who trained in the traditional model in Brazil," Silva said. "I was inspired by these doctors who came from the area. They knew they wouldn't be compensated well but considered it a source of pride to provide care for people in the community where they were raised."

The researchers are encouraging other areas with barriers to neurological care to investigate replicating the program in Brazil. "It would require support from the established medical system of that country, a hospital with surgical suite capabilities, attending physicians and medical residents supported by residency education of their healthcare system and medical education system," said Silva. "Each one of these factors differ immensely among low- to middle-income countries worldwide."

[florida80]

Combined tests can predict kidney injury risk in critically ill children

Washington, DC (November 10, 2019) -- Combining 2 tests can improve predictions of severe acute kidney injury in children in intensive care. The findings come from a study that will be presented at ASN Kidney Week 2019 November 5-November 10 at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center in Washington, DC.

Two assessments--the Renal Angina Index (RAI) and measurement of urinary Neutrophil Gelatinase Associated Lipocalin (NGAL)--can be used to determine patients' risk of developing severe acute kidney injury. Kelli Krallman (Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center) and her colleagues looked to determine the potential benefits of combining these assessments.

The team's analysis included 627 pediatric intensive care unit (PICU) admissions. The RAI calculated at 12 hours was found to be a significant predictor of the development of severe acute kidney injury during PICU days 2-4. Adding urinary NGAL assessments for those at risk based off a high RAI score improved the prediction significantly. These RAI+/NGAL+ patients were not only at higher risk for severe acute kidney injury, but also for the need of kidney replacement therapy such as dialysis, longer PICU stay, and longer hospital stay.

"Integration of the RAI and urinary NGAL assessments can be used early in the PICU course to identify patients truly at risk for acute kidney injury and its associated morbidity," said Krallman.

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Ultrasound to guide treatment strategy not beneficial in early RA


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented this week at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, a treatment strategy guided by ultrasound information use does not appear to provide better treatment decisions in patients with early rheumatoid arthritis. The study didn't find any additional reduction in MRI inflammation or structural damage when compared to a conventional treat-to-target strategy (Abstract #280).

Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is the most common type of autoimmune arthritis. It is caused when the immune system (the body's defense system) is not working properly. RA causes pain and swelling in the wrist and small joints of the hand and feet. While there is no cure, treatments for RA can stop joint pain and swelling, but early treatment provides better results.

Researchers at Diakonhjemmet Hospital in Oslo, Norway wanted to determine whether treatment outcomes in early RA can be improved by targeting imaging remission, assessed by ultrasound in addition to clinical remission. Previous results from the ARCTIC and TaSER trials (Haavardsholm et al. BMJ 2016; Dale et al. ARD 2016), did not show that adding structured ultrasound assessment to a treat-to-target strategy was beneficial to early RA patients. However, results from both of those studies showed a trend toward less radiographic progression in the ultrasound arms.

"Patients who have been seemingly successfully treated and are free of clinical signs and symptoms of disease may continue to develop permanent structural joint damage. There is a need to find better ways to identify these patients and prevent this development," says Espen A. Haavardsholm, MD, PhD a rheumatologist at Diakonhjemmet Hospital and the study's senior author. "The purpose of this follow-up study was to use MRI, which is reliable, objective and more sensitive than X-ray, to make a secondary assessment of inflammatory activity and structural damage progression in the two study arms. If there really were a difference, we would expect to see it in the MRI results."

The randomized trial used data from the ARCTIC trial, including 230 DMARD-naïve patients with early RA who were aged 18 to 75. Patients were randomized 1:1 to follow either an ultrasound-guided strategy targeting DAS (Disease Activity Score) of less than 1.6 with no swollen joints and no power-Doppler signal in any joint, or a conventional strategy targeting DAS of less than 1.6 and no swollen joints. Treatment for all patients began with methotrexate, then escalated to combination therapy with methotrexate/sulfasalazine/hydroxychloroquine, then a biologic DMARD.

In the ultrasound group, patients stepped up their treatment if the ultrasound score indicated a need, overruling the DAS or swollen joint count results. MRI was performed six times on patients' dominant hand, then scored in chronological order by a blinded reader, according to the OMERACT RA MRI Scoring System. There were 218 patients, or 116 using ultrasound-guided strategy and 102 using a conventional strategy, who had MRI at the study's baseline and one or more follow-up visits, and their MRI results were analyzed.

The study's results showed no statistically significant baseline differences between the two treatment groups in either of the combined MRI scores. The mean combined MRI inflammation score decreased during the first year in the ultrasound group by -64.2 and in the conventional strategy group by -59.4, and these scores were maintained at the same level throughout the second year of follow-up. There was no significant difference in change from baseline between the two groups at any time. The mean combined MRI damage score showed a small increase over time, without any significant difference between the two groups. In the ultrasound group, 39 percent of patients had MRI erosive progression compared to 33 percent in the conventional strategy group.

"Our findings confirm the main conclusion from the ARCTIC trial that targeting ultrasound remission does not lead to improved results," says professor Haavardsholm. "The main message is that people with RA should be diagnosed and started on treatment early, monitored closely, and treatment should be stepped up aggressively until the target of clinical remission is reached. This strategy has proven very successful. However, going beyond this by aiming to also achieve imaging remission increases treatment cost and effort, but does not significantly further improve the results.

So, the ARCTIC trial does not support inclusion of ultrasound examination as a routine measure to guide treatment in early RA. Ultrasound might be a useful tool in other settings, such as when clinical findings are inconclusive. For patients, this means that if you feel that the medication has worked, your joints feel well and your rheumatologist cannot find any signs of active joint inflammation by physical examination, there is in most cases no need to go through additional imaging exams to determine that your disease is under satisfactory control with your current medication."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Rising rates of kidney injury in women who are hospitalized during pregnancy


American Society of Nephrology


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Washington, DC (November 9, 2019) -- A recent analysis reveals increasing rates of acute kidney injury in women who are hospitalized during pregnancy, especially among those with diabetes. Also, women with pregnancy-related acute kidney injury were much more likely to die while in the hospital than those without kidney injury. The findings will be presented at ASN Kidney Week 2019 November 5-November 10 at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center in Washington, DC.

Kidney injury during pregnancy is associated with significant maternal and fetal morbidity and mortality. To study the issue, Silvi Shah, MD (University of Cincinnati) and her colleagues analyzed records from the 2006-2015 Nationwide Inpatient Sample, a US database containing information on more than 7 million hospital stays each year.

The researchers identified 42,190,790 hospitalizations during pregnancy, and the overall rate of hospitalizations involving acute kidney injury was 0.08%. The rate increased from 0.04% in 2006 to 0.12% in 2015. Women with pregnancy-related acute kidney injury were older than those who did not develop acute kidney injury. Pregnancy-related acute kidney injury occurred at a higher rate in black women than white women, and in women with diabetes than in those without diabetes. The rate of pregnancy-related hospitalization involving acute kidney injury in diabetic women increased from 0.36% in 2006 to 1.10% in 2015.

Higher rates were observed in southern and midwest geographical regions than in the northeast region, and in urban teaching hospitals than in urban non-teaching hospitals and rural hospitals.

Women with pregnancy-related acute kidney injury were much more likely to die while in the hospital than those without kidney injury (3.98% vs. 0.01%).

"The findings of our study may necessitate change in nationwide policies regarding obstetric care of women and emphasize the need for kidney health monitoring for women hospitalized during pregnancy and during their outpatient prenatal visits," said Dr. Shah

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Study points to new weapon in fight against lethal fungi


Monash University


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• Monash University researchers have gained insights into how nanoparticles could develop a biosensor to prevent deadly diseases contracted on medical equipment, such as catheters.
• Candida albicans can become a serious problem for people who are seriously ill or immune-suppressed.


Researchers at Monash University have gained insights into how nanoparticles could be used to identify the presence of invasive and sometimes deadly microbes, and deliver targeted treatments more effectively.

This study was conducted as an interdisciplinary collaboration between microbiologists, immunologists and engineers led by Dr Simon Corrie from Monash University's Department of Chemical Engineering and Professor Ana Traven from the Monash Biomedicine Discovery Institute (BDI). It was recently published in the American Chemical Society journal ACS Applied Interfaces and Material.

Candida albicans, a commonly found microbe, can turn deadly when it colonises on devices such as catheters implanted in the human body. While commonly found in healthy people, this microbe can become a serious problem for those who are seriously ill or immune-suppressed.

The microbe forms a biofilm when it colonises using, for example, a catheter as a source of infection. It then spreads into the bloodstream to infect internal organs.

"The mortality rate in some patient populations can be as high as 30 to 40 per cent even if you treat people. When it colonises, it's highly resistant to anti-fungal treatments," Professor Traven said.

"The idea is that if you can diagnose this infection early, then you can have a much bigger chance of treating it successfully with current anti-fungal drugs and stopping a full-blown systemic infection, but our current diagnostic methods are lacking. A biosensor to detect early stages of colonisation would be highly beneficial."

The researchers investigated the effects of organosilica nanoparticles of different sizes, concentrations and surface coatings to see whether and how they interacted with both C. albicans and with immune cells in the blood.

They found that the nanoparticles bound to fungal cells, but were non-toxic to them.

"They don't kill the microbe, but we can make an anti-fungal particle by binding them to a known anti-fungal drug," Professor Traven said.

The researchers also demonstrated that the particles associate with neutrophils - human white blood cells - in a similar way as they did with C. albicans, remaining noncytotoxic towards them.

"We've identified that these nanoparticles, and by inference a number of different types of nanoparticles, can be made to be interactive with cells of interest," Dr Corrie said.

"We can actually change the surface properties by attaching different things; thereby we can really change the interactions they have with these cells - that's quite significant."

Dr Corrie said while nanoparticles were being investigated in the treatment of cancer, the use of nanoparticle-based technologies in infectious diseases lags behind the cancer nanomedicine field, despite the great potential for new treatments and diagnostics.

"The other unique thing in this study is that rather than using cells grown in culture, we're also looking at how particles act in whole human blood and with neutrophils extracted from fresh human blood," he said.

Professor Traven said the study had benefited greatly from interdisciplinary collaboration.

"We've brought together labs with expertise in infection, microbiology and immunology with a lab that has expertise in engineering, to do state-of-the-art experiments," she said

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Hospitalizations among dialysis patients are higher in areas with more black residents


American Society of Nephrology


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Washington, DC (November 9, 2019) -- Patients with kidney failure who receive hemodialysis at US clinics located in residential areas with a high percentage of Black residents are more likely to be hospitalized than those who receive hemodialysis in communities with a lower percentage of Black residents. The findings come from a study that will be presented at ASN Kidney Week 2019 November 5-November 10 at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center in Washington, DC.

The analysis, conducted by Ladan Golestaneh MD, MS (Albert Einstein College of Medicine/Montefiore Medical Center) and her colleagues, included 4,567 patients on hemodialysis from 154 facilities in 127 zip codes in the United States. Patients receiving dialysis in communities with a high percentage of Black residents had higher hospitalization rates (32% higher for communities with ?14.4% Blacks vs. those with ?1.8% Blacks), despite having equivalent dialysis care. The association remained after adjusting for individual race, clinical comorbidities, community level poverty, and dialysis quality and adherence.

"Higher risk for hospitalization in communities with a high percentage of Blacks is likely not a result of differences in quality of dialysis care, adherence practices, or clinical factors, but rather a result of as yet unidentified community level determinants of health," said Dr. Golestaneh. "Healthcare disparities continue to exist even after measures taken by Centers for Medicare and Medicaid services to bridge the quality gap, through measures such as the dialysis Quality Incentive Program, to promote high-quality services in outpatient dialysis facilities in communities across the U.S."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Biologics offer similar disease activity improvement for elderly & young-onset RA patients


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented this week at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, both patients with rheumatoid arthritis whose disease onset occurred at an older age and those whose disease onset occurred earlier in life have similar improvements in clinical disease at 48 weeks after starting biologic disease-modifying antirheumatic drugs, as well as similar drug maintenance and adverse events discontinuation rates (Abstract #1345 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1345) ).

Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is the most common type of autoimmune arthritis and it is a chronic disease that causes joint pain, stiffness, swelling and decreased movement of the joints. Small joints in the hands and feet are most commonly affected. Sometimes RA can affect your organs, such as eyes, skin or lungs.

"Patients with elderly-onset RA could present with higher disease activities and increased disabilities as compared to those with young-onset RA. Despite this, previous studies showed elderly patients receive biologics less frequently than younger individuals, suggesting patients with elderly-onset RA are potently undertreated," says Sadao Jinno, MD, MSc, instructor of rheumatology at Kobe University School of Medicine and the study's lead author. "On the other hand, in our daily practice, we have seen many elderly-onset RA patients treated with biologics effectively and safely. We wanted to investigate if there are differences in efficacy and safety of biologics between the two age groups."

Researchers in Japan conducted the study with 7,183 patients with RA who were age 18 or older and enrolled in a Japanese multicenter observational registry between September 2009 and December 2017. The patients also had to have a 3.2 or higher on the Disease Activity Score in 28 joints (DAS-28) and erythrocyte sedimentation rate measurement when they started biologics.

They assessed the relationship between age of RA onset and the clinical effectiveness of therapy at 48 weeks. The primary outcome for the study was a Clinical Disease Activity Index (CDAI) score at 48 weeks. Secondary outcomes included biologic retention at 48 weeks, achievement of a clinical disease activity index remission and low disease activity, or remission.

Among the patients on biologics, there were less in the elderly-onset RA group compared to the young-onset RA group. Of 989 patients who initiated biologics, 364 (37 percent) were elderly-onset. After adjusting for differences in baseline characteristics between the two age groups, researchers found no significant differences in the CDAI scores at 48 weeks. They did find a trend toward lower index remission rates in the elderly-onset group, but low disease activity/remission rates were similar between the two groups.

"Our findings showed there were no significant differences in Clinical Disease Activity Index scores at 48 weeks between elderly-onset and young-onset RA, suggesting biologics can be used for those with elderly-onset RA as effectively as for those with young-onset RA. We also found there was no difference of adverse event discontinuation rates between the two groups," says Dr. Jinno. "Clinicians should choose wisely which patients with elderly-onset RA are safely treated with biologics given that they are still at risk of developing adverse events, especially infections. Next, we plan to investigate if patients with elderly-onset RA respond differently to various modes of biologics."

[florida80]

Nov-2019

A 'worker' that flies: Chinese researchers design novel flying robot


Chinese Academy of Sciences Headquarters


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IMAGE


IMAGE: The contact aerial manipulator system view more 

Credit: Image by MENG Xiangdong

Skyscrapers are rising rapidly around the world, continuously transforming city skylines. However, their repair and maintenance is becoming more and more difficult. So, who can safely perform the job? Will a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man help out?

No, but Chinese researchers at the Shenyang Institute of Automation (SIA) of the Chinese Academy of Sciences have designed a promising alternative.

Recently, they reported the development of a contact aerial manipulator system that shows high flexibility and strong mission adaptability. They presented their findings at the 2019 IEEE/RSJ International Conference on Intelligent Robots and Systems (IROS 2019), an international conference on robotics and intelligent systems held from Nov. 4-8 in Macao.

Traditionally, regular inspection of high-rise buildings with glass curtain walls has been conducted by humans with gondola systems, which can be very dangerous, costly and inefficient.

The new robot represents a major advance in safety and efficiency. It comprises a single-degree-of-freedom manipulator cube-frame end effector and a hex-rotor UAV system.

Compared with general wall-climbing robots, it is capable of avoiding obstacles and even jumping over grooves on wall surfaces. It can also conduct interactive operations while in flight. Importantly, it has been designed so that the whole system's contact force can be controlled precisely without any force sensors.

"How to control the force is considered the most difficult problem, since flying robots usually are sensitive to external force," said MENG Xiangdong, the robot's designer.

MENG said realizing this objective required first making a flying robot with closed loop control behave like a regular spring system. He said that the elastic coefficient could then be easily changed by altering the control parameters. "It means that we can take the robot as a spring system so that the contact process can be safe enough," said MENG.

