Have A Heart, Use Your Brain

Diabetes Meets Rabies
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 27, 2013
(A customer is picking up some diabetic test-strips, and I am ringing him up.)

Me: “How are you doing today, sir?”

Customer: “I’m alright; how about yourself?”

Me: “I’m doing great, thanks. Did you have any questions for the pharmacist?”

(The customer gestures at the test strips, jokingly.)

Customer: “Yeah, do I really have to poke myself for these to work?”

Me: “Yep, I’m afraid so.”

Customer: “Can’t I just poke you instead?”

Me: *laughing* “Sorry, I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way, sir.”

(The customer gestures at my multiple facial piercings.)

Customer: “You look like the type that would enjoy that, though.”

Me: “Your doctor might have a problem with that, though.”

(When a customer picks up a prescription, they’re required by law to sign, stating that they’ve received it. Our pharmacy does this through an electronic prompt. The customer looks at it.)

Customer: “What’s this?”

Me: “It’s just a way to say that you’ve gotten your prescription. That way there’s no confusion later. It’s as much for your protection as ours really.”

Customer: “Well what happens if I don’t sign it?”

Me: “Then unfortunately, we’re not allowed to give you your prescriptions.”

Customer: “WELL I GUESS I’M NOT GETTING ANYTHING TODAY!”

(The customer THROWS the electronic pen across the counter, hitting me in the face. He turns, and practically skips away. The pharmacist and I aren’t sure if he is joking, but by the end of the day he still hasn’t come back!)

The Opposite Of Disappearing Ink
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 21, 2013
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it looks like this prescription is expired.”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “The law says we can’t take prescriptions this old.”

Customer: “But you said it’s expired. Where does it say that?”

Me: “It doesn’t, but see the date? That’s several months old. We couldn’t fill it now if we tried.”

Customer: “You’re telling me if I’d brought this in exactly as it is just a few months ago, you’d have been able to take it?”

Me: “Theoretically, yes.”

Customer: “So why won’t you take it now? Nothing’s changed!”

Me: “Except today’s date, sir. The prescription expired a few weeks after it was written. You can even see the disclaimer written at the bottom.”

Customer: “So why doesn’t it notify me when it expires? It ought to say ‘expired’ on it!”

Me: “Um… the paper isn’t going to magically print the word ‘expired’ if you wait too long to bring it in.”

Customer: “Well, it should!”

This Cashier’s Number Is Up
PHARMACY | WORKING | JUNE 9, 2013
(I am 20 years old at this time. Valentine’s Day is approaching, so I go out to the store to buy some fake wine and chocolates for my boyfriend.)

Cashier: “Oooh, a date for Valentine’s Day?”

Me: “Yep! We’re going out to dinner, and I thought I’d buy this stuff for dessert.”

Cashier: “Nice! Can I see some ID for the wine?”

Me: “Oh, that’s grape juice. It doesn’t have alcohol.”

Cashier: “No, I need to see your ID for the wine. I can’t sell it to you if you’re under 21.”

Me: “No, it’s sparkling grape juice. I’m 20 and I’ve bought it before. It doesn’t have any alcohol in it.”

Cashier: “I suppose I can let it slide for a pretty girl like you.”

Me: “Excuse me? First off, that would be illegal if this was real wine, and second, I just mentioned I have a boyfriend. It’s fake wine. Please just let me buy this and leave.”

Cashier: “No need to be like that. I’ll sell it to you.”

Me: “Thank you! What’s my total?”

Cashier: “Your phone number.”

Me: “What?”

Cashier: “I’ll give this to you for your phone number! I can take you out someplace really nice to eat, and then we can go back to my place if you know what I mean. I get free condoms for working here!”

Me: “Here’s $10. This should cover my purchases. I’m going to leave and pretend you didn’t just ask me to have sex with you in exchange for dinner and my groceries.”

Needs To Take A Chill Pill, Part 2
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 4, 2013
Me: “Thank you for calling [Pharmacy], how can I—”

Customer: “So I just requested a refill, and I want to know when it will be ready.”

Me: “Okay, what is your name?”

(The customer gives her name. I see that no refill was requested. The medication is out of refills, and needs approval from the doctor.)

Me: “I am very sorry, but we must not have gotten your refill request. I see that there are no refills available. I am going to have to fax the doctor.”

Customer: “I did that. I went to their site and asked the doctor to do that. It should have just given my request to you, and it should be ready by now.”

