(An order comes to my pharmacy for a well-known antibiotic. This antibiotic is known to smell exactly like rotten eggs, so most of us just hold our breath while we count it and try not to think about it too much. We dispense it to a woman who is picking it up for her teenage son. Everything is normal and she leaves with the prescription, but about 10 minutes later she comes stomping back into the pharmacy, pretty much shoves the person that I am currently helping out of the way, and throws the bottle of medication on the counter.)
Customer: “I want to speak to your manager right now! You guys gave me rotten medication!”
Me: “Really? Let me look at the expiration date on your bottle. Normally we don’t keep anything that has one less than a year away.”
(I look at the bottle and see that the pharmacist wrote a date of over a year away, and I go over to our stock bottle and check and the numbers correspond with each other.)
Me: “Hmm. Well, ma’am, it doesn’t look like this medication is expired but I will have the phar—”
Customer: “You are just lying! I mean, come on and open that bottle! It smells totally rotten! I can’t believe that you would ever give someone bad medication! My son is very very ill!”
Me: “Oh, that’s just because the active chemical that is in this medication has a bad smell. Trust me, I wish there was something that we could do about it back here, too. Most of us hold our breath while we count it.”
Customer: “Stop ****** lying to me. You just don’t want to admit you did something wrong! I will have your job for this, b****!
(At this point the pharmacist who has been listening the whole time walks over.)
Pharmacist: “Ma’am, while I don’t like the fact that you are calling my staff names like that I will let you know two things. One is, certain chemicals have a bad smell. It’s just a fact of life. So, while I know that smell is unpleasant, it’s just one of those side effects that come with being able to take medications that will help your sick son. I assure you it’s supposed to smell that bad. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t work right. Two, since you don’t seem to want to listen to my employees and call them awful names, this will be the last time that you or any members of your family can shop or fill any type of medication here. Maybe in the future you can learn how to treat people the way you want to be treated.”
(The woman proceeded to turn bright red with embarrassment and tried to apologize, but my boss wouldn’t hear it. That was almost two years ago and he still will not allow her or her family to fill their prescriptions at his pharmacy.)
(A customer comes up to the pharmacy counter. Keep in mind, Sudafed (pseudoephedrine) is controlled in all 50 states as it is used to make methamphetamine.)
Customer: “I need some Sudafed.”
Me: “Did you want Sudafed or [store brand]?”
Customer: “What’s the difference?”
Me: “The active ingredient is the same but sometimes they change the inactive ingredients. It still works the same though. Plus, [store brand] is about 5 bucks cheaper.”
Customer: “The recipe said I need Sudafed.”
Me: “…”
Customer: *realizing what she said* “Um, s***. Never mind, I got to go.”
Customer: “They’re not for me, they’re for my dad. He’s a diabetic and needs them for his insulin.”
Me: “Okay. I still need to see some ID. Do you know his date of birth?”
Customer: “I’ll never forget his date of birth. I had it tattooed on my arm the day he died.”
(The customer proceeds to show everyone in the pharmacy the tattoo of his deceased father’s DOB–the same father that he is trying to buy syringes for.)
(I am a customer in line at a pharmacy. A mother and her two youngs boys is ahead of me. One of the young boys is sitting on the floor pointing at random medicines.)
Boy: “Mummy, what’s that for?”
Mother: “That’s for an itchy head.”
Boy: “Mummy, what’s that for?”
Mother: “That’s for when you can’t sleep.”
(The boy then points at the pregnancy tests.)
Boy: “Mummy, what’s that for?”
Mother: “That’s to see if you have a baby growing inside of you!”
(The boy then stands up and gets back in line with his mother.)
Mother, to me and the pharmacist: “Thank god he didn’t point at the condoms!”
Me: “Oh I’m really sorry, due to extenuating circumstances we don’t have a pharmacist at the moment so legally I can’t give out any prescriptions. But if you wait 5 minutes, a replacement pharmacist will be here and then you can take it.”
Customer: “But I need it. Give it to me!”
Me: “I understand your problem but I would be breaking the law if I gave it to you.”
Customer: “I work in the pharmaceutical industry and I know for a fact you are lying! Give it to me now!”
(The pharmacist arrives and I explain the problem.)
Pharmacist: “I’m really sorry for the inconvenience but my colleague was right, there was nothing she could do. But now that I’m here, you can take your prescription.”
Customer: “You’re colleague is a cruel, moral-less b**** with the intelligence of a moron. She has endangered my life! I shall take this to court and win!” *storms out*
Me: *to pharmacist* “What was in her prescription?”
Customer: “Yes, can you give me advice about his stool?”
Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t give medical advice. Perhaps you’d like to speak to our pharmacist, or consult your doctor?”
Customer: “No, I’m sure they’re very busy. I just want someone to tell me if it’s normal.”
Me: “The law says I can’t give advice. Let me get the pharmacist.”
Customer: “No, really, I have some here.” *whips out a clear bag of poo on the counter* “See, it’s all gritty. That’s not normal, is it? Do you have pills for that?”
Me: “Ma’am, you might want to take that to your doctor. We can’t accept biological waste.”
Customer: *to her husband* “See, Joe, I told you it was wrong. That’s why I save them.”
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