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Old 11-23-2020   #941
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Doing More Pharm Than Good
CALIFORNIA, EMPLOYEES, LAZY/UNHELPFUL, PHARMACY, SACRAMENTO, USA | WORKING | MAY 31, 2013
(My daughter has a seizure disorder. We are a low-income family, and we get low-cost insurance through the state for her. However, because of this disorder, she has separate insurance through the state; the pharmacy knows this.)

Tech: “Um, okay, so we tried to run your daughter’s medication and it won’t go through. We have to contact [Regular] insurance to see why it won’t go through.”

Me: “Wait, no… you have to run it through [Other] insurance. I called this in like three days ago, and you are now just calling me?! That is the medication she takes for her seizures. I am out, too, and I can’t have her miss a dose.”

Tech: “We did and it didn’t work. You can pay cash for it. That’s $54.99.”

Me: “Look, I am low income. I can’t afford something that expensive. Are you sure you ran it through the right insurance?”

Tech: “Uh, yeah. It’s not my fault you let your insurance lapse or something. You need to call [Regular] insurance and take care of it on your end or else pay cash.”

(I call my daughter’s regular insurance, who confirms my side of things. They call the pharmacy and get them to approve the medication. I call back but request to speak with a pharmacist directly.)

Me: “So, did it work this time?”

Pharmacist: “Yeah, it did. I’m sorry [Tech] was acting that way. She just didn’t want to run it on the other insurance because it takes a few more steps to make.”

Me: “Yeah, I know. I’ve heard this song and dance every month for the last three months and nothing has changed. Look, my kid was totally out of her seizure meds! She could have had a seizure because of your lack of calling me about it in a timely manner and making jump through hoops I don’t need to.”

Pharmacist: “Well, I’m really busy, and I can’t watch everything they do all the time.”

Me: “Wow, you just inspired me to take my business elsewhere and call corporate to complain.”

(Within two hours, my daughter’s prescriptions were transferred to another pharmacy where they DO take the time to run it correctly and call me if/when there is a problem. I recently went back into that first store to return something and there was an entirely new staff in the pharmacy. I hope these ones do actually care!)
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Old 11-23-2020   #942
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One Good Deed Job-Leads To Another
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 28, 2013
(I am working late at night in a 24-hour pharmacy. There are only three customers in the store: a scruffy but clean young couple and another gentleman. The woman in the young couple is very heavily pregnant, and her partner is picking up the range of baby hats we carry and holding them up against her stomach, then looking at the prices and sadly putting them back. They pick up a packet of the cheapest pain medication we carry and bring it to the counter.)

Female Customer: “I’m sorry, but can you please ask the pharmacist if these are safe for me to take?”

Me: “Of course!”

(While we’re waiting for the pharmacist to come out, they tell me they’re expecting their daughter any day now. The pharmacist has been watching the young couple since they came in.)

Pharmacist: “These are fine, but can I ask why you need them?”

Female Customer: “Oh, I have a horrible cough that’s making my back ache even worse. I can’t get to sleep.”

(The pharmacist goes through a list of cough medicines safe for her to take, before the young man shakes his head with tears in his eyes.)

Male Customer: “I’m sorry, I’ve just lost my job and we really can’t afford any of those. Sorry for wasting your time.”

Pharmacist: “That’s okay, but this packet is damaged, and legally I can’t let you take it. Seeing as it was the last one, let me and [my name] go look in the back for some more.”

(The pharmacist takes me out the back, where he puts three packets of name brand painkillers, four bottles of name brand cough syrup, a wheat bag for her back, a tin of formula, a packet of newborn nappies and a few of the hats the couple was looking at into a box. He hands me the box and tells me to take it out to them. I do and they both burst into tears, thanking us over and over again. They leave with huge smiles on their faces.)

Female Customer: “Thank you again!”

Other Customer: “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help but over hear. Did you say you just lost your job at [local company]?”

Male Customer: “Yes, I was an IT tech.”