Me: “So, which website did you go to? Was it ours, or your doctor’s site?”

Customer: “His, duh! How can you be that stupid? I requested it, and you see that request, and then you just fill out the paper to give me refills. All the doctor does is sign it. It should take like all of five minutes to get that done. So when the h*** is my prescription going to be ready?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry. We are in no way connected to your doctor’s office. They have their own software, and we have ours. We cannot in any way see what you have requested with your doctor’s office. We have to wait until he contacts us, and sometimes that can take up to three days for a response. Now if you are out of this medica—”

Customer: “This is unacceptable! I know how these computer things work. You can look up any person’s prescriptions anywhere and anytime, no matter what pharmacy they are at! Now fill my f****** prescription!”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no way I can do that. That would be in direct violation of federal law. There is a privacy act that means that we cannot share medical information with anyone else without your direct consent. Would you like it if I could access your medical record right now and see things like what you went to the ER for?”

(Note: this customer is a notorious drug seeker, and is well known at ERs and Urgent Cares throughout the area. She also knows that we know.)

Customer: “…uh, no.”

Me: “That’s why we can’t see anything your doctor may have on you, or what requests you may have made to him. It’s to protect your privacy. Now since this isn’t a narcotic, I can ask the pharmacist if we can advance you some of your medication until we hear back from the doctor.”

Customer: “Uh yeah, okay. That will be fine then.”

(My pharmacist later pulls me to the side and tells me that I did a great job with a difficult customer, and with keeping my cool. Come Christmas time, I got a few extra bucks in my bonus!)

Doing More Pharm Than Good
CALIFORNIA, EMPLOYEES, LAZY/UNHELPFUL, PHARMACY, SACRAMENTO, USA | WORKING | MAY 31, 2013
(My daughter has a seizure disorder. We are a low-income family, and we get low-cost insurance through the state for her. However, because of this disorder, she has separate insurance through the state; the pharmacy knows this.)

Tech: “Um, okay, so we tried to run your daughter’s medication and it won’t go through. We have to contact [Regular] insurance to see why it won’t go through.”

Me: “Wait, no… you have to run it through [Other] insurance. I called this in like three days ago, and you are now just calling me?! That is the medication she takes for her seizures. I am out, too, and I can’t have her miss a dose.”

Tech: “We did and it didn’t work. You can pay cash for it. That’s $54.99.”

Me: “Look, I am low income. I can’t afford something that expensive. Are you sure you ran it through the right insurance?”

Tech: “Uh, yeah. It’s not my fault you let your insurance lapse or something. You need to call [Regular] insurance and take care of it on your end or else pay cash.”

(I call my daughter’s regular insurance, who confirms my side of things. They call the pharmacy and get them to approve the medication. I call back but request to speak with a pharmacist directly.)

Me: “So, did it work this time?”

Pharmacist: “Yeah, it did. I’m sorry [Tech] was acting that way. She just didn’t want to run it on the other insurance because it takes a few more steps to make.”

Me: “Yeah, I know. I’ve heard this song and dance every month for the last three months and nothing has changed. Look, my kid was totally out of her seizure meds! She could have had a seizure because of your lack of calling me about it in a timely manner and making jump through hoops I don’t need to.”

Pharmacist: “Well, I’m really busy, and I can’t watch everything they do all the time.”

Me: “Wow, you just inspired me to take my business elsewhere and call corporate to complain.”

(Within two hours, my daughter’s prescriptions were transferred to another pharmacy where they DO take the time to run it correctly and call me if/when there is a problem. I recently went back into that first store to return something and there was an entirely new staff in the pharmacy. I hope these ones do actually care!)

Make His Life A Living Bell
PHARMACY | ROMANTIC | AUGUST 13, 2013
(I am a cashier at a small town pharmacy. An older customer walks in making a jingling sound, and I see that he has bells tied to his shoelaces. It is August, and he appears anything but jolly, so I am perplexed by the bells.)

Me: “Sir, if you don’t mind my asking: why the bells?”

Customer: “My wife is going deaf, and she gets mad when I ‘sneak up on her.’ This was her solution.”

In Need Of Valium
PHARMACY | RELATED | AUGUST 7, 2013
(I am eight years old. My mom and I are shopping, and we pass the drug store.)

Mom: “I need to go there.”

Me: “Mommy, no, I’m tired! I wanna go home; let’s go home!”

Mom: “No. It’ll be quick.”