The research team also conducted experiments to test the system. For example, the researchers fixed a light switch to a wall, then had the robot press the switch to turn the light on and off. The robot was able to safely and smoothly operate the switch via precise force control. In another experiment, the robot smoothly moved along a glass wall, exerting fixed pressure. The robot then used a pen attached to the end of the aerial manipulator to write "SIA" - for Shenyang Institute of Automation - on the glass wall.

"In the near future, we might see an extensive use of this new system in large infrastructure maintenance, and other special applications, such as scientific sampling." said MENG.

[florida80]

Nov-2019

New X-ray technology could revolutionize how doctors identify abnormalities


University of Maryland Baltimore County


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Using ground-breaking technology, researchers at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County (UMBC) and University of Baltimore (UMB) are testing a new method of X-ray imaging that uses color to identify microfractures in bones. Microfractures were previously impossible to see using standard X-ray imaging. The findings associated with this advancement in color (spectral) CT (computed tomography) imaging are published in Advanced Functional Materials.

Since the discovery of X-rays in 1895, the basics of the technology have remained consistent. Doctors and scientists use them to see dense materials, like bones, but the technology's capabilities have been limited. Dipanjan Pan, professor of chemical, biochemical and environmental engineering UMBC, and professor of radiology at UMB, is the corresponding author of this new study. Looking ahead to the next generation of X-ray technology, he asks, "How can we detect a bone microcrack, something that is not visible using X-ray imaging?"

Pan explains that to examine this question, his lab developed nanoparticles that navigate and attach specifically to areas where microcracks exist. He likes to call them "GPS particles." They started conducting this research at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. The researchers have programmed the particles to latch onto the correct area of the microcrack. Once the particles attach to microcracks, they remain there, which is crucial to the imaging process.

The particles contain the element hafnium. A new X-ray-based technique developed by a New Zealand-based company MARS then take CT images of the body and the hafnium particles appear in color. This provides a very clear image of where the bone microcracks are located.

Hafnium is used because its composition makes it detectable to X-rays, generating a signal that can then be used to image the cracks. Pan's lab showed that hafnium is stable enough to be used in testing involving living creatures, and can be excreted safely from the body. The lab has not yet begun testing on humans, but the technology to do so may be available as soon as 2020.

As for other applications for spectral CT imaging with this hafnium breakthrough, the research suggests that this methodology could be used to detect much more serious problems. For example, in order to determine whether a person has a blockage in their heart, doctors often will perform a stress test to detect abnormalities, which comes with a significant amount of risk. One day in the near future, doctors may be able to use spectral CT to determine whether there is a blockage in organs.

"Regular CT does not have a soft-tissue contrast. It cannot tell you where your blood vessels are. Spectral CT can help solve that problem," Pan explains. He notes that although more research is needed to begin using spectral CT in this way, he anticipates that it will be a "tremendous" new tool for radiologists. Dr. Fatemeh Ostadhossein, a recent graduate of the Pan lab, was first author on this study

[florida80]

-Nov-2019

Using AI to predict where and when lightning will strike


Ecole Polytechnique Fédérale de Lausanne


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Lightning is one of the most unpredictable phenomena in nature. It regularly kills people and animals and sets fire to homes and forests. It keeps aircraft grounded and damages power lines, wind turbines and solar-panel installations. However, little is known about what triggers lightning, and there is no simple technology for predicting when and where lightning will strike the ground.

At EPFL's School of Engineering, researchers in the Electromagnetic Compatibility Laboratory, led by Farhad Rachidi, have developed a simple and inexpensive system that can predict when lightning will strike to the nearest 10 to 30 minutes, within a 30-kilometer radius. The system uses a combination of standard meteorological data and artificial intelligence. The research paper has been published in Climate and Atmospheric Science, a Nature partner journal. The researchers are now planning to use their technology in the European Laser Lightning Rod project (see inset).

"Current systems are slow and very complex, and they require expensive external data acquired by radar or satellite," explains Amirhossein Mostajabi, the PhD student who came up with the technique. "Our method uses data that can be obtained from any weather station. That means we can cover remote regions that are out of radar and satellite range and where communication networks are unavailable."

What's more, because the data can be acquired easily and in real time, predictions can be made very quickly - and alerts can be issued even before a storm has formed.

Training the machine using available data

The EPFL researchers' method uses a machine-learning algorithm that has been trained to recognize conditions that lead to lightning. To carry out the training, the researchers used data collected over a ten-year period from 12 Swiss weather stations, located in both urban and mountainous areas.

Four parameters were taken into account: atmospheric pressure, air temperature, relative humidity and wind speed. Those parameters were correlated with recordings from lightning detection and location systems. Using that method, the algorithm was able to learn the conditions under which lightning occurs.

Once trained, the system made predictions that proved correct almost 80% of the time.

This is the first time that a system based on simple meteorological data has been able to predict lightning strikes through real-time calculations. The method offers a simple way of predicting a complex phenomenon.

[florida80]

Nov-2019

Flexible yet sturdy robot is designed to 'grow' like a plant

Its extendable appendage can meander through tight spaces and then lift heavy loads

Massachusetts Institute of Technology


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IMAGE: The new "growing robot " can be programmed to grow, or extend, in different directions, based on the sequence of chain units that are locked and fed out from the "growing... view more 

Credit: Image courtesy of Harry Asada, Tongxi Yan, Emily Kamienski and Seiichi Teshigawara

In today's factories and warehouses, it's not uncommon to see robots whizzing about, shuttling items or tools from one station to another. For the most part, robots navigate pretty easily across open layouts. But they have a much harder time winding through narrow spaces to carry out tasks such as reaching for a product at the back of a cluttered shelf, or snaking around a car's engine parts to unscrew an oil cap.

Now MIT engineers have developed a robot designed to extend a chain-like appendage flexible enough to twist and turn in any necessary configuration, yet rigid enough to support heavy loads or apply torque to assemble parts in tight spaces. When the task is complete, the robot can retract the appendage and extend it again, at a different length and shape, to suit the next task.

The appendage design is inspired by the way plants grow, which involves the transport of nutrients, in a fluidized form, up to the plant's tip. There, they are converted into solid material to produce, bit by bit, a supportive stem.

Likewise, the robot consists of a "growing point," or gearbox, that pulls a loose chain of interlocking blocks into the box. Gears in the box then lock the chain units together and feed the chain out, unit by unit, as a rigid appendage.

The researchers presented the plant-inspired "growing robot" this week at the IEEE International Conference on Intelligent Robots and Systems (IROS) in Macau. They envision that grippers, cameras, and other sensors could be mounted onto the robot's gearbox, enabling it to meander through an aircraft's propulsion system and tighten a loose screw, or to reach into a shelf and grab a product without disturbing the organization of surrounding inventory, among other tasks.

"Think about changing the oil in your car," says Harry Asada, professor of mechanical engineering at MIT. "After you open the engine roof, you have to be flexible enough to make sharp turns, left and right, to get to the oil filter, and then you have to be strong enough to twist the oil filter cap to remove it."

"Now we have a robot that can potentially accomplish such tasks," says Tongxi Yan, a former graduate student in Asada's lab, who led the work. "It can grow, retract, and grow again to a different shape, to adapt to its environment."

The team also includes MIT graduate student Emily Kamienski and visiting scholar Seiichi Teshigawara, who presented the results at the conference.

The last foot

The design of the new robot is an offshoot of Asada's work in addressing the "last one-foot problem" -- an engineering term referring to the last step, or foot, of a robot's task or exploratory mission. While a robot may spend most of its time traversing open space, the last foot of its mission may involve more nimble navigation through tighter, more complex spaces to complete a task.

Engineers have devised various concepts and prototypes to address the last one-foot problem, including robots made from soft, balloon-like materials that grow like vines to squeeze through narrow crevices. But Asada says such soft extendable robots aren't sturdy enough to support "end effectors," or add-ons such as grippers, cameras, and other sensors that would be necessary in carrying out a task, once the robot has wormed its way to its destination.

"Our solution is not actually soft, but a clever use of rigid materials," says Asada, who is the Ford Foundation Professor of Engineering.

Chain links

Once the team defined the general functional elements of plant growth, they looked to mimic this in a general sense, in an extendable robot.

"The realization of the robot is totally different from a real plant, but it exhibits the same kind of functionality, at a certain abstract level," Asada says.

The researchers designed a gearbox to represent the robot's "growing tip," akin to the bud of a plant, where, as more nutrients flow up to the site, the tip feeds out more rigid stem. Within the box, they fit a system of gears and motors, which works to pull up a fluidized material -- in this case, a bendy sequence of 3-D-printed plastic units interlocked with each other, similar to a bicycle chain.

As the chain is fed into the box, it turns around a winch, which feeds it through a second set of motors programmed to lock certain units in the chain to their neighboring units, creating a rigid appendage as it is fed out of the box.

The researchers can program the robot to lock certain units together while leaving others unlocked, to form specific shapes, or to "grow" in certain directions. In experiments, they were able to program the robot to turn around an obstacle as it extended or grew out from its base.

"It can be locked in different places to be curved in different ways, and have a wide range of motions," Yan says.

When the chain is locked and rigid, it is strong enough to support a heavy, one-pound weight. If a gripper were attached to the robot's growing tip, or gearbox, the researchers say the robot could potentially grow long enough to meander through a narrow space, then apply enough torque to loosen a bolt or unscrew a cap.

Auto maintenance is a good example of tasks the robot could assist with, according to Kamienski. "The space under the hood is relatively open, but it's that last bit where you have to navigate around an engine block or something to get to the oil filter, that a fixed arm wouldn't be able to navigate around. This robot could do something like that."

###

[florida80]

Study points to new weapon in fight against lethal fungi


Monash University


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• Monash University researchers have gained insights into how nanoparticles could develop a biosensor to prevent deadly diseases contracted on medical equipment, such as catheters.
• Candida albicans can become a serious problem for people who are seriously ill or immune-suppressed.


Researchers at Monash University have gained insights into how nanoparticles could be used to identify the presence of invasive and sometimes deadly microbes, and deliver targeted treatments more effectively.

This study was conducted as an interdisciplinary collaboration between microbiologists, immunologists and engineers led by Dr Simon Corrie from Monash University's Department of Chemical Engineering and Professor Ana Traven from the Monash Biomedicine Discovery Institute (BDI). It was recently published in the American Chemical Society journal ACS Applied Interfaces and Material.

Candida albicans, a commonly found microbe, can turn deadly when it colonises on devices such as catheters implanted in the human body. While commonly found in healthy people, this microbe can become a serious problem for those who are seriously ill or immune-suppressed.

The microbe forms a biofilm when it colonises using, for example, a catheter as a source of infection. It then spreads into the bloodstream to infect internal organs.

"The mortality rate in some patient populations can be as high as 30 to 40 per cent even if you treat people. When it colonises, it's highly resistant to anti-fungal treatments," Professor Traven said.

"The idea is that if you can diagnose this infection early, then you can have a much bigger chance of treating it successfully with current anti-fungal drugs and stopping a full-blown systemic infection, but our current diagnostic methods are lacking. A biosensor to detect early stages of colonisation would be highly beneficial."

The researchers investigated the effects of organosilica nanoparticles of different sizes, concentrations and surface coatings to see whether and how they interacted with both C. albicans and with immune cells in the blood.

They found that the nanoparticles bound to fungal cells, but were non-toxic to them.

"They don't kill the microbe, but we can make an anti-fungal particle by binding them to a known anti-fungal drug," Professor Traven said.

The researchers also demonstrated that the particles associate with neutrophils - human white blood cells - in a similar way as they did with C. albicans, remaining noncytotoxic towards them.

"We've identified that these nanoparticles, and by inference a number of different types of nanoparticles, can be made to be interactive with cells of interest," Dr Corrie said.

"We can actually change the surface properties by attaching different things; thereby we can really change the interactions they have with these cells - that's quite significant."

Dr Corrie said while nanoparticles were being investigated in the treatment of cancer, the use of nanoparticle-based technologies in infectious diseases lags behind the cancer nanomedicine field, despite the great potential for new treatments and diagnostics.

"The other unique thing in this study is that rather than using cells grown in culture, we're also looking at how particles act in whole human blood and with neutrophils extracted from fresh human blood," he said.

Professor Traven said the study had benefited greatly from interdisciplinary collaboration.

"We've brought together labs with expertise in infection, microbiology and immunology with a lab that has expertise in engineering, to do state-of-the-art experiments," she said.

[florida80]

Stress hormone helps control the circadian rhythm of brain cells


University of Copenhagen The Faculty of Health and Medical Sciences


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IMAGE: Cross-section of rat brain. To make sure that the suprachiasmatic nucleus had been properly deactivated, the researchers subsequently examined several histologies such as this one. view more 

Credit: Department of Neuroscience, University of Copenhagen

As day turns into night, and night turns into day, the vast majority of living organisms follow a fixed circadian rhythm that controls everything from sleep needs to body temperature.

This internal clock is found in everything from bacteria to humans and is controlled by some very distinct hereditary genes, known as clock genes.

In the brain, clock genes are particularly active in the so-called suprachiasmatic nucleus. It sits just above the point where the optic nerves cross and sends signals to the brain about the surrounding light level. From here, the suprachiasmatic nucleus regulates the rhythm of a number of other areas of the body, including the cerebellum and the cerebral cortex.

However, these three areas of the brain are not directly linked by neurons, and this made researchers at the University of Copenhagen curious. Using test rats, they have now demonstrated that the circadian rhythm is controlled by means of signalling agents in the blood, such as the stress hormone corticosterone.

'In humans, the hormone is known as cortisol, and although the sleep rhythm in rats is the opposite of ours, we basically have the same hormonal system', says Associate Professor Martin Fredensborg Rath of the Department of Neuroscience.

He explains that recent years have seen an increasing, scientific focus on research on clock genes, one reason being that previous research on clock genes have found a correlation between depression and irregularities in the body's circadian rhythms.

New Method with Medical Micropumps

In the study with the stress hormone corticosterone, the researchers removed the suprachiasmatic nucleus in a number of rats. As expected, this removed the circadian rhythm of the animals.

Among other things, the body temperature and activity level of the rats went from circadian oscillations to a more constant state. The same was true of the otherwise rhythmic hormone production.

However, the circadian rhythm of the cerebellum was restored when the rats were subsequently implanted with a special programmable micropump, normally used to dose medication in specific quantities.

In this case, however, the researchers used the pump to emit carefully metered doses of corticosterone at different times of the day and night, similar to the animals' natural rhythm.

'Nobody has used these pumps for anything like this before. So technically, we were onto something completely new', says Martin Fredensborg Rath.

For that reason, the researchers spent the best part of a year carrying out a large number of control tests to ensure that the new method was valid.

Interaction Between Neurons and Hormones

As mentioned, the new method paid off. With the artificial corticosterone supplement, researchers were again able to read a rhythmic activity of clock genes in the cerebellum of the rats, even though their suprachiasmatic nucleus had been removed.

'This is hugely interesting from a scientific point of view, because it means that we have two systems - the nervous system and the hormonal system - that communicate perfectly and influence one another. All in the course of a reasonably tight 24-hour programme', says Martin Fredensborg Rath.

With the test results and the new method in the toolbox, the researchers' next step is to study other rhythmic hormones in a similar manner, including hormones from the thyroid gland.

[florida80]

7-Nov-2019

New X-ray technology could revolutionize how doctors identify abnormalities


University of Maryland Baltimore County


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Using ground-breaking technology, researchers at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County (UMBC) and University of Baltimore (UMB) are testing a new method of X-ray imaging that uses color to identify microfractures in bones. Microfractures were previously impossible to see using standard X-ray imaging. The findings associated with this advancement in color (spectral) CT (computed tomography) imaging are published in Advanced Functional Materials.

Since the discovery of X-rays in 1895, the basics of the technology have remained consistent. Doctors and scientists use them to see dense materials, like bones, but the technology's capabilities have been limited. Dipanjan Pan, professor of chemical, biochemical and environmental engineering UMBC, and professor of radiology at UMB, is the corresponding author of this new study. Looking ahead to the next generation of X-ray technology, he asks, "How can we detect a bone microcrack, something that is not visible using X-ray imaging?"