Other Customer: “I own [other computer store in the area], and I’m looking for a new tech. Can you start tomorrow?”

(There were tears all round that night. A week later, the young woman brought in her beautiful daughter and a giant batch of cupcakes for the pharmacy staff. Best night at work ever!)
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Old 11-23-2020   #943
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Probably Needs Some Valium Too
PHARMACY | RIGHT | MAY 17, 2013
(A customer comes into the drive thru.)

Me: “Hello, how are you, ma’am?”

Customer: “I want my Nexium.”

(She provides her information, but I see that nothing has been filled.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I don’t see that we have anything ready for you.”

Customer: “This always f****** happens! I’ve been trying to get my f****** Nexium for a month! I dropped it off here a month ago!”

Me: “You dropped it off at this location?”

(I ask this, as there are many branches of our chain within a 10 mile radius of each other.)

Customer: “Yes, I only fill here!”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no Nexium in your profile.”

Customer: “Yes their f****** is! This always f****** happens!”

(My coworker takes over, trying to calm her down. My manager has had enough of her mouth, and he goes to tell her off.)

Manager: “Ma’am! You have never filled here! It is not here! We have nothing for you!”

(The customer continues to curse up a storm. Another customer stares at the drive thru window, looking between it and me.)

Customer #2 : “That b**** be crazy.”

Me: “I agree, sir.”

(I suddenly hear the drive thru window slam, and the car speed away.)

Me: “Sorry you had to hear all that, sir.”

Customer #2 : “Nah it’s cool. Hey if something happens, I heard everything!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #944
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It’s Apparent He’s A Parent
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 13, 2013
(My first child is sick and has been up all night crying with a fever. Before the store even opens, I am in the parking lot staring through the store window at the medicine I need with my sick, screaming baby. I can see and hear two employees nearby watching and making fun of me.)

Rude Employee #1 : “Oh my god, do you see that? That crack w**** is here with her crack baby so early in the morning! I thought those kinds of people only came out at night.”

Rude Employee #2 : “I guess you can never tell. I wonder what’s so important that she has to bring her screaming brat with her before we even open?”

(I ignore them as I wait patiently, but after another ten minutes my patience is wearing thin. I am about to tell them off when another employee walks up to the front doors and opens them.)

Nice Employee: “Ma’am, I know the store isn’t open for another twenty minutes, but I wanted to check on you.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. My baby has had a fever all night and just won’t sleep! I only need something to help her fever so she’ll stop crying.”

Nice Employee: “I see. Would you come with me, please?”

(He opens the door for me and lets me into the store.)

Nice Employee: “Get what you need and I’ll meet you on register one to ring you out.”

Rude Employee #1 : “Hey! Don’t let that crack w**** in here. Her baby’s not sick! She’s just scamming you so she can shoplift!”

(Fortunately, the nice employee ignores them and helps me find what I need and walks me to the front of the store)

Nice Employee: “I’m sorry we let you wait out there so long. If I had known I would have gotten to you sooner. Unfortunately the registers are still not open, so I can’t ring you in, but I can let you go home with the medicine.”

Me: “But I have to pay for it. Let me at least leave some money here. You’ve been so nice; you can keep the extra as a tip.”

Nice Employee: “Ma’am, that’s very sweet of you, but I must insist you take your medicine and your sweet little girl home. As a single father, I have been in your shoes before, so I would like to pay for your baby’s medicine.”

Me: “Thank you. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you so much!”

(I always go back to that store just because of that one nice employee. He totally makes up for the rude ones.)
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Old 11-23-2020   #945
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Makes A Difference When Cashiers Are Minus A Few Brain Cells
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 8, 2013
(I’m buying a common cold medicine that is OTC, but you have to be 18 to buy. At the time, I’m 19.)

Cashier: “I need to see your ID.”

(I hand it to her.)

Cashier: “Oh, I’m sorry. I can’t sell this to you.”

Me: “What? Why not? ”

Cashier: “Well, I have to be able to verify you’re over 18.”