(Mom pulls me into the drug store.)

Me: “Why do we have to go here? It’s a bad place!”

Mom: “Oh, really? Why do you say that.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s called a drug store, and I heard that drugs are bad! On TV!”

Mom: “Uh huh.”

Me: *to other customers* “DRUGGIES! You’re bad people! Drugs are BAD—”

(My mom hustles me out of there and never takes me back!)

You Really Don’t Want That On An Open Wound
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JULY 17, 2013
(I’m currently doing inventory at the local pharmacy where I work. An older customer comes up to me with her friend, in a panic.)

Customer: “Can you help me?! I need some ‘Polysperm’!”

(I assume she means ‘Polysporin’, the topical ointment that treats infections.)

Me: “Did you mean ‘Polysporin’?”

Customer: “Oh, no! I DEFINITELY need some ‘Polysperm’!”

Me: “I’m sorry; I haven’t heard of that product. May I ask what you are using it for?”

Customer: “Oh, I scraped my elbow, and want to put that ‘Polysperm’ on it!”

Me: “Okay, let me show you where it’s stocked.”

(I point to the display of ‘Polysporin’.)

Customer: *to her friend* “Young kids these days! They don’t know anything!”

An Impatient Patient
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JULY 11, 2013
(It is a Sunday, so not many pharmacies are open. I’ve come in with my friend, who is rather unwell. The staff know my husband and I quite well, as we’re in there for our regular medication. Additionally, I have multiple piercings, a rather large tattoo on my nape of my neck, and teal green hair.)

Pharmacist: “Won’t be long; please take a seat.”

(We do, and I give the tech I know well a smile and a nod in greeting. Another customer enters.)

Customer: “How long will it be for my medication?”

Pharmacist: “About 20 minutes. We have a few people in front of you.”

Customer: “Fine. I wouldn’t come here if you weren’t the only pharmacy open on a bloody Sunday; you’re always slow!”

(The pharmacist brushes it off and goes to make up medications.)

Customer: “I’m only having to wait this long because of stupid drug freaks.”

(My friend turns to say something, but I put my hand on her arm and shake my head.)

Customer: “Yeah, I mean you, green freak! What, come in for your methadone early, and they won’t give it to you?”

(I’ve deliberately turned my back on him at this point.)

Customer: “F****** druggies! We pay for you to get f****** high.”

Pharmacy Tech: “Sir, can you watch your language please?”

Customer: “No I f****** won’t! That stupid b**** is the reason I have to wait so f****** long! She’s strung out, look at the f****** circles under her eyes; they’re all bloodshot!”

Pharmacy Tech: “I’ll have you know that young lady there is a full-time carer for her husband, who is disabled. And all this whilst being disabled herself. She looks like she hasn’t slept in a week because she probably hasn’t; between caring for him, volunteering with [national advice organization], and helping out her friend here who is rather unwell. And I don’t personally care if my taxes are being used to help her out; I wish there were more people like her out there!”

Customer: “I… I… I demand to see a pharmacist!”

Pharmacist: “Sir, I am not going to reprimand my tech for handling that much better than I would have. Do not insult my customers. Here is your prescription back; please fill it somewhere else.”

(The customer stomps out.)

Me: “I’m really sorry I caused that.”

Pharmacist: “Eh, don’t worry; he’s always an a** when he comes in here. Besides, he has an exemption certificate, which means our taxes are paying for his meds too!”

A Leftist Agenda
PHARMACY | RIGHT | JUNE 29, 2013
(I am filling out a form to refill my medication. A fellow customer, here for a flu shot, sits down next to me. Note that I’m left-handed.)

Customer: “Woah! How are you doing that with your left hand?”

Me: “I’m left-handed.”

Customer: “Don’t you people like, flip around letters?”

Me: “No, can’t say I do. I think you’re thinking of dyslexia, which some left-handed people have.”

Customer: “Huh…”

(The customer notices that I’m writing with a gel pen.)

Customer: “Wait… you people can’t use gel pens! How do you write with that?”

Me: “Carefully.”

Customer: “What would happen if you used your right hand? Would it, like, work?”

Me: “Well, for most of us, no. My left hand is like your right hand, and my right hand is like your left hand. You could probably use your left hand if you had to, but it’s not ideal. The same goes for me with my right hand.”

Customer: “That’s so weird! I’ve never seen anything like this!