Pan explains that to examine this question, his lab developed nanoparticles that navigate and attach specifically to areas where microcracks exist. He likes to call them "GPS particles." They started conducting this research at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. The researchers have programmed the particles to latch onto the correct area of the microcrack. Once the particles attach to microcracks, they remain there, which is crucial to the imaging process.

The particles contain the element hafnium. A new X-ray-based technique developed by a New Zealand-based company MARS then take CT images of the body and the hafnium particles appear in color. This provides a very clear image of where the bone microcracks are located.

Hafnium is used because its composition makes it detectable to X-rays, generating a signal that can then be used to image the cracks. Pan's lab showed that hafnium is stable enough to be used in testing involving living creatures, and can be excreted safely from the body. The lab has not yet begun testing on humans, but the technology to do so may be available as soon as 2020.

As for other applications for spectral CT imaging with this hafnium breakthrough, the research suggests that this methodology could be used to detect much more serious problems. For example, in order to determine whether a person has a blockage in their heart, doctors often will perform a stress test to detect abnormalities, which comes with a significant amount of risk. One day in the near future, doctors may be able to use spectral CT to determine whether there is a blockage in organs.

"Regular CT does not have a soft-tissue contrast. It cannot tell you where your blood vessels are. Spectral CT can help solve that problem," Pan explains. He notes that although more research is needed to begin using spectral CT in this way, he anticipates that it will be a "tremendous" new tool for radiologists. Dr. Fatemeh Ostadhossein, a recent graduate of the Pan lab, was first author on this study.

[florida80]

Nov-2019

Minimizing post-harvest food losses

Research team from Graz, Austria, develops biological methods to improve the shelf life of fruit and vegetables

The crops have been harvested. Now it is important to store the various crops well and to preserve them as long and as carefully as possible. Post-harvest losses due to spoilage, however, represent a significant problem along the supply chain and lead to profit losses in the millions. According to the FAO (Food and Agriculture Organization of the UN) statistics, almost half of the world's harvest (45 percent) of fruits and vegetables are lost on their way to the end consumer. The main causes of these losses are pest or disease infestation and incorrect storage conditions, which lead to rotting or loss of fresh mass due to respiration and evaporation. The only remedy is often the excessive use of chemicals. Researchers from the Institute of Environmental Biotechnology at TU Graz in cooperation with the Austrian Centre of Industrial Biotechnology (acib) and industrial partners have successfully tested ecological methods that improve the storage of apples and sugar beet - representative examples for other types of fruit and vegetables.

Shelf life of apples significantly increased

Hot water treatment (HWT) has proven to be a sustainable method for reducing fungal fruit decay after harvest in a large number of crops. In this treatment, apples are briefly dipped into a hot water bath. This "heat shock" stimulates the apple's natural defence mechanisms, the principle of action has not yet been fully clarified. Nevertheless, there are always outbreaks of pathogens in storage and apples spoil.

In a laboratory experiment, the head of the Institute of Environmental Biotechnology, Gabriele Berg, PhD student Birgit Wassermann and PhD student Peter Kusstatscher, have now successfully tested a method that significantly improves the shelf life of organic apples through the combined use of HWT and biocontrol organisms. Birgit Wassermann explains the experimental setup: "We infected organic apples with two of the most important putrefactive agents, then treated them with hot water and a biocontrol agent designed by us. This combined approach enabled us to either kill the post-harvest pathogens completely or to reduce the infection diameter to a maximum in about 60 percent of the apples treated in this way." Compared to the control group - apples that were only treated with HWT - the combi-method showed 20 percent better results in the resistance of the apples to storage rot. The additive protective effect of the biocontrol agent obtained from the apple microbiome of native organic apples for the control of the storage moulds could be clearly demonstrated. The results of the study were published in the journal Frontiers in Microbiology.

"This combined approach is a sustainable and ecologically sound way to reduce apple blight. On the basis of this method, we can optimize apple storage together with industrial project partners," summarizes Gabriele Berg, head of the institute.

The apple microbiome remains intact

At the same time, Gabriele Berg and her team have investigated for the first time how the hot water treatment affects the microbiome of the apple, i.e. the entirety of all microorganisms. Together with an Austrian organic fruit company, the researchers were able to show in a trial on an industrial scale that the natural microbiome of apples remains unchanged through HWT treatment, whereas harmful fungi are almost completely contained. This proves that HWT leads to the release of certain plant defence metabolites that kill pathogens without affecting the natural apple-associated microbiome. The close connection between the plant and its microbial symbionts is thus confirmed once again. Just a few weeks ago, the same team of researchers at Graz University of Technology, led by Gabriele Berg and Birgit Wassermann, caused a stir with their study on the composition of the apple microbiome. With every apple we eat about 100 million bacteria, but the microbiome of an organic apple differs considerably from that of a conventional apple. Stored apples with rotten spots also contain a fundamentally different microbiome, which consists of 99 percent fungi and only one percent bacteria.

Biological crop protection also effective for sugar beet

Not only apple farmers, but also the sugar beet industry suffers millions in losses every year due to storage rot. In cooperation with the Austrian Centre of Industrial Biotechnology (acib), the research team has also devoted itself to this topic and developed an environmentally friendly crop protection agent together with one of the largest European sugar producers and the Graz start-up Roombiotic. acib researcher Peter Kusstatscher designed his own biocontrol agent for this purpose and tested it under industrial conditions. "The treatment of the beets leads to significantly higher sugar levels after storage," explains Peter Kusstatscher. In addition, a process was developed that shows which beets from which fields are particularly susceptible to storage rot even before the beets are harvested and therefore must be processed quickly. The research results could considerably minimize economic losses in the future, especially since the sugar losses occurring in Germany alone currently cause more than half a million euros of damage per day.

[florida80]

Nov-2019

Heart attack modeled with human stem cells

Toward the development of individual model of ischemic heart disease

Okayama University


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IMAGE: Microscopic picture of cardiomyocytes differentiated from human induced pluripotent stem cells. Green indicates cardiac troponin protein, showing typical striated pattern. Red: actin protein. Blue: cellular nucleus. view more 

Credit: ©2019 Okayama University

Researchers at Okayama University Graduate School of Medicine, Dentistry and Pharmaceutical Sciences developed a model of myocardial infarction using cardiomyocytes differentiated from human induced pluripotent stem cells.

The journal Biochemical and Biophysical Research Communications published the study, with Ken Takahashi, Ph.D., as corresponding author, and Wei Heng, MSc., a graduate student in the Naruse Lab, as first author.

To date, laboratory animals such as mouse have been used to model diseases including myocardial infarction. However, there have been concerns about difference in characteristics of cardiomyocytes e.g. heart rate and action of drugs, based on the difference of gene expression between laboratory animals and human.

Using this model, researchers can evaluate the extent of myocardial tissue damage by microscope morphologically, and by measuring injury-marker proteins and analyzing contractility and its synchroneity from recorded movie quantitatively. Further analysis revealed that gene expression of interleukin-8, an inflammation marker known to increase in acute myocardial infarction, increased in this model.

"This myocardial infarction model will contribute to the development of preventive/therapeutic medicine more effective to human even without sacrificing animals," said Ken Takahashi, Ph.D., assistant professor in the university and lead author of the study

[florida80]

Nov-2019

Mated female mosquitoes are more likely to transmit malaria parasites


PLOS


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IMAGE: Anopheles gambiae view more 

Credit: Jim Gathany-CDC, Flickr (CC-BY)

Female mosquitoes that have mated are more likely to transmit malaria parasites than virgin females, according to a study published November 7 in the open-access journal PLOS Pathogens by Farah Dahalan of Imperial College London, Mara Lawniczak from the Wellcome Sanger Institute, and colleagues. The results of this study imply that efforts to target male mosquitoes might not only suppress mosquito populations, but also act to decrease vector competence among residual females.

Malaria is a mosquito-transmitted disease, caused by the parasite Plasmodium falciparum, that kills more than 400,000 people and infects more than 200 million people worldwide annually. Existing vector control measures rely on continued mosquito susceptibility to various insecticides, but resistance has evolved to all four insecticide classes currently in use, and new vector control strategies, including strategies that target reproduction, are sorely needed. Several species of Anopheles are responsible for the majority of transmission in Africa, where the disease causes the most morbidity. In Anopheles mosquitoes, levels of the hormone 20-hydroxyecdysone (20E) in females can be influenced by two major factors: blood-feeding and mating. In the new study, Dahalan and colleagues investigate the impact of both mating and 20E on female mosquito susceptibility to P. falciparum.

Farah Dahalan says "If male-derived 20E enhances vector competence of mated females in nature, then male mosquitoes may be contributing to malaria transmission in previously unappreciated ways. It is possible that vector control strategies that target males may have additional benefits toward reducing transmission."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Methotrexate reduces joint damage progression over placebo in erosive hand OA


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, methotrexate did not demonstrate superior efficacy over placebo for pain relief and function evolution at three and 12 months in patients with erosive hand osteoarthritis, but did significantly reduce the progression of joint damage over placebo and seems to facilitate bone remodeling in these patients (Abstract #1759 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1759) ).

Osteoarthritis (OA) is a common joint disease that most often affects middle-age to elderly people. OA is a disease of the entire joint, involving the cartilage, joint lining, ligaments, and bone. It is characterized by breakdown of the cartilage (the tissue that cushions the ends of the bones between joints), bony changes of the joints, deterioration of tendons and ligaments, and various degrees of inflammation of the joint lining (called the synovium).

No studies so far have evaluated the effect of methotrexate (MTX), a disease-modifying antirheumatic drug, in hand osteoarthritis. Researchers conducted this one-year prospective, monocentric, randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled study to examine the drug's effect on pain and structural progression in patients with symptomatic erosive hand osteoarthritis.

"Erosive hand OA poses problems in terms of pain, function and disability, but especially given the lack of truly effective therapies. The natural evolution of erosive hand OA is characterized by a succession of erosive phases and remodeling. These rearrangements suggest the involvement of pro-inflammatory cytokine cascades known to cause cartilage degradation and bone resorption," says Prof. Christian Roux, head of the joint unit in the rheumatology department at Cote d'Azur University in France, and the study's lead author. "In recent years, imaging data have confirmed the presence of inflammation in the joints of these patients. The clinical presentation and imaging data bring this entity closer to inflammatory rheumatism, such as rheumatoid arthritis and psoriatic arthritis. These similarities have justified for some the use of treatments used in inflammatory rheumatism."

Sixty-four patients with erosive hand OA in the study were randomized into two groups: taking a dose of 10 mg of MTX per week or a placebo. The study's primary endpoint was pain assessment at three months. Secondary endpoints were clinical features, including pain measured on a Visual Analogue Scale (VAS), radiographic features and magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) at 12 months.

At three months, there was no significant difference in the evolution in VAS pain score between both groups: the MTX group's mean decrease was 17.5 (from 28.4) and the placebo's mean decrease was 8.4 (from 25.2). Erosive joints progressed significantly more to a remodeling phase in the MTX group than the placebo group, or 27 percent to 15 percent. Joints with joint space loss appeared to be eroding less in the MTX group than in the placebo group, or eight percent to 29 percent. Interleukin-6 level and synovitis findings on MRI scans at baseline were found to be predictive factors for erosive structural evolution of non-erosive joints.

According to the study's findings, while MTX did not demonstrate superior efficacy over placebo for improvement of pain and functional evolution at three and 12 months in people with EHOA, it did significantly reduce joint damage progression compared to placebo and seems to facilitate bone remodeling. The presence of systemic and local inflammation at baseline predicted erosive progression.

"The study does not demonstrate superior efficacy of MTX over placebo on pain and function in subjects with erosive hand OA. But probably it will be linked to a multifactorial origin of pain in these subjects such as mechanical or inflammatory pain," says Prof. Roux. "It is possible that we have to treat earlier if we want to have an effect on pain. However, our results show a structural effect of the treatment that facilitates bone remodeling and seems to slow the erosive structural progression of digital osteoarthritis with a seemingly more pronounced effect in patients with early lesions. I think this is a major point. The main complaint for people is the deformity linked to structural evolution in this disease. Our study's results should encourage new studies to be conducted."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

ADA2 is a specific biomarker for MAS in systemic JIA


American College of Rheumatology


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ADA2 is a Sensitive, Specific Biomarker for Life-Threatening Macrophage Activation Syndrome in Systemic JIA

ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, adenosine deaminase 2 (ADA2) in the peripheral blood is a sensitive, specific biomarker for macrophage activation syndrome, a potentially life-threatening complication of systemic juvenile idiopathic arthritis (systemic JIA) (Abstract #920 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=920) ).

About one child in every 1,000 develops some type of chronic arthritis. These disorders can affect children at any age, although rarely in the first six months of life. It is estimated that around 300,000 children in the United States have been diagnosed with the condition.

Macrophage activation syndrome (MAS) is characterized by a vicious cycle of immune cell activation and dysregulated cytokine production that can result in multi-organ failure and is a life-threatening complication in systemic JIA. Clear biomarkers are needed for prompt diagnosis of MAS to initiate treatment and better understand the pathogenesis of the disease. To address this, a group of researchers conducted a study of peripheral blood ADA2 activity levels to determine if it is a useful biomarker for MAS.

"Children with deficiency of ADA2 are known to develop early onset vasculitis and stroke, but the function of ADA2 and how it is regulated is not entirely clear," said Pui Y. Lee, MD, PhD, attending physician at Boston Children's Hospital and one the study's lead authors. "We conducted this observational study to understand whether ADA2 enzyme levels are different in various childhood rheumatologic diseases. To our surprise, the levels were very high in children with systemic JIA complicated by MAS. It is important to find useful biomarkers for MAS, because many of the existing markers are not very effective in distinguishing MAS from systemic inflammation. Early detection of MAS is extremely important, because mortality of the condition remains quite high and treatment should be started as soon as possible."

Researchers established normal levels of peripheral blood ADA2 levels in 175 healthy children and compared these values with 25 children with Kawasaki's disease, 13 with systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE), 13 with juvenile dermatomyositis and 120 with various forms of JIA. While they found mild elevation of ADA2 in some patients with SLE and juvenile dermatomyositis, ADA2 levels that were above the upper limit of normal were largely restricted to children with systemic JIA who had clinically diagnosed MAS.

The study's results show that in children with active systemic JIA, ADA2 activity beyond the upper limit of normal is strong evidence for concomitant MAS.

"Our findings show that ADA2 is a valuable diagnostic marker to distinguish MAS from other forms of systemic inflammation," said Dr. Lee. "While there are many markers currently used for evaluation of MAS, many of them lack specificity unless the cut-off is raised significantly to distinguish MAS from general inflammation. In contrast, elevation of ADA2 levels above the normal limit of healthy individuals has good sensitivity and specificity for diagnosing MAS. This is likely related to the biology of ADA2 as a direct product of activated macrophages. It is our hope that ADA2 testing will be become more available as a clinical test to help diagnose MAS rapidly, which will in turn facilitate treatment initiation and improve patient outcomes

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Children with Down syndrome at increased risk for inflammatory, erosive arthritis


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA --A new study finds that children with Down syndrome are at an increased risk of an associated form of arthritis. Additionally, researchers recommend changing the name to Down syndrome-associated arthritis to more accurately reflect the inflammatory and erosive nature of the condition. Details of this study will be presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting (Abstract #1817 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1817) ).

About one child in every 1,000 develops some type of chronic arthritis. These disorders can affect children at any age, although rarely in the first six months of life. It is estimated that around 300,000 children in the United States have been diagnosed with the condition. Down syndrome is a condition in which a person has an extra chromosome number 21, which affects how the body and brain develop.

Arthropathy of Down syndrome has an increased incidence and prevalence compared to Juvenile Idiopathic Arthritis (JIA). However, the disease is rarely recognized at onset and remains under-diagnosed. Children with arthropathy of Down syndrome often present with significant joint damage and disability at diagnosis. A group of researchers from Ireland conducted a cross-sectional, observational study to identify undiagnosed cases of arthropathy of Down syndrome, document the time to diagnosis among these patients, and describe the clinical, laboratory and radiological features of the condition at diagnosis.