Me: “Is there a problem with my ID?”

Cashier: “You were born in 1989.”

Me: “Yes, and it’s 2008, so I’m 19.”

Cashier: “But you could be lying because I don’t know how to figure out how old you are if you were born in 1989. It’s too hard to subtract!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #946
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A Leftist Agenda
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 29, 2013
(I am filling out a form to refill my medication. A fellow customer, here for a flu shot, sits down next to me. Note that I’m left-handed.)

Customer: “Woah! How are you doing that with your left hand?”

Me: “I’m left-handed.”

Customer: “Don’t you people like, flip around letters?”

Me: “No, can’t say I do. I think you’re thinking of dyslexia, which some left-handed people have.”

Customer: “Huh…”

(The customer notices that I’m writing with a gel pen.)

Customer: “Wait… you people can’t use gel pens! How do you write with that?”

Me: “Carefully.”

Customer: “What would happen if you used your right hand? Would it, like, work?”

Me: “Well, for most of us, no. My left hand is like your right hand, and my right hand is like your left hand. You could probably use your left hand if you had to, but it’s not ideal. The same goes for me with my right hand.”

Customer: “That’s so weird! I’ve never seen anything like this!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #947
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Diabetes Meets Rabies
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 27, 2013
(A customer is picking up some diabetic test-strips, and I am ringing him up.)

Me: “How are you doing today, sir?”

Customer: “I’m alright; how about yourself?”

Me: “I’m doing great, thanks. Did you have any questions for the pharmacist?”

(The customer gestures at the test strips, jokingly.)

Customer: “Yeah, do I really have to poke myself for these to work?”

Me: “Yep, I’m afraid so.”

Customer: “Can’t I just poke you instead?”

Me: *laughing* “Sorry, I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way, sir.”

(The customer gestures at my multiple facial piercings.)

Customer: “You look like the type that would enjoy that, though.”

Me: “Your doctor might have a problem with that, though.”

(When a customer picks up a prescription, they’re required by law to sign, stating that they’ve received it. Our pharmacy does this through an electronic prompt. The customer looks at it.)

Customer: “What’s this?”

Me: “It’s just a way to say that you’ve gotten your prescription. That way there’s no confusion later. It’s as much for your protection as ours really.”

Customer: “Well what happens if I don’t sign it?”

Me: “Then unfortunately, we’re not allowed to give you your prescriptions.”

Customer: “WELL I GUESS I’M NOT GETTING ANYTHING TODAY!”

(The customer THROWS the electronic pen across the counter, hitting me in the face. He turns, and practically skips away. The pharmacist and I aren’t sure if he is joking, but by the end of the day he still hasn’t come back!)
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Old 11-23-2020   #948
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The Opposite Of Disappearing Ink
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 21, 2013
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it looks like this prescription is expired.”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “The law says we can’t take prescriptions this old.”

Customer: “But you said it’s expired. Where does it say that?”

Me: “It doesn’t, but see the date? That’s several months old. We couldn’t fill it now if we tried.”

Customer: “You’re telling me if I’d brought this in exactly as it is just a few months ago, you’d have been able to take it?”

Me: “Theoretically, yes.”

Customer: “So why won’t you take it now? Nothing’s changed!”

Me: “Except today’s date, sir. The prescription expired a few weeks after it was written. You can even see the disclaimer written at the bottom.”

Customer: “So why doesn’t it notify me when it expires? It ought to say ‘expired’ on it!”

Me: “Um… the paper isn’t going to magically print the word ‘expired’ if you wait too long to bring it in.”

Customer: “Well, it should!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #949
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This Cashier’s Number Is Up
PHARMACY | WORKING | JUNE 9, 2013
(I am 20 years old at this time. Valentine’s Day is approaching, so I go out to the store to buy some fake wine and chocolates for my boyfriend.)

Cashier: “Oooh, a date for Valentine’s Day?”