Herd Behavior, Part 2
PHARMACY | ROMANTIC | APRIL 26, 2013
(I’m a 25-year-old Brony. I use a Brony lanyard with several Pony buttons on it to wear my name tag, and a wallet that has a short leather Rainbow Dash tail sticking out of my back pocket. I also have looks that some consider girly, and am often confused for a girl. I am serving a male customer who appears to be around my age.)

Customer: “Hi… I’m here to pick up my Dad’s prescriptions.”

Me: “Certainly, I just need the name and date of birth.”

Customer: “So, when do you get off?”

Me: “Uh… why?”

Customer: “Well, I was wondering if you might want to go out for drinks a little later.”

Me: “Whoa, buddy, stop right there. I’m probably not your type, anyway, since I’m a guy.”

Customer: “Oh, yeah, I can tell. I like your wallet by the way.”

Me: “Thanks. I’m a Brony, but, uh… I don’t really swing that way, man. I have a girlfriend; she actually gave me the bracelet as a gift.”

(I take out my wallet, and show him the picture of us in the front.)

Customer: “Oh! That’s a cute picture. That’s too bad.”

Me: “No big deal, though. I’m actually kind of flattered; you’re the first guy to hit on me thinking I’m a guy. Usually it’s some pervert that thinks I’m a girl. It’s usually one of those ‘anything that moves and has boobs’ types.”

Customer: “Hah! No way! Have a good one. Gimme a brohoof, and tell your girlfriend she’s lucky.”

(We brohoof, and he leaves. Thank Celestia for people who can take ‘no’ for an answer!)

Coworkers-In-Arms
PHARMACY | WORKING | APRIL 22, 2013
(When we get truck, they normally try and schedule it so at least one male is working to help, since the boxes are stacked up very high and often quite heavy. On this particular day however it’s me and the store manager who is notoriously lazy. I’m only five feet tall and he’s well over six feet.)

Store Manager: “[My name], I need you to start sorting the totes.”

Me: “I’m going to need some help.”

Store Manager: “There’s no reason you can’t do it!”

Me: “So, you think I should be able to scale the ladder, lift a bulky 35 pound tote and make my way safely back down?”

Store Manager: “Yes, why is that so hard?”

Me: “It’s not safe.”

Store Manager: “I don’t care how you do it. Just get it done!”

(He stalks off while I try and figure out how to do this. One of our pharmacy techs cuts through the backroom and sees me; I’m visibly upset at this point.)

Pharmacy Tech: “Hey, what are you doing?”

Me: “[Store manager] left me alone to try and get all these totes down.”

Pharmacy Tech: “Right, like that’s totally safe.”

Me: “He doesn’t care. I’m just trying to figure out the best way to do it to avoid not only hurting myself, but breaking anything.”

Pharmacy Tech: “Yeah, hang on…”

(He goes back into the pharmacy before reappearing and shucking his vest.)

Pharmacy Tech: “We’re slow, and like h*** I’m letting you do this by yourself. The pharmacist told me to go ahead and help you.”

Me: “Won’t you get in trouble?”

Pharmacy Tech: “I’d like to see him try and get me in trouble.”

(The tech helps me get the down so I can more easily sort the totes. After we’ve finished, the store manager shows back up.)

Store Manager: “I can’t believe you’ve only gotten this much done!”

Me: “Well, maybe if you were actually halfway competent you would have realized that you were supposed to be helping me! I’m one person, what exactly have you been doing all this time? Sit around on your butt texting in the office, most likely!”

Store Manager: “You can’t talk to me that way! I’m your boss!”

Me: “Not anymore!”

(I threw my name tag at him and walked out. Several other members of management called to try and get me to come back, but I refused. I found a job at another pharmacy and shortly later, my pharmacy tech buddy joined me there!)

Prescribing Perspective
PHARMACY | RIGHT | APRIL 16, 2013
Me: “How may I help you, ma’am?”

Customer #1 : “I’m picking up a script for [name].”

(I proceed to look it up. However, the system alerts me that we do not have anything ready.)

Me: “I don’t see that we have anything ready for you, ma’am.”

Customer #1 : “What do you mean, you don’t have anything! They called two days ago!”

Me: “I apologize, ma’am. If a prescription sits on our shelf for too long, we have to put it back on our stock shelf.”

Customer #1 : “It’s only been a week! That’s just stupid! Give me back my script! I’ll go to [rival store]! Only one week! Absurd!”

(I escort her to my co-worker, so that I may help the other customers in line.)