"Given the paucity of information in the literature with regards to arthritis in children with Down syndrome, our initial aims were to identify whether arthritis in Down syndrome is missed leading to a delay in diagnosis, describe the clinical and radiological features of inflammatory arthritis in children with Down syndrome, and estimate the prevalence of inflammatory arthritis in children with Down syndrome," said Charlene M. Foley, MBBS, BSc, PhD, a clinical researcher at the National Centre for Pediatric Rheumatology at Our Lady's Children's Hospital in Crumlin, Ireland, and the study's lead author. "If we know there is increased risk in children with Down syndrome, we are more likely to consider it as a possible diagnosis. Early recognition leads to earlier instigation of appropriate treatment and, therefore, better clinical outcomes and quality of life for a population of children already at risk of a number of co-morbidities that can impact their lives."

Researchers invited children (zero to 21 years old) with Down syndrome to participate in a musculoskeletal screening clinic where they received a detailed examination from a pediatric rheumatologist. A subsequent clinical visit with a different physician confirmed all suspected cases of arthropathy of Down syndrome. Physicians instigated investigations and treatment following normal clinical practice for JIA. The researchers collected data on a convenience sample of 21 newly diagnosed children with JIA to create a comparison group.

Over an 18-month period, 503 children with Down syndrome were screened for arthritis, with 18 new cases diagnosed. In total, the study identified 33 children with arthropathy of Down syndrome, combining cases that predated the study's commencement and those children referred to the center during the study period. The study's results suggest that prevalence of arthropathy Down syndrome is 20 per 1,000 children with Down syndrome.

The researchers also observed significant delays in diagnosis of arthritis in children with Down syndrome. The majority of children presented with polyarticular, RF-negative arthritis, with a predominance of arthritis in the small joints of the hands and wrists. No children with arthropathy of Down syndrome in the study were ANA positive. Erosive changes were reported on X-ray in more children with arthropathy Down syndrome (42 percent) than the JIA group (14 percent). Future research in this patient population may help accurately define disease pathogenesis, identify disease biomarkers and establish best practices for treatment, the researchers concluded. They also suggest that "Down syndrome-associated arthritis" would be a more accurate term than "arthropathy of Down syndrome."

"To our knowledge, this is the first study to consider screening children with Down syndrome for arthritis. Through this simple, non-invasive process we detected a number of undiagnosed cases of Down syndrome associated arthritis (DA)" said Dr. Foley. "We observed a high degree of methotrexate-associated side effects in children with DA. With this knowledge, clinicians may consider altering their treatment choices in favor of biological therapy for this cohort of children. Our study highlighted that the clinical phenotype of the condition is inflammatory and erosive in nature. Our proposal to rename the condition Down syndrome-associated arthritis is to reflect the inflammatory, erosive nature of the disease."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Children with Down syndrome at increased risk for inflammatory, erosive arthritis


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA --A new study finds that children with Down syndrome are at an increased risk of an associated form of arthritis. Additionally, researchers recommend changing the name to Down syndrome-associated arthritis to more accurately reflect the inflammatory and erosive nature of the condition. Details of this study will be presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting (Abstract #1817 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1817) ).

About one child in every 1,000 develops some type of chronic arthritis. These disorders can affect children at any age, although rarely in the first six months of life. It is estimated that around 300,000 children in the United States have been diagnosed with the condition. Down syndrome is a condition in which a person has an extra chromosome number 21, which affects how the body and brain develop.

Arthropathy of Down syndrome has an increased incidence and prevalence compared to Juvenile Idiopathic Arthritis (JIA). However, the disease is rarely recognized at onset and remains under-diagnosed. Children with arthropathy of Down syndrome often present with significant joint damage and disability at diagnosis. A group of researchers from Ireland conducted a cross-sectional, observational study to identify undiagnosed cases of arthropathy of Down syndrome, document the time to diagnosis among these patients, and describe the clinical, laboratory and radiological features of the condition at diagnosis.

"Given the paucity of information in the literature with regards to arthritis in children with Down syndrome, our initial aims were to identify whether arthritis in Down syndrome is missed leading to a delay in diagnosis, describe the clinical and radiological features of inflammatory arthritis in children with Down syndrome, and estimate the prevalence of inflammatory arthritis in children with Down syndrome," said Charlene M. Foley, MBBS, BSc, PhD, a clinical researcher at the National Centre for Pediatric Rheumatology at Our Lady's Children's Hospital in Crumlin, Ireland, and the study's lead author. "If we know there is increased risk in children with Down syndrome, we are more likely to consider it as a possible diagnosis. Early recognition leads to earlier instigation of appropriate treatment and, therefore, better clinical outcomes and quality of life for a population of children already at risk of a number of co-morbidities that can impact their lives."

Researchers invited children (zero to 21 years old) with Down syndrome to participate in a musculoskeletal screening clinic where they received a detailed examination from a pediatric rheumatologist. A subsequent clinical visit with a different physician confirmed all suspected cases of arthropathy of Down syndrome. Physicians instigated investigations and treatment following normal clinical practice for JIA. The researchers collected data on a convenience sample of 21 newly diagnosed children with JIA to create a comparison group.

Over an 18-month period, 503 children with Down syndrome were screened for arthritis, with 18 new cases diagnosed. In total, the study identified 33 children with arthropathy of Down syndrome, combining cases that predated the study's commencement and those children referred to the center during the study period. The study's results suggest that prevalence of arthropathy Down syndrome is 20 per 1,000 children with Down syndrome.

The researchers also observed significant delays in diagnosis of arthritis in children with Down syndrome. The majority of children presented with polyarticular, RF-negative arthritis, with a predominance of arthritis in the small joints of the hands and wrists. No children with arthropathy of Down syndrome in the study were ANA positive. Erosive changes were reported on X-ray in more children with arthropathy Down syndrome (42 percent) than the JIA group (14 percent). Future research in this patient population may help accurately define disease pathogenesis, identify disease biomarkers and establish best practices for treatment, the researchers concluded. They also suggest that "Down syndrome-associated arthritis" would be a more accurate term than "arthropathy of Down syndrome."

"To our knowledge, this is the first study to consider screening children with Down syndrome for arthritis. Through this simple, non-invasive process we detected a number of undiagnosed cases of Down syndrome associated arthritis (DA)" said Dr. Foley. "We observed a high degree of methotrexate-associated side effects in children with DA. With this knowledge, clinicians may consider altering their treatment choices in favor of biological therapy for this cohort of children. Our study highlighted that the clinical phenotype of the condition is inflammatory and erosive in nature. Our proposal to rename the condition Down syndrome-associated arthritis is to reflect the inflammatory, erosive nature of the disease."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Low-dose oral prednisolone substantially improves pain and function in hand OA


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- Research presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting found that a six-week treatment with low-dose oral prednisolone substantially improves pain and decreases signs of inflammation in patients with painful hand osteoarthritis (Abstract #1760).

Osteoarthritis (also known as OA) is a common joint disease that most often affects middle-age to elderly people. It is commonly referred to as "wear and tear" of the joints; it is now known that OA is a disease of the entire joint, involving the cartilage, joint lining, ligaments, and bone. OA is characterized by breakdown of the cartilage, bony changes of the joints, deterioration of tendons and ligaments, and various degrees of inflammation of the joint lining (called the synovium).

While studies have previously shown that synovial inflammation is often present in people with hand OA and is a main determinant of both pain and disease progression, there is still some uncertainty about how to effectively treat it. This randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled trial looked at both efficacy and safety for short-term, low-dose prednisolone used to treat hand OA.

"Hand OA is a common musculoskeletal disease, with a substantial disease-burden in the form of hand pain, functional disability, reduced grip strength and a reduced quality of life. Currently, there is an unmet need for effective therapies for this disease. While several therapeutic options for hand OA are available to alleviate symptoms, the efficacy of these treatments is modest at best," says Féline Kroon, MD, a rheumatologist in training at Leiden University Medical Centre in the Netherlands and the study's lead author. "In this trial, we set out to investigate the efficacy and safety of prednisolone based on observations from previous research that local inflammation seems to play a role in the disease and may be a potential target for treatment."

The trial enrolled patients with signs of synovial inflammation and who met the American College of Rheumatology criteria for painful hand OA. Patients with four or more osteoarthritic nodes involving interphalangeal joints, one or more interphalangeal joint with soft tissue swelling or erythema, and one or more positive power Doppler signal or synovitis of grade two or higher were eligible. Key exclusion criteria for the trial were patients who had chronic inflammatory rheumatic diseases, psoriasis, use of immune-modulating drugs within 90 days before baseline or predominant thumb-based pain.

The researchers randomized eligible patients who had visual analogue scale evidence of finger pain (30 mm or more), and patients who flared upon nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug washout (20 mm or more) to receive either prednisolone 10 mg daily for six weeks or a placebo. This was followed by a two-week prednisolone taper, then six weeks without study medications. Outcomes were assessed at two, four, six, eight and 14 weeks.

The trial's primary endpoint was visual analogue scale finger pain at week six in intention-to-treat analysis. The secondary clinical endpoints included fulfillment of the Osteoarthritis Research Society International (OARSI) responder criteria, Australian/Canadian Hand OA Index (AUSCAN) pain and function, Functional Index for Hand OA (FIHOA), visual analogue scale patient global assessment, the Medical Outcomes Study's Short-Form 36 and grip strength. Imaging endpoints for the trial included both ultrasound evidence of synovitis and positive power Doppler signal. Ninety-two people were enrolled in the trial. The average age was 63 years, and 79 percent of the participants were women. The enrolled group were split evenly with half receiving prednisolone and the other half receiving placebo. In each of these two groups, 42 completed the trial. At week six, 33 patients in the prednisolone group and 15 in the placebo group fulfilled the OARSI responder criteria, and prednisolone was superior to placebo in most other secondary clinical endpoints. Additionally, ultrasound synovitis significantly improved at week six in the prednisolone group and there was no difference in the power Doppler signal. After drug tapering, between-group differences disappeared. Adverse events were mostly mild for patients in the study, and they were comparable between the two groups.

"Substantial improvements in pain and function, exceeding effects of currently available therapies, were seen in the trial. Therefore, a short course of 10 mg of prednisolone could be considered a new treatment option for people suffering with hand OA, especially those who experience a flare," says Dr. Kroon. "However, it is important to realize that patients included in this study had pain and signs of inflammation and experienced a flare after withdrawal of pain medication, and therefore, these results only pertain to this group of patients. Future studies to investigate the optimal dosage and duration of treatment are warranted."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Limited access to SLE lab tests in developing nations affects usefulness


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented this week at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, supportive laboratory assays to diagnose lupus, specifically the antinuclear antibody (ANA) test, are less often offered in developing nations due to a relative lack of resources. This greatly reduced the diagnostic utility of ANA as an entry criterion for lupus classification in Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts compared to African American cohorts in the United States. This emphasizes an urgent need for broader clinical trials and ANA testing to participants in developing countries (Abstract #705 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=705) ).

Systemic lupus erythematosus, referred to as SLE or lupus, is a chronic (long-term) disease that causes systemic inflammation which affects multiple organs and can be deadly. In addition to affecting the skin and joints, it can affect other organs in the body such as the kidneys, brain, the tissue lining the lungs (pleura) and/or heart (pericardium). Many patients experience fatigue, weight loss, and fever.

Diagnostic criteria for SLE are important to generate reliable epidemiologic data. Prevalence of SLE in West Africa is falsely low because of barriers to accurate diagnostic testing, including lack of resources and the labor-intensive nature of these tests. The newly developed 2019 ACR/EULAR SLE classification criteria tool may improve diagnostic sensitivity and specificity compared to the previously established ACR and SLICC criteria. This new study investigated the performance of each set of criteria in two West African lupus cohorts from Korle bu Teaching Hospital in Ghana and Lagos University Teaching Hospital in Nigeria and compared it to an African American cohort at New York University/Langone Medical Center in New York City.

"African SLE patients throughout the diaspora are undertreated and understudied. This is in part due to the tendency for these individuals to hail from resource-limited areas of the world. In vetting diagnostic criteria, it is important to consider how more sophisticated testing may exacerbate existing disparities in diagnosis, treatment, and research," says Ashira D. Blazer, MD, MSCI, assistant professor of medicine, Division of Rheumatology, at New York University Langone Medical Center and the study's lead author. "Lack of widely available testing for ANA, the entry criterion to classify SLE using the 2019 ACR/EULAR classification criteria, throughout sub-Saharan Africa could impact SLE clinical care and slow down research", she adds. "We aimed to test the diagnostic efficiencies of each criteria in the USA compared to two low- or middle-income countries."

The researchers collected data on 355 patients with SLE for the study, including 151 African American patients in the United States, 110 patients in Ghana and 94 patients in Nigeria. All were diagnosed with lupus by expert clinicians. They gathered clinical information including demographics, SLE criteria, SLEDAI scores, SLICC damage indexes, vital signs and laboratory values that were available at the initial patient encounter. Longitudinal data was collected, at six-month intervals, over the course of at least one year during routine clinical visits. When necessary, the researchers also retrospectively reviewed clinical charts. They calculated the proportion of patients in each of the three cohorts who met each of the systems for classifying patients with lupus: (1) ACR, (2) SLICC and the (3) 2019 ACR/EULAR Classification Criteria for SLE.

The African American cohort's demographics included an average age of 43 years, 90 percent were women, mean SLE disease duration of 14.3 years; and 96 percent met the ACR criteria, 96 percent met the SLICC criteria and 95 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria. In the Ghanaian cohort, the average age was 32 years, all were women, the mean SLE disease duration was 2.2 years; and 85 percent met the ACR criteria, 84 percent met the SLICC criteria and 62 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria. In the Nigerian cohort, the average age was 35, 97 percent were women, the mean SLE disease duration was 4.4 years, and 90 percent met the ACR criteria, 87 percent met the SLICC criteria and 61 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria.

Researchers found discrepancies in the data due largely to missing laboratory data, particularly immunologic and hematologic studies. While none of the African-American cohort were missing ANA test results, 26 percent of the Ghanaian cohort and 33 percent of the Nigerian cohort were missing ANA results. Compared to both the Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts, the African-American cohort was more likely to meet ACR, SLICC and ACR/EULAR criteria. While the ANA entry criterion greatly diminished the diagnostic utility of the ACR/EULAR classification criteria in both the Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts, the criteria's weighted point system performed better than either the ACR or SLICC criteria, with 96 percent of the African-American, 92 percent of the Ghanaian and 95 percent of the Nigerian cohorts earning a sufficient number of diagnostic points.

"The new clinical indices provided better diagnostic efficiency in the developing world than either the ACR or SLICC criteria. These findings were enlightening, and they solidified an important concept: that SLE is a clinical diagnosis first," says Dr. Blazer. "While research partnerships across the international economic divides might provide ANA testing, it is imperative that no new barriers be created for regional investigators who might struggle to disseminate data lacking the international community's required laboratory results."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Low-dose oral prednisolone substantially improves pain and function in hand OA


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- Research presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting found that a six-week treatment with low-dose oral prednisolone substantially improves pain and decreases signs of inflammation in patients with painful hand osteoarthritis (Abstract #1760).

Osteoarthritis (also known as OA) is a common joint disease that most often affects middle-age to elderly people. It is commonly referred to as "wear and tear" of the joints; it is now known that OA is a disease of the entire joint, involving the cartilage, joint lining, ligaments, and bone. OA is characterized by breakdown of the cartilage, bony changes of the joints, deterioration of tendons and ligaments, and various degrees of inflammation of the joint lining (called the synovium).

While studies have previously shown that synovial inflammation is often present in people with hand OA and is a main determinant of both pain and disease progression, there is still some uncertainty about how to effectively treat it. This randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled trial looked at both efficacy and safety for short-term, low-dose prednisolone used to treat hand OA.