Me: “Yep! We’re going out to dinner, and I thought I’d buy this stuff for dessert.”

Cashier: “Nice! Can I see some ID for the wine?”

Me: “Oh, that’s grape juice. It doesn’t have alcohol.”

Cashier: “No, I need to see your ID for the wine. I can’t sell it to you if you’re under 21.”

Me: “No, it’s sparkling grape juice. I’m 20 and I’ve bought it before. It doesn’t have any alcohol in it.”

Cashier: “I suppose I can let it slide for a pretty girl like you.”

Me: “Excuse me? First off, that would be illegal if this was real wine, and second, I just mentioned I have a boyfriend. It’s fake wine. Please just let me buy this and leave.”

Cashier: “No need to be like that. I’ll sell it to you.”

Me: “Thank you! What’s my total?”

Cashier: “Your phone number.”

Me: “What?”

Cashier: “I’ll give this to you for your phone number! I can take you out someplace really nice to eat, and then we can go back to my place if you know what I mean. I get free condoms for working here!”

Me: “Here’s $10. This should cover my purchases. I’m going to leave and pretend you didn’t just ask me to have sex with you in exchange for dinner and my groceries.”
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Old 11-23-2020   #950
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Needs To Take A Chill Pill, Part 2
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 4, 2013
Me: “Thank you for calling [Pharmacy], how can I—”

Customer: “So I just requested a refill, and I want to know when it will be ready.”

Me: “Okay, what is your name?”

(The customer gives her name. I see that no refill was requested. The medication is out of refills, and needs approval from the doctor.)

Me: “I am very sorry, but we must not have gotten your refill request. I see that there are no refills available. I am going to have to fax the doctor.”

Customer: “I did that. I went to their site and asked the doctor to do that. It should have just given my request to you, and it should be ready by now.”

Me: “So, which website did you go to? Was it ours, or your doctor’s site?”

Customer: “His, duh! How can you be that stupid? I requested it, and you see that request, and then you just fill out the paper to give me refills. All the doctor does is sign it. It should take like all of five minutes to get that done. So when the h*** is my prescription going to be ready?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry. We are in no way connected to your doctor’s office. They have their own software, and we have ours. We cannot in any way see what you have requested with your doctor’s office. We have to wait until he contacts us, and sometimes that can take up to three days for a response. Now if you are out of this medica—”

Customer: “This is unacceptable! I know how these computer things work. You can look up any person’s prescriptions anywhere and anytime, no matter what pharmacy they are at! Now fill my f****** prescription!”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no way I can do that. That would be in direct violation of federal law. There is a privacy act that means that we cannot share medical information with anyone else without your direct consent. Would you like it if I could access your medical record right now and see things like what you went to the ER for?”

(Note: this customer is a notorious drug seeker, and is well known at ERs and Urgent Cares throughout the area. She also knows that we know.)

Customer: “…uh, no.”

Me: “That’s why we can’t see anything your doctor may have on you, or what requests you may have made to him. It’s to protect your privacy. Now since this isn’t a narcotic, I can ask the pharmacist if we can advance you some of your medication until we hear back from the doctor.”

Customer: “Uh yeah, okay. That will be fine then.”

(My pharmacist later pulls me to the side and tells me that I did a great job with a difficult customer, and with keeping my cool. Come Christmas time, I got a few extra bucks in my bonus!)
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Old 11-23-2020   #951
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Misconceiving The Point
PHARMACY | WORKING | AUGUST 21, 2013
(I am a 20-year-old female, but I guess I look younger. This occurs the first time I am buying condoms. I feel a little awkward, since it is my only item, and I’ve never bought them before.)

Cashier: *holding up the box of condoms* “Will this be all?”

Me: “Yep.”

Cashier: “I don’t think I can sell these to you.”

Me: “W-why?”

Cashier: “I think you’re too young to be having sex.”

Me: “That’s absurd! I’m 20 years old!”

Cashier: “Yeah, okay. Prove it! Let me see your driver’s license.”