Customer #2 : “Oh, honey, I think I may have done the same thing and waited too long; can you check?”

Me: “Certainly, sir.”

(I check, and indeed his was placed back to stock as well.)

Me: “Yes, sir, I’m afraid so.”

(Customer #2 speaks loud enough for everyone to hear.)

Customer #2 : “Oh, shoot. IT’S PURELY MY FAULT FOR FORGETTING, EVEN AFTER Y’ALL WERE SO NICE TO CALL ME TWICE. Thank you, sugar; I’ll go talk to [co-worker].

Prescription Affliction
PHARMACY | RIGHT | MARCH 27, 2013
(I am a pharmacy technician. The pharmacist receives a call.)

Caller: “This is Lisa; I am calling from Dr. [Name]’s office. I need to call in a prescription for a patient.”

Pharmacist: “Sure, what is the patient’s name?”

Caller: “It is [Patient].”

Pharmacist: “And the prescription?”

Caller: “It’s [narcotic], 90 pills, three times a day.”

Pharmacist: “Okay, thanks.”

(The pharmacist hangs up and turns to me, frowning.)

Pharmacist: “Do you know anything about this?”

Me: “What? No, why?”

(The pharmacist shows me the called-in prescription.)

Me: “Oh! Lisa was fired months ago. You had better call the police.”

(When Lisa came in to pick up the narcotic prescription for her boyfriend, the police were there to arrest her. The doctor she used to work for is my father; she was trying to use his license number to get pills from a dozen nearby pharmacies.)

You Got Dad’s Back
HEALTH & BODY, JERK, PHARMACY | RIGHT | MARCH 26, 2013
(I am eight years old. My mother, father, and I are all in the chemist to get some medication. My father has a rare spinal condition which is causing him to wobble when he walks, even with a frame. We’re waiting at the counter and hear a customer behind us make a remark under their breath; deliberately loud enough for us to hear.)

Customer: “Drunk at nine am; you should be ashamed.”

(We try to ignore it.)

Customer: “This is disgusting; you should be so embarrassed.”

(I don’t like this person being rude to my father.)

Me: “Watch your tone lady. If you’d bother to be polite and ask if my father is okay, you’d know he has a special illness that makes him this way. He’s not drunk; he’s my father, and I love him. Now apologize for being so mean about him.”

(She went red, stammered, and went down an aisle. The pharmacist gave me a lollipop.)

One Good Deed Job-Leads To Another
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 28, 2013
(I am working late at night in a 24-hour pharmacy. There are only three customers in the store: a scruffy but clean young couple and another gentleman. The woman in the young couple is very heavily pregnant, and her partner is picking up the range of baby hats we carry and holding them up against her stomach, then looking at the prices and sadly putting them back. They pick up a packet of the cheapest pain medication we carry and bring it to the counter.)

Female Customer: “I’m sorry, but can you please ask the pharmacist if these are safe for me to take?”

Me: “Of course!”

(While we’re waiting for the pharmacist to come out, they tell me they’re expecting their daughter any day now. The pharmacist has been watching the young couple since they came in.)

Pharmacist: “These are fine, but can I ask why you need them?”

Female Customer: “Oh, I have a horrible cough that’s making my back ache even worse. I can’t get to sleep.”

(The pharmacist goes through a list of cough medicines safe for her to take, before the young man shakes his head with tears in his eyes.)

Male Customer: “I’m sorry, I’ve just lost my job and we really can’t afford any of those. Sorry for wasting your time.”

Pharmacist: “That’s okay, but this packet is damaged, and legally I can’t let you take it. Seeing as it was the last one, let me and [my name] go look in the back for some more.”

(The pharmacist takes me out the back, where he puts three packets of name brand painkillers, four bottles of name brand cough syrup, a wheat bag for her back, a tin of formula, a packet of newborn nappies and a few of the hats the couple was looking at into a box. He hands me the box and tells me to take it out to them. I do and they both burst into tears, thanking us over and over again. They leave with huge smiles on their faces.)

Female Customer: “Thank you again!”

Other Customer: “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help but over hear. Did you say you just lost your job at [local company]?”

Male Customer: “Yes, I was an IT tech.”

Other Customer: “I own [other computer store in the area], and I’m looking for a new tech. Can you start tomorrow?”

(There were tears all round that night. A week later, the young woman brought in her beautiful daughter and a giant batch of cupcakes for the pharmacy staff. Best night at work ever!)