"Hand OA is a common musculoskeletal disease, with a substantial disease-burden in the form of hand pain, functional disability, reduced grip strength and a reduced quality of life. Currently, there is an unmet need for effective therapies for this disease. While several therapeutic options for hand OA are available to alleviate symptoms, the efficacy of these treatments is modest at best," says Féline Kroon, MD, a rheumatologist in training at Leiden University Medical Centre in the Netherlands and the study's lead author. "In this trial, we set out to investigate the efficacy and safety of prednisolone based on observations from previous research that local inflammation seems to play a role in the disease and may be a potential target for treatment."

The trial enrolled patients with signs of synovial inflammation and who met the American College of Rheumatology criteria for painful hand OA. Patients with four or more osteoarthritic nodes involving interphalangeal joints, one or more interphalangeal joint with soft tissue swelling or erythema, and one or more positive power Doppler signal or synovitis of grade two or higher were eligible. Key exclusion criteria for the trial were patients who had chronic inflammatory rheumatic diseases, psoriasis, use of immune-modulating drugs within 90 days before baseline or predominant thumb-based pain.

The researchers randomized eligible patients who had visual analogue scale evidence of finger pain (30 mm or more), and patients who flared upon nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug washout (20 mm or more) to receive either prednisolone 10 mg daily for six weeks or a placebo. This was followed by a two-week prednisolone taper, then six weeks without study medications. Outcomes were assessed at two, four, six, eight and 14 weeks.

The trial's primary endpoint was visual analogue scale finger pain at week six in intention-to-treat analysis. The secondary clinical endpoints included fulfillment of the Osteoarthritis Research Society International (OARSI) responder criteria, Australian/Canadian Hand OA Index (AUSCAN) pain and function, Functional Index for Hand OA (FIHOA), visual analogue scale patient global assessment, the Medical Outcomes Study's Short-Form 36 and grip strength. Imaging endpoints for the trial included both ultrasound evidence of synovitis and positive power Doppler signal. Ninety-two people were enrolled in the trial. The average age was 63 years, and 79 percent of the participants were women. The enrolled group were split evenly with half receiving prednisolone and the other half receiving placebo. In each of these two groups, 42 completed the trial. At week six, 33 patients in the prednisolone group and 15 in the placebo group fulfilled the OARSI responder criteria, and prednisolone was superior to placebo in most other secondary clinical endpoints. Additionally, ultrasound synovitis significantly improved at week six in the prednisolone group and there was no difference in the power Doppler signal. After drug tapering, between-group differences disappeared. Adverse events were mostly mild for patients in the study, and they were comparable between the two groups.

"Substantial improvements in pain and function, exceeding effects of currently available therapies, were seen in the trial. Therefore, a short course of 10 mg of prednisolone could be considered a new treatment option for people suffering with hand OA, especially those who experience a flare," says Dr. Kroon. "However, it is important to realize that patients included in this study had pain and signs of inflammation and experienced a flare after withdrawal of pain medication, and therefore, these results only pertain to this group of patients. Future studies to investigate the optimal dosage and duration of treatment are warranted

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Limited access to SLE lab tests in developing nations affects usefulness


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented this week at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, supportive laboratory assays to diagnose lupus, specifically the antinuclear antibody (ANA) test, are less often offered in developing nations due to a relative lack of resources. This greatly reduced the diagnostic utility of ANA as an entry criterion for lupus classification in Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts compared to African American cohorts in the United States. This emphasizes an urgent need for broader clinical trials and ANA testing to participants in developing countries (Abstract #705 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=705) ).

Systemic lupus erythematosus, referred to as SLE or lupus, is a chronic (long-term) disease that causes systemic inflammation which affects multiple organs and can be deadly. In addition to affecting the skin and joints, it can affect other organs in the body such as the kidneys, brain, the tissue lining the lungs (pleura) and/or heart (pericardium). Many patients experience fatigue, weight loss, and fever.

Diagnostic criteria for SLE are important to generate reliable epidemiologic data. Prevalence of SLE in West Africa is falsely low because of barriers to accurate diagnostic testing, including lack of resources and the labor-intensive nature of these tests. The newly developed 2019 ACR/EULAR SLE classification criteria tool may improve diagnostic sensitivity and specificity compared to the previously established ACR and SLICC criteria. This new study investigated the performance of each set of criteria in two West African lupus cohorts from Korle bu Teaching Hospital in Ghana and Lagos University Teaching Hospital in Nigeria and compared it to an African American cohort at New York University/Langone Medical Center in New York City.

"African SLE patients throughout the diaspora are undertreated and understudied. This is in part due to the tendency for these individuals to hail from resource-limited areas of the world. In vetting diagnostic criteria, it is important to consider how more sophisticated testing may exacerbate existing disparities in diagnosis, treatment, and research," says Ashira D. Blazer, MD, MSCI, assistant professor of medicine, Division of Rheumatology, at New York University Langone Medical Center and the study's lead author. "Lack of widely available testing for ANA, the entry criterion to classify SLE using the 2019 ACR/EULAR classification criteria, throughout sub-Saharan Africa could impact SLE clinical care and slow down research", she adds. "We aimed to test the diagnostic efficiencies of each criteria in the USA compared to two low- or middle-income countries."

The researchers collected data on 355 patients with SLE for the study, including 151 African American patients in the United States, 110 patients in Ghana and 94 patients in Nigeria. All were diagnosed with lupus by expert clinicians. They gathered clinical information including demographics, SLE criteria, SLEDAI scores, SLICC damage indexes, vital signs and laboratory values that were available at the initial patient encounter. Longitudinal data was collected, at six-month intervals, over the course of at least one year during routine clinical visits. When necessary, the researchers also retrospectively reviewed clinical charts. They calculated the proportion of patients in each of the three cohorts who met each of the systems for classifying patients with lupus: (1) ACR, (2) SLICC and the (3) 2019 ACR/EULAR Classification Criteria for SLE.

The African American cohort's demographics included an average age of 43 years, 90 percent were women, mean SLE disease duration of 14.3 years; and 96 percent met the ACR criteria, 96 percent met the SLICC criteria and 95 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria. In the Ghanaian cohort, the average age was 32 years, all were women, the mean SLE disease duration was 2.2 years; and 85 percent met the ACR criteria, 84 percent met the SLICC criteria and 62 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria. In the Nigerian cohort, the average age was 35, 97 percent were women, the mean SLE disease duration was 4.4 years, and 90 percent met the ACR criteria, 87 percent met the SLICC criteria and 61 percent met the ACR/EULAR criteria.

Researchers found discrepancies in the data due largely to missing laboratory data, particularly immunologic and hematologic studies. While none of the African-American cohort were missing ANA test results, 26 percent of the Ghanaian cohort and 33 percent of the Nigerian cohort were missing ANA results. Compared to both the Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts, the African-American cohort was more likely to meet ACR, SLICC and ACR/EULAR criteria. While the ANA entry criterion greatly diminished the diagnostic utility of the ACR/EULAR classification criteria in both the Ghanaian and Nigerian cohorts, the criteria's weighted point system performed better than either the ACR or SLICC criteria, with 96 percent of the African-American, 92 percent of the Ghanaian and 95 percent of the Nigerian cohorts earning a sufficient number of diagnostic points.

"The new clinical indices provided better diagnostic efficiency in the developing world than either the ACR or SLICC criteria. These findings were enlightening, and they solidified an important concept: that SLE is a clinical diagnosis first," says Dr. Blazer. "While research partnerships across the international economic divides might provide ANA testing, it is imperative that no new barriers be created for regional investigators who might struggle to disseminate data lacking the international community's required laboratory results."

[florida80]

9-Nov-2019

Additional medications to treat children with JIA are urgently needed


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA -- According to new research findings presented this week at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting, there is a profound ongoing need for additional medications to control the signs and symptoms of juvenile idiopathic arthritis (JIA), despite the availability of several approved biologic disease-modifying antirheumatic drugs (biologics) (Abstract #1813 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1813) ).

There are several biologics used for JIA treatment in the United States including etanercept, adalimumab, abatacept, tocilizumab and canakinumab. Nevertheless, many children with JIA continue to have active arthritis despite the available medications and are treated with other medications off-label. Medications that have been proven to be safe and effective in adults with chronic inflammatory arthritis are not being universally studied in children with JIA. This study's goal was to document the continuing medical need for additional, newly approved medications to treat children with JIA.

"The approved treatment options for JIA have expanded tremendously, but there are still significant proportions of children who do not respond to available therapies or who are receiving medications that have not been approved for JIA. We must demand that newly developed medications are studied for safety and effectiveness in children," says Timothy Beukelman, MD, MSCE, associate professor, Division of Pediatric Rheumatology, at the University of Alabama at Birmingham, and the study's co-author.

For the study, the researchers reviewed electronic medical record data for 1,599 JIA patients treated at Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center (CCHMC) since 2008 for medication use and disease activity over time. In addition, they assessed 7,379 JIA patients enrolled in the Childhood Arthritis and Rheumatology Research Alliance (CARRA) registry for medication use and disease activity at their most recent registry visit. The researchers defined ongoing medication need as active JIA despite sequential use of two or more biologics. They defined active JIA as either physician global assessment of JIA activity (on a scale of zero to 10 with zero as inactive disease) of three or higher, or three or more active joints, or a patient global assessment score (on a scale of zero to 10 with zero meaning very well) of three or higher. They only assessed medication failure for patients with complete data.

Use of biologics was common in both data sources (53 percent in CCHMC; 65 percent in CARRA registry), and ongoing medication need was assessed in 487 CCHMC patients and 1,159 CARRA patients. Approximately 52 percent of CCHMC patients and 45 percent of CARRA patients had ongoing active JIA despite treatment with two or more biologics. Among all patients who received any biologic treatments, there was frequent use of medications that are not approved for JIA (37 percent CCHMC patients and 24 percent CARRA patients).

"There is clearly a need to increase the number and types of therapies available for the treatment of children with JIA. Only if FDA demands studies from the pharmaceutical companies as part of their drug development program, will pediatric rheumatologists have valid information about the proper dosing, efficacy and preliminary safety of new medications. Further, FDA approval greatly increases access of JIA patients to new medications," says Hermine I. Brunner, MD, MSc, MBA, chief of rheumatology and director Lupus Center at Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center, and scientific director of the Pediatric Rheumatology Collaborative Study Group (PRCSG) and the study's lead- author.

[florida80]

-Nov-2019

SLE Medicaid patients have higher 30-day death rate compared to those with diabetes


American College of Rheumatology


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ATLANTA --New research found that the 30-day death rate for Medicaid patients with systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE) who underwent coronary revascularization procedures for cardiovascular disease was double that of patients with diabetes mellitus who underwent the same procedures. This study will be presented at the 2019 ACR/ARP Annual Meeting (Abstract # 897).

Systemic lupus erythematosus, referred to as SLE or lupus, is a chronic (long-term) disease that causes systemic inflammation which affects multiple organs and can be deadly. In addition to affecting the skin and joints, it can affect other organs in the body such as the kidneys, brain, the tissue lining the lungs (pleura) and/or heart (pericardium). Many patients experience fatigue, weight loss, and fever.

This research group previously found that although there were similar myocardial infarction risks in patients with SLE or diabetes mellitus (DM), for unknown reasons the rates of coronary revascularization procedures among SLE patients enrolled in Medicaid were 18 percent higher than age- and sex-matched diabetes patients. Although DM patients are known to have an elevated absolute risk of death after coronary revascularization procedures, little is known about mortality after these heart procedures in lupus patients. The researchers conducted a study to determine the outcomes in SLE patients compared to patients with DM as well as patients in the general population. Patients in each cohort were enrolled in Medicaid.

The researchers used Medicaid Analytic eXtract data containing billing claims from the 29 most populated states in the United States from 2007 to 2010. They identified adults 18 to 65 years old with prevalent SLE or DM based on the ninth edition of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-9) codes. They also included patients without SLE or DM for the general population cohort.

Researchers identified coronary revascularization procedures among 608 SLE patients, 1,185 DM patients and 628 general population patients. Each group had a similar follow-up period of approximately two years (1.7). SLE patients had the highest 30-day post-revascularization mortality rate (351.35) per 1,000 person years of observation compared to 210.4 in the DM group and 189.9 in the general population. The analysis showed that lupus patients had double the odds of death within 30 days after a coronary revascularization compared to patients with DM. They also found a similar, but non-significant trend for SLE patients compared to the general population, although this was limited by very few deaths in the general population group.

"The results suggest that Medicaid SLE patients undergoing coronary revascularization procedures had an increased risk of death compared to similar diabetes mellitus patients having the same procedures. This may be due to severity of cardiovascular disease and overall health status in SLE patients selected for these procedures," said Medha Barbhaiya, MD, a rheumatologist and clinical researcher the Hospital for Special Surgery and the study's lead author. "Future studies accounting for the complexity and indications of the procedures performed, SLE and cardiac disease severity, and investigating causes of post-procedure deaths are required. Given the small number of deaths observed, this study needs to be replicated in a larger cohort."

Although based on a small number of post-procedural deaths, this study found that the SLE patients had 1.7 times higher 30-day mortality rates post-coronary revascularization compared to DM and general population patients, despite being comparatively much younger on average.

###

[florida80]

My Favorite Pharmacy Stories

2016-02-19 02:18:54




No matter what job you hold in pharmacy, you’re likely to run into some funny situations.

Recently, I was reminiscing about my time as a pharmacy intern and student on PharmD rotations. Here are some of my favorite stories.

Price Check
As an intern at a retail pharmacy chain, I often spent time price matching prescription drugs at other stores.

One time, a customer brought in more than 10 prescriptions and asked me to price match every possible competitor for each drug. I think it took me about 90 minutes to make all the calls.

I was checking the customer out at the register when he suddenly flew into a rage. He angrily shouted, “This is 25 cents more than last time!”

I interrupted the man’s rant with, “Are you really going to hassle me over 25 cents?” I then reached into my pocket and handed the man a quarter.

We never saw him again.

Itchy Leg Aid
Another time as an intern, a man asked me to help him pick out some cream for an itchy insect bite.

We were in the OTC aisle looking at hydrocortisone cream when he rolled up his pant leg and revealed a red, swollen leg with red streaking in the vein from his ankle all the way up past where I could see. The patient obviously had an advanced case of cellulitis.

I told him, “There’s no OTC cream that can fix that,” and then I quickly walked him out of the pharmacy, pointed to an urgent care center across the street, and said, “If you want to keep that leg, you’ll go seek medical treatment right now.”

Thankfully, he took my advice.

Inappropriate Exam
As a Pharm D student, I spent a month working with an internal medicine physician. This physician believed that students should be actively involved, so I ended up participating in patient care rather than observing it.

One day, a patient came in with classic symptoms of benign prostatic hyperplasia. Without warning or asking me to leave the room, the physician had the patient drop his pants for a digital rectal examination.

After the test was completed, the physician asked if I would like to feel the enlarged prostate. I quickly declined, saying, “If you go to a pharmacy that does that, you're in the wrong pharmacy.” It was the only time I ever saw the physician laugh.

Jailhouse Script
Here’s a bonus story courtesy of my wife, who is also a pharmacist.

As an intern, my wife was working at a retail store when a man pulled up to the drive-thru window. He presented a script for Percocet and said, “I need this in a hurry because I’m on my way to jail.”

The pharmacist overheard him and said, “I don’t think they’re going to let you take those pills with you to jail!”

[florida80]

5 Popular Pharmacy Stories to Catch Up On

2016-07-22 03:56:00

Pharmacy Times Staff



Don’t accidentally overlook these trending pharmacy stories!

5. Does Insulin Syringe Needle Length Matter?
When it comes to diabetes therapy, insulin is pharmacists’ most valuable weapon. Although oral therapies can offer convenience and reduce hypoglycemia risk, the glucose-lowering effects of insulin remain unrivaled.

Unfortunately, patients may resist starting insulin for many reasons, one of which is a fear of needles. Injecting insulin can be painful, especially when using longer needles. Painful injections are not only unpleasant for patients, but can also lead to medication noncompliance and poorer health outcomes.

Although longer needles are often prescribed for patients with increased body fat, this practice actually has no clinical basis. Insulin is meant to be injected into subcutaneous tissue; human skin is only 1.6 mm to 2.4 mm thick, on average. Because skin thickness doesn’t increase significantly in overweight and obese patients, a 4-mm needle is sufficient to deliver insulin to subcutaneous tissue in patients of all sizes.