(I start to go through my purse, when an old lady in line behind me speaks up towards the cashier.)

Old Lady: “Hey, you pimply a**-hole! Just let the girl buy her stuff. She’s trying to buy contraception to have safe sex instead of risking an STD or a pregnancy. Even if she was younger than 20, and I believe she is telling the truth, you should still sell them to her to prevent another teenage pregnancy! On top of it, we are on a college campus! How many young teenagers do you see around here? Most of the people who shop here are 17 or older! Just give her the d*** condoms!”

(The cashier wordlessly scans my items and bags them, and takes my cash.)

Me: “Have a nice day, jack-a**! Oh, and I’m paying for her stuff, too
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Old 11-23-2020   #952
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Make His Life A Living Bell
PHARMACY | ROMANTIC | AUGUST 13, 2013
(I am a cashier at a small town pharmacy. An older customer walks in making a jingling sound, and I see that he has bells tied to his shoelaces. It is August, and he appears anything but jolly, so I am perplexed by the bells.)

Me: “Sir, if you don’t mind my asking: why the bells?”

Customer: “My wife is going deaf, and she gets mad when I ‘sneak up on her.’ This was her solution.”
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Old 11-23-2020   #953
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In Need Of Valium
PHARMACY | RELATED | AUGUST 7, 2013
(I am eight years old. My mom and I are shopping, and we pass the drug store.)

Mom: “I need to go there.”

Me: “Mommy, no, I’m tired! I wanna go home; let’s go home!”

Mom: “No. It’ll be quick.”

(Mom pulls me into the drug store.)

Me: “Why do we have to go here? It’s a bad place!”

Mom: “Oh, really? Why do you say that.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s called a drug store, and I heard that drugs are bad! On TV!”

Mom: “Uh huh.”

Me: *to other customers* “DRUGGIES! You’re bad people! Drugs are BAD—”

(My mom hustles me out of there and never takes me back!)
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Old 11-23-2020   #954
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You Really Don’t Want That On An Open Wound
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JULY 17, 2013
(I’m currently doing inventory at the local pharmacy where I work. An older customer comes up to me with her friend, in a panic.)

Customer: “Can you help me?! I need some ‘Polysperm’!”

(I assume she means ‘Polysporin’, the topical ointment that treats infections.)

Me: “Did you mean ‘Polysporin’?”

Customer: “Oh, no! I DEFINITELY need some ‘Polysperm’!”

Me: “I’m sorry; I haven’t heard of that product. May I ask what you are using it for?”

Customer: “Oh, I scraped my elbow, and want to put that ‘Polysperm’ on it!”

Me: “Okay, let me show you where it’s stocked.”

(I point to the display of ‘Polysporin’.)

Customer: *to her friend* “Young kids these days! They don’t know anything!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #955
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An Impatient Patient
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JULY 11, 2013
(It is a Sunday, so not many pharmacies are open. I’ve come in with my friend, who is rather unwell. The staff know my husband and I quite well, as we’re in there for our regular medication. Additionally, I have multiple piercings, a rather large tattoo on my nape of my neck, and teal green hair.)

Pharmacist: “Won’t be long; please take a seat.”

(We do, and I give the tech I know well a smile and a nod in greeting. Another customer enters.)

Customer: “How long will it be for my medication?”

Pharmacist: “About 20 minutes. We have a few people in front of you.”

Customer: “Fine. I wouldn’t come here if you weren’t the only pharmacy open on a bloody Sunday; you’re always slow!”

(The pharmacist brushes it off and goes to make up medications.)

Customer: “I’m only having to wait this long because of stupid drug freaks.”

(My friend turns to say something, but I put my hand on her arm and shake my head.)

Customer: “Yeah, I mean you, green freak! What, come in for your methadone early, and they won’t give it to you?”

(I’ve deliberately turned my back on him at this point.)

Customer: “F****** druggies! We pay for you to get f****** high.”

Pharmacy Tech: “Sir, can you watch your language please?”