Probably Needs Some Valium Too
PHARMACY | RIGHT | MAY 17, 2013
(A customer comes into the drive thru.)

Me: “Hello, how are you, ma’am?”

Customer: “I want my Nexium.”

(She provides her information, but I see that nothing has been filled.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I don’t see that we have anything ready for you.”

Customer: “This always f****** happens! I’ve been trying to get my f****** Nexium for a month! I dropped it off here a month ago!”

Me: “You dropped it off at this location?”

(I ask this, as there are many branches of our chain within a 10 mile radius of each other.)

Customer: “Yes, I only fill here!”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no Nexium in your profile.”

Customer: “Yes their f****** is! This always f****** happens!”

(My coworker takes over, trying to calm her down. My manager has had enough of her mouth, and he goes to tell her off.)

Manager: “Ma’am! You have never filled here! It is not here! We have nothing for you!”

(The customer continues to curse up a storm. Another customer stares at the drive thru window, looking between it and me.)

Customer #2 : “That b**** be crazy.”

Me: “I agree, sir.”

(I suddenly hear the drive thru window slam, and the car speed away.)

Me: “Sorry you had to hear all that, sir.”

Customer #2 : “Nah it’s cool. Hey if something happens, I heard everything!”

It’s Apparent He’s A Parent
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 13, 2013
(My first child is sick and has been up all night crying with a fever. Before the store even opens, I am in the parking lot staring through the store window at the medicine I need with my sick, screaming baby. I can see and hear two employees nearby watching and making fun of me.)

Rude Employee #1 : “Oh my god, do you see that? That crack w**** is here with her crack baby so early in the morning! I thought those kinds of people only came out at night.”

Rude Employee #2 : “I guess you can never tell. I wonder what’s so important that she has to bring her screaming brat with her before we even open?”

(I ignore them as I wait patiently, but after another ten minutes my patience is wearing thin. I am about to tell them off when another employee walks up to the front doors and opens them.)

Nice Employee: “Ma’am, I know the store isn’t open for another twenty minutes, but I wanted to check on you.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. My baby has had a fever all night and just won’t sleep! I only need something to help her fever so she’ll stop crying.”

Nice Employee: “I see. Would you come with me, please?”

(He opens the door for me and lets me into the store.)

Nice Employee: “Get what you need and I’ll meet you on register one to ring you out.”

Rude Employee #1 : “Hey! Don’t let that crack w**** in here. Her baby’s not sick! She’s just scamming you so she can shoplift!”

(Fortunately, the nice employee ignores them and helps me find what I need and walks me to the front of the store)

Nice Employee: “I’m sorry we let you wait out there so long. If I had known I would have gotten to you sooner. Unfortunately the registers are still not open, so I can’t ring you in, but I can let you go home with the medicine.”

Me: “But I have to pay for it. Let me at least leave some money here. You’ve been so nice; you can keep the extra as a tip.”

Nice Employee: “Ma’am, that’s very sweet of you, but I must insist you take your medicine and your sweet little girl home. As a single father, I have been in your shoes before, so I would like to pay for your baby’s medicine.”

Me: “Thank you. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you so much!”

(I always go back to that store just because of that one nice employee. He totally makes up for the rude ones.)

Makes A Difference When Cashiers Are Minus A Few Brain Cells
PHARMACY | WORKING | MAY 8, 2013
(I’m buying a common cold medicine that is OTC, but you have to be 18 to buy. At the time, I’m 19.)

Cashier: “I need to see your ID.”

(I hand it to her.)

Cashier: “Oh, I’m sorry. I can’t sell this to you.”

Me: “What? Why not? ”

Cashier: “Well, I have to be able to verify you’re over 18.”

Me: “Is there a problem with my ID?”

Cashier: “You were born in 1989.”

Me: “Yes, and it’s 2008, so I’m 19.”

Cashier: “But you could be lying because I don’t know how to figure out how old you are if you were born in 1989. It’s too hard to subtract!”

Don’t Ask What He Puts In His Granola
PHARMACY | RIGHT | MAY 3, 2013
(A customer comes in, and looks confused for several minutes.)

Me: “Sir, can I help you find something?”

Customer: “Where is the yogurt?”

Me: “All of our dairy products are in the cooler.”

Customer: “No, yogurt. You know, yogurt that you put under your arms.”

Me: “…you mean deodorant?”

Customer: “Yes, yogurt!”

Me: “…aisle four.”