Furthermore, choosing longer needles can negatively impact therapy in thinner patients. If patients inject insulin intramuscularly because their needle is too long, the drug’s absorption will be accelerated, while it’s duration of action will be shortened.

4. Cystic Fibrosis Patients Could Soon Take a Deep Breath of Ibuprofen
For patients with cystic fibrosis (CF), ibuprofen can help slow down lung function decline. The only problem is that consistent, high-dose ibuprofen use can lead to gastrointestinal bleeding, as well as kidney injury if taken with nephrotoxic intravenous antibiotics, which are commonly taken among CF patients.

The solution to this problem could be breathable ibuprofen.

The idea for developing inhaled ibuprofen originally came from Michael Konstan, MD, the pediatric department chair at Case Western University School of Medicine, who showed that patients with CF who received oral, high-dose ibuprofen (20 mg/kg, or 6 of the 200-mg tablets for a 60-kg person) were able to retain lung function and needed fewer courses of antibiotics. He also found that rats who took high-dose ibuprofen slowed the influx of the neutrophil into the lung, which provided an anti-inflammatory effect.

Carolyn L. Cannon, MD, PhD, associate professor of microbial pathogenesis and immunology at Texas A&M Health Science Center, is working in the preclinical phase of some nanoparticle formulations of this proposed therapy. She explained that Dr. Konstan’s Cystic Fibrosis Care Center at Rainbow Babies and Children’s Hospital still provides high-dose ibuprofen as a treatment option, but few other places do so because of potential adverse effects.

3. Common Medications Can Trigger Heart Failure
The American Heart Association (AHA) has released a scientific statement cautioning against the use of some common drugs and supplements in patients with heart failure (HF).

The statement published this month in Circulation said certain medications can cause heart-related problems by:

• Being toxic to heart muscle cells or changing how the heart muscle contracts.
• Interacting with HF medications, which means some of their benefits are lost.
• Containing more sodium than advised for patients with HF.

For example, commonly used nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, such as ibuprofen, can trigger or worsen HF by causing sodium and fluid retention and rendering diuretic medications less effective. Meanwhile, OTC heartburn medications and cold treatments may also contain significant amounts of sodium, which is normally restricted in patients with HF.

The AHA advised that many supplements can be dangerous for HF patients, including products containing ephedra, which is known to increase blood pressure, and others that interfere with one or more commonly used HF medications, such as St. John’s wort, ginseng, hawthorn, danshen, and green tea.

2. Pharmacist Reprimanded for Poor Professional Practice
The Pharmaceutical Society of Ireland is censuring a pharmacist for poor professional performance. Pharmacist Jeremiah Blake, owner of Blake’s Pharmacy, will be “mentored” for a year by a superintendent pharmacist, and he will have to meet with that mentor at least 3 times during the 12-month period.

The Pharmaceutical Society of Ireland council found that Blake had poorly maintained a controlled drug register, prescription register, and pharmacy records, including records of medications dispensed. Blake was also rebuked for the lack of appropriate storage of human and veterinary medicinal products. For example, out-of-date products were not segregated from other items and were also not removed for disposal or destruction.

Medications that needed to be kept in cool temperatures were also not stored properly in the fridge. In addition, Blake did not keep medications stored in a clean or appropriate environment. The pharmacist also did not ensure that standard operating procedures were followed, and he did not provide a patient consultation area.

The pharmacist mentor will file reports on Blake’s solutions to these problems, and then the council will review all the reports at the end of the year to ensure that his behavior is satisfactory. If any of the reports do not satisfy the council, then Blake will continue to be monitored until the council is appeased.


1. 3 Federal Regulatory Changes Affecting Pharmacy
In recent years, federal agencies have introduced significant regulatory proposals impacting different facets of the pharmaceutical industry, from drug manufacturing, to reimbursement, to disposal.

Here are 3 major proposals handed down from federal agencies that pharmacists should know:
1. CMS Final Rule on Outpatient Drug Reimbursement
2. FDA Draft Compounding Guidance
3. EPA Proposed Rule on Hazardous Waste Pharmaceuticals

[florida80]

We’re In Our Thirties And That’s When His Attitude Is Stuck

Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Germany, Great Stuff, Pharmacy | Right | October 28, 2019


(I work at a pharmacy. My coworkers and I are female, all in our thirties. One day, an old man walks in. He carries a dirty bag. He has a pair of trousers in there, which he grabs and puts on the counter.)

Old Man: “Please fix it. The zipper is broken.”

Coworker: “Sir, you’re at a pharmacy.”

Old Man: “So?”

Coworker: “We sell prescriptions. We don’t fix clothes here.”

Old Man: *angry now* “But you all are young women in here! You have to be able to fix my pants!”

[florida80]

All Of The Above

Extra Stupid, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | October 23, 2019


(One of my medications is delivered to my home through a specialty pharmacy. Every month they call to verify my information and see if anything has changed. At the end of our conversation, the Home Delivery Pharmacist — HDP — reverifies my medical history before finalizing the order.)

Home Delivery Pharmacist: “Okay… I see here this is from [Hospital Doctor]. Did you see him recently?”

Me: “Yes, while I was in-patient at [Hospital] last month.”

Home Delivery Pharmacist: “Okay. Have you been to the ER, had an infection, or been hospitalized in the last 90 days?”

Me: “Yes, all three.”

Home Delivery Pharmacist: “Which one?”

Me: “All of them.”

Home Delivery Pharmacist: “No. ER, infection, or hospital. Which one?”

Me: “Um… all of the above. All three.”

Home Delivery Pharmacist: *annoyed* “No, ma’am. Were you in the ER, did you have an infection, or were you hospitalized in the last 90 days?”

Me: “Yes! I went to the ER because I couldn’t breathe. I found out I had a lung infection and I was hospitalized for 21 days.”

Home Delivery Pharmacist: “Oh.” *sour tone* “You could have just said yes. We’ll ship this tomorrow.” *hangs up*

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #172114 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=172114)

Columbus, Ohio, Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | October 22, 2019


(Note: I’m the bad customer here)

Recently, I got sick with a very bad cold that among other things, caused me to lose my voice for an extended period. My mother then proceeded to catch this cold, along with a pneumonia, and had to be hospitalized in the ICU with a tube down her throat. My dad has been by her side the whole time and left his phone charger at home, so I go out to get him a new one. It’s Halloween when this happens, which happens to be my mother’s favorite holiday, and I’m very aware of her condition on her favorite day of the year, so I’m not in the best of moods. I eventually find a CVS and buy a phone charger, in the process ruining the night of the cashier.

Me: (hands cashier items)

Cashier: “How are you tonight?”

Me: *Raspy and irritable* “Not great”

Cashier: “Is it because everyone else is ‘too cool for school’?”

(Note: We’re right next to a major university on Halloween, he probably thought I was having a bad night for more normal reasons.)

Me: ” No, it’s because my mother is intubated in the ICU.”

Cashier: (says something about how the ICU here is very good, but is clearly not expecting my response)

(That was a bad night for me, and as I walked out, I felt really bad about ruining that guy’s night as well. If you’re reading this, I’m sorry.)

[florida80]

Mosquitoes Are Satan’s Creation

Ohio, Pharmacy, Religion, Silly, USA | Right | October 16, 2019


(A man is buying some insect repellent.)

Me: “Did you find everything okay?”

Customer: “Yeah, thankfully. Listen, I’m a good Christian and I know God wants us to love our neighbor and forgive others of their sins, but… f*** mosquitoes. Seriously.”

Me: “…” *hands him a receipt* “Have a nice day, sir.”

Customer: *suddenly smiling* “You, too!”

[florida80]

He Has A Very Descriptive Past

Australia, Bad Behavior, Employees, New South Wales, Pharmacy, Sydney | Working | October 14, 2019


(My dad is regaling me with stories on a drive. As we go past a chemist:)

Dad: “That was the chemist that used to provide your grandfather with the drugs that kept him alive for ten extra years. The main pharmacist sold the place to someone else and when the new people opened up the computer records they found all sorts of horrible comments attached to people’s files: ‘Ugly, old b****,’ ‘Impotent pin-d**k,’ ‘Nice tits on her,’ etc.”

(Fast forward ten years and I am handing in a prescription at a chemist on the other side of the city. The pharmacist looks at my name on the script and says:)

Pharmacist: “Oh, [My Uncommon Surname]! Did you have a grandfather that lived in [Town of the first chemist]?”

Me: “Yes, I did.”

Pharmacist: “I used to own the chemist there and saw your grandfather often. I sold that place and moved here about ten years ago.”

Me: “Oh, really, how about that…” *smiles and nods, pulls my cardigan closed, backs slowly out of the place, and makes a mental note not to go back there*

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #169589 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=169589)

Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | October 13, 2019


A vaguely semi-regular patient without insurance filled a few prescriptions, picked them up, etc. This is a rough approximation of the call I later received from the patient’s spouse, edited to maintain patient privacy.
Caller: My spouse, xxx, filled medicine xxx at your pharmacy. You do price matches, right?
Me: Sir/Ma’am, your spouse already picked up the medicine earlier in the day. Price matches are something that are done when filling the medicine, not after the fact.
Caller: But I called [competitor] beforehand, and their price was xxx, that’s xxx less! I told them to tell you to price match! (Clearly, the spouse didn’t listen, because the words “price match” had never crossed their lips. Also, I find it very presumptuous that they said to tell me to price match without even knowing whether we do so in he first place, as opposed to saying to ask me to call the competitor for a price match.)
Me: They did not mention price matching at any point during the filling, and as I said before, I cannot retroactively price match. It isn’t even possible in my computer system.
Caller: But that’s a lot of money, and we’re regulars and fill things at your pharmacy all the time! They only picked it up like five minutes ago! (It was about 25% less. Also, I’d made the prices extremely clear at the time of drop off, providing ample opportunity for the prescription to be taken elsewhere or a price match to be asked for. And to top it off, the prescription had actually been picked up almost an hour before.)
Me: Unfortunately, there isn’t any way for me to price match something that is already picked up, it’s not physically possible in the system in the first place.
Caller: …
After about fifteen seconds of silence from the other end of the line during which I asked multiple times if the caller was still there, the line disconnected abruptly.



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[florida80]

Finally Registers The Reason Why

At The Checkout, California, Health & Body, Pharmacy, Rude & Risque, San Diego, USA | Right | October 7, 2019


(I am stocking shelves at a pharmacy. An elderly gentleman, at least in his 70s, walks up to me and looks at my nametag.)

Customer: “Mister [My Name], yes, I was wondering if you could open up a register for me?”

(I look at the cashier stands. Two are operating, and the lines are not busy at all.)

Me: “The wait shouldn’t be very long. Is there a problem?”

Customer: “I really just need you to open a register for me, please.”

Me: *very confused* “I assure you, the ladies running the registers right now are competent and will have you out the door in no time.”

Customer: “That’s just it. They are ladies…”

(He turns to me and exposes the large box of condoms he has secreted in his jacket.)

Customer: “I wouldn’t be so brazen!”

Me: “Right this way, sir.”

[florida80]

Lunch Is Dangerous To Your Health

Arkansas, Crazy Requests, Jerk, Pharmacy, USA | Right | September 25, 2019


(At my pharmacy, we have only one pharmacist on the weekends. Because of that, we have to close for a half-hour on the weekends due to labor laws so that our pharmacist can get a lunch. We close at the same time every weekend to avoid confusion with regular customers. At exactly two minutes to lunch, a man comes rushing up to the pharmacy.)

Husband: “I just got out of the emergency room. My doctor told me I need all of these right away, especially the pain medication.”

(He proceeds to hand me about five new prescriptions.)

Me: “I apologize, sir, we are about to close for our scheduled lunch, but we would be happy to fill it for you in thirty minutes when we get back.”

Husband: “I can’t wait! We’re traveling to Texas and I need my medicine!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but if we don’t leave right now, our systems will shut us out. We are required to take a lunch at this time.”

(He takes his prescriptions and stomps away. As we are getting ready to close everything up, his wife comes over.)

Irate Wife: “Why won’t you fill his medication?!”

Me: “Ma’am, we will be happy to fill his prescription as soon as we get back from lunch.”

Irate Wife: “This is ridiculous. Where else am I supposed to get this medication?”

(The pharmacist decides to step in.)

Pharmacist: “Ma’am, we have to close for lunch now, but we’ll be back in thirty minutes and will be happy to fill your husband’s prescriptions then.”

Irate Wife: “We’re travelling; we don’t have time to wait!”

Pharmacist: “If I may ask, where are you travelling to?”

Irate Wife: “We’re on our way to Texas.”

Pharmacist: “If you don’t want to wait here for the medicine, there is another pharmacy in our chain on your route. By the time you get there, they will be back from their lunch and be able to fill your medicine.”

Irate Wife: “This is ridiculous! I want all of your names; I’m reporting you to home office!”

(Our pharmacist calmly gives her our names and the woman leaves with her husband.)

Fellow Pharmacy Technician: “So, she’s reporting us for… following the law?”

Me: “Yes. Yes, she is.”

[florida80]

Will Need A Sedative For The Husband

Arkansas, Ignoring & Inattentive, Jerk, Patients, Pharmacy, USA | Right | September 25, 2019


(I work as a pharmacy technician. On the weekends, we don’t get drug shipments, which can lead to some… interesting situations.)

Customer: “I need to get this prescription filled. It’s for my wife; she’s at home waiting for it.”

Me: “Certainly, sir, just let me put it into our system.”

(I proceed to enter the patient’s information into our computer.)

Me: “All right, sir, it will be about fifteen minutes.”

Customer: “I’ll just wait right here. She needs it tonight.”

(As we are beginning to fill the prescription, we realize we have none of the medication he needs. The pharmacist calls him over.)

Pharmacist: “Sir, I’m sorry, but we don’t have any of this medicine here. We can order it today and it will be here Monday.”

Customer: “I don’t have time to wait; she needs it tonight!”

Pharmacist: “Well, I can call another pharmacy to see if they have any.”

Customer: “You do that!”

(The pharmacist calls the other store. They have two of the pills, which should be enough to get the man’s wife through the weekend.)

Pharmacist: “Sir, the pharmacy in [Town about thirty minutes away] has enough of this drug to get her through the weekend. Would you like to transfer this prescription there?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to drive that far!”

Pharmacist: “Well, I can call the doctor to see about getting it changed to something we do have.”

Customer: “Fine, call them now! Hurry up. She needs this d*** medicine tonight!”

(The pharmacist calls the doctor. He refuses to change the medicine. The pharmacist explains that the customer is insisting that they need the medication tonight. The doctor informs us that she can wait to start the treatment on Monday without any problems.)

Pharmacist: “Okay, sir, I called the doctor and he wouldn’t change it, but he said it would be fine for your wife to wait until Monday to begin the treatment.”

Customer: “She needs the medicine tonight! I don’t understand why you won’t just give me the d*** pills!”

Pharmacist: “Sir, we don’t have a single one of those pills to give you.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. They had them at the hospital. Why can’t one of you just go to the hospital and get some more of them?! She needs them!”

Pharmacist: “I’m sorry, it’s not legal for us to do that. Your doctor said your wife will be fine until Monday.”

Customer: “Why won’t you just fill my d*** prescription?”

Pharmacist: “Because, sir, we don’t have any of the pills.”

Customer: “This is bulls***. If anything happens to her, it’s your fault!”

(The customer left, angry. He was back on Monday to pick up his wife’s prescription. And guess what? She was fine.)

[florida80]

Calm At The Sight Of Mayhem

Grocery Store, Jerk, Pharmacy, USA, Virginia | Right | September 25, 2019


(I go to a store to get some photos printed for my job, one of which is a photo of my cat. As I go to ask for my photos, an older cashier who isn’t actually specialized in photos comes to help me. Before I get to see my photos and pay, I hear a woman yelling.)

Woman: “What do you mean, you won’t take it?! I can’t stay here anymore! I’m about to leave!”