Customer: “No I f****** won’t! That stupid b**** is the reason I have to wait so f****** long! She’s strung out, look at the f****** circles under her eyes; they’re all bloodshot!”

Pharmacy Tech: “I’ll have you know that young lady there is a full-time carer for her husband, who is disabled. And all this whilst being disabled herself. She looks like she hasn’t slept in a week because she probably hasn’t; between caring for him, volunteering with [national advice organization], and helping out her friend here who is rather unwell. And I don’t personally care if my taxes are being used to help her out; I wish there were more people like her out there!”

Customer: “I… I… I demand to see a pharmacist!”

Pharmacist: “Sir, I am not going to reprimand my tech for handling that much better than I would have. Do not insult my customers. Here is your prescription back; please fill it somewhere else.”

(The customer stomps out.)

Me: “I’m really sorry I caused that.”

Pharmacist: “Eh, don’t worry; he’s always an a** when he comes in here. Besides, he has an exemption certificate, which means our taxes are paying for his meds too!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #956
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Let’s Hope This Negative Becomes A Positive
PHARMACY | WORKING | OCTOBER 3, 2013
(My sister and her husband are having trouble conceiving. It’s been four long and emotional years for all of us. She forgot to buy pregnancy tests last time she was out, so I offer to get some on my way over to her house. I hand over my items to the cashier.)

Cashier: *picking up pregnancy test with a gleeful smile* “Oooh! Is this a good thing or a bad thing?”

Me: “…what?”

Cashier: “Are you hoping you are or hoping you aren’t?”

Me: “That is a pretty personal question.”

Cashier: “Yeah, but I’m stuck here all day with nothing to do. So I’m thinking you cheated on your boyfriend and hope you aren’t carrying some random guy’s kid!” *huge grin* “Am I right?”

Me: “They’re not for me, but that’s really none of your business.”

Cashier: *offended and hostile* “Y’know, it’s people like YOU who make the world a terrible place! Try being friendly instead of such a b****!”

Me: “Just finish ringing me up, please.”

Cashier: “I HOPE YOUR B****** KID HAS A.D.D.!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #957
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Doing A Real Job On Doing A Real Job
PHARMACY | WORKING | OCTOBER 3, 2013
(I have just gotten off of a split shift, during my second seven-day work week. My children have joined me for the last part of my second shift to help me out and we are heading home. It’s just after 8:30 pm, and I’ve been at it since 6 am. We go to the pharmacy next to my store to buy some ibuprofen, and I go up to the pharmacy desk to pay since the main cash has a huge lineup of people buying toilet paper and snack foods. After waiting about two minutes the pharmacy technician, who’s been looking at me and sighing deeply, finally comes to serve me.)

Employee: “Are you here to pick up a prescription?”

Me: “No, I’d just like to pay for these.”

Employee: *as she’s scanning my pills* “Okay, well this cash is only for prescription medication purchases. You should really have gone to the main cash.”

(I’ve often seen customers paying for everything from band aids to makeup at this cash without buying prescriptions, as long as they had some sort of medication with them from the pharmacy area where I picked up my pills.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry about that. I just assumed that you pay for medicine at the pharmacy counter. I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

Employee: “Yeah, well we’re really busy you know, and this takes me away from doing all my work. Now it’s going to take me even longer to finish up and get out of here tonight.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. I work in retail myself, I know how frustrating it is when you’re busy and you have to stop to help a customer or coworker. It can be—”

Employee: “And you know, just because it doesn’t look like we’re doing anything, it doesn’t mean we’re not busy. We have a lot to do here and this is really annoying! You know, people are just leaving us with their prescriptions all the time.”

Me: “Well, that is your job but still I can understand—”

Employee: “When customers like you waste our time like this it’s really annoying. It’s going to take us even longer to finish up now.”

(The pharmacist finally hands me my change. My children are clinging to me nervously and the customers around me are all shuffling around awkwardly, trying not to look our way. I’ve had enough.)