(She walks over to the cashier who is in the middle of helping me. I stand back, a little afraid of what she might do.)

Woman: “Hey, you! I need your help! She says it won’t take this coupon!”

Cashier: “Well, miss, you actually have the wrong items.”

(The woman points to her coupon and back to her products.)

Woman: “No, see, look here. That’s [product], right? And this says, ‘[product].’”

Cashier: “Well, miss, nothing’s coming up. I’m sorry.”

Woman: “Well, then, your system is broken. I swear, every time! Look…”

(The woman is obviously upset, and she isn’t shy. This exchange continues for almost half an hour before she hands him her credit card and wanders off to find some chips to buy. At this point, I carefully go to get my photos to look at. But before I can purchase them, the woman is called back to the counter.)

Cashier: “Susan! Susan! Are you ready to check out?”

Woman: *still very frustrated* “Susan? My name’s Vicky! Ha, why are you calling me Susan? But that’s supposed to be on sale! I wouldn’t come here if I had to get things without these coupons!”

(She turns to me, and her demeanor changes drastically. She smiles at my picture of my cat.)

Woman: “Oh, is that your kitty? What’s her name?”

Me: *smiling nervously* “Mayhem.”

Woman: “Wow, Mayhem? She’s cute.” *to cashier* “These coupons should work!”

(Finally, she’s rung up, and she leaves the store.)

Me: “Does she come here a lot?”

Cashier: “Oh, yeah, everyone knows Susan. Give her a few hours; she’ll be back.”

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #167681 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=167681)

Australia, Pharmacy | Unfiltered | September 25, 2019


I am the customer in this story. My friends and I are divers – we use a compressor in the boat and dive with lines to breathe through. The compressor has filters that work best stuffed with feminine hygiene pads and honey (it catches all dust and adds a pleasant taste to the air). Also to put on a wetsuit it helps to have something slippery on your legs (pantyhose works great)

Heading out of town for weekend dive trip my friends and I stop at a country town and walk into a pharmacy. We spend some time checking out the pantyhose display looking for some that would fit us. We are three rather big guys. Not being regular buyers it takes awhile. Having made our choice we approach the assistant at the counter, while making our purchases one of my friends says me “Have you changed the filters lately?” Remembering that I have not I ask the assistant for a package of feminine hygiene pads. We get a very strange look, not helped when my other friend asks “By the way do you have any honey?”

[florida80]

Who Put Sand(paper) Up Their Crotches?

Bad Behavior, Dallas, Language & Words, Pharmacy, Texas, USA | Right | September 23, 2019


(I am at a pharmacy at 3:00 am trying to pick up some toilet paper. There are two people arguing somewhere near the rear of the store and the store clerk is falling asleep at the checkout. It is when I get to the toilet paper section that I discover that the people arguing are standing in front of my goal. Not wanting to get anywhere near this nasty-sounding fight, I go down a few aisles to wait out the storm. That’s when I hear this gem:)

Lady: “We ain’t buying that s***ty a** s***!”

Guy: “That crap you always buy always gets all up in my a**. We be buying a** wipes, not f****** tissue paper!”

Lady: “I’m not rubbing my crotch with this sandpaper bulls***!”

Guy: “This ain’t nothing like sandpaper. This s*** be tight and it ain’t gonna rub ya raw!”

(I’m an aisle over at this point trying not to laugh too loudly. They’re making sailors proud with their foul language. I’ve never heard such a colorful argument about toilet paper before. They continue this for a bit when the guy drops some math on the lady.)

Guy: “Look right here. This has 200 sheets per f****** roll. There be four rolls in this s***. With five sheets for every hardcore a**-wiping and four hardcore a**-wipings for each s***, this f****** roll gonna last for ten hardcore s*** sessions. That’s f****** forty hardcore s***s for five f****** dollars. And your b****-a** s*** costs f****** ten bucks and I gotta dig the f****** s*** nuggets out of my a** every time I use this s***.”

(They must have heard me laughing at this point as they got really quiet. I don’t know if the guy ever convinced the lady to buy whatever it was. Definitely spiced up my earlier morning.)

[florida80]

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You Can’t Insure Against Evil

Bad Behavior, Parents/Guardians, Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | September 22, 2019


(A young woman pulls up to the drive-thru pharmacy to pick up Ritalin for her son, who is sitting in the backseat. The medication isn’t ready so I check the system and see that the insurance isn’t covering it. A reason is usually provided, but not in this case.)

Evil Mom: “That makes no sense. We always get it filled here and there’s never a problem. The insurance covers everything.” *classic line with pharmacy customers who think insurance is magic and has no limitations*

Me: “I understand. But I just tried to run it through the insurance and they rejected it without giving a reason why. Would you be able to call them?”

Evil Mom: “Okay, I’ll call right now.” *looks at her insurance cards angrily* “So, what’s the number?”

Me: *confused why she thinks I know the number off the top of my head* “There should be a customer service number on the back of the card.”

Evil Mom: *still angry* “Member services?”

Me: “Yes.”

(She calls and remains sitting in the single-lane driveway, blocking a line of cars with no regard for the other people who came for their medications.)

Me: “Could you pull around the store to make the call?”

Evil Mom: “I’m not leaving this spot until I get my son’s meds.”

(The pharmacist comes over.)

Pharmacist: *friendly* “I’m sorry, but would you be able to—”

Evil Mom: *without looking at us* “I’m not leaving.” *rolls the window up in our faces*

(The pharmacist curses under her breath and leaves to help other customers. The mom reaches someone from the insurance company and puts the window back down. For fifteen minutes, I listen to her scream at the representative. The whole store can hear her through the drive-thru dropping profuse F-bombs and bullying the rep. Her son is fidgeting in the back seat, but sadly, he doesn’t look surprised by this behavior.)

Evil Mom: “Why isn’t my son’s medication covered? You are supposed to cover it and he needs this! What is your name? Okay. And what is your last name? ‘L’ is your last name? Wow. That’s a weird last name. Then give me your employee number. What do you mean, you don’t have numbers? So, how does your company have you on file? Give me your information. You know what? Nevermind. I want to speak to a manager. Now.”

(A car behind her honks.)

Other Customer: *shouting forward* “What’s going on? It’s been almost half an hour! Just go inside!”

Evil Mom: *shouting back* “SHUT THE F*** UP!”

(Eventually, the cars behind her begin leaving the line. None of them come inside the store. Mom, still on the phone, throws a discount prescription card and her welfare card at me and looks expectant. I return a blank look.)

Evil Mom: *pleasant voice* “I’m waiting for you.”

Me: *confused as to what she expects me to do, since the insurance issue has not been resolved* “Did they put the claim through? If so, I can try to re-run it.”

Evil Mom: *arrogantly* “Just run the cards and give me the medication. I’m going to pay the same amount as I did last time. Use the cards I just gave you and give me his pills.”

Me: “It still has to go through the insurance first.”

(The mom continues screaming obscenities simultaneously at the phone and now at me. The pharmacist comes over again and takes charge of the situation.)

Pharmacist: “You need to stop talking like that to our staff. You’re cursing and insulting us. We don’t need that. In the future, I think you need to use a different pharmacy.”

Evil Mom: *in a weirdly amused way* “Who are you even? I didn’t ask you anything.”

(The pharmacist and I are fed up. I look back and see that the store manager has been listening to everything in the background. The pharmacist tries to run the medication through the insurance again but the rejection is still coming up.)

Pharmacist: “The insurance is still not going through. We’ve done what we can. The cash price is $130 and we can fill it for you.”

(The mom sped away in a flash without another word. We were surprised she didn’t curse us out one more time. We anticipate that she has already called corporate to tell them we are horrible people preventing her from getting her son’s medication. The store manager who overheard said she will vouch for us. If that evil mom knew how to be patient and work with people, there is a chance she could have gotten her son’s medication filled. I feel really bad for that kid.)

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #163255 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=163255)

Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | September 16, 2019


(Please note that any and all patient-specific information has been completely redacted from this story, so that the edited anecdote below is entirely HIPAA-compliant.) The pharmacy I work at is located inside a grocery store, and we can ring out items from the main store also, but only about as many as an express line can take (not a whole cart full). We also do not have a scale in the pharmacy, so we can only ring out produce that is pre-bagged with a bar code or is sold by quantity and not by weight. I was working alone shortly before closing on a weekend, when somebody came by to pick up medicine for their spouse. One of the prescriptions was a brand name medicine with a high copay. The person whined about the cost (which was set by the insurance company, not the pharmacy) briefly, then asked me to ring out their grocery items because they only had one check with them and no credit card. They had an overflowing cart with well over a hundred dollars of merchandise, which included at least three items I could immediately see that have to be weighed. I informed the person that I cannot do that, but the cashiers for the main store can scan the grocery items, print a slip for them to bring back to the pharmacy, and then they could pay for both the cart of food and the medicines on one check (this is not the first time something like this has happened, and usually isn’t that big of a deal). I also politely asked the person to please take care of this immediately, because the pharmacy was supposed to be closing in about ten minutes. Fast forward to at least fifteen minutes later. The person is back, and sits down on the bench in front of the pharmacy to proceed to hunt through their pockets and bag for their check. Five or ten minutes later they give up, and inform me that they are going to pay with cash (why they didn’t do that in the first place I will never know). Eventually, they pull out exactly the amount of cash except for the change portion, and seem confused when I inform them that I need an additional $0.xx. In the end, I give up on them finding enough change and raid the take-a-penny-leave-a-penny (which thankfully happened to have a dime and a nickel in it in addition to the pennies, for some unfathomable reason) for the last few cents so I can go home.

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #162040 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=162040)

Charleston, Illinois, Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | September 5, 2019


(I’m the customer in this story, sadly enough. I’m a student at a state college and I have to walk seven-ish blocks to a big-chain drugstore in town to get my prescriptions filled, as two of them can’t be filled at the school pharmacy. On the way to the pharmacy at the back, I stop and grab a drink.

Me: “Hi! I have a prescription to fill, and I’d also like to pay for this before I forget.” (I hand the pharmacist my drink, which I’ve finished half of.)

Pharmacist: “Fine by me! That’ll be [total].”

(It’s only when I reach into my purse that I realize it’s quite a bit lighter than it usually is.)

Me: “Oh, ****.”

(I dig around for several minutes, trying to find some loose change, but I come up empty-handed.)

Me: “****, I left my wallet in my dorm… I am SO sorry!”

(The only person in line behind me reaches into his pocket.)

Other Customer: “How much is it?”

Pharmacist: “No need, sir. I’ll get my manager, see what we can do.”

(She calls up her manager.)

Manager: “I’ll cover the cost. I could technically have you arrested for theft, but I’m going to be nice and let you off easy. Don’t consume anything until you know you can pay for it from now on, okay?”

Me: “Thank you so much!”

(I sit down and wait for my prescription to be filled. Eventually the pharmacist emerges instead of calling my name.)

Pharmacist: “Okay, your prescription is ready…but it’s [cost].”

(My heart sinks, but I smile.)

Me: “That’s all right. Can you hold it for me? It may take me about [time] to get back.”

Pharmacist: “Of course.”

(I walk the seven or so blocks to my dorm and back, now with my wallet. Thirsty again, I grab another drink but make a point of not opening it.)

Me: “Hi, I have a prescription ready to pick up under [My Name], and could you ring this up twice, please?”

(The manager tried to insist that he’d cover the cost, but I was more than happy to buy two drinks for the cost of a drink and a half.)

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #160170 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=160170)

Minnesota, Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | August 20, 2019


( I work in a pharmacy as a technician.)

Co-worker: *slams phone on holder* ….. How long was I on the phone?

Me: 15 minutes.

Co-worker: I just spent 15 minutes convincing a woman not to put a tampon into her urethra. I don’t know who told her that it was a good idea to put a tampon into her urethra. *shakes her head while I’m curled over the counter laughing* She even asked me THREE times!

*Two hours later*
Co-worker: You remember the person I was on the phone with a few hours ago?

Me: The tampon lady?

Co-worker: Yea, I found what she was talking about. I was walking through one of the isles and this was on the floor so I was going to throw it away but I looked at it. *she shows me the leaflet and I start laughing again*

Me: But this goes into the vagina! Not the urethra! It’s… just really wide at the base…. but does it even support it?

Co-worker: *snorts* No. And I still wouldn’t recommend it to anyone to use.

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #160120 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=160120)

Minnesota, Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | August 15, 2019


( I’m a in-training pharmacy technician in Walgreens and today was one of our busier days of the week.)

Me: Welcome to Walgreens! Are you picking up today?

Customer: Yes

Me: Can I have your last name?

Customer: It’s (XXXXXXX).

Me: And your first name?

Customer: (XXXXXX)

Me: Alright, Looks like I have two ready for you. Give me a few seconds to grab that.
*I ran around the back of the shelf were we keep are prescriptions and start looking for his name. I found his two prescriptions, which were diapers, and one of them had a note written on it. “Does he want both? See Pharmacist.” After reading, I go to the pharmacist. *
Me: This patient is here to pick these up. *Holds up both bags of diapers*

Pharmacist: *she looks at them* We receive two scripts from his doctor for both. Ask him for which he wants or if he wants both.

Me: Okay. *goes back to the front* So it looks like we received two scripts from your doctor for two brands of diapers. There’s [ Brand 1], which we have 17 of for you, and [brand 2] which is a completion because you picked up 47 earlier.

Customer: Oh I can get both? Great. And I talked to my insurance and they said that they will cover 150 of the diapers every month, so can I get 150 of [brand 1] and 150 of [brand 2] ?

Me: Umm Let me ask my pharmacist that. *runs to the back to tell her what’s going on before she tells me that we can’t do that because they look at Diapers, not by individual brand. I turn back to tell the customer what the pharmacist told me.* So it looks like we can’t do that because your insurance looks at the total diapers and not by individual brands. So by the insurance’s records, you’ve already picked up 150 diapers, including the two I’m hold in my hands.

Customer: No. I didn’t pick up 150. And these two are not the same so they can’t be counted together. *points to brand 1* It’s like these are apples and those *points to brand 2* are oranges. They aren’t the same. You’d think in this time of the world, with out technologically advanced we are, all the answers we want are just a few types away. Then we won’t have to deal with all this brain damage.

Me: …. *nods a long* Umm.. Let me see if my pharmacist knows of an override code that could help us. *Turns to the pharmacist for help because There is NOTHING that I can do, legally.* I need your help…. he’s still going on and on.

Pharmacist: *she walks out* Hi. What seems to be the problem here?

Customer: She’s telling me that I’ve already picked up 150 diapers already.

Pharmacist: Yes that is right, that is what we have on file. *she pulls up his profile on the computer* It looks like you picked up a partial fill last week, 47 of [brand 2]. And with the 17 of [brand 1] and the 84 of [brand 2], that makes up the 150 of this month.

Customer: No. I never picked up any last week.

Pharmacist: If you want, I can call the manager to check the cameras to see who picked it up for you last week.

Customer: No, just give me the 150 of the [brand 1].

Pharmacist: I can’t do that because you’ve already picked up 47 of [brand 2] and you have to complete the doctor’s prescription of 131 diapers of [brand 2].

Customer: *he sighs* But they aren’t the same! You don’t understand! *he points to brand 1* This is like a man that has a penis! And *points to brand 2* this is like a woman that has a vagina! Now. They are NOT the same! Can’t you get the manager or someone that knows what they’re doing to solve this. We are in a technology advanced world! Shouldn’t everything be just a few clicks away on the computer and then we wouldn’t have to suffer brain damage from all of this?!

Pharmacist: …. *A small… awkward pause because she was just absorbing what he said, being that she is the Pharmacy manager….* If you want, I can give your insurance a call to see if they can revert it but again, it will only be able to work starting next month. I can also leave a note in your chart saying to only use [brand 1] as well but this will only be able to go into effect next month when the insurance will start paying for 150.

Customer: *he sighs* Fine, give them a call and call me when you find an answer. But [brand 1] and [brand 2] ARE NOT THE SAME. *he leaves*

Pharmacist: *she just smiles* Have a good day, sir. *she walks quickly back to work area, shaking her head* Anyone up for burgers? My treat.

** Brand 1 and Brand 2 are both diapers, but under two different brands. Example, Huggies and Pampers are both diapers but under different brands.

[florida80]

Wasn’t A Hard Decision

Health & Body, Non-Dialogue, Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Right | August 12, 2019


I was working at the drive-thru window at the pharmacy. A customer pulled up and I asked for his name and date of birth. After he replied, I went to get his prescription out of the waiting bin. I informed him that his insurance did not cover this medication; most insurances do not because it is for erectile dysfunction.

He asked me for the cash price and I told him it was roughly 120 dollars for four pills.

He looked at his wife who was in the passenger seat, looked at me, said, “F*** that. I don’t need a hard-on that bad,” and sped away.

[florida80]

Be Careful Where You Insert That Battery

Austria, Extra Stupid, Pharmacy, Vienna | Right | July 31, 2019


Customer: “I need a medical thermometer.”

Me: “A digital one that’s battery-operated or a glass one without a battery?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

(Since a digital one gives results faster, I grab one and hand it to the customer.)

Customer: “Oh, no, I’ve got one of these at home, but it has no battery, and it’s not working!”

Me: “These run all on battery. Maybe the battery in yours is empty.”

Customer: *thinking hard for a minute* “Maybe that’s why it’s not working anymore.”

Me: *internal facepalm*

[florida80]

Give A Dog A Bone

Michigan, Pets & Animals, Pharmacy, Retail, Rude & Risque, USA | Healthy | July 11, 2019


(One day at work, I hear my pharmacist and another technician talking about an unusual prescription that’s come in. Curious, I switch to a computer nearby and find them discussing a dog who’s been prescribed the generic for Viagra. Apparently, a recent study has indicated that it may be helpful for relieving coughing in dogs, for some reason, and we spend some time discussing how it might work in that regard. Later, as I’m working on the computer and she’s filling prescriptions behind me, she glances up and leans toward me, chuckling.)

Pharmacist: “You know, it’s hard enough for a person to talk to their doctor about this type of medication. I’d think it’d have to be even harder for a dog!”

Me: *playing along* “Well, yeah. Besides not being able to talk, it’s gotta be way more embarrassing for them, with everything all hanging out and no way to disguise it.”

(After a few moments.)

Me: “I can totally see the commercials, though. This gorgeous Golden Retriever stud going ‘Once, I was the laughing stock of the breeding kennel. But now, I’m back to being top dog, thanks to Viagra!’”

Pharmacist: *cracking up* “See, none of the other health care professions get to enjoy jokes like this.”

(I love my coworkers.)

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #155148 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=155148)

Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Unfiltered | June 23, 2019


This happens all the time.

*customer walks up *

Me: Hello!

Customer: Hi, I need to pick up, my doctor called something in earlier.

Me: OK, what’s your name?

Customer: Dr. Blank called it in.

Me: What’s your-

Customer: I think it was for lispil *they usually mean lisinopril, pronounced like it looks*

Me: What’s-

Customer: It was about 2 hours ago, can’t you find it?

Me: *firm voice* What is your NAME?

Customer: Oh! Jane.

Me: And your last name? *medications are sorted by last name*

Customer: *last name*

Me: *finds medication and rings them out*

Honestly, it’s like pulling teeth

[florida80]

Unfiltered Story #152444 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=152444)

Canada, Pharmacy, Saskatchewan | Unfiltered | May 29, 2019


I worked at a pharmacy that was surrounded but seniors homes, so this made up the majority of our clientele, the pharmacy was in a mall which included a grocery store, when the grocery store was closed for Reno’s we brought in some basic staples like milk and bread and continued carrying them after the grocery store re-opened. our suplly was limited we carried only small CARTONS of milk, no jugs.

customer:(with a jug of milk) I want to return this, its passed the expiry date, and I lost the receipt.

me: Ma’am you didn’t purchase this from us, so I cannot process a return

customer: excuse me?! I KNOW where I purchased my milk from, I got from here and you need to return it for me!

me: we do not carry jugs of milk ma’am, only cartons, so you cannot possibly have purchased it from us, perhaps you got it from the grocery store down the hall?

(note I look a lot younger then I am, it is very likely the customer presumed I was in school and only worked part time)
Customer: I bought it from from here, you just must not have been here when the jugs came in.

me: Ma’am we are only open 9 hours a day Monday to Sat and 4 hours on Sundays and I work 8 of those hours Mon-Sat and all of them on Sundays. I place and accept all the orders, I am telling you, we have never had jugged milk in stock, you did not purchase this from us.

Customer:….. oh..sorry *hangs her head and leaves*:

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 7

Bizarre, Jerk, Louisiana, Pharmacy, USA | Right | May 21, 2019


(It is during the Obama presidency. The pharmacy phone rings.)

Caller: “I want to check and see if my prescription is ready.”

Me: “Sure. Could I get your information?”

(I look up the patient and see that his insurance wants additional paperwork from the doctor before they will pay for the medication. This is a VERY common problem, especially for expensive or name-brand medication.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it looks like your prescription isn’t ready because we are still waiting for the doctor to file some additional paperwork with the insurance company.”

Caller: “What do you mean? I was told that my prescription would be ready by five! Why isn’t it ready?”

Me: “Sir, this medication is name-brand and very expensive. Your insurance company doesn’t want to pay for it unless your doctor provides additional paperwork stating that it is medically necessary.”

Caller: “Well, of course it’s medically necessary! My doctor wrote it for me, so I need it! This is ridiculous. I need my medicine!”

Me: “I apologize for that, sir. If you’d like to pay the cash price of [several hundred dollars], I can have your prescription ready in about ten minutes. But unfortunately, if you want your insurance to cover it, you may want to try calling your doctor and making sure he’s filled out the paperwork we faxed to him.”

Caller: “This has nothing to do with my insurance company! You know what this is? This is that ‘Obama-Care’ and his death panels! He’s just trying to kill off all of us old people! I don’t know how he even got in office; he’s a Kenyan!”

(The caller continues spouting out conspiracy theories for another five minutes.)

Caller: “Well, I think I’ve wasted enough of your time. Goodnight.” *click*

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 6

Bizarre, Employees, Massachusetts, Politics, Retail, USA | Working | January 31, 2019


(I work in a major retail chain. One night, we get an unusual truck delivery. Our manager is waiting by the dock with us as we get ready to unload it.)

Manager: *sigh* “All right, everyone. This is going to seem crazy, but I’ve confirmed with the home office that the delivery inside is definitely intended to be ours just the way it is, so just go with it.”

Coworker: “Wait. What the heck is inside?”

Manager: “You’ll see.”

(Shortly after, the truck driver opens the door to reveal an absolutely absurd amount of tangerines. My coworkers and I alternate between staring at the tangerines in amazement and each other in shock and confusion.)

Coworker: “There’s no way this is right. I get that we’re a busy supercenter and all, but there’s no way even we can sell all these oranges before a whole bunch goes bad.”

Manager: “Yep, that’s how I feel, but apparently someone higher up than me disagrees.”

Me: *as I’m sliding my pallet jack under the first pallet* “What reason could there possibly be to make this seem like a good idea?”

Driver: “You want to know what these oranges are for? This is all about that Obamacare!”

(Suddenly, everyone stops what they’re doing to process what the driver has said.)

Manager: “What… What does that have to do with oranges? No, actually, what does that have to do with anything right now?”

Driver: “That’s Obamacare for you; it doesn’t make any sense!”

(We quickly gave up trying to figure out what the driver was talking about. For the next week, all our nightly meetings included a manager urging us all to get a bag of tangerines on the way home. Once the story of the delivery had spread, we would all say goodbye to each other with, “Don’t forget your Obamacare oranges!”)

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 5

At The Checkout, Jerk, Retail, Tennessee, USA | Right | July 8, 2018


(At the store where I work, it is policy to card for ALL tobacco and alcohol purchases. It doesn’t matter if the person has grey hair and more wrinkles than a Shar Pei; we still have to card them. Failure to card can lose me my job and cost me and the store a hefty fine. The customer I am serving here appears to be in at least his 60s.)

Customer: “I’ll take a can of [chewing tobacco], please.”

Me: “Certainly.” *unlocks the tobacco cabinet and gets out the can* “May I see your ID, please?”

Customer: “You’re kidding me!”

Customer’s Buddy: “The state of things now! Is this an Obama rule? This is ridiculous how things are nowadays! Is his one of Obama’s rules?”

Me: “No, it is a store rule.”

Customer & His Buddy: *laughs* “A store rule?!”

(The customer handed me his ID, I typed in the birthdate and told him his total, and he paid and left, both of them still laughing. This is not the first time a customer has railed about “Obama taking away their rights” when asked for ID

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 4

Bizarre, Jerk, Missouri, Retail, Silly, USA | Right | January 15, 2018


(I work at an office supply store in the printing department. It is a Saturday evening, and a coworker and I are currently putting out ads for the next week. We have just closed our doors, and everything is going fine until we get a call. I don’t pay much attention until my coworker calls me over to take it, as it is for my department. Keep in mind that we are currently closed.)

Me: “Thank you for holding. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a price quote on some prints?”

Me: “Sure thing! What are you looking to get?”

(The customer proceeds to describe what he wants, which goes on for a few minutes. The conversation goes well, nothing out of the ordinary, until we reach the end of the conversation.)

Customer: “Sounds good! What time do you all close?”

Me: “We closed about 15 minutes ago, sir, but we open back up at 10:00 tomorrow morning.”

Customer: “Aw, man, really? I am actually just right outside. Could you make an exception?”

Me: “No, I’m afraid not, but like I said, we open back up tomorrow.”

Customer: “But I’m from out of town and I really need this done.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are closed.”

Customer: “But I’m from Texas; does that change anything?”

Me: “Unfortunately not, sir. We are still closed, regardless.”

(We go back and forth like this for several minutes. He is getting irate the longer it goes on, and so am I. I try to keep the friendliest voice I can muster. It seems like he has finally decided to give up, until the customer says something I never expected.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Like I said before, we are closed.”

Customer: *in a threatening tone* “Do I need to call Obama to confirm that you’re closed?”

Me: *legitimately speechless*

Customer: *click*

(After I hung up the phone, I told my coworker and manager. They both got a pretty good kick out of it! It was the strangest phone call I have ever received. We also never did get that phone call from Obama.)

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 3

Post Office | Right | May 25, 2016


(It’s the day before taxes are due and a few last minute customers are mailing out their returns. Customer #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) is addressing his envelope while Customer #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) is filling out a money order for a payment.)

Customer #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “I really got hit this year!”

Customer #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : *murmurs sympathetically*

Customer #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “But I guess I’m just stuck paying like this until we get a Republican governor again.”

Customer #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : *glances at him* “Yeah…?”

(There’s a slight pause as Customer #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) thinks.)

Customer #1 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=1) : “We’ve got a Republican governor right now, don’t we?”

Customer #2 (https://www.vietbf.com/forum/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=2) : “Yup!”

(The Republican governor had already been in office three years; he was preceded by another Republican.)

[florida80]

Obama Drama, Part 2

Retail | Right | September 5, 2014


(I work in a high-end stationery boutique, whose clientele is generally upper middle class and upper class white women in their 40s to 60s – the sort of people whose spending habits didn’t really change when the economy nose dived. This customer appeared to be no different, and the address on the check she paid with confirmed as much.)

Customer: “Where’s your clearance section?”

Me: “We actually don’t have clearance sales, outside of our semi-annual sales after Christmas and Father’s Day.”

Customer: “So everything in here is full-priced?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Customer: *sighs loudly* “Fine, I’ll pay full-price. But I really need to be saving every penny, with that black man as president

[florida80]

Obama Drama

home | Related | June 15, 2014


(It is around the time the 2008 Presidential campaign is beginning to pick up steam, and since my family’s African American, everyone is buzzing about Barack Obama, although some of the older relatives are rather skeptical.)

Cousin: “Can you believe this? It looks like he may have a shot.”

Uncle: “Huh. He won’t win.”

Me: “What makes you think that?”

Uncle: “With the way this country works, he’ll never make it past the primaries. Mark my words.”

Me: “Actually, the primaries are over. He did make it.”

Uncle: “Oh… uh… he still won’t make it.”

(I really wish I could’ve been there to see his reaction when Obama won the national election… for both terms.)

[florida80]

Trying To Kill The Pain, Not The Bank Balance

Friends, Health & Body, Jerk, Money, Pharmacy, UK | Friendly | May 16, 2019


(A friend and I have just gotten piercings. I have some already, so I suggest we get ibuprofen to handle the immediate swelling and pain. We go to our local pharmacy.)

Friend: “Which one do we need?”

Me: “One that has ibuprofen in it.”

Friend: “Ah.” *picks up the most expensive branded box*

Me: “Ugh, I’d rather go with the generic kind.” *picks up my own box*

Friend: “But look at it. It’ll probably kill you!”

Me: “They are literally the same. Yours is branded, though, so they charge extortionate prices.”

Friend: “No, this one is better.”

(I take his box and show him the ingredients on the back. By a stroke of luck, they are EXACTLY the same.)

Friend: *after spending a long time comparing* “Mine is still better!”

(I shrugged and we paid for our own painkillers. He paid £3.49, while I paid 39p.)

[florida80]

Those Who Fling Themselves Will Sting Themselves

Bad Behavior, Great Stuff, Parents/Guardians, Pharmacy, UK, Wild & Unruly | Right | May 15, 2019


(I am at the pharmacy with my one-year-old in her pushchair, waiting for my prescription to be filled. It’s five minutes before closing and the staff have been very helpful so far. A mother with a young girl storms in, slams down a prescription, and shouts at the employee, “And don’t take f****** forever!” Her daughter begins running around the store, picking up items and dropping them, screeching, and being annoying. Then, she spots the pushchair.)

Girl: *to me* “I want to pick up the baby!”

Me: “No, sorry, she’s not well at the moment. You don’t want to catch her cold.”

Girl: “I want the baby, now!”

Me: “No, no picking up or playing with baby today.”

(The girl goes to grab my daughter and I move the pushchair out of reach.)

Me: *to mother* “Could you come get your daughter, please? She’s going to hurt herself.”

(The mother looks at me, smirks, and looks away. The little girl then proceeds to fling herself at my daughter, but as I once again move the pram, she ends up face-planting into a basket of body wash. Cue screaming, crying, and a full-blown tantrum.)

Mother: *comes straight into my face, without picking up or checking on her daughter* “How f****** dare you?! You did that on purpose! I could f****** sue! I’ll smash your head in. You’re gonna be penniless when I’m done with you, b****!”

Me: *in my quiet, furious Mum Voice* “You might actually want to check on your daughter, though by the amount of noise she’s making I don’t think she’s dying. I’d like to see you try and sue. I asked you twice to control your daughter; if you’d actually been watching her this wouldn’t have happened. Now, get out of my face before I move you myself. Besides, I’m sure the CCTV of you threatening me would look lovely on Facebook.”

(The mother silently grabs her daughter and sits down, staring at me like I’m made out of spiders. She grabs her prescription and forces her daughter out the door as the girl shouts for a lollipop.)

Cashier: “Mrs. [My Name], here’s your prescription and the Yankee candle you ordered.”

Me: “I didn’t order anything, sorry.”

Cashier: “I guess this one’s on me, then. Thank you; that woman has been a nightmare for years, and no one’s stood up to her before.”

Me: *laughs* “If it hadn’t been for my daughter, I probably wouldn’t have, either. You know what they say about mother bears and their cubs

[florida80]

A Decent Dose Of Insurance Fraud

Extra Stupid, Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Right | April 30, 2019


Customer: “Why can’t I use my insurance for my pet’s medicine?”

Me: “That’s insurance fraud since it’s for your pet, not you.”

Customer: “But it’s a people prescription, so it should be paid for by my insurance!”

[florida80]

A Decent Dose Of Insurance Fraud

Extra Stupid, Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Right | April 30, 2019


Customer: “Why can’t I use my insurance for my pet’s medicine?”

Me: “That’s insurance fraud since it’s for your pet, not you.”

Customer: “But it’s a people prescription, so it should be paid for by my insurance!”