Me: “Look, I’ve literally been working since 6am. I worked seven days in the last week, I have one day off this week, and I’ll be working from home, and then I work another seven days. I am exhausted, and I regularly have to stop what I’m doing to help my customers, coworkers and employees even when they really could have managed without me. I regularly have to work late or start early due to these interruptions, and my job is 90% physical work on the floor doing heavy lifting and going up and down ladders in a dusty stockroom. You are preaching to the choir here lady. And I’ll tell you, I have never spoken to a customer the way you just spoke to me, or made them feel guilty about coming in to shop and making me do my JOB! Thank you and good night.”
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Old 11-23-2020   #958
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Cold And Uncaring
PHARMACY | WORKING | SEPTEMBER 12, 2013
(Our pharmacy has recently switched to a new manufacturer of Lorazepam, which requires refrigeration. I overhear a conversation between a patient’s caregiver, and the pharmacist.)

Caregiver: “So I was told this stuff has to be kept cold? Is it still good if it wasn’t?”

Pharmacist: “No, you’re going to have to get it replaced. If it’s been left in room temperature for more than a few hours, I cannot recommend you giving it to your patient.”

Caregiver: “Well nobody told me it had to be kept cold! I want a free replacement.”

Pharmacist: “We put ‘REFRIGERATE’ on every label; don’t you read your patient’s labels?”

Caregiver: “I don’t have time to read all the labels.”

Pharmacist: “Then how do you know you’re giving the drugs properly to the patient?”

Caregiver: “…”

Pharmacist: “That’ll be $30 for a new bottle.”
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Old 11-23-2020   #959
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Drugs Can Make You See Things
PHARMACY | RIGHT | SEPTEMBER 2, 2013
(I am at the pharmacy picking up my prescription. I am standing in line behind a very elderly lady.)

Pharmacist: “Hello, ma’am. What can I do for you?”

Elderly Lady: “I am picking up my prescription. It’s under Mrs. [last name].”

(I overhear the elderly lady, and realize that she has the same last name as I do. This is not a totally uncommon name, but it doesn’t happen too often.)

Pharmacist: “Okay! Here we go I think it’s… huh…”

(The pharmacist looks confused as she picks up some pills.)

Pharmacist: “Can you tell me your first name please? I don’t think I grabbed the right one.”

Elderly Lady: “Sure, it’s [first name].”

(By a crazy coincidence, this is my first name too! At this point the pharmacist widens her eyes in shock as she stares at the pill box in her hand. She starts to stammer.)

Pharmacist: “But… um… I don’t… uhh… how?”

Me: “Um, I think those might be mine. I have the same first name and last name. Those are my birth control pills.”

Pharmacist: “Oh thank GOD! I thought I was in the twilight zone!”

Elderly Lady: “Oh dear! No wonder! No I don’t want THOSE!”
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Old 11-23-2020   #960
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Stupidity Is Its Own Reward, Part 2
PHARMACY | RIGHT | AUGUST 23, 2013
(I’m about to ring a customer up. I’m supposed to ask if they have our rewards card, and if they say no, I offer them to sign up for it, as it’s free of charge and relatively quick to do.)

Me: “Good evening, ma’am. Do you have a rewards card?”

Customer: “No. What’s the benefit of it?”

Me: “The rewards card allows you to get the sale prices of whatever’s on sale for the week, and with certain sale items and over the counter medications. You build up rewards points, which you can use to save money later on.”

Customer: “Okay. Do I need anything for it?”

Me: “All we need is some basic info, just for identification purposes. Would you like to sign up? It’s free of charge.”

Customer: *says nothing, fumbles around her purse*

Me: “Ma’am? Would you like to sign up for the card?”

(The customer takes out her credit card and swipes it, paying for the purchase.)

Me: “Okay.”

(I hand her the receipt and her bags.)

Me: “Have a good night.”

Customer: “So, do I get the rewards now?”

Me: *screaming internally*